


The Eve

by vii_x_mmx



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Drama & Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Light Angst, like super eventual idk if i'll do it smut, no beta we die like Glenn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2021-02-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:42:31
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 44
Words: 115,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23893264
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vii_x_mmx/pseuds/vii_x_mmx
Summary: Things at the Officer's Academy are becoming less and less predictable. First Byleth is assigned as the Blue Lion's new professor out of nowhere, then Lonato starts a rebellion that no one saw coming. Now with the Blue Sea Moon beginning and the threat of assassination looming over the students, Dimitri returns from official business in Faerghus with a stranger on his arm.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Original Female Character(s), Felix Hugo Fraldarius/Original Female Character(s), Other eventual pairings - Relationship
Comments: 5
Kudos: 59





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic so please be nice! I'd love any feedback from anyone :) The story starts during White Clouds' Blue Sea moon. It will follow the events of Azure Moon, so fair warning there will be spoilers in the future. Enjoy!

“Dimitri.”

It was a statement, not a question; demanding his attention as they neared the monastery. His name was the first word she had uttered to him since they departed Faerghus. And though he had been acutely aware of her sitting beside him for their whole journey, her voice still startled him.

“Is everything alright?” He asked, turning to look at her with concern. Though she was a perfect stranger, he was still determined to show her every ounce of respect and chivalry.

“We’re nearly there,” she said softly, tilting her head slightly to look out of the carriage window at the looming mass of Garreg Mach before them.

“Yes.” He nodded, noting that it seemed she wanted to say something more.

As he waited for her to speak, Dimitri took the time to finally, truly look at her. She didn’t look like anyone from Faerghus he had ever seen with her hair that was even darker than Felix’s and her eyes the colour of emeralds. Her stoic face was reminiscent of his new professor at the academy. It didn’t appear that she was trying to hide her emotions, but more so that she didn’t have any to begin with. But as they drew closer to their destination, Dimitri thought he saw a flicker of something in her eyes. Was it fear? Anger?

“I’m sorry you got dragged into this,” she said finally, her gaze meeting his.

“Please,” Dimitri shook his head, trying to smile comfortingly, “I am happy to help those in need.”

“You don’t have to do that.” It was her turn to shake her head. “I never meant for anyone else to get involved. You don’t have to pretend like this doesn’t suck. After all, it’s all my fault and now you’re stuck with me for life”

She was right, their situation did—as she said—‘suck’. But it wasn’t as if Dimitri hadn’t expected to be arranged to marry someone. He knew that as the future king he wouldn’t be able to marry just anyone. However, he didn’t anticipate being engaged at the age of seventeen. He had at least thought he would have graduated from the Officer’s Academy before he was betrothed to another. But things never did happen as he expected; case in point, he was currently riding to the monastery with his fiancée by his side.

“We may not be able to change the circumstances,” Dimitri spoke carefully, trying to figure out the best way to form the complex feelings swirling around inside him into words, “but I’m determined not to let that get me down. If I am to be ‘stuck’ with you as you say, then I will do my best to make sure neither of us feel that way. I will do everything in my power to make you happy regardless of how we came to be here.”

At that, she let out a small puff of air and looked away. Something between discomfort and guilt briefly creased the space between her eyebrows before she met the prince’s eyes again. When she met his unwavering gaze, she was surprised to see the sincerity in it. Anyone could say words of comfort, but as far as she could tell the blonde youth before her meant what he said. At first assessment she had thought him naïve and idealistic, but his words and the look in his eyes made her question this initial judgement.

“You’re a good man, Dimitri Blaiddyd.” She sighed, reaching out to place her hand over his.

“T-thank you.” He stammered, unsure of what else to say as a blush creeped over his cheeks at the sudden contact.

“I’m afraid I haven’t been very good company.” She left her hand over his though she turned to look out the window once more. “I didn’t know what I was feeling. To be engaged so suddenly, and to someone I’ve never met. Surely you feel the same?”

“I think I may understand a little of what you’re feeling, yes.” Dimitri nodded, looking down at where their hands rested together on the seat bench.

Silence fell upon the two of them once more as they came ever closer to Garreg Mach. It felt as though with each metre travelled the reality of their situation sunk in just a little deeper. As soon as they made it back to the Officer’s Academy, their new roles would begin—a prince and his fiancée, madly in love. A simple façade they could only hope they’d be able to pull off.

“Eve.”

It was a statement, not a question; a plead for her to look at him as their carriage came to a halt. It was the first time he had called her by name and for some reason it felt foreign in his mouth. But as she turned to him, he saw true emotion in her eyes that had not been there before. And though he still could not place what exactly that emotion was, seeing it gave him the confidence he needed to continue. He turned his hand that hers was rested on over so that their palms met and squeezed lightly, reassuringly. In that simple gesture he hoped that he could convey all of the words he didn’t know how to say at that moment. There was no telling what would happen once they stepped out of that carriage, no guarantee they could pull off their elaborate charade.

He watched as Eve closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. After a moment, she gave his hand the lightest, almost imperceptive, squeeze back. When she opened her eyes and met his gaze, he could tell something had shifted. There was determination in her eyes, a determination that fed his own. And as the door to their carriage was opened, the two of them gave each other a small nod.

“Shall we?”


	2. One

Byleth couldn’t help but be curious as to what had her class so preoccupied that morning as she lectured. There was an underlying excitement buzzing around the room that she wasn’t so foolish as to believe was a result of her explanation on battalion leadership techniques. The Blue Lions were a rowdy class to begin with, but today was something different. To their credit, they did seem to be trying to focus on her lecture; but whatever had them all riled up was keeping them from giving their all and she could tell. Even her more reserved students like Mercedes and Dedue, who more or less seemed to stay out of trouble, were distracted.

With a small sigh, Byleth decided that it was probably best if she gave the class a small break before their afternoon training. That way, they could hopefully get whatever it was out of their systems and focus on the rest of their classes that day. And though she would never admit it, Byleth was also curious to know what it was that had everyone excited. Not much happened at the monastery in terms of excitement and she was beginning to miss the tumultuous life of a mercenary. Perhaps whatever gossip was circulating could be of some entertainment value to her.

“That’s enough for this morning,” she said flatly, closing her notebook with a dull snap. “You can use this time to relax or study before we go to the training grounds. But remain in the classroom.”

She added the last bit as an afterthought. Not only did she want her students staying around so she could eavesdrop, she also didn’t want to give Seteth any more reasons to lecture her. Surely if he saw her students roaming around when they were supposed to be studying she wouldn’t hear the end of it for another moon.

As soon as she broke class, the room erupted into a cacophony of voices and Byleth watched her students gather around Ashe of all people. She noted that the excitement seemed to have lifted even his mood which was an improvement after their last mission.

“Ashe, tell Ingrid what you told me.” Sylvain said, moving from his seat at the back of the room to sit on Ashe’s desk at the front.

“Sylvain, unlike you I want to use this time to actually study instead of gossip.” Ingrid sighed but made no move to retrieve her study materials from her bag.

“Is it true, Ashe?” Annete asked, bouncing on her toes. “Did you really hear the knights saying that Dimitri’s bringing someone back today?”

“A-ah, yeah.” Ashe stuttered and nodded. “W-well actually I’m not sure.”

“What do you mean you’re not sure?” Even Felix was involved now, though he was still putting on an air of indifference.

“It’s just that, well, I heard one of the knights this morning say that a new student was arriving today.” Ashe now had the attention of the full class. And though Byleth was doing her best to look like she was marking papers, she was also listening closely to their conversation. “And I remembered that His Highness is supposed to come back from Fhirdiad today too. So I figured chances are whoever is coming here is coming with him.”

“Do you know anything about this, Dedue?” Mercedes turned to the prince’s vassal who sat apart from the group, the only one not involved.

“His Highness was not permitted to share with me the details of his trip to the capital.” Dedue replied. 

It had come as a shock to everyone when Dimitri announced he was leaving for Fhirdiad on official business without his closest aide. The whole trip had been shrouded in mystery and even before today there had been plenty of rumours on what the prince was up to.

“I’m telling you,” Sylvain started with a laugh, stretching his arms to interlock his fingers behind his head, “Dimitri finally started paying attention to girls and found himself a lady up there. I’ll bet gold that the new student is his fiancée.”

“Just because that’s what you would do doesn’t mean that’s what Dimitri did.” Ingrid chided. 

“Ooh I hope whoever it is is nice.” Annette giggled before turning to Mercedes. “Do you think they’ll be nice Mercie?”

“I’m sure they’ll be nice, Annie.” The older girl smiled sweetly.

A new student, huh? Byleth thought to herself. She hadn’t been told anything about a new student joining her class. But it wasn’t like Seteth trusted her with much information. Though she had only been at Garreg Mach a short time, the former mercenary got the feeling that the monastery was very much run on a ‘need to know’ basis. And for the time being she was still not included in the list of people who needed to know.

“Maybe we shouldn’t get so ahead of ourselves.” Ashe cut back in to the conversation as the others speculated what kind of person this new student could be. “After all, there’s no guarantee this person is actually joining our class. It could be totally unrelated to His Highness returning today.”

“Aw, I guess you’re right.” Annette deflated slightly.

“Come on Ashe!” Sylvain clapped the sliver haired boy on the back. “Have a little fun. Who cares if we’re right or wrong. I’m just thankful something’s finally happening around here.”

“I just hope they’re someone worthy of crossing blades with.” Felix muttered.

“That’s all you care about, Felix.” Ingrid rolled her eyes. “Do you have any theories as to who this new person could be?”

“Probably just another stray dog the boar picked up off the streets,” he spat with a pointed look at Dedue.

Dedue ignored Felix’s comment and carried on with his studying, copying his notes from their morning lecture into Dimitri’s notebook. And while he was trying to remain aloof, Dedue was the most curious as to who Dimitri could be bringing back with him. It already bothered the man of Duscur that he hadn’t been allowed to accompany the prince in his journey. Whatever it was that Dimitri had been summoned for, he hadn’t been able to tell Dedue anything about it.

Just as the conversation amongst the Blue Lions was reaching a peak, the doors to the classroom opened with a creak. Everyone turned to look at the open doorway, a hush falling over them. And even Byleth finally allowed herself the outwardly express her interest as she stood to greet whoever was coming through the door.

“I apologise for the interruption, professor.” Seteth strode into the room, a critical eye scanning over the students. “I have an announcement to make.”

“Of course, Seteth,” she began, “I was just giving my students some free study time.”

Everyone’s attention was not on the Archbishop’s most trusted aide, but rather the two figures that followed into the room behind him. The first was familiar, Dimitri standing tall as he greeted his friends and peers with a smile and a small nod. The second, however, was someone none of them had ever seen before. 

By anyone’s standards she would be called beautiful. She was tall, standing just shy of Dimitri’s height, and held herself with the poise expected of a noble. Her black hair fell just below her shoulders, shimmering like ink as she moved her head to survey her surroundings. But what was most astonishing about her was her green eyes. They seemed to pull everyone in, drawing their attention with their mesmerising gaze.

“I would like to introduce you all to the newest student at the Officer’s Academy.” Seteth cleared his throat, moving aside to allow everyone a better look at the girl beside Dimitri. 

“Hello,” she greeted the class, her voice was deeper than expected with a hint of rasp to it that didn’t seem to match her outward appearance, “my name is Eve. I do hope we can enjoy our time together here at the academy.”

She bowed deeply towards the class and when she returned to her upright posture, she smiled brightly before turning to look at Dimitri as if for encouragement. The whole class watched as he smiled back at her, nodding with satisfaction.

“Eve and I are to be married once we graduate the Officer’s Academy.” It was Dimitri who spoke this time. “I requested that she join me here so that she can learn more about governing before we are wed. I trust you will all welcome my fiancée with open arms.”

Murmurs rippled throughout the class, all with varying degrees of incredulity. Was that what Dimitri had gone to the capital for? It made no sense for his journey to be so secretive if it had only been for him to get engaged.

“I understand that there will be some…excitement,” Seteth said over the din, “but please see to it that this does not distract from your mission this month. Do not forget we are operating under the threat of an assassination attempt at the moment.”

With that and a stern look in Byleth’s direction, Seteth turned on his heel to leave the Blue Lions class. For a moment, all was still after the doors were shut. No one quite knew what to say. It felt as if everyone was still reeling in shock from the notion that the girl that was stood beside Dimitri was his fiancée.

“Is that why you went to the capital, Your Highness? To get engaged?” It was Annette who broke the silence, her excitement finally bursting through her seams as she came to stand before the two of them. And without letting Dimitri answer she addressed Eve. “Hi, by the way. I’m Annette. You can call me Annie too, if you like. You said your name is Eve? That’s such a pretty name. Are you from the capital?”

“Annette.” Byleth called out to the orange haired girl.

“Oh! Sorry!” She blushed, stopping her tirade and stepping back.

“It’s alright,” Dimitri chuckled, “I can understand your excitement. And no, I didn’t travel to Fhirdiad to get engaged. I’m afraid I can’t share much about my visit, but meeting Eve was simply…”

He trailed off, turning to look at the girl beside him as he searched for the right word.

“Serendipity.” She smiled. “Dimitri and I met by accident. But it’s a long story and I’d hate to interrupt your class."

“You can chat all you like after our sparring session.” Byleth cut in once more, moving out from behind her desk. “I’d like to see where you’re at, Eve. I hope you’re not too tired from your journey to join us for training.”

“Of course not.” She smiled once more, though she turned to glance at Dimitri first. The two of them shared a look that Byleth couldn’t place, as if there was something only the two of them knew. 

But all that would have to wait. Seteth was right, Byleth couldn’t let a new student distract her from that month’s mission. Eve could wait, and Byleth could only hope she wouldn’t be a hinderance in finding out what the enemy’s real objective was.


	3. Two

All eyes were on Eve as the Blue Lions class made their way from the classroom to the training grounds. There were dozens of questions filling their thoughts, but Byleth’s instruction had been clear—training first, questions later. It was true they didn’t really have the luxury to be distracted at a time like this. After all, Lonato had been found with a letter outlining a plot to assassinate Lady Rhea after he was defeated. Even if the Archbishop wasn’t the real target, there was still clearly some kind of scheme at hand.

But this fact only raised more questions. Why in the goddesses’ name would Dimitri get engaged now of all times? Surely someone like him would realise the kind of distraction a surprise engagement would cause. It seemed more likely that Dimitri would have tried to keep Eve a secret until things came to pass so as not to distract his peers.

“Who would’ve thought Sylvain was right…” Ingrid muttered, almost to herself, as they reached the training ground and split off to retrieve their respective weapons.

“I have to admit even I’m shocked I was right.” Sylvain laughed heartily, joining her by the lances. “But I have to say His Highness really exceeded my expectations.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Ingrid grimaced at her friend.

“Do you know how many times I’ve tried, in vain, to get Dimitri to come out on the town with me?” Sylvain tossed a look towards the prince who was busy showing his fiancée around the training facility. “He could hardly look at a woman without blushing so hard his face matched my hair. And now he’s engaged to… _that_?”

Sylvain gestured vaguely in Eve’s direction; incredulity written all over his face. Ingrid hated to admit that she knew what Sylvain meant. Eve was gorgeous; yet Dimitri seemed completely at ease by her side. When she stumbled on an uneven stone, he caught her by the hand so naturally. The Dimitri they had all known would have instantly withdrawn his hand and flushed bright red, probably spouting some kind of awkward apology for touching her without her consent. But the Dimitri before them now hardly reacted to the touch, even letting his fingers linger on hers as he made sure she had properly regained her footing.

“I want to see everyone sparring, no slacking.” Byleth’s voice rang out in the hall, snapping everyone out of their thoughts. “I’m going to be keeping an eye on Eve, but that doesn’t mean the rest of you can take it easy.”

Thankfully, her students took the cue and began their training. They would no doubt still be distracted for the rest of the day. But at least now Byleth could focus on assessing Eve’s ability without worrying too much about her other students.

“Can you fight?” The stoic professor turned to her newest student, addressing her directly.

“Professor, if I may,” Dimitri cut in, “would it be alright if Eve trained with me?”

Byleth considered it for a moment, looking between the two, “No, I don’t think so. It’s important that she bonds with the rest of the class. Given the two of you are engaged, I imagine she’s plenty bonded with you at this point.”

Dimitri opened his mouth as if to object, but promptly shut it when Eve placed her hand on his arm.

“I’ll be fine, Dimitri,” she smiled, “you should go train with your friends.”

After searching her eyes for any hidden meaning behind her words, Dimitri nodded slightly. He was anxious to leave her alone, but figured she could handle herself. And if not, he would make sure to stay within earshot to swoop in to her aid.

“So,” Byleth turned back to Eve once Dimitri had left, “can you fight?”

“I can hold my own.” She answered to which Byleth frowned. Her answer was vague for a rather harmless question.

“I prefer to focus on developing my students’ strengths. What would you say you’re best with?” Byleth crossed her arms, trying to size up the raven-haired youth.

“I’m most comfortable with a sword.” Eve said after a moment of thought, pausing before adding, “dual wielding.”

“Hm. The training swords here aren’t really made for that, but you’re welcome to do what feels most comfortable for you. I want to see how you fight to see how you can improve and how you’ll best fit into the rest of the class.” The professor glanced at the wall where the wooden training swords were organised briefly before returning her gaze to Eve. “What about magic? And how are you with riding?”

“I don’t really know how I am with riding. Despite my current standing, I grew up a peasant. I’ve never had the chance to ride a horse before.” Eve tapped her index finger to her chin in thought before continuing. “As for magic, I’m decent, I guess. I only really know some very basic spells, though.”

“Okay.” Byleth nodded. “I’ll have you focus on honing your sword skills for now and we can see how you develop. It might be worthwhile for you to strengthen your magic abilities, but that can wait for now. Felix!”

Her voiced called the attention of the young Fraldarius who had been busy hacking away at a training dummy. When she beckoned him over, he stopped what he was doing with an annoyed look and came to join them where they stood.

“What?” He asked, short as ever.

“I want you to spar with Eve.” Byleth said, adding before Felix could protest, “you’re the best with a sword and I need to measure her ability.”

“Fine.” He answered, sufficiently convinced by the professor’s calculated flattery. “But don’t expect me to baby you just because you’re new.”

“I greatly appreciate it.” Eve bowed her head lightly, smiling at Felix.

“Whatever.” He grumbled as he turned his back to walk to an open area of the grounds. “Just grab a sword already.”

Without waiting for any further instruction from Byleth, Eve walked over to select two of the wooden training swords on the wall. They were heavy, certainly not made for dual wielding, but they wouldn’t be too difficult for her to handle.

As she strode over to where Felix was waiting with a grimace on his face, she recalled what Dimitri had told her about his childhood friend. Felix was short tempered, with a one-track mind focused only on becoming the best swordsman of all. And though the two had been very close as children, Felix had been cold as of late after the quelling of a rebellion that Dimitri hadn’t gone into much detail about. He was one she had to look out for. He was careful, with a keen eye. She would have to play her part most convincingly around him.

_I have to hold back. Fight well enough to not need to spend extra time with the professor. But don’t fight so well that I draw attention to myself._

Felix watched Eve carefully as she came to take her stance before him, trying to size her up. He was annoyed that he had to waste valuable training time to babysit the boar prince’s little lady. But his annoyance was balanced out by his intrigue. He was curious to know what made her so special that Dimitri would abruptly propose.

“I won’t hold back.” Felix warned as he took his stance, twirling his sword around his hand once.

Eve didn’t answer, but instead began to mimic his movements as he circled her. Felix took note of how she held her blades. It was odd, the way she held the grip firmly in her fist with the point of the blade angled back towards her elbow. He had seen a few rogues and thieves wield much shorter and lighter blades in this manner but didn’t expect it from the girl before him. With the weight and size of the training swords, she wouldn’t easily be able to turn them to attack.

Satisfied with his assessment, Felix made the first move—darting forward to attack. His speed seemed to catch Eve off guard as she just barely had time to block his blade. She gritted her teeth in effort as she put her strength behind her guard, pushing back against Felix’s blow. Momentarily, Felix was focused solely on trying to break through her defence, putting more force in his attack. As he did so, however, he neglected the fact that she was wielding two blades. He was only reminded of this as she brought her left arm up to drive the pummel of her second sword into his right cheek. And though he was quick to regain his balance from her blow, by the time he had straightened he was met with the point of her sword at the base of his throat.

There was a glimmer in her eyes at that moment that made Felix forget himself. Shock settled into his features as he fought to keep his composure. That glint in her eyes, the look of satisfaction at besting an opponent, made Felix feel as if her were staring into a mirror. In that moment, he forgot all about his goal to beat his new professor in battle. Now, his thoughts were consumed with a desire to defeat Eve. And as Eve breathlessly spoke words that fell on deaf ears, one last thought flitted through Felix’s mind.

_Of course the boar would attract someone as bloodthirsty as he is…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realise I have absolutely no experience in writing combat so I really struggled with this. Hopefully it's not too rough...


	4. Three

The afternoon sun filtered through the windows of the dining hall to illuminate the Blue Lions class as they sat and ate their lunch together. After a rather tiring training session with Byleth, they were all grateful for the hearty stew that was on today’s menu. They were also grateful for the opportunity to finally interrogate Eve and Dimitri on how their relationship came to be. While some were simply curious, others were suspicious of the whole affair and sought to poke any holes they could in their story.

“So?” Annette leaned forward excitedly, resting her elbows on the table to look with glittering eyes at Eve. “How did you two meet?”

“Oh, I bet it’s just a wonderful story!” Interjected Mercedes, smiling sweetly at the couple.

“Do you want to tell them?” Eve cocked her head to the side as she asked Dimitri, a small flush dusting her cheeks. “I must admit I’m a bit embarrassed.”

Felix narrowed his eyes at Eve as she spoke. This demure, flushed girl looked nothing like who she had been with a blade in her hand. Like this, he wouldn’t think twice about her. But she was a completely different person when they had sparred, and he was curious to find out which was the real Eve.

“It was complete happenstance, really.” Dimitri smiled at Eve with a soft look in his eyes.

 _Technically not a lie_ , Eve thought to herself, amused.

“I wanted to take a walk in the woods one evening to clear my head.” Dimitri explained to his friends. “And when I came to a clearing, I found Eve practicing her swordsmanship. In the moonlight, the way she moved was so mesmerising. I had never seen someone fight like that before.”

“When I noticed him watching, he was just standing there slack jawed.” Eve giggled. “And it’s embarrassing to admit, but no one had ever looked at me that way before. I think some small part of me wanted him to look at me like that forever.”

Felix scoffed and rolled his eyes. Perhaps he had been mistaken and imagined what had happened in the training hall.

“So, what, did you get down on one knee right then and there and ask her to marry you?” Sylvain asked, earning him a glare from Ingrid.

“Of course not!” Dimitri chuckled. “I simply asked her if she would allow me to spar with her for some time.”

“How very ‘Dimitri’.” Sylvain rolled his eyes.

“So how did sparring in the woods turn into you two getting engaged, Your Highness?” It was Ashe who spoke this time. Their love story reminded him of the knight’s tales he read where true love was just around the corner.

“Well, after that night I simply couldn’t get her out of my mind.” Dimitri admitted. “I wanted to meet her again, but had neglected to ask her name before we parted.”

“And I thought I’d never see him again.” Added Eve. “I’m just some merchant’s daughter. I never would have dreamed I caught the eye of the prince of Faerghus.”

“But the Goddess must have been smiling upon me, for the very next day I happened to pass Eve while walking through the capital.” The prince smiled at the girl sat beside him which she returned with an even sweeter smile.

Ashe glowed at their loving exchange, hoping he could one day share something like that with someone. Meanwhile, Annette was in absolute awe of their story. Even Ingrid, who didn’t care for lovey-dovey things, felt drawn in by the radiance of their romance. However, Felix, Dedue, and Sylvain were not so easily swayed. Felix didn’t want to believe that this was who Eve truly was, not to mention he didn’t trust the boar’s story for a moment. Sylvain, on the other hand, had shifted in his excitement for his childhood friend to suspicion of Eve. His Highness was naïve—especially when it came to women. And while perhaps Dimitri’s emotions were genuine, Sylvain wasn’t so sure about Eve’s. He’d met plenty a girl like her who would do anything to fall into the graces of a crest bearing noble for a chance to get ahead.

“…after spending the next few days together, I thought I had had my fun.” Eve continued her story, unaware of the scrutiny with which she was being watched. “I knew Dimitri was to return to Garreg Mach and I was sure that would be the end of our little affair.”

“I was under that impression too, at first.” Dimitri nodded in agreement. “But it just didn’t sit right with me, the idea of someone as brilliant as you putting aside your dreams because of circumstance. I wanted to bring you back to the Officer’s Academy, but just didn’t know how. And I guess all that thinking made me realise that what I was feeling for you was love; and that I would do whatever it took to keep you in my life.”

“How sweet,” Mercedes gushed, “truly a beautiful love story.”

“Thank you, Mercedes.” Dimitri bowed his head in appreciation. “Now, if you would excuse us, Seteth asked to see Eve and I in his office after lunch.”

***

Eve stood in her newly assigned quarters as she slowly and methodically unpacked what little belongings she had brought with her to the monastery. Seteth had asked Byleth to temporarily move near the other staffs’ quarters so that Eve could be in the dorms with the other students. She was grateful to have been given time to move in while the rest of the Blue Lions attended their afternoon lectures.

“Being around those buffoons is tiring.” She muttered to herself, neatly tucking away her undershirts into one of the drawers.

Dimitri had not been exaggerating when he told her his friends were a rowdy bunch. There were so many different personalities that it was hard trying to cater to each one. She had to sell a convincing performance of a love-struck fool, but what was convincing to each person was very different.

Annette, Mercedes and Ashe were easy enough. They were the ones most removed from Dimitri, not having known him before they were at the academy. Mercedes was naturally trusting and easy going while Ashe and Annette were both easily excitable. Convincing those three was no hard task for Eve. A soft smile with loving eyes was enough to make them believe she was in love with Dimitri.

Dedue was the most concerning one out of the group. His loyalty to Dimitri meant that there was seldom a time he wasn’t by the prince’s side. Aside from meaning Eve would constantly have to keep up her façade, it also meant he would have many questions as to the nature of what Dimitri had been doing in the capital in the first place.

And finally, there were the three childhood friends. They knew Dimitri best. And Eve could already sense they were picking up on a change in his behaviour. It would be crucial that they were made to believe this change was due to his love for her and nothing more. If any of them were going to pick up on the fact that Dimitri was acting, it was going to be those three.

As Eve evaluated her new classmates and finished the last of her unpacking, she heard a knock at the door. She carefully scanned her room, making sure there was no evidence of her true self, before opening the door with a smile. When she saw who was at the door, however, she allowed her smile to dissipate as she invited them inside.

“Your Highness.” She greeted him curtly, shutting the door behind him and turning to organise her books on her desk.

Dimitri watched her in silence, a bit in awe at how quickly she was able to change her demeanour. Eve was back to her stoic, withdrawn self. However, Dimitri realised now that he had been wrong in first comparing her to the professor. She wasn’t emotionless like Byleth was. And she wasn’t shut off due to any shyness. Rather, Eve was calculated and confident; she held all the cards and she was well aware of it.

“Did you have some business with me?” She asked after some time of the prince’s silence.

“I wanted to commend you on a job well done today.” Dimitri cleared his throat, remembering why he had come to see her. “I was very impressed with how different you were able to act in front of the others. When you stepped out of that carriage upon our arrival it was almost as if a completely new person stood before me.”

“You weren’t too bad yourself.” She threw a smirk over her shoulder at him. “I didn’t really think you had it in you to lie to your friends.”

“Make no mistake, it does not sit well with me to lie to those who trust me.” Dimitri shook his head and crossed his arms. “But I promised to protect you and I intend to make good on that promise. After all, a knight of Faerghus never goes back on his word.”

“How very noble.” Eve rolled her eyes, striding up to where the young prince stood. She watched, amused, as he flushed and avoided her eyes the closer she got to him.

“E-eve?” He stuttered. She almost wanted to laugh at him embarrassment.

“Well, _Your Highness_ ,” she started, grabbing the back of his neck to pull him forward so she could whisper in his ear, “if you don’t want to lie to your friends, I’m sure there’s something we could do to consummate this relationship beyond a made-up story.”

Dimitri jolted back, breaking free of her grasp and covering his face with a gloved hand.

“I-I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.” He tried in vain to hide the pink that was spreading across his cheeks and all the way up to the tips of his ears.

To his surprise, Eve burst out laughing, wrapping an arm around her stomach as she double over. And though he was quite embarrassed to be on the receiving end of such laughter, he found himself wishing he could make her laugh like that again. Eve was an enigma. On their journey from Fhirdiad to Garreg Mach she had been silent and stoic. In front of the Blue Lions she had been loving, sweet, and attentive. And now she was brazen-- confident and calculated with an air of mischief. Dimitri was curious to find the true Eve that lied somewhere between these three façades. He got the feeling none of them were who she really was. And if they were to spend the rest of their lives together, now was as good a time as any to begin getting to know her.

“Forgive me,” she said when she finally recovered from her laughing fit, “that was rather cruel of me to tease you that way. However, perhaps you should try to get used to my touch. You did well today, but I wonder how long you can force yourself to act nonchalant at our contact.”

“I’m sorry but I just don’t think I’m cut out for all of that.” Dimitri frowned.

“And you think I am?” She raised an eyebrow. “You do realise this isn’t just a short-term game, don’t you? We’re in this for the long haul. I meant it when I said you’re stuck with me for life.”

“I know that.” Dimitri replied.

“We’re going to get married and you will become the king. People will talk if the king never so much as touches his wife.” Eve spoke in hushed tones, acutely aware that above her room was Sylvain’s. “There will be even worse consequences if you can’t bring yourself to produce an heir with me. And while all of that sounds like an eventuality, it’s going to happen sooner rather than later.”

“An heir?” A gasp escaped the prince’s lips and he found himself staggering back slightly. He hadn’t considered it at all. In theory, he knew that this engagement would lead to marriage and that this act would have to continue for the rest of their lives. But he hadn’t given it much thought past that.

“I’m sorry, I truly am.” Eve’s voice took on a softer tone as she noticed the shock Dimitri was in. “That’s why I apologised earlier. I’m sure you had your own ideas about how you wanted to marry and who with. I hope you know I’m very thankful that you agreed to all this. And…”

She paused, causing Dimitri to look up at her. He was surprised to see her looking at him with a fierce determination. It was as he was watching her make a decision right in front of him.

“I will do my best to be your wife.” She said slowly, precisely. “I will do what you ask of me, but in return I need you to do the same for me.”


	5. Four

A week had passed since Eve’s arrival. She and Dimitri continued to play their parts, loving each other dearly for as long as there were eyes around to see it. And though it was all an act, both made an effort to try to know each other as the reality that this was for the rest of their lives set in.

Eve learned that Dimitri’s favourite tea was chamomile and that he taught swordsmanship to the local children in the town surrounding the monastery. She also learned that his greatest desire was to be treated as an equal amongst their peers. Often, she heard him imploring his friends to call him by his name rather than his title. It seemed to Eve that Dimitri desperately wanted to have his youth before he became king. She found herself on several occasions coming dangerously close to pitying him. But she also learned that despite whatever pain and darkness was lurking beneath the surface he was a very strong individual.

In the meantime, Dimitri had learned that Eve’s favourite tea was mint and that she loved to sneak away to the forests to read when the sun was high and warm. And though she would often become withdrawn whenever there was no one else around, he felt that she was allowing herself to open up to him more and more. Once when having tea alone in her room, she had divulged that she had a younger brother. Dimitri had never heard her mention her family before, so the passing mention in conversation had caught him off guard. There was still a lot he didn’t know about her, however. He only knew what he had been told about her situation when he promised to help her. He knew what she had done to get them into this situation, but what he didn’t know was why.

“Your Highness?” Dimitri looked up from his breakfast to see Sylvain standing beside him.

“What is it, Sylvain?” As he spoke, he gestured for his friend to join him at his table. Today he was eating alone without Eve as she had wanted to get some morning training in before classes.

“You got a minute?” The older boy asked as he sat down, an unusually serious look on his face.

“Of course.” Dimitri nodded.

“It’s about Eve.” Sylvain said after a moment of hesitation.

“What about her?” Dimitri fought to keep his voice and composure casual. Had they already been found out? Eve had expressed her worry about Felix, Ingrid, and Sylvain being the most likely to see something off with their performance.

“I’m worried about you, man.” Sylvain sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. “No offense, but you’re not exactly an expert when it comes to the ladies. And it’s just…”

“Go on.” Dimitri encouraged his friend though his stomach was churning in anxiety.

“Look, I know you like her,” Sylvain’s words let a wave of relief wash over the prince until he continued, “I’m just not sure that she feels the same. I get the feeling that she portrays a different self to each of us like she’s trying to convince us of something. The way she is with you is different from how she is with me or the professor or the knights. It’s like she’s got a version of herself for every person she talks to.”

“What does that have to do with her feelings for me?” Dimitri asked, his mind racing on how to best navigate this conversation. “She’s been very nervous about getting along with everyone here. Eve just wants all of you to like her, so she’s trying to adapt to what she thinks each of you would react positively to.”

“Your Highness, even if that’s the case has it not occurred to you that she could be doing the same to you?” Sylvain sighed. “She’s showing you the version of herself that you’ll like most. I see it all the time with the girls I meet in town.”

“I hope you’re not insinuating what I think you are about my fiancée.” Dimitri frowned.

“All I’m saying is that I hope you know what you’re getting into.” Sylvain shrugged as he stood. “There’s lots of girls out there who’d do anything to bag a crest-bearing noble as a husband. I just don’t want you falling for a lie.”

With that, the Gautier boy walked away leaving Dimitri to stew in his own anxiety. Perhaps he had missed the mark, but Sylvain was suspicious of Eve nonetheless. They couldn’t afford the extra scrutiny. And knowing him, Sylvain wouldn’t exactly be discreet about his opinions. No doubt, he had already shared his suspicions with Ingrid and Felix before even approaching Dimitri about it.

Meanwhile, Eve found herself completely absorbed in her training, oblivious to Sylvain’s conversation with the prince. Training gave her time to clear her head, to find her centre before enduring a day of pretending to be something she wasn’t. With a blade in her hand, it didn’t matter who she loved or who she was betrothed to. On the battlefield, everyone was equal.

Completely focused, she didn’t notice when the door opened and Felix slipped into the training grounds. It wasn’t until he spoke, breaking her concentration, that she noticed his presence.

“Where did you learn to fight with such a hunger?” He asked.

“What do you mean?” She turned to face him, cocking her head to the side.

“You fight like the professor—like a mercenary.” He folded his arms, scrutinising her with narrowed eyes. “Why would a merchant’s daughter ever need to fight like that?”

Eve bristled at his tone, though she made sure not to show it outwardly. He emphasised ‘merchant’ as if to prove a point. And a glint in Felix’s eyes made Eve suspect he had come to the training ground to interrogate her. 

“My father would often have to hire mercenaries to protect us from bandits as we travelled.” She shrugged. “I guess I must have subconsciously picked up their fighting style.”

Felix clearly wasn’t satisfied, and Eve wondered how long this would go on. It was dangerous that he had approached her separate from Dimitri. Together, they could weave together a coherent and consistent story. But if Felix were to approach Dimitri to corroborate her story before she could get to him, they’d be in danger.

“Train with me?” She raised an eyebrow, hoping if she spoke Felix’s language, he’d be easier to convince.

“So, tell me, then,” he said as he walked to grab a training sword, “why would you learn to fight?”

“I didn’t want to be just someone’s daughter.” She answered honestly, perhaps one of the only questions she could be candid about. “As things are, I know there’s not a lot I can be as a woman other than someone’s daughter or someone’s wife. I wanted to cut my own path.”

“Pathetic.” Felix scoffed and took his stance before Eve. “You’re just as foolishly idealistic as the boar.”

“I don’t think it’s foolish to decide my own life for myself.” Eve frowned and took the first swing, feigning a wide slash and moving in to sweep at Felix’s feet.

“Is that why you’re marrying Dimitri?” Felix easily dodged, not as easily taken off guard by Eve’s fighting as he had been the first time they faced each other. “Queen of Faerghus is definitely a cut above merchant’s daughter, but you’re still just someone’s wife.”

“I don’t care about Dimitri’s title, I-“

“Hah!” Felix interrupted her with a bark of a laugh though there was no humour in it. “You think anyone actually believes that?”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Eve asked, parrying Felix’s thrust and countering with a kick to the gut that sent him stumbling backwards. “When I met Dimitri I had no idea who he was.”

“That might be true.” Felix smirked as he regained his footing. “But I’m sure by the second time you met him you realised his position.”

Eve grimaced internally at Felix’s confident gaze. He looked so smug as if he had her completely figured out. She knew he would be dangerous, but she never would have guessed that he’d become suspicious of her this early. 

But Eve wouldn’t let her annoyance show on her face or in her fighting. She knew better than to betray her emotions to the Fraldarius boy.

“Can you honestly say that if Dimitri wasn’t the prince—didn’t have a crest—you would still have accepted his proposal?” Felix delivered his finishing blow in both their fight and their conversation at the same time, using an elaborate feign before thrusting at her with his wooden blade.

With ease, Eve saw through his tactic. She sidestepped his thrust and brought her own blade to parry his, turning it out and down to drive the tip of his sword to the ground. Swiftly, she brought her foot down to kick his wrist—forcing him to release his grip on his weapon.

“Yes.” She said in response to his question once he had been disarmed.

Felix grimaced at her. He thought he finally had an opportunity to best her in combat. Or at the very least he had hoped to expose some kind of raw emotion in her while they fought. But his scheme to goad her into anger and defensiveness with his questioning completely fell flat. If anything, she seemed extra sure of herself and her relationship with Dimitri. 

“You’re not ready to face me yet, Felix.” She said as she returned her training sword to its proper place.

“What do you mean?” There was more than a little venom in his voice.

“For as long as you refuse to see me as an equal you will never beat me.” Eve turned to face him; eyes boring into his. “It would do you well to be more direct if you truly wish to know the nature of my relationship with Dimitri. Backhanded comments and loaded questions will get you nowhere.”

With that, she left Felix to stand alone in the training ground, shock settling into his features. She had seen right through him and never once betrayed herself to him. But all this did for Felix was cement in his mind that she was not who she claimed to be. No merchant’s daughter would be this strong, this conniving. There was something more going on and Felix wanted answers.


	6. Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the super short and delayed update this time. I've been very busy, but didn't want to neglect this story.

Byleth had her plate full this moon and as the Goddess’ Rite of Rebirth was fast approaching, she could feel the pressure mounting. Eve’s arrival had only complicated things. The extra lessons she needed meant Byleth hadn’t had any time to explore the monastery to try and figure out the enemy’s true target.

Only now at the end of the third week of the Blue Sea Moon did Byleth finally have the chance to investigate possible leads. After having spoken to Dimitri and several of her other students, she found herself in the dining hall where the familiar stature of her father stood.

“What's the matter? You're running all over creation.” Jeralt regarded his child, noting the troubled look on her face. “Ah... You don't believe Lady Rhea is the real target, do you? Even so, the knights have their orders. We can't abandon our duty to guard Lady Rhea. The Goddess's Rite of Rebirth is an important event for the Church of Seiros. They say it's the day when the goddess will return to walk among us. Not too likely, if you ask me. Uh... Best if you keep that to yourself.”

Byleth nodded, knowing she need not exchange words for her father to know what she was thinking. It was odd that despite coming to Garreg Mach together and both working for the Church of Seiros, Byleth hardly ever saw her father nowadays. She had half the mind to wonder if there was some reason Rhea wanted to keep Byleth close while distancing her from Jeralt.

“There’s something else on your mind.” Jeralt said, crossing his arms. 

“It’s nothing.” Byleth shook her head.

“It’s that new student of yours, isn’t it?” The captain raised his eyebrow, turning to glance around the dining hall as if half expecting to see Eve walk in right then. “I can’t shake the feeling that I’ve seen her before.”

“She did say her father would hire mercenaries.” Byleth suggested. “We could have taken an escort job with her.”

“No, that’s not it.” Her father sighed, shaking his head lightly. “I feel like I saw her once a long time ago, far too long ago. But she’s too young; it couldn’t have been her.”

Byleth’s brow furrowed as she added this to the ever-growing list of things about Eve that didn’t exactly add up. But she had bigger things to worry about, and after speaking to Alois Byleth was sure she had discerned the enemy’s true target.

“Professor.” She found Dimitri in the Knight’s Hall; Eve glued to his side as usual.

She briefly shared with him the notes she had gathered from various people around the monastery. There were countless valuables at Garreg Mach, but there was one place that stood out the most.

“So... there is something that the church values above all else. On the day of the rite, it will be open to the public. That will make gaining entry far easier than usual. You know the place of which I speak...” Dimitri trailed off, looking at the Byleth.

“The Holy Mausoleum.” She gave a small, firm nod.

“Yes, that is the most likely possibility.” Dimitri crossed his arms in thought. “We do not know their objective, but there is a good chance that our enemy is planning to target the Holy Mausoleum.”

“The Holy Mausoleum…” Eve spoke slowly as if remembering something, the corners of her mouth just slightly forming into a frown.

“Is there something you know?” Byleth asked.

“No.” Eve shook her head. “At least I don’t think so. It’s just…it just reminded me of a story I think I once heard. It’s not important.”

“That aside,” Byleth began, “Dimitri, I’d like you to prepare the class to leave for an excursion this afternoon. There’s bandits on the outskirts of town that I’d like the class to take out.”

“Now, Professor?” There was shock in his voice.

“Eve is great in training, but she has no real battle experience. And it hasn’t been since our last mission that the class has been in battle. If it comes to it, I want you all to be prepared for a fight in the Holy Mausoleum.” Byleth glanced at Eve briefly, trying to gauge her reaction to the notion of battle. Anyone could train with a dummy but cutting through real flesh and blood was different, and Byleth didn’t want Eve’s first experience to be during an important mission.

“I’ll gather everyone right away, then.” Dimitri nodded his head in a shallow bow as the professor took her leave.

*** 

It was a short trip from the monastery to where the bandits were hiding out. On the way there, Byleth briefed her students on their strategy. Dimitri and Sylvain were to ride ahead and circle around to cut off any escape routes the bandits might try to take. Meanwhile, Felix, Dedue, and Ingrid would fight on the ground to open up a path for them. And bringing up the rear would be Ashe, Annette, and Mercedes dealing ranged attacks. Byleth herself would hang back to command her students and assist them where needed.

“Felix, I want you to take Eve with you.” Byleth added at the end of her brief.

“I can’t fight if I have to babysit.” Felix argued, tossing a wary glance towards Eve.

“Professor, I’d feel so much better if Eve could accompany Sylvain and I.” Dimitri piped up.

“Dimitri, Eve has no proper battle experience. I’m sending you and Sylvain forward because I know you can handle it.” Byleth frowned at the prince. “Besides, she can’t ride; there’s no way she could go with you.”

“Professor, Eve can come with me.” Ingrid offered.

“I want her with Felix.” She answered firmly before turning her attention back to the boy in question. “Felix, I know how often you spar with Eve. You’re well aware of her skill and the fact that you wouldn’t be babysitting. You know best out of the class how she fights, so I’m trusting you to help her navigate the battlefield.”

“Just don’t get in my way.” Felix half muttered at Eve as they arrived outside the bandit camp.

“Felix doesn’t like me very much, does he?” Eve glanced at Dimitri from the corner of her eye as the others prepared for battle.

“He’s suspicious of you.” Dimitri frowned before adding. “And so is Sylvain. But I don’t think he dislikes you. Felix can be rough around the edges, but I think he actually respects you. Training is how he shows his true feelings, and with how often he trains with you I’d say he at least doesn’t mind you.”

“I suppose that’ll suffice.” Eve laughed bitterly. “I’ll guess I’ll see you on the other side.”

“Be careful, please.” Dimitri said softly. But it was less a warning for her physical safety and more a warning not to give too much away in this first battle. She would have to fight to survive, yes, but not so well as to bring any more questions about her origins to light. “This’ll be over quickly.”


	7. Six

Clearing out bandits was a routine enough mission for the Blue Lions at this point. The professor often had her students spending weekends out in little skirmishes. They were low-risk fights that helped the class bond as allies and grow in their strength. Byleth was not only an incredible fighter, but she was a master tactician who had an eye for her students’ talents. And as the Blue Lions took on the nest of bandits, their professor’s plan worked just as expected.

Dimitri and Sylvain had made quick work of circling around and cutting off any escape routes. And with Felix, Dedue, and Ingrid pushing forward, they pulled off a most effective pincer attack.

Despite his protests, Felix made sure to keep Eve close. While he made quick work of his enemies, he watched her closely, trying his best to reroute any of her would-be attackers towards him. But as they fought Felix became very aware that his assistance was unneeded.

He watched as Eve cut through the bandits without a hint of emotion on her face. There was no remorse at taking a life, no disgust at the blood and gore. She was just as strong as her training would suggest, weaving her way between enemies without hesitation. And as Felix watched on, he noticed a glimmer in her eyes much like the one he had seen the first day when they sparred. It was what had drawn him to her, and now he could see it was more than just a glimmer—it was a flame. There was no better word to describe what he saw in Eve as she fought than bloodlust. And Felix realised that the reason he was so suspicious of her and her relationship with Dimitri was because her emotions never touched her eyes. But now, there was only emotion in her eyes. Fighting made her feel alive—much like it made Felix feel alive.

This revelation, however, only served to bring up more questions than it could have potentially answered. If all this was true, why was she with Dimitri? Did the boar prince know about that fire in Eve’s eyes? What were Eve’s motives in coming to the Officer’s Academy? And why did he even care?

While questions buzzed around in his head, Felix found himself distracted. And it wasn’t until he heard his name shouted over the sound of steel hitting steel that he realised he had messed up.

“Felix!” It was Eve who was calling out to him, panic in her eyes as she dove towards him.

She swiftly shoved him out of the way of an incoming blow, moving to block it with her own sword. But she had been too slow-- more focused on Felix than his assailant-- and the enemy’s dagger found purchase, slicing across her left clavicle. Eve winced in pain as blood bloomed from her wound. Despite her injury she slashed at the bandit before her, nearly cutting him clean in half.

“Are you okay?” There was fear in her voice as Eve turned to face Felix. Her eyes flitted over him hastily and he saw relief wash over her as she noted he had not been injured.

“Worry about yourself you idiot!” Felix hissed in anger as she staggered slightly. Luckily the fighting seemed to have died down now and there were only a few stragglers left for the class to round up.

“You should,” Eve touched her wound lightly, her hand coming away sticky with her own blood, “be more attentive.”

With that, she collapsed forward into his arms. At first the wound she sustained didn’t seem all that serious, but now that he was closer Felix could see just how deep it was. She was hurt—badly—and it was his fault. He had foolishly gotten distracted and Eve was the one accepting the consequences.

“Mercedes!” Felix called out, hoping someone could come to help Eve. “Professor!”

But it was Dimitri who came, riding over to where Felix held Eve.

“What happened?” Dimitri’s face was pale as he dismounted and rushed over to them. “Felix, you were supposed to watch over her!”  
“You think I don’t know that?” Felix shot back, anger rising in the back of his throat. “Just get her to Mercedes, she’s bleeding a lot.”

Felix watched as Dimitri took Eve and hoisted her unconscious form onto his horse as gently as he could. And before he knew it the two of them were racing off to where Mercedes was, leaving Felix to stew in his own conflict.

Why did Eve take that blow for him? It wasn’t like he had been particularly kind to her; he hadn’t done anything that would encourage her to put her life on the line for him. And if the persona she showed in front of the Blue Lions was all fake, then why did she seem so genuinely scared when he was in harm’s way?

“Dammit!” Felix cursed at his feet. Above all what bothered him most was that he had allowed Eve to distract him on the battlefield. It was unlike him for his focus to waver in a fight, so why had his thoughts been so easily diverted by this girl?

* * *

Eve awoke in her own room with a start. She tried to sit up, but a sharp pain on her left made it impossible on her own.

“You’re awake.” It was Dimitri who spoke, standing from where he sat at her desk. “You lost a lot of blood, but Manuela patched you up. She said you’d be fine in a couple days as long as you keep it clean and use the salve she made when you redress it.”

He motioned to a jar of mysterious goop that sat on Eve’s bedside table as he came over to help her sit up. His eyes were troubled, clouded with worry. Eve wondered why Dimitri would harbour that kind of emotion for her. If she died, he was free. He wouldn’t have to marry her anymore, wouldn’t be trapped because of her actions.

“Why am I here?” Eve asked instead of voicing her true concern. “Shouldn’t I be in the infirmary?”

“There was an accident at training with a spell gone awry.” Dimitri explained. “Manuela needed the beds and said all you really needed now was some rest. So, I took you back here and have been keeping an eye on you.”

“Thank you.” Eve said slowly, still unsure why the prince would care so much about her injury.

But before she could consider asking Dimitri anything, a loud, persistent knocking was heard at the door. Dimitri cast a questioning glance towards Eve as if to ask if he should answer it. Neither of them had time to say anything, however, before Felix came bursting into the room, all but kicking her door down.

“Felix?” Dimitri’s brow furrowed and he subconsciously stepped in front of Eve as if to protect her from this intruder.

“Why did you do that?” Felix pushed past Dimitri with ease to stand above Eve, anger raging in his eyes.

“Do what?” She strained. “Save your life?”

“I don’t need someone to save me.” Felix spat. His anger came as a surprise to Eve and she couldn’t figure out why he was so mad. “I could have handled it on my own, but you went and got yourself needlessly injured.”

“Felix, I-“ Before Eve could answer, Felix cut her off.

“I almost would have commended you for how you carried yourself in batter.” He crossed his arms, regarding her with a look she couldn’t quite place. “But only an idiot throws themselves at a blade like that.”

“Is that what you came here to do?” Eve asked softly, her tone surprising both Felix and Dimitri who had expected her to retort with similar venom. “I don’t need your thanks, but I don’t need whatever this is either. I’m tired, Felix, just let me rest. I don’t know why you hate me, but can’t it wait until after I’ve healed?”

“Hate you?” Felix recoiled, losing momentum in his anger. “What made you think I hate you?”

Once again, Felix found himself wondering why he cared. This interaction was going all wrong. He had wanted to make sure Eve was okay after being unable to find her in the infirmary. And he had wanted to ask her why she saved him. But all the confusion her actions caused morphed into anger as he tried to speak to her.

“I-I don’t hate you.” He said, looking away. “I just don’t get you. If you think I hate you why would you save me like that, then?”

“I just did what was right.” Eve said deliberately, exchanging a look with Dimitri.

“What was right?” Felix’s brow furrowed. “Dying for someone you barely know—someone you think hates you—was right?”

“It was you.” Eve spoke without thinking, letting her true reasoning come to light. “I’ll always put my life on the line for you.”

“Eve!” Dimitri’s voice was panicked as he shot a pointed look at her.

“What the hell is that supposed to mean?” Felix asked, more confused than he had been when he first arrived.

Rather than answer, Eve regarded Felix with soft eyes. There was something in that look that seemed to break past Felix’s defences. With just that one glance, he felt as if he had been kicked in the gut. But just as quickly as that look had come, it was gone as she turned to look up at Dimitri with determination.

“I want to tell him.” 


	8. Seven

“Absolutely not.” Dimitri’s eyes were wide, filled with worry.

“Tell me what?” Felix’s question fell on deaf ears as his eyes flitted between the two of them.

“He has a right to know.” Eve retorted, drawing herself up as tall as she could from her bed to look at Dimitri defiantly. 

“We have strict orders.” Dimitri shook his head, though he softened slightly. He understood why Eve wanted to tell Felix the truth, but they had no way of knowing what the consequences of it would be.

“Orders? What is this about?” Felix tried to cut in once more, but to no avail.

“You got to tell Dedue.” Eve shot back, remembering how Dimitri had convinced Seteth to allow them to tell his vassal. 

“That’s different.” Dimitri replied. “It would have been impossible to hide it from Dedue.”

“Different how?” Eve’s voice was beginning to raise. “You know that Dedue trusts you enough to not have asked any questions if you told him you couldn’t say anything about us. You just wanted to tell him.”

“There’s no telling what Seteth will do if he finds out you told someone.” Dimitri tried to plead with Eve, though he could see in her eyes she had already made her decision. 

“Then Seteth doesn’t need to know.” She said sternly before her voice softened. “I want to tell him. Please, Dimitri. Just let me tell him.”

“Tell me what?” Felix barked in frustration, finally calling the attention of the couple before him.

“Eve,” Dimitri started, but decided against whatever he was going to say and sighed in resignation, “…go ahead.”

“Felix, I know you’ve had your suspicions about me.” Eve began slowly, deliberately, wondering just how much of the truth she should reveal at this point. “And…they’re not completely unfounded.”

“What do you mean?” Felix brows furrowed as he took on a defensive stance, all too aware of Dimitri’s burning gaze on him.

“Dimitri and I are not in love.” Eve glanced at her fiancée as she said this.

“I could have guessed as much.” Felix half smirked. 

“But our engagement is real.” She continued. “We’ve been arranged to marry by order of the Church of Seiros. I’m sure you know how close the ties are between the Kingdom and the Church.”

“What’s that got to do with me?” Felix crossed his arms. “I don’t care if you get married or not.”

“Why would the Church of Seiros want the future king of Faerghus to marry some merchant’s daughter?” Eve asked softly, watching Felix’s reaction intently.

“You’re not who you say you are.” Felix had suspected as much but hearing her admit it somehow wasn’t as satisfying as he had thought it would be. “And that has something to do with me somehow.”

“Correct.” Eve nodded. “I’m not a merchant’s daughter. Who I truly am is not what’s important at the moment. But what does matter is the answer to your question.”

“Why would you sacrifice yourself for me?” Felix couldn’t help feeling frustrated. It was as if he was trying to solve a puzzle that Eve had all the pieces to. He didn’t like being in the dark; didn’t like being spoon-fed information at her leisure.

“I serve House Fraldarius.” Felix froze at her words.

“What?” He shook his head lightly, wondering if he had misheard her.

“House Fraldarius has protected me for many years. In exchange, I protect the head of the house and his lineage.” Eve explained, though it left Felix no less confused.

“Protect you from what?” Felix asked. How did she fit into all of this? And why, if she indeed served his house, did he never recognise her?

“Eve.” Dimitri’s voice was cautious, a warning not to give too much away.

“There’s no point in half-assing the truth now, Dimitri.” She looked at him and for the first time he felt like he saw a true glimpse of her. Her eyes looked so trapped, bound by orders from the church. Telling Felix this sliver of the truth was the only freedom she could afford right now.

“Very well.” He nodded, deciding to let Eve tell all that she wanted to.

“I…” She trailed off, taking a breath as if trying to figure out what exactly to say. “I bear a rare crest. One that makes me valuable to the church and its enemies alike.”

“A crest?” Felix’s brow furrowed.

“It’s not that I would go against the church, but I didn’t want to be their pawn.” Eve continued. “Despite that, I still wanted to use my crest for good. So I found myself in Fraldarius territory where I promised to use my crest to protect the head of the house for as long as they would keep me hidden from the outside world.”

“What kind of crest is that damn valuable?” Felix asked to which Eve’s face took on a complicated look.

“It would be easier to just show you.” She said, motioning for Dimitri to come to the side of her bed. 

“You should be resting, Eve.” Dimitri said gently. “Are you sure you’re up for it?”

“I’ll be fine.” She dismissed his worries with a wave of her hand. “Just hand me that knife over there.”

Dimitri reached to where she had a bowl of fruit resting on her windowsill. Inside, a small paring knife sat nestled between some apples. Felix watched intently as Eve took the knife from Dimitri and cut a small, shallow slit into the centre of her left palm. Suddenly, the tell-tale glow of a crest being activated illuminated her face and a symbol Felix had never seen before shone. Right before his eyes the cut on her hand disappeared completely only to appear on Dimitri’s outstretched left hand which he had taken his glove off of.

“W-what?” Felix was taken aback, stunned speechless.

“My crest allows for transference of injury.” Eve said as she reached for the salve and clean bandages that were meant for her on her bedside table. “I suppose that’s the easiest way to describe it.”

Felix watched as she bandaged Dimitri’s wound that had once been hers. How was such a power possible? And if there was a crest like this that existed, why didn’t he know about it? Eve said she served house Fraldarius, but he genuinely couldn’t conjure any memory of her from before this moon.

“How did you end up here then?” Felix asked. “How does all of this lead up to where we are now?”

“I did what I promised to do.” Eve smiled bitterly into Dimitri’s palm. “But I wasn’t careful enough.”

“What happened?” Felix watched her intently, trying to discern anything he could.

“My crest doesn’t just work for shallow wounds.” She looked up at him after she finished bandaging Dimitri’s hand. “Surely then the church wouldn’t take such an interest in me.”

“What do you mean?” Surely, she wasn’t suggesting what Felix was thinking. That would be impossible. There had to be limits to the power of crests, even if they were supposedly gifted from the goddess.

“I can save someone who has been killed.” Eve’s voice was nearly a whisper now, so low Felix almost couldn’t hear her. “I can only do it right at the moment of death, and it takes pretty much all of my energy to do it, but it’s within the realm of the power of my crest. But my crest’s power is equivalent exchange. That means someone else must give their life for me to raise one.”

“Impossible.” Felix breathed.

“Last moon there was an accident. A section of wall came crumbling down and your father was crushed.” Eve continued on. “I kept my promise to him and used my crest to revive him—at the cost of a servant’s life.”

At that last part, Eve cast her eyes down. She seemed genuinely remorseful at the loss of another life. 

“It’s the hardest when it’s an accident.” She sighed. “If it was an assassination attempt then the obvious answer is to trade the assassin’s life for Rodrigue’s. But…well, I had to keep my promise. I had to save Rodrigue.”

“And in return my fool of a father sold you out to the church.” Felix grimaced. 

“No.” Eve’s head shot up and she shook her head earnestly. “It wasn’t Rodrigue’s fault. There was a representative of the church there. They reported to Seteth what had happened. If it weren’t for Rodrigue I’d probably be locked up as the church’s prisoner somewhere.”

“That’s why I went to Fhirdiad.” Dimitri spoke up from where he stood at Eve’s bedside. “Rodrigue had written me a letter imploring me to accept this engagement he had arranged.”

“My father arranged your marriage?” Felix asked with incredulity.

“He did it to protect me.” Eve replied. “He knew that once the church knew about me and my crest, they’d want to have me close. But he couldn’t bear the idea of me being locked away. Afterall, it was my promise to him that put me in this situation.”

“So he convinced the church to allow me to marry her.” Dimitri continued on. “That way she would be closely linked to the church where they could keep an eye on her. But she would also be able to live her life relatively freely.”

“The church claims they just want to keep me safe, but I know that they just want to keep my crest close in case anything happens to Lady Rhea.” Eve shook her head. “Rodrigue knew I didn’t want to be a pawn, that I wanted to cut my own path in my life. He told me that marrying Dimitri would be the only way I could keep some modicum freedom.”

“So that’s why you’re here now.” Felix spoke slowly, trying to wrap his head around all this new information.

“And that’s why I saved you.” Eve smiled gently. “Because my promise to House Fraldarius still stands.”

“We’ve been put under strict orders not to tell anyone the truth about Eve or her crest.” Dimitri added. “Seteth said that especially now that enemies of the church are taking up arms, we can’t have anyone knowing that Eve has such a valuable crest. It would make her a target.”

“I would appreciate if you didn’t share this conversation with anyone.” Eve said, staring holes into Felix.

“Why go through all of this?” Felix had just one last question on his mind that he couldn’t leave unasked. “Why not just disappear? Run away. You could have avoided all of this, so why stay?”

“I wouldn’t expect you to understand.” Eve sighed. “But Fodlan is my home. And I have a promise to keep to your family. I already failed you once; I couldn’t just disappear.”

Failed him how? Felix looked on as Eve battled with some wave of emotions within her. He just didn’t understand her. Why would she have such staunch loyalty to his family? Even though he now knew more about her than he ever had, Felix felt even more perplexed by Eve. She had a powerful crest like none other he had ever seen, and for some reason she had pledged only to use that crest for House Fraldarius. And when the church discovered her, rather than run she was roped into an arranged marriage with Dimitri at his father’s behest. None of it made sense. There was something else tying Eve to Fodlan; and there was something more to the story that Eve was keeping to herself.


	9. Eight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter this time. I'm trying to update more often, though, so hopefully more to come soon.

Dedue entered the greenhouse as the sun was setting and the glass structure was ablaze with orange light. The long day of classes and training was done, and he finally had a moment to slip away and tend to the flowers while Dimitri was taking a break at the sauna. Around this time there was seldom any other person at the greenhouse, so Dedue was surprised to see a figure kneeling before the Duscur blooms he had so carefully raised.

He was even more surprised when he approached the figure and discovered it to be Eve, sitting on her knees and humming an unfamiliar tune to herself as she gently caressed the leaves of the plants. There was a gentle peacefulness about the scene that almost made Dedue feel as if he were intruding on a private moment.

“I’ve always loved the flowers of Duscur.” Eve said softly, though it still startled Dedue.

“I don’t mean to intrude.” He said and bowed slightly to apologise.

“Duscur was so beautiful.” She mused, eyes still locked on the flowers before her.

“Duscur is no more.” Dedue said, matter of fact.

“I wish I had been there.” Eve still didn’t look up at him. And though she didn’t specify where she meant, Dedue knew exactly what she was talking about.

“No, you don’t.” He shook his head. “It was a bloody massacre.”

“I should have been there.” Dedue picked up the slightest waver in Eve’s voice as if she were fighting with all her might not to let her emotions show. “I could have…could have…”

“There is no guarantee that any lives would have been spared had you been there.” Dedue came to kneel beside Eve to water the plants of his homeland.

“Maybe so.” She said bitterly. “But every time he looks at me, I see it in his eyes.”

Dedue didn’t answer. He knew she was talking about His Highness. And Dedue couldn’t deny that the thought had also crossed her mind. Eve had kept her crest a well-guarded secret for all this time. But had she been in the right place at the right time, if she hadn’t been determined to hide her power, perhaps the unrest in Faerghus could have been avoided. 

“I know he doesn’t mean to do it.” Eve sighed, continuing despite Dedue’s silence. “But it’s like every time he looks at me, he sees what could have been. There’s so much pain in those eyes that realise if only I had been there his father would still be alive. It’s only a matter of time before Felix starts looking at me that way too.”

“Felix?” Dedue turned to look at Eve, puzzled. 

“I told him.” She sighed again.

“Does His Highness know?” Dedue asked.

“He was there.” She answered before turning fully to face Dedue. “Do you blame me?”

“Blame you for what?” His brow furrowed.

“I’ve hidden my crest all this time because of my own selfish desire.” Eve’s gaze dropped to her hands in her lap. “Had I not kept it secret, had I been there in Duscur, things would have been so different. Lambert, Glenn… Lives could have been spared; Duscur could have been spared. And I know Dimitri knows all this. And whether he realises it or not, his gaze is so accusatory.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Dedue answered after a moment of thought.

“Doesn’t matter?” Eve echoed in astonishment.

“Whether or not things would have been different,” Dedue stood from his crouch, “doesn’t matter.”

“You’re telling me you don’t ever think of what could have been?” Eve stood as well, her joints popping and Dedue wondered just how long she had been sat there. “You’re telling me you don’t look at me think that if I had just been in the right place at the right time all of that pain Dimitri tries so hard to hide would be gone?”

“What’s done is done.” He replied flatly. “You can’t change that. Like I said, there’s no guarantee your crest would have changed the outcome.”

Eve stared into Dedue’s eyes for several moments, searching them for any words he might have left unspoken. He looked back at her, unwavering. It was true he was very aware of the implications her crest held, but he tried not to think about it. His Highness had given him a new purpose in life, so Dedue focused solely on that. It was no use thinking about Duscur or dreaming about what could have been. Anything that distracted him from serving His Highness didn’t matter.

“I wish Dimitri felt that way.” Eve finally broke eye contact and wrapped her arms around herself. “I can’t stand the way he looks at me.”

“His Highness does not blame you.” Dedue shook his head lightly, thinking back to when Dimitri had explained their situation to him.

Dedue had been vehemently against the whole arrangement initially. Eve was a stranger with an unknown power that had somehow managed to stay hidden for all this time. She was calculating, intelligent, and powerful. Should she decide to turn against Dimitri, she would not have too much trouble doing so.

But Dimitri had insisted that things would be okay. He spoke of how Eve had saved Rodrigue, how she had a staunch loyalty to House Fraldarius that she would never betray. He spoke of her resilience and of her vow to try her best to be a good wife despite the circumstances. His Highness wholeheartedly believed that Eve was a good person, trustworthy. And perhaps his subconscious was aware that Eve could have saved his father in Duscur, but Dedue was sure he did not consciously despise her for it.

“Do you think he’ll ever stop looking at me like that?” Eve asked earnestly, again allowing Dedue to see a sliver of sincerity in her expression.

“That is up to him.” Dedue answered. 

“I don’t want him to hurt anymore, Dedue.” She whispered as if afraid he might actually hear her. “He’s been through enough, and all I do is keep those wounds open.”

“We cannot change how people look at us.” Dedue knew this all too well. He heard the whispers, saw the looks of distrust. 

“You’d be surprised.” Eve exhaled in a humourless laugh. “I’ve lived so many lives at this point it’s hard to remember who I am. All I do is change how people look at me.” 

At that Dedue frowned. There was much he did not know about Eve. Even with the information he had been given, it didn’t seem like anyone knew anything about her truly. She had practically materialised into existence just a few weeks ago. And while he did not necessarily trust Eve, Dedue couldn’t deny that she had come into His Highness’ life from a trustworthy source. Dedue had a suspicion that if anyone knew more about her, it would have to be Lord Rodrigue.


	10. Nine

Dimitri found himself unable to sleep as he lay in his bed, tossing and turning. This moon had been a tumultuous one and it wasn’t even over yet. He found himself praying to the goddess that he and the professor were wrong about the Holy Mausoleum, and that the Rite of Rebirth would come and go without incident. But he knew that wouldn’t be the case. Ever since that fateful day that he, Edelgard, and Claude had met the professor, it had just been one thing after the next.

And then there was Eve who had somehow become a part of all this. Deciding that he wasn’t going to get any sleep that night, Dimitri got out of bed and walked to his desk. There, he pulled out the letter that had started them down this path. Back when he received it, he had no idea how much would change. And it was all because of this simple letter that Eve’s life had become entangled with his.

_Dimitri,_

_I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing to ask that you come see me in Faerghus immediately. There is an urgent matter I must discuss with you. I apologise for the abrupt manner of this letter and the lack of details I am providing. Unfortunately, the matter at hand is of the upmost secrecy. I must ask that you do not tell anyone about this trip. I have already made the necessary arrangements with Seteth to allow you leave. Should anyone ask, you are simply going to Fhirdiad on official business._

  * _Rodrigue_



When he had received the letter, Dimitri had been concerned to say the least. He didn’t have much contact with Rodrigue after coming to the Officer’s Academy, so it was already unusual to have received a letter from him. And it was very unlike Rodrigue to be so vague, so Dimitri knew that something was amiss. But Dimitri knew he could not refuse such a request, so he spoke to the professor and Seteth and departed for Faerghus as soon as he could.

Upon his arrival, Dimitri had been relieved to see that Rodrigue was in good health and that things in Fraldarius territory seemed to be peaceful. So, at the very least, he had not been asked there because of anything too serious—or so he had thought. Dimitri could still so vividly remember that afternoon when Rodrigue introduced him to Eve.

* * *

“Dimitri, my boy!” Rodrigue exclaimed, greeting the prince with a smile.

“Rodrigue, it’s been too long.” Dimitri bowed, relieved to see the Fraldarius Lord appeared healthy. His worst fear had been that Rodrigue wrote because something had happened to him.

“You’ve grown into such a fine young man, Your Highness.” Rodrigue beamed as if Dimitri were his own son. “How’s Felix doing? He’s not giving you too much trouble, is he? That boy can be so stubborn sometimes.”

“No, he’s nothing of the sort.” Dimitri shook his head with a good-natured smile. “He seems to have taken to our new professor quite well.”

The two of them chatted casually as Rodrigue led the prince inside. They came to an office Dimitri had never been to before that was in a secluded corner of the Fraldarius estate. And when Rodrigue closed and locked the door with a firm thud, Dimitri knew that whatever he had been called here for was serious.

“Your Highness, I’m sure you’re aware I didn’t just call you here for a visit.” Rodrigue’s voice turned serious as he motioned for the prince to sit as he took his own seat at the table in the centre of the room. “And I want to apologise again for all of the secrecy.”

As Dimitri sat, he finally noticed there was another person in the room. She appeared to be a servant, dressed in a plain smock and holding a pitcher of water. Dimitri found himself mesmerised by her as she strode forward to pour a drink for the two men. Her steps were graceful and silent, almost as if she was hovering just above the stone floor.

Following the prince’s gaze, Rodrigue spoke up once more.

“This is Eve.” He motioned to the servant girl. “She’s trustworthy, so you need not worry about her hearing this conversation.”

“Of course.” Dimitri nodded. He wasn’t going to admit that the issue hadn’t even crossed his mind.

“In fact,” Rodrigue continued, “Eve is the reason I’ve asked you here.”

Dimitri looked once more at the girl named Eve and was startled to find her emerald eyes boring back into his azure ones intently. Her gaze was steady, unwavering, and completely removed. She regarded him without a single emotion; there was nothing in her eyes that gave away what she was thinking.

“I’m afraid I don’t quite understand.” Dimitri frowned as he turned back to face Rodrigue.

“Your Highness, I’m afraid I must ask you to do something that would change your life forever.” There was regret in Rodrigue’s eyes, as if it pained him to even ask Dimitri whatever it was that he wanted to ask.

“Please, Rodrigue.” Dimitri said. “I am always willing to help you however I can. What is it you require of me?”

“I want you to marry Eve.”

Dimitri was in shock as Rodrigue explained the situation starting all the way back when Eve had first come to House Fraldarius for help. She had a never before seen crest that could raise the dead, something Dimitri would have dismissed as a silly rumour had it not come from someone like Rodrigue. And as even further proof Eve had demonstrated the power of her crest right before his eyes by transferring a small cut from Rodrigue to her own body.

“I don’t believe it.” Dimitri found himself muttering aloud.

“It is quite unbelievable, Your Highness.” Rodrigue agreed. “I never would have believed it if I didn’t see her power with my own eyes.”

“Forgive me, Rodrigue, but I fail to see how this leads to marriage.” Dimitri’s brow furrowed. He understood that Eve was powerful and that she had saved Rodrigue, but what he didn’t understand was why it mattered now if people knew about her crest.

“The Church of Seiros has asked that Eve leave House Fraldarius to serve Lady Rhea instead.” Rodrigue explained. “They say they want to protect her from those who would seek to exploit her crest, but I’m afraid if she goes to Garreg Mach she will never see the sun again.”

“Surely the church doesn’t mean to take her as a prisoner.” Dimitri balked at the idea. Rodrigue was a devout man, so it puzzled the prince that such words would come from him.

“No, of course not.” Rodrigue shook his head. “But I cannot bear the idea of Eve being locked away even if it is for her safety. She would be forced to live a life of secrecy, only ever allowed to use her crest for the Archbishop.”

“Was she not also living a life of secrecy here?” Dimitri asked. It felt odd to speak about Eve as if she wasn’t standing just beside them, however she seemed to show no interesting in taking part in the conversation.

“Perhaps,” Rodrigue glanced at the girl in question, “however it was on her own terms. She was the one who asked to be a servant and serve the house as anyone else would. Eve is in this situation because she saved my life. I simply could not live with myself if I repaid her by allowing her to be taken away against her will. That is why I must ask you accept this proposal. I assure you Eve will serve you well. She is trustworthy and loyal, and I would feel a great comfort knowing she is by your side to protect you.”

Dimitri turned the idea over in his head as Rodrigue looked on expectantly. He knew that it was more likely than not that he would never have the freedom to choose his own bride. And the idea of arranged marriage had always been a rather bitter taste in Dimitri’s mouth. He didn’t like the idea of some poor girl being stuck with him against her will. If he were to accept this arrangement that Rodrigue had convinced the church to agree to, he could at least know that he was helping someone keep their freedom rather than taking it away with his marriage.

And all of this was in addition to the fact that Rodrigue so desperately wanted to help Eve. Dimitri still wasn’t sure what kind of relationship Eve had with the Fraldarius family, but it was clear that both parties meant a lot to the other. He knew nothing of Eve other than her crest, but the prince of Faerghus knew Rodrigue as a surrogate father. If Rodrigue wanted to save Eve and Dimitri was the only one who could do it, then he knew exactly what had to be done.

And whether Dimitri wanted to admit it or not, he had his own ulterior motives to wanting to help Eve. He hadn’t been able to save his father or his stepmother or Glenn, and now their voices haunted him. Why did he survive when so many had died? Unbeknownst to even himself, Dimitri was seeking something, someone, that could give him permission to continue living. If he could save Eve, be a good husband and a good king for her, perhaps then the voices that haunted him would allow him to exist in peace.

With all this in mind, Dimitri trained his gaze on Rodrigue as he made his decision.

“I accept.”

* * *

* * *

Felix stared at his ceiling in frustration, willing himself to find sleep as he lay in bed. There was too much on his mind, though; he couldn’t get his thoughts to quiet long enough for him to fall asleep.

With a sigh, he hoisted himself out of bed and slipped back into his clothing save his academy uniform vest. Perhaps a walk in the fresh air would serve to clear his mind and bring about sleep. And if not, there was always the training grounds where he could tire himself to the point of exhaustion and force his body to sleep.

Silently, Felix wandered around the monastery in the cool night air. It was a cloudless night and the stars above shone brightly. It was almost too quiet, and Felix once again found himself plagued by his own thoughts. He hated it—hated that he was unable to keep his emotions in check. Felix always strived to be level-headed and objective. He wanted to be the best swordsman and that would take unwavering focus. But now his mind was filled with thoughts of Eve, of how she came to be at the academy.

As his mind wandered to think of Eve, Felix’s feet moved without his awareness until he came to a halt before her door. He was surprised that he had managed to unconsciously find his way to her room. And he was even more surprised to see the faint glow of candlelight coming from the crack beneath her door.

Impulse getting the best of him, he reached out to knock on the solid wood. He heard a rustling behind the door and watched the sliver of light as a shadow approached.

“Hello?” Eve opened the door a crack and peered out at Felix, surprise settling into her features as she recognised him. “Felix. Come in.”

She opened the door wider and stepped back to invite him inside. Tentatively, he shuffled into her room and looked about.

She had several candles lit around the room, illuminating her quarters with a soft glow. Her wide windowsill was covered with cushions on one half where a book lay open face down. A still steaming cup of tea beside the book told Felix she had been up reading rather than sleeping.

“You should be resting.” He said, perhaps a little more accusatory than he had meant to be.

He turned to look at her and flushed slightly when he noticed she was only in her bedclothes. Her nightgown with its thin straps and flowing material exposed more of her than he had ever seen. And despite the fact that she had invited him inside in the first place, Felix felt as if he shouldn’t be there.

“Forgive me.” He averted his gaze when he noticed he was staring and covered his face with his hand.

“There’s nothing to forgive.” She glided on silent feet past him to pick up the book she had left out, placing a ribbon to mark her spot before snapping it shut.

“Loog and The Maiden of Wind?” Felix raised an eyebrow at her as he read the gilded lettering on the cover.

“Ashe lent it to me.” She said as she turned to place it safely with the other books on her shelves. “He caught me sneaking away to read in the forest and was excited to share book recommendations.”

Felix watched her as she retrieved her cup of tea and brought the steaming liquid to her lips. His expression clouded when he noticed the red line that marred the skin over her left clavicle. He had never seen the wound she had earned because of him other than that first time on the battlefield. And though he was glad to be able to see it was healing well, the sight of it still boiled his blood.

“Why would you sacrifice yourself for me?” Felix asked angrily.

“Not this again.” She sighed and placed her tea down. “We’ve been over this, Felix.”

“I still don’t get it, though.” Felix shook his head. “Why would you care so much about me or my father?”

“Your father protected me.” She answered.

“But he failed you.” Felix retorted. “So why do you have to keep your side of the bargain now?”  
  


“Even if your father had betrayed me and cast me out from House Fraldarius, is it so hard to believe that someone would care whether or not you died?” Eve shot back. “Would you not sacrifice yourself for your men on the battlefield?”

“No, as a matter of fact, I wouldn’t.” Felix hissed. “You’re just like everyone else, thinking that sacrificing yourself is the best thing you can do. The best thing you could do is keep living and fighting. Dying uselessly doesn’t help anyone.”

“He didn’t die uselessly.” Eve’s voice was soft, so soft he almost didn’t hear her.

When he turned to look at her, she had her back to him. And though during training and on the battlefield she had such a commanding presence, now she looked so small-- even standing at her full height several increments higher than him.

“You sound just like my father.” Felix said bitterly. “Next you’re going to say he died with honour like a true knight.”

“He was slaughtered.” She whipped around to face him, her eyes filled with a flurry of emotions Felix couldn’t put definitions to. “He didn’t throw himself upon an enemy blade to save someone else. He didn’t sacrifice himself. He died in an ambush that left all but Dimitri dead.”

“He could have saved himself if he wasn’t so worried about what was honourable.” Felix crossed his arms.

“Is that what you think?” Eve asked with a furrowed brow.

“He was the strongest person I knew.” Felix replied. “But he still died.”

A look of understanding flashed in Eve’s eyes and for some reason it enraged Felix. It was as if she had made some kind of conclusion about him from just a few words.

“Just because you are strong doesn’t mean you can’t fall.” Eve said with a shake of her head. “I have known so many strong soldiers in my lifetime, but they all fell eventually.”

“Tch.” Felix clicked his tongue and turned away from Eve to glare at the door.

He wasn’t sure why he had come to Eve’s room, but this certainly wasn’t it. Why was it that every time he spoke to her, he ended up arguing with her? It was as if he were incapable of remaining impartial as long as she was involved.

He just didn’t get her. Why would one flimsy promise make her so devoutly loyal to his house? She could have run away as soon as the church discovered her. She didn’t have to risk her life to save him on the battlefield. And even now she didn’t have to humour him. She could easily send him out from her room, and he wouldn’t have blamed her. Yet she allowed him to berate her, listened when he shot accusations her way.

“Felix.” She called out to him softly, reaching to grab his sleeve tentatively. “I don’t mean to upset you.”

He down at her hand on his sleeve then up to her face. What was it about this girl? Why did she consume his thoughts like nothing else?

“I’m not upset.” He said. “I just don’t understand why you think the way you do.”

“Why does it matter?” She asked with a small smile, releasing her hold on his sleeve. “Why do you care what I think?”

“Why?” He recoiled at the question. It was a valid one, though. Even he didn’t really understand why Eve’s opinions held so much weight in his mind.

“Yes,” she came to stand in front of him, “why does it matter to you what I think?”

“Because I-“ Without thinking Felix found himself reaching forward to grab Eve’s shoulders, pulling her into him and crushing his lips onto hers. He held her there for just a moment, mind racing and his reason screaming at him to pull away. And when his reason won out over whatever impulse was controlling his body, Felix ripped himself away from Eve, turning on his heel without hesitation to storm out of her room and leave her standing there, speechless.


	11. Ten

Felix wandered into class early in the morning after having been unable to get even a moment of rest the night before. All he could do last night was lay in bed and let his mind replay what had transpired in Eve’s room. Not only was he completely mortified, but he still didn’t fully understand why he even did it. All he could hope for was that Eve wouldn’t change the way she treated him. He just wanted to pretend it never happened and move on.

At least that’s what he thought he wanted. When he came into the classroom and saw Eve going about her business as usual it irked him. Was she really that unaffected? Had she too spent a sleepless night thinking about what he had done, or had she simply moved on with her life as soon as he left? Some small part of Felix had hoped that just a portion of Eve’s mind would be occupied by him the way his was consumed by her.

“How did you sleep last night, darling?” Dimitri asked, and Felix’s ears pricked up to hear Eve’s response.

“I fell asleep as soon as we retired after supper.” She lied with the sweetest smile.

“That’s good.” Dimitri sighed with relief. “Your body needs rest after your injury. It’s unfortunate that we need every blade we can spare for our mission, otherwise I would have requested the professor let you sit this one out.”

“I’m okay, Dimitri.” She comforted, leaning forward to place a small kiss between his furrowed brows to which Felix bristled. “Manuela said I’m already fully healed. It’s just the scar that’s left.”

“Would it kill you to let me worry about you?” Dimitri took her hand in his with a light-hearted laugh. “Though I must say I’m surprised you’ve healed this quickly. I saw the wound after it had been cleaned, and it was no mere scratch.”

“I guess I’m a fast healer.” Eve shrugged noncommittally.

Felix felt his hands ball into fists beneath his desk as he watched their exchange. Not even the slightest quirk of an eyebrow gave Eve away. She didn’t seem bothered at all by last night’s events. Although, appearances weren’t much when it came to Eve. After finding out the truth about who she was, Felix learned not to trust who she pretended to be around others.

“I’m so happy for His Highness.” Ingrid’s voice startled Felix from his own thoughts.

“Oh yeah?” Felix asked, uninterested. Ingrid might not know, but he knew it was all a sham.

“He looks so happy with her around.” She said tenderly. “At first I had my suspicions. And I do hate to admit it, but I can’t help worrying that Sylvain is right about Eve. But at the same time I find myself thinking that even if Sylvain is right, I don’t think I’d mind as long as she keeps making His Highness so happy.”

“Foolish.” Felix huffed.

“Felix, I know you don’t believe in love,” Ingrid began, exasperated, “but just look at how different Dimitri looks with her. That glimmer in his eyes, the way he looks at her when he thinks no one else can see, he absolutely adores Eve. I’ve never seen him so happy.”

As Ingrid spoke, Felix once again turned his attention to where Eve and Dimitri sat at the front of the class. Eve was turned almost all the way around in her seat to talk to Ashe who was sitting behind her. He could pick up just enough to know she was talking to him about Loog and the Seven Maidens. But what drew his eye away from Eve was Dimitri, turned in his seat so he could look at his fiancée. He was watching her with such care that it almost made bile rise in Felix’s throat. Dimitri looked nothing like the boar he knew him to be. He looked at Eve as if she was the answer to a question he had been trying to answer all his life. And for some reason this enraged Felix. What right did the boar prince have to have that look in his eyes? What made him think he could look so tenderly at someone with the trail of blood he left behind him?

“He loves her.” Felix murmured aloud as he finally recognised what that sickening look in Dimitri’s eye was. Dimitri had fallen in love with his fake fiancée like the fool he was, and Eve was none the wiser. She seemed to think it was all part of the act, and everything she did only made Dimitri fall further into her façade.

But Felix didn’t have any more time to consider this revelation as Byleth strode into the Blue Lions’ classroom with four unfamiliar figures behind her.

“Class, I’d like to introduce you to the Ashen Wolves.” Byleth said, motioning to the four strangers she had brought into her classroom. “Dimitri, Ashe, I’m sure you two will recognise them from when you both assisted me in Abyss.”

“Abyss? I thought that place was only a rumour. It’s real? Why were His Highness and Ashe in Abyss?” Murmurs rippled through the room as everyone assessed the newcomers.

“For the rest of you, this is Balthus, Hapi, Constance, and Yuri.” Byleth motioned down the line as she introduced them. “I have asked the four of them to join the Blue Lions class as well as assist us in this month’s mission.”

“Yuri?” Eve’s head snapped up at that name and she met the gaze of the lavender haired boy who was already intently staring at her.

“Is something the matter?” Dimitri asked, noticing Eve’s reaction.

“It might be nothing.” She muttered softly as the professor continued to outline the plan for their upcoming mission and how the Ashen Wolves would play a part. “But Yuri knows me.”

“How much does he know?” Dimitri asked in hushed tones, his grip on Eve’s hand tightening in anxiety.

“Nothing really.” She answered. “He knows I’m not a merchant’s daughter, though. And he’s suspicious by nature, so he’s going to want to pry.”

“We’re already at risk after telling Felix.” Dimitri whispered. “We can’t afford to let another person find out.”

“Oh, believe me, I have no intention of telling him anything.” Eve shook her head, finally tearing her eyes from Yuri’s gaze to look at Dimitri. “But I will need to talk to him before he has the chance to open his mouth about us meeting previously.”

Dimitri nodded and the two returned their attention to the professor. The Ashen Wolves’ appearance had not changed the strategy much, but with the Rite of Rebirth nearly upon them it was just as important to refresh their plan.

Like many of Byleth’s previous battle strategies, it was a simple one that would play off of the strengths of her students. They would stake out the Holy Mausoleum during the Rite of Rebirth and hope that that was the most they had to do. But if it came to it, as it most likely would, they had mapped out the Holy Mausoleum’s interior to devise a plan. Due to the crypt’s layout, Byleth had formed two groups out of her students to take either side of the large aisle that went down the middle. The left side would be led by Yuri, Eve, and Dedue. They would be supported by ranged attacks from Ashe, Hapi, and Annette coming up behind them. And taking the rear would be Dimitri. On horseback, he could quickly move to wherever his support was needed as well as clear up any stragglers left behind. The right would be led by Byleth herself with Felix, Ingrid, and Balthus. Coming up behind them would be Mercedes and Constance with Sylvain bringing up the rear on horseback.

Dimitri glanced at Eve as they reviewed the teams Byleth had allotted. He could tell it made her anxious that Felix would be clear on the other side of the battlefield from her. If something happened, there was no way she would be able to make it in time to help him. For his part, Dimitri was relieved that Felix wouldn’t be in their group. With Felix, Eve would only be distracted. Her mind would be on protecting Felix rather than the mission.

“He’ll be okay, you know.” Dimitri tried to comfort Eve once class had broken.

“Can you blame me for being worried?” Eve frowned slightly at the prince.

“Think of how many missions we’ve been on, skirmishes we’ve fought, before you arrive.” Dimitri said. “He’s been just fine through all of those, hasn’t he?”

“That may be so,” Eve sighed, “but the one time I’ve fought with you all he nearly got himself killed.”

“I will say it was very unlike him.” Dimitri cupped his chin in thought. “I’ve been meaning to ask him what distracted him so much on the battlefield.”

“You really think he’d tell you even if you asked?” Eve laughed lightly. “I’ve not known the two of you long, but it doesn’t take a fool to notice there’s some kind of animosity on his end.”

“Well, my fiancée nearly died because of his actions, so I think I have a right to know.” Dimitri said plainly as if it should have been obvious to which Eve found herself chuckling, earning her a frown from the blonde boy. “What’s so funny?”

“You’re just so earnest.” Eve’s smile was a genuine one which brought a blush to Dimitri’s face. “It’s refreshing, and…sweet.”

Dimitri’s blush deepened and crept all the way up to the tips of his ears. Sure, Eve had peppered him with loving words plenty of times since they had arrived at the monastery, but there were always people around to hear. This time, though, they were alone in the classroom after everyone had left to get their lunches. And unlike any of the other times, Dimitri could tell Eve was being truthful. This wasn’t the Eve who was a merchant’s daughter who fell madly in love with the prince of Faerghus, this was the Eve who teased Dimitri behind closed doors and allowed herself to laugh with real emotion in her eyes.

“Come on,” she smiled at him as Dimitri tried to regain his composure, “let’s go get something to eat.”

“Right.” Dimitri nodded, clearing his throat and standing.

As the two of them stepped out of the classroom, Eve noticed a shadow in the corner of her eye. Leaning against the wall just next to the classroom door was Yuri, watching the couple closely with arms folded and a smirk painted on his face.

“Dimitri, why don’t you go on ahead, my love?” Eve turned to Dimitri after noticing Yuri.

“Of course.” Dimitri nodded, understanding in his eyes. “I’ll grab some food for you.”

“Thank you.” Eve smiled and watched him leave.

Once Dimitri had walked out of view, she trained her gaze onto Yuri whose own eyes had never left her. Without a word, she jerked her head in the direction of the classroom and walked inside, trusting that Yuri had followed.

“Yuri Leclerc.” She sighed once she heard the tell-tale sound of him closing the doors behind them. “It’s been quite some time hasn’t it.”

“A year?” He came to stand before her, his smirk still firmly in place. “Maybe two?”

“I heard what happened with Aelfric.” Eve said. “I’m sorry.”

“You know, I heard the little prince had found himself a commoner wife, but I never would have imagined it was you.” Yuri stepped forward so the two of them were mere centimetres apart.

“Fodlan’s pretty small, huh?” Eve answered, looking down at Yuri with a challenging glint in her eye.

“I wonder,” Yuri reached forward to let his index finger trail down Eve’s jaw, coming to a stop beneath her chin and pulling it forward, “does the little prince of Faerghus know how sweet you taste?”

“Don’t be crass, Yuri.” Eve pulled her chin away with a small chuckle.

“Riddle me this, though.” Yuri walked a few paces away, folding his arms as he spoke. “Why are people saying you’re a merchant’s daughter? You’re an orphan, you don’t even have a father much less a father who’s a merchant.”

“It’s one thing for the future king of the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus to marry a regular commoner.” Eve said with a sigh. “It’s the kind of progressive step that wouldn’t upset too many people. But a servant? The nobles of the Kingdom would lose their minds if they knew I was a servant.”

“What about your lord who you so faithfully serve?” Yuri asked with a hint of sarcasm.

“Lord Rodrigue has given me his blessing.” Eve answered curtly.

“Hm.” Yuri hummed. “And what’s to say I won’t tell others the truth about you?”

“Because you have nothing to gain from it.” Eve said confidently. “Yuri, you’re clever and calculated, but you’re not an agent of chaos. You wouldn’t expose me just for the fun of it.”

“Is that so?” Yuri quirked an eyebrow up at her.

“I don’t claim to know you, but I do know that you like to keep your cards close to your chest.” Eve looked at him without a wavering gaze. She wasn’t particularly sure he wouldn’t tell everyone that she had been a servant of House Fraldarius. But either way she wasn’t really bothered as long as he didn’t know or expose the real truth about her. “I’m not saying you’d never expose me, but you wouldn’t do it now when you’d not benefit from it.”

“Perhaps you’re right little lady.” Yuri smirked once more, opening the door to the classroom and motioning for her to exit first. And as Eve stepped past him he whispered just into her ear, “I hope for your sake you are.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've made Yuri a little bit of a bastard but that's because I love my little sewer rat boy. And I know it's taken me 10 chapters but I promise the actual holy mausoleum mission is going to happen soon!


	12. Eleven

The Blue Lions gathered in their classroom before dawn even broke on the day of the Goddess’ Rite of Rebirth. Last minute adjustments were being made as they reviewed the plan and made sure everyone was prepared. There was a sort of buzz in the air of anticipation and anxiety. Everyone was on edge for the day ahead of them. At best, they had an inkling of their unknown enemy’s objective. At worst, they were headed blind into a situation of life or death.

Eve sat towards the back of the classroom, away from the others. She watched as Dimitri pointed something out to the professor on the map in front of them. He seemed so different when preparing for battle—like a true leader. Eve had her doubts about Dimitri as king. He was deeply affected by his past no matter how hard he tried to hide it from others. And Eve was worried that in the long run it would affect his ability to lead. But when she saw him like this, she wondered if she had been wrong. Perhaps his unwillingness to lose anyone again was what made him stronger. He wasn’t the type of leader to believe that human lives should serve as sacrifices for the greater good.

“Eve.” Felix had approached Eve while she was deep in thought, calling out to her when she didn’t even notice him standing beside her.

“Oh, Felix.” She blinked away her thoughts and looked up at the Fraldarius boy from where she sat. “Hello.”

“Hello?” He squinted at her. “Is that all you have to say?”

“Is…there something else I should say?” Eve asked, perplexed. Once again, Felix seemed upset with her for a reason beyond her knowledge.

“Are we not going to talk about it?” He sat on the desk before her, blocking her view of Dimitri.

“Talk about what?” She asked innocently. Truthfully, she knew exactly what he wanted to talk about. But if he wanted to talk to her about it, Eve was going to make him be up front about his feelings.

“The ki-!” Felix’s voice raised in frustration before he cut himself off, only continuing after he lowered it to a whisper. “About…what happened in your room the other night.”

“Do _you_ want to talk about it?” Eve asked, cocking her head slightly to look in Felix’s eyes as he refused to meet her gaze.

“Like hell I want to talk about it.” He scoffed though a blush started to form on his cheeks.

“Then I think this conversation is done.” She said, moving to stand up and join the rest of the class.

“No!” Felix objected in a hushed tone, quickly reaching out to grab Eve’s wrist and pulling her closer to him. “I-I want to talk about it.”

“That’s all you had to say, Felix.” Eve let her tone soften.

“Don’t patronise me.” He hissed, still gripping her wrist. When Eve winced at his tight hold on her, Felix released her quickly. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m always like this with you.”

“It’s okay, Felix.” Eve smiled slightly. “I didn’t address what happened before now because I thought you might not want me to. I know you have a lot of mixed feelings about me and you don’t particularly like me, so I knew it was something you did in the heat of the moment. You don’t need to apologise or even talk about it if you don’t want to.”

Felix was about to protest when he realised that of course Eve would think he didn’t like her. He had been nothing but rude to her, accusatory even. He doubted her, argued with her, and the only reason he had put up with her in the beginning was because she was an interesting sparring partner. And even now when all he had wanted was to have a civil conversation, he had immediately gotten irritated.

“Having a secret meeting here are we, little lady?” Another voice asked before Felix could figure out how to vocalise what he was thinking to Eve.

“Yuri.” Eve regarded the lavender haired boy, clearly unbothered by the interruption. “I thought I told you to stop calling me that.”

“Hm, I don’t think I will.” Yuri teased with a smirk and a wink, causing Felix to bristle.

“Is there something you want?” Eve asked. “Or did you just come over for a social visit?”

“The professor has something for you.” He jerked his head towards the front of the class.

“We’ll talk later, Felix.” Eve said with a pat on his arm as she left with Yuri.

“I’d be careful with that boy if I were you.” Yuri whispered as they walked away.

“Felix?” She frowned slightly. “You know I serve his family.”

“I’m just saying if you’re trying to move up in ranks by marrying the prince, canoodling with the Fraldarius heir may hinder your progress.” Yuri shrugged.

“Canoodling?” Eve laughed. “Besides, I’m not marrying Dimitri for status.”

“Whatever you say, little lady.” Yuri shrugged again as they re-joined the rest of the class.

“Eve.” Byleth looked up at the new arrivals. “I have these for you.”

The professor held out two short swords for her to take. Each simple blade was about the length of Eve’s forearm. They were light, yet sturdy and had a dull edge unlike the other swords Eve had used so that she could hold them with the tip pointed towards her elbow without harming herself.

“I had the blacksmith forge these the other day.” Byleth said once Eve had inspected the weapons. “You said you were most comfortable with dual wielding, so I thought it’d be best if you had the proper weapons for that.”

“Thank you, professor.” Eve nodded.

“And it came with this.” Byleth handed over a leather belt that had a scabbard on either side.

Eve took the belt and fastened it around her waist, sliding the two swords into their respective scabbards at each hip. And for a moment, as Eve inspected her new weapon and holster, each of the Blue Lions saw a flash of something unknown in her eyes. It was as if she was reliving something that had happened a lifetime ago; as if now, prepared for battle, she was reminded of someone she used to be.

“We should head to the cathedral now.” Byleth said firmly.

As the class gathered and moved out together, Dimitri found his way over to Eve and took hold of her hand. She looked at him with puzzlement in her eyes as he regarded her with a look she couldn’t place. He seemed worried, but not necessarily about the mission itself.

“Is something wrong, my love?” Eve asked and immediately noted it was the wrong thing to say. Dimitri frowned at the affectionate name, though just barely perceivable.

“No.” He sighed, dropping her hand as if it were hot coals. “Nothing you need to worry about, darling.”

“We’ll have tea tonight.” She said, though she wasn’t sure he was listening. “And if you feel ready to tell me what’s bothering you, I’ll listen. Not as your fiancée, but as your friend.”

Dimitri didn’t reply, but instead addressed the rest of the class as they came to a halt just inside the cathedral, “The Goddess's Rite of Rebirth is finally here. Let's move ahead with our plan.”

“Leave it to me.” Dedue nodded firmly. “Professor, are you in as well?”

“Of course.” Byleth nodded, sure as always which helped bolster her students’ spirits.

“We've narrowed down our objective...kind of. So, let's show everyone that we can carry out our duties better than anyone!” Ingrid said with a clench of her fist, determined.

“We’re counting on you, professor.” Dimitri nodded in agreement.

At that point, Seteth and Flayn found their way to the class and Seteth found a way to berate the new professor as usual. However, Eve was too distracted to pay attention to the exchange. Things weren’t right and Eve could feel a pit of anxiety forming in her stomach. Dimitri was acting odd and it was clearly related to their arrangement. Meanwhile, there was no telling what was going on with Felix. He seemed to dislike Eve very passionately, and yet he kept going out of his way to speak to her. And on top of all of that, Eve couldn’t shake this feeling that things were all about to go terribly wrong.

There was no time for worries, though, because as the Blue Lions piled into the Holy Mausoleum, they were greeted by unexpected guests.

“It is as we suspected. The enemy is within.” Dimitri said as they came through the entrance.

“Those Central Church dastards have spotted us... Buy me some time while I open the seal on the casket!” A cloaked mage at the back of the mausoleum ordered the soldiers that surrounded him when he noticed the Blue Lions.

“The enemy is after the casket of Saint Seiros. Do they intend to steal her bones? We must defeat those enemies before they open the casket.” Dimitri called out.

“Follow the plan.” Byleth nodded in response. “Move quickly and stop that mage from opening the casket.”

With that, the students broke out into their formations, following the professor’s orders. There weren’t many foes, but they were some of the strongest the class had ever faced. A mysterious Death Knight appeared, but he appeared to take no interest in inciting any fighting. As such, Byleth ordered the students to steer clear of the knight and focus solely on getting to the mage at the casket.

“Yuri!” Eve called out, helping the leader of the Ashen Wolves dispose of his assailant as she came to his side. “I’ve got a plan, but I need your help.”

“Hit me.” He said through gritted teeth as the two of them fought back to back against the oncoming foot soldiers.

“You see those mages blocking the stairs up to the casket?” Eve said, using one blade to block an attack and the other to strike back.

“What about ‘em?” Yuri asked.

“On my signal, I want you to cast cutting gale straight down the middle of them.” Eve replied as she ran her blades through yet another enemy. “It should give me a big enough opening to run past them and up to the casket.”

“Are you insane?” Yuri whipped around, but not before knocking a mage unconscious with the pummel of his sword. “Even if you make it up there, what are you going to do on your own?”

“I won’t be on my own.” Eve replied. “I’ve been paying attention to the professor on the other side. She’s nearly to the top. I want to give her support once she gets there.”

“Fine.” Yuri sighed in agreement. “Just don’t get yourself killed.”

Eve nodded and the two of them continued to press forward along with Dedue. She watched the battlefield, hoping for the best moment to break through.

“Now, Yuri!” She shouted when she saw the opening she needed, sprinting forward towards the stairs.

Eve didn’t dare look back, only trusting that Yuri had taken her cue. And as she dashed forward, a gust of wind passed her and forced the mages on the stairs to part. It was all Eve needed to push through just in time to see Byleth approaching the mage at the casket as well.

But they were too late. The mage had already successfully broken the seal on the casket and was pushing the heavy lid off. As Eve prepared herself to support the professor, the two of them watched as the mage pulled a sword out of the casket.

“No.” Eve gasped, astonished.

Byleth didn’t hesitate and charged forward, disarming the cloaked mage and catching the odd sword as she struck it out of his grasp. Eve watched on as Byleth unthinkingly used the strange weapon to block a magic attack from the mage. The weapon glowed as it cut through the spell and there was no doubt in Eve’s mind that this sword was exactly what she thought it was. All she could do was watch on as Byleth cut down the mage without hesitation.

“That sword is…I see. What a pleasant surprise.” Eve whipped around just in time to watch the mysterious Death Knight teleport away as Dimitri rode up to where she and the professor stood.

“He got away... We have no choice but to let them go for now. Professor... The way that sword is glowing. I wonder...” Dimitri didn’t get to finish his thought as he was interrupted by Eve’s scream.

“Felix!” She stood in horror, looking at where Felix stood with a sword plunged through his chest.

“No!” Ingrid shouted.

“Felix!” Sylvain also called out, trying his best to cut through enemies and make his way up to his friend.

Byleth was stunned, faltering in activating the divine pulse that Sothis’ power allowed her. Meanwhile, Eve was sprinting forward, catching Felix before he could even fall to the ground. Without thinking, Eve pulled the sword from where it was buried in Felix’s chest. But despite her efforts, Felix was unresponsive—his blood soaking through her clothing.

“Eve, no!” Dimitri called out, much to the astonishment of the other Blue Lions, with panic as she lifted her shaking hand over Felix’s lifeless body.

Eve simply looked at Dimitri with tortured eyes as she activated her crest, the glow illuminating her face. The others watched on as Felix’s assailant dropped to the ground without so much a scratch on his body. And as the soldier crumpled into a heap devoid of life, Felix’s chest wound closed before their very eyes. He remained unconscious, but the healed wound and the sudden reanimation of his breath made it abundantly clear to everyone there that Eve had done the impossible. Somehow, beyond the comprehension of all but Dedue and Dimitri, Eve had traded the soldier’s life for Felix’s.

* * *

Felix began to float his way to consciousness as he became aware of a voice and a hand running through his hair. He couldn’t open his eyes; his body still not as awake as his mind was becoming. But now, he could make out the voice that he heard.

“Open the door and hide away; never give in to the call of yesterday.” It was Eve’s voice that was singing softly as she stroked his hair.

Her fingers running through his loose locks felt calming and Felix almost wished that he could stay there forever.

“I’m in a lot of trouble, Felix.” She muttered softly and Felix could feel her take his hand in hers. “Everyone is angry with me: Rhea, Seteth, Dimitri, Dedue.”

She sighed softly and Felix wondered if he should fight to open his eyes or remain still as she spoke.

“But I don’t regret it.” Eve continued. “I was there this time; I couldn’t do nothing. I don’t think I could have faced Rodrigue if I let both of his sons die.”

 _So that’s why she did it._ Felix found himself thinking bitterly. Of course she didn’t save him because she cared about him. She did it for her stupid duty to his father. And like everything else in his life, of course it had to do with Glenn.

“It’s more than that, though.” She sounded troubled, and Felix could almost picture the small frown on her face. “I don’t know what it is, but I’m drawn to you, Felix. You don’t really care about me, and I guess I find that refreshing.”

Felix could hear Eve chuckle at her own words. She withdrew her hand from his and he found the sensation of his empty hand far too cold for his liking. But soon she brought her hand back up to his hair, combing through the lengths as she absently hummed to herself.

“I feel terrible for Dimitri, you know.” She sighed. Felix found himself annoyed that she would bring up the boar prince. “Right now, he’s with Seteth trying to figure out their damage control plan. He got tied up in all this and has to suffer all because of my selfishness. All he’s done is be gracious and try to help me, and this is how I repay him.”

 _Shut up about the boar._ Felix thought angrily.

“I promised him I’d be a good wife.” Eve’s fingers in Felix’s hair faltered as she spoke. “But what have I done to do good on that promise?”

 _Shut up about him!_ Felix fought for consciousness.

“I don’t know what to do, Felix.” She sighed again, and finally Felix was able to open his eyes and force himself into full consciousness.

“Just shut up.” Felix answered, reaching out to grab Eve’s face and pulling to his.

This time, Felix was acutely aware of what he was doing. This kiss was intentional, deliberate. He wasn’t harsh like last time, and he wasn’t going to let Eve think this was just a spur-of-the-moment impulse. This time, he meant it. And even if he didn’t know what exactly it was he meant, all that mattered to him was that Eve knew this was intentional.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this has taken so long to update! I've been busy this past weekend and on top of that I had some trouble figuring out how to write this chapter. I hope it's okay, though! Hopefully next chapter up much sooner.


	13. Twelve

“What an interesting development.” Sothis’ voice filled Byleth’s mind as she sat alone in her quarters.

“Eve…” Byleth muttered aloud, thinking back on what had transpired earlier that day in the Holy Mausoleum.

“To think that this little peasant girl would have such power.” Sothis continued. “And did you notice the symbol when she saved that boy’s life?”

“It must have been a crest.” Byleth said as she remembered the mysterious shape.

“Certainly not any crest you or I have seen.” Sothis replied.

“If I learned anything from meeting the Ashen Wolves, it’s that there are definitely crests that have been hidden from existence.” Byleth pondered this.

Byleth hadn’t given it much thought when she first met her four new students in Abyss. But now looking back on it, it wasn’t outside the realm of possibilities that there were more than those four crests lost to time. However, crests like that of Aubin and Timotheos had been referenced before in history books, they were simply believed to have been bloodlines that were lost. Eve’s power, though, was not like anything Byleth had read about while trying to learn more about the church she now served.

“One thing is for certain, though.” Sothis interrupted Byleth’s thoughts with one of her own. “If that girl was lying about having a crest, there is no telling what else she has been hiding.”

* * *

“Did you not try to stop her?” Seteth berated Dimitri as they stood in his office, the door firmly shut.

“It all happened so fast, Seteth.” Dimitri bowed his head. “I was too far away to stop her.”

“Her crest is dangerous!” Seteth slammed his hands on his desk in a rare outward display of his anger. “There is no telling what the enemy will do with knowledge of her power. Her actions have put a target on Garreg Mach. And she has the nerve not to be here? Where is she?”

“Eve is in the infirmary.” Dimitri answered. He knew she was there watching over Felix. He had been the one to propose that she stay there while he handled Seteth. From the limited interactions between the two that Dimitri had witnessed, he knew Eve would only serve to exacerbate the situation if she spoke to Seteth.

“We will have to think of something to say.” Seteth began to pace the length of his office with his arms folded behind his back while Dimitri watched on. “It will do no good for the people to believe the future King of Faerghus is a liar. Not to mention it would look bad for there to be a crest the Church of Seiros was unaware of.”

“Am I still to marry Eve?” Dimitri asked.

“Of course.” Seteth answered quickly. “The only thing worse than the situation we are in is if people found out this was all and elaborate ruse.”

For some reason beyond him, this came as a relief to Dimitri. While he hated seeing the way Eve looked in the rare moments she allowed him to see her true emotions, Dimitri found himself unwilling to let go of her.

“We tell them the truth, then.” Dimitri offered to the distraught Seteth. “At least part of it.”

“Do elaborate.” Seteth prompted.

“We say that Eve is under the protection of the Church of Seiros.” Dimitri said. “And that a marriage was arranged between her and I by the church. And the reason we couldn’t tell anyone it was arranged was to protect her identity.”

“I suppose that could suffice.” Seteth said after a moment of thought. “I shall arrange our next steps with the Archbishop.”

“Thank you.” Dimitri bowed.

“Though I would implore you to remind Eve that her actions will not be without consequences.” Seteth added. “I am sure the Archbishop would like to have a word with her.”

* * *

The remainder of the Blue Lions sat in their classroom in silence, stunned beyond belief. They were worn out from their battle, but all any of them could do was sit and think about what they had just witnessed.

“Mercie?” It was Annette who was the first to break the silence, her timid voice echoing in the stone room. “Did- did Eve really bring Felix back to life?”

She was the first to say what everyone else was thinking. There was a lot magic and the power of crests could do, but none of them could have ever imagined raising the dead could be possible.

“It does appear like that’s what happened…” Mercedes trailed off, an unusually serious look on her face.

“I’m just wondering if His Highness knew about this.” Ingrid muttered.

“I’m glad Eve could save Felix’s life,” Ashe started with a downcast look in his eyes, “but I can’t help feeling betrayed. Is that selfish of me?”

“I don’t think so.” It was Hapi, of all people, who answered with a shrug of her shoulders. “I don’t know much about whatever’s going on, but it sounds a lot like this Eve girl has been lying to all of you.”

“Why would she hide it?” Sylvain asked no one in particular. He hadn’t interacted with Eve much, but he hadn’t been kind to her when he did. He had been accusatory and downright venomous, not to mention he didn’t even attempt to hide his belief that she was only marrying Dimitri for his crest. She could have put a stop to all of that if she just told Sylvain she had a crest, but instead she insisted on keeping it secret.

“I’m curious about what kind of crest has the power to resurrect the dead.” Yuri chimed in. “Don’t you think that’s the kind of power that would be talked about in legends and history books? Very peculiar indeed.”

* * *

“Rhea, what did you do to the professor?” Eve and Lady Rhea were the only two beings in the Archbishop’s quarters where she had been called after Felix left the infirmary.

“You are not in any position to be asking questions right now.” Rhea was angry, angrier than she would have ever allowed herself to be seen by others. “You defy my every word!”

“I saw the Sword of the Creator, Rhea.” Eve stepped forward, emboldened. “The crest stone is missing, yet the professor was able to wield it. So, I’ll ask again: what did you do to her?”

“I finally had you back.” Rhea sighed. “After losing you for so many years you were returned to me. And this is how you repay me? I just want to protect you, Eve.”

“You did to the professor what you wanted to do to me all those years ago, didn’t you?” Eve stepped even closer, nearly toe to toe with the Archbishop. “You don’t care about me, Rhea, so stop pretending. All you care about is that I don’t use my crest against you.”

“You will not speak to me in that tone of voice.” Rhea’s gaze turned harsh. “You should be grateful I agreed to Lord Rodrigue’s proposal. And you should be kissing the ground Dimitri walks upon because if it wasn’t for him you would never be afforded the luxuries you have now.”

“Is that a threat?” Eve hissed. “You can’t lock me away now, Rhea. People have seen me; people know I exist. If you hide me away now there will only be questions.”

“I won’t hide you away, child.” Rhea shook her head. “Because that is exactly what you want. I will make sure you will always be seen, always held accountable. There’s no more running away for you.”

“You want to talk about accountability?” Eve challenged. “Then why don’t you tell me what you did to the professor?”

“I don’t have to tell you anything.” Rhea retorted.

“Rhea, I don’t want to hate you.” Eve shook her head. “But I simply cannot agree with the actions you take in the name of the Goddess. There’s a reason I’ve kept my crest away from you all this time.”

“I would do anything for the Goddess.” Rhea said with fire in her eyes. “Don’t stand there and act like you know anything about her will.”

“I know you would, that’s what terrifies me, Rhea!” It was clear to Eve that there was no changing the Archbishop’s mind, but she still couldn’t help but argue. “Where do you draw the line? I am terrified that you will one day commit atrocities and see no wrong in your actions because you ‘did it for the Goddess’. And I don’t want to be complicit in any of that.”

“You disrespect the Goddess who gave you your power.” Rhea shook her head.

“I wish I never had this power.” Eve spat back, turning to leave the Archbishop’s chambers but pausing to turn back to add, “And I wish I never came to Fodlan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the very short chapter this time around. Just wanted to have a lil insight into the various reactions to Eve. More to come soon. Hope you enjoyed!


	14. Thirteen

A deafening silence filled the Blue Lions’ classroom. It was their first class after their mission in the Holy Mausoleum just two days prior, and it was the first time anyone was acknowledging what had happened there.

Eve had asked to make an announcement before class which Byleth had allowed. Now, she stood in front of the professor’s desk with her head bent and her hands clasped together. Dimitri stood at her side, a comforting hand resting on the small of her back.

She tried and stopped several times to begin to speak. Everyone else was quiet, waiting anxiously to hear what she had to say. Would she explain herself? Were she and Dimitri even really in love? Who was Eve? Meanwhile, Felix was intrigued by how believable a performance Eve was putting on, and he found himself wondering just how much of the truth she would share.

“I’ve deceived all of you.” She said finally, eyes still downcast at the floor. “And worst of all I’ve sullied the Blaiddyd name by making you all believe Dimitri is a liar too.”

She paused and finally looked up, scanning across the room with what anyone would have thought was remorse in her eyes.

“So, I want to take this time to come clean.” Eve said firmly. “I will tell you the truth about who I am, and I will answer any questions you may have. I know none of you have any cause to believe me now, but I just want to make things right.”

Eve paused once more and turned to look at Dimitri this time. Felix could see the adoration in the prince’s eyes as he looked at Eve. And though it made his blood boil, Felix couldn’t help but admit that perhaps the boar’s foolish love for Eve was what would save her here. There were no holes to poke in his loving act because it wasn’t an act. And by proxy this gave Eve’s own story a sense of credibility. Whether or not she returned his feelings, Dimitri loved and trusted Eve which meant she was trustworthy at least to some degree.

“Dimitri and I did not meet on accident, but we are engaged by order of the church.” Eve started slowly. “You all saw the power of the crest I bear. Were it to fall into the wrong hands, chaos would ensue. Archbishop Rhea has therefore kept me under her protection to shield me from those who would seek to harm me.

“Yeah, what exactly _is_ the power of your crest?” Sylvain interrupted. “I don’t think any of us really know what we saw back there.”

“Sylvain, let her finish!” Dimitri tried to protest before Eve put up her hand to stop him.

“It’s okay, Dimitri, he’s right.” She smiled softly before continuing. “My crest can transfer bodily harm. You saw the greatest extent of my crest’s power: exchanging one life for another to resurrect the recently deceased.”

“Recently?” Sylvain snorted. “How recent is ‘recently’ when it comes to dying?”

“Sylvain.” Ingrid warned with a sharp glare.

“Alright, alright.” He put his hands up in surrender. “I’ll stop interrupting.”

“But my crest also works for things like small cuts and bruises or injuries earned in battle.” Eve continued, ignoring Sylvain. “I’m sure you can all imagine the kind of target this would put on me, especially after recent events. So that’s why I’ve been living under the protection of the Church of Seiros and Lady Rhea.”

“S-sorry to interrupt,” Ashe raised his hand tentatively as he spoke, “but how does that become you and His Highness getting married?”

“After the Tragedy of Duscur, the church has been considering the idea of a union between me and His Highness.” Eve spoke carefully, making sure she got the details of their new lie just right. “So that if anything ever happened to Dimitri, I could use my crest to save him. Dimitri is the only heir to the throne, if he were to die the Kingdom would succumb to mayhem.”

Felix was almost in awe at how well Eve spun her lies, and how Dimitri stood beside her through it all. Had he not known the truth, he would have absolutely believed all that Eve was saying. The way she spoke was as if she were confessing something, as if she was finally choosing to come clean. But it was all just another lie.

“With Lonato’s uprising, Lady Rhea decided that perhaps now would be the time for Dimitri to be introduced to me.” Eve continued on. “And so that’s how Dimitri and I became engaged, and how I came to the Officer’s Academy.”

“But why lie about your meeting and about your crest?” Ingrid asked.

“Well, the idea was that I would never have to use my crest.” Eve sighed. “At best I would marry Dimitri and serve as his queen. At worst, I would be required to use my crest to save the Blaiddyd bloodline. So, we created the story we told everyone to hide the fact that our marriage had been arranged and that I had a crest.”

“I don’t know about all this complicated stuff, and I’m a little sad you were lying to us,” Annette added timidly, “but I am really glad you’re a part of our class. You’re really nice and I think that’s what matters!”

“Thank you, Annette, truly.” Eve smiled. “I hope you all believe me when I say it pained me greatly to lie to all of you. And I know it was eating away at Dimitri too. We never wanted to lie, but we had to for my safety and the safety of Garreg Mach.”

“I want to apologise as well for keeping the truth from all of you.” Dimitri interjected. “It pained me deeply to have to lie to those who trust me.”

“I know it will probably take some time, but I do hope each of you will one day see me as an ally.” Eve added. “I never wanted to have to lie. And though I may be in danger now after revealing my crest, I can’t help but feel relieved that now I can share the truth with you all.”

Eve had to commend Dimitri’s quick thinking. This idea had not only satisfied Seteth but had also worked without a hitch. The Blue Lions were eating up every last word Eve said without question. Eve attributed the fact that this lie was more based in truth than their last one to its success.

Eve could only hope that this lie could last much longer than the last one. Most of the other students would be willing to accept that she had had to lie to them before. But if it came out that she was still lying, they would never trust her. And though she could bear being seen as a liar, she didn’t want to drag Dimitri down with her too. The fate of the Kingdom lied in the success of their new lie.

* * *

After class had settled and Eve and Dimitri had sufficiently finished their damage control, Eve found herself sneaking onto the roof of the dormitories. It was a beautiful day and the combination of the cool air and the sun on her face made it the perfect place to steal away from her own thoughts.

It had not even been one moon since she arrived in Garreg Mach, and yet so much had already happened. Eve had gone in thinking it would be so easy to play the part of Dimitri’s doting fiancée; she had been so confident that their charade could last. But she hadn’t accounted for Felix. She had known him all his life, watched him from the shadows as a servant to his house. Knowing what she knew about him, she had expected him to be dismissive of her-- tolerating her at best. But she never would have expected him to take an interest in her. Twice now he had kissed her, and Eve still wasn’t sure what to do about that. The first time could have been written off as an impulse, an accident. But the second time was so deliberate and purposeful, Eve couldn’t ignore it.

“That was quite the performance you gave.” Eve was startled out of her thoughts by Yuri’s voice as he hoisted himself over the edge of the roof.

“Yuri.” Eve blinked, still shocked. “How did you get up here?”

“I climbed.” He stated, matter of fact, and gestured down at where he had come from.

“Why?” Her brow furrowed as he came to sit next to her.

“I saw the tip of your shoe from below.” Yuri motioned to her foot that was just over the edge. “I was curious who was up here. Didn’t think I’d find you.”

Eve drew back the offending foot and shifted so she sat higher up on the roof. Yuri was probably the last person she wanted to see at this moment. He was the only one outside of Dedue and Felix who knew she was still lying about her relationship with Dimitri.

“If it weren’t for the fact that I knew you were still lying, I would have believed everything you said back there.” Yuri smirked, looking at Eve from the corner of his eye.

“I’m not lying.” Eve glared at Yuri when he snorted in response. “I’m simply omitting certain facts that aren’t important.”

“What else are you omitting, hm?” Yuri turned to face Eve with an eyebrow raised. “Does your little prince know about our meeting the last time you were at Garreg Mach?”

“I told him that we met previously, yes.” Eve nodded.

“That’s all?” Yuri smirked.

“What else is there to know?” Eve retorted.

“Well, everyone is different.” Yuri shrugged with a sigh. “I just know that I’d want to know who was warming my fiancée’s bed before me.”

“If I recall correctly it was me warming _your_ bed.” Eve half laughed.

“All the same.” Yuri chuckled. “So, I’m guessing you haven’t told him about our, ahem, rendezvous, if you will?”

“Why would I?” Eve shrugged with a small frown. “It’s not like we’re marrying for love. Besides, Dimitri is such a prude he’d probably melt from embarrassment if I tried to bring up the topic with him.”

“Does _he_ know that?” Yuri asked.

“Know what?” Eve frowned again.

“That you’re not marrying for love.” Yuri answered.

“Of course he knows.” Eve turned to look out at the view.

“I wouldn’t be so sure.” Yuri said, following Eve’s gaze outward.

“What makes you say that?” She asked.

“The way he looks at you.” Yuri answered simply.

“He hasn’t even known me for a full moon cycle yet, he can’t love me.” Eve sighed with a shake of her head, eyes still fixed on the horizon.

“You forget that His Princeliness has likely never experienced romance, real or not.” Yuri shrugged. “I wouldn’t be surprised if he mistook your act for genuine feelings.”

“I suppose there are worse things that could happen.” Eve said. “Afterall, I felt terrible he’s been roped into my mess. If he falls in love with me maybe he can marry for love in the end.”

“Do you love him back, though?” Yuri turned to look at Eve questioningly.

“Of course not.” She recoiled at the question. “I don’t even know him.”

“Then I feel sorry for the poor bastard.” Yuri turned away once more. “Only thing worse than being stuck in a loveless marriage is being stuck in one where you love someone who will never love you in return.”


	15. Fourteen

Dimitri strode down the corridor of the main hall with his mind muddled with thoughts. He had just heard from Seteth about their new mission, and it was weighing heavy on his mind. It was sure to be hard on Sylvain when he heard that this month’s mission involved facing his brother. The Kingdom was teeming with unrest ever since that fateful day when Dimitri lost his father. And now that burden was going to fall on his professor and his classmates because of his failures as a leader.

“Professor.” Dimitri called out when he saw Byleth standing in the main hall. “I heard about our mission for this month. So... We are to eradicate thieves in Kingdom territory. I'm sorry for dragging into the Kingdom's petty squabbles. This should not be your burden to bear, but my own...”

“I’m happy to help.” She answered briefly. And though no emotion showed in her face when she said it, Dimitri knew the professor meant what she said.

“Thank you, Professor,” Dimitri bowed, “hearing you say that puts my mind at ease.”

When he straightened from his bow, Dimitri noticed a familiar figure approaching the two of them.

“Your Highness? Ah, it’s been ages!” It was Rodrigue who came to stand with them, looking directly at the prince as he intentionally mentioned their time apart.

“It’s been a long time!” Dimitri picked up on Rodrigue’s cue, understanding that no one could know his connection to Eve. “Two years, if I’m not mistaken.”

“Indeed, Your Highness. You've grown so much in those years. I hardly recognize you.” Rodrigue smiled, nodding in appreciation.

“Who’s this?” Byleth asked, head cocked to the side.

“This is Rodrigue, an old friend of my father's. I believe I've mentioned him, if you recall. When my father died four years ago, he looked after me as though I were his own son.” Dimitri turned to his professor to introduce her to Rodrigue.

“You flatter me, Your Highness.” Rodrigue laughed. “It was my honour to care for such a fine, young man. It's nice to finally meet you, Professor. My son, Felix, has mentioned you on occasion.”

“What brings you to the monastery, Rodrigue? Is it the thieves plaguing the Kingdom?” Dimitri was surprised to hear that Felix had been in contact with his father. He wondered what else Felix might have written about in his letters to Rodrigue.

“I'm afraid so. This is not merely a problem for House Gautier, but for everyone.” Rodrigue nodded gravely. “The thieves have set up their headquarters in Fraldarius territory, and are mercilessly pillaging the villages of that area. You have our full support in stopping those dastards. I thank you for your help, both of you.”

Dimitri and the professor finished their talk with the Fraldarius Lord before going their separate ways. He had promised Rodrigue that he would look for Felix to tell him his father wished to meet with him. Normally, he would have headed straight for the training grounds. But if he knew anything about Felix, it would be that news of his father’s arrival would mean he would be hiding away somewhere.

After searching several potential places and turning up empty handed, Dimitri went to check if Felix might be holing himself up in his quarters. As he ascended the stairs of the dormitories, Dimitri heard Eve’s familiar voice floating down the hall. She was talking to Felix, a hand resting on his arm. The touch made Dimitri ball his hands into fists involuntarily, and he found himself frustrated that she would be so familiar with him.

“You should talk to him, you know.” Eve was saying, a small frown on her face, as Dimitri approached the two.

“Rodrigue is looking for you.” Dimitri announced his presence, standing beside Eve and wrapping an arm around her waist which did not go unnoticed by his childhood friend.

“Oh, Dimitri.” She looked up at him, withdrawing her hand from Felix’s arm. “Just the person I was looking for.”

She brought up her other hand which was holding a metal tin engraved with an ornate pattern.

“Ferdinand gave me this tea as a gift. He said it’s very rare.” She rattled the tin a bit in emphasis. “I thought we could try it together?”

“Since when are you friends with Ferdinand?” Felix asked, annoyance flashing in his eyes at the mention of the Empire noble.

“Believe it or not,” Eve sighed, “I don’t just talk to you two.”

“Regardless, Felix, your father is looking for you.” Dimitri reiterated.

“Well, he can keep looking for all I care.” Felix crossed his arms.

“Felix, talk to him.” Eve chastised. “I don’t know what it is with you and your father, but your relationship is never going to get better if you don’t talk to him.”

“What if I’m not interested in improving our relationship?” Felix challenged.

“I can’t tell you what to do.” Eve shrugged nonchalantly. “Well, Dimitri, shall we?”

Dimitri followed Eve as she made her way down the corridor and to his room. He couldn’t help but revel in the fact that it was he with whom she chose to share her tea. The tin had been sealed, never before opened. It meant that she didn’t want to share it with Felix or drink it on her own; she wanted to be with Dimitri. And no doubt Ferdinand had gifted the tea hoping that she would invite him to drink it with her.

But another, darker part of his mind wouldn’t allow him to enjoy this small victory. Whispers from the depths of his thoughts chastised him for even daring to think Eve would desire him.

_Why would she want to be with someone like you?_

_You’re just using her to make yourself feel better._

_She’d be better off with Felix._

_You think you have the right to love when none of us ever can again?_

“Stop!” Dimitri pleaded under his breath, clenching his fist so that his nails bit into his palm.

“Hm?” Eve turned from the kettle she had put on to look at the prince. “Did you say something?

“It’s nothing.” He shook his head, trying his best to smile comfortingly.

She turned back around with a shrug and Dimitri watched her carefully. Her hair shimmered like ink as she moved on silent feet to prepare their tea. She was graceful and beautiful and altogether too good for him. The voices of those he couldn’t save were right; he didn’t deserve her. But she had promised him, promised that she would do her best to be a good wife. Was it too much of him to ask her to keep her promise?

“Something’s bothering you.” Eve said over her steaming cup of tea, eyeing Dimitri as if he were a feral animal.

“Nothing is bothering me.” Dimitri shook his head in denial.

“Don’t lie to me.” Eve sighed, placing her cup down gently. “Tell me what’s on your mind, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd.”

“I like to think I’m a man of my word.” Dimitri started slowly, pausing to sip his tea.

“A knight of Faerghus never goes back on his word.” Eve repeated to him what he had said to her their first day at the monastery with a small smile.

“And I feel that so far I have kept my promises to you.” Dimitri continued, eyes scanning Eve’s face for her reaction. “So, I feel that perhaps it would not be too much of me to ask you to keep your promises to me in return.”

“Pardon?” Eve sputtered, taken aback. “What do you mean?”

“You promised me you would do your best to be a good wife.” Dimitri pushed on despite his uncertainty.

“I know I was selfish in deciding to save Felix.” Eve said. “But you have to understand that I have a promise to House Fraldarius too.”

“This isn’t about that.” Dimitri shook his head.

“Then by all means, please tell me what it is about.” Eve gestured towards the prince, frustrated.

“I’ve been trying very hard to accept you as my future wife.” Dimitri sighed. “We have to spend the rest of our lives together.”

“Are you saying you don’t think I’m doing the same?” Eve sat back in her chair. “I’ve been doing my best to accept our fate together as well.”

“Oh yeah, how?” Dimitri finally burst, his frustration and hurt feelings getting the best of him. “By kissing Felix?”

“Is that what this is about?” Eve scoffed.

“I saw you two in the infirmary.” Dimitri’s tone was accusatory.

“Felix kissed me.” Eve said. “I didn’t initiate.”

“But you didn’t push him away either.” Dimitri shot back. “You said people would talk if I never produced an heir with you. And yet did you not consider that people would talk of your infidelity.”

“My what?” Eve laughed bitterly. “It’s a kiss, Dimitri. Yes, I should have pushed him away, you’re right. But why are you so worked up? It’s not like Felix took me to bed.”

“Have you no shame speaking of things like that so easily?” Dimitri blushed at the idea of his fiancée and his childhood friend being together carnally.

“No, as a matter of fact, I don’t.” Eve answered. “And even if Felix had bedded me, why should it matter? It wouldn’t reflect poorly on you even if anyone found out.”

“Because I love you, Eve!” Dimitri snapped, rising from his chair to grab her by the shoulders desperately.

“Don’t say that.” She answered coldly, brushing his hands off of her.

“Eve, I know it hasn’t been long since we met, but I can’t ignore the feelings I’ve developed for you.” Dimitri pleaded as he knelt down before Eve. “I find myself grateful that you and I are engaged to wed.”

“You don’t love me, Dimitri.” Eve shook her head. “You don’t even know me.”

“Then let me know you.” Dimitri took her hands in his, clasping them tightly.

“No.” She answered simply.

“Why not?” He asked, his eyes boring into hers. “Are you so afraid to let me in? What’s the worst that could happen if you allowed yourself just for a moment to open yourself up to me?”

“The worst that could happen is-!” Eve cut herself off as if just realising what she was about to say. “My past is complicated, Dimitri, it’s dangerous if you get caught up in all of it more than you already have.”

“Why do you always do that?” Dimitri asked.

“Do what?” Eve frowned.

“Any time you come anywhere near being honest you shut yourself off.” Dimitri shook his head. “I can’t even count the number of times you’ve almost told me something about you and instead changed the subject.”

“As if you’ve been particularly forthcoming about yourself?” Eve raised an eyebrow.

“I’ve been nothing but honest with you.” Dimitri answered, confused.

“Oh, really?” Eve withdrew her hands from his to cross her arms. “What about your friendship with Felix. You two were inseparable as kids, but now he hardly tolerates you. What happened there? What happened during that uprising? Why do your eyes sometimes cloud over with a sinister anger that you try so hard to hide under that princely façade? Well, Dimitri? Two can play that game.”

“You’re right.” Dimitri hung his head, suddenly exhausted by his out-of-character outburst. “If I promise you to be more honest about my own path, could you promise to tell me more about yours?”

“No, I’m sorry.” Eve sighed, cupping Dimitri’s face gently with one hand to bring his gaze back up to hers. “You can keep your secrets if you want.”

“Why won’t you let me know you?” Dimitri asked, searching her eyes for some kind of answer.

“I told you,” she sighed again, “my past is very complicated. It’ll do you no good to know about who I am or what I’ve done.”

“Why are you so opposed to the idea of me loving you?” Dimitri couldn’t help but feel hurt at the rejection. “Is it Felix?”

“It’s got nothing to do with Felix.” Eve shook her head. “If you love me it makes all of this so much harder. It would be great if we could be friends and go through this marriage as partners and allies. But if you love me this marriage will only bring you pain and heartbreak.”

“Not if you chose to love me back.” Dimitri muttered softly, almost inaudible.

“I can’t do that.” Eve caressed Dimitri’s cheek gently as if comforting a child. “I don’t have the right to love someone again.”

Dimitri looked up at Eve in wonder. Why would she say that? He could barely fathom that someone like Eve would feel the same way he did. Perhaps this is what he deserved. He didn’t have the right to love anyone, or ever the right to continue on living, and yet he had dared to. Now the Goddess was punishing him for his hubris, for thinking he could happily love Eve despite the trail of corpses that filled his past.

“I think I’ve said enough.” Eve stood, withdrawing her hand from his face. “I’m sorry to have hurt you, Dimitri, but it’s for the best that you forget about your school-boy crush on me. I’ll see you at supper.”


	16. Fifteen

Eve all but ran out of Dimitri’s room despite his calling after her. She couldn’t stand to be in that room, in that situation, a moment longer. It was all too much for her, the idea that Dimitri would think he was in love with her. He knew next to nothing about her, he couldn’t possibly love her.

It wasn’t as if Eve were opposed to the idea of being loved-- in general or by Dimitri. She just knew that now wasn’t the time, especially not for the kind of love Dimitri thought he had for her. They still had parts to play, lies to live, and any complications to their relationship would make doing that even harder.

Not to mention Eve still had to figure out what was going on with Felix. Dimitri was right about one thing that she hadn’t pushed Felix away when he kissed her even though she should have. Regardless of her own feelings, she was still engaged to marry Dimitri and kissing anyone else didn’t look good for any of the parties involved. She hadn’t wanted to push Felix away, though, and that was worrisome in and of itself. Eve didn’t subscribe to the same brand of foolishness as Dimitri to think she was in love with Felix, but she did certainly take a liking to the Fraldarius heir.

Felix had always been rough around the edges, sometimes downright rude and dismissive. In fact, it had been because of that that Eve had been confident he wouldn’t recognise her when she came to the Academy. He never would have taken the time to memorise the face of a servant, of this she had been sure. But in this past month he had taken more notice of her than he had in all his previous seventeen years combined. And though he was still the same crude boy who didn’t worry about hurting anyone’s feelings, something was different now.

For one, Felix respected Eve. Even before he knew the truth, even before he kissed her, Eve could tell that he had some level of respect for her. He wouldn’t speak with her, but he would spar with her. Anyone who knew anything about Felix knew that he traded blows much more often than he traded words, and that if he found you to be a worthy sparring partner that was as close as you’d get to him liking you.

But it was so much more than that, especially now after she had told him about her connection to his house. He had started to open up to her. Sure, he was still abrasive and seemed to get very easily angry with her, but Eve found herself valuing the few words he’d share with her. And she was the only one who could mention Glenn around him without getting a tongue lashing; anyone else would never be able to get a word in edgewise about his brother.

“Get it together.” Eve shook her head as she chastised herself.

Thoughts like that had no place in her mind. She didn’t need to figure out how she felt about Felix because it didn’t matter. At the end of the day she only had two options: disappear from Fodlan or marry Dimitri. There was no space for Felix in either of those options. She had a duty to fulfil. And Eve knew better than anyone the importance of fulfilling one’s duty, she had already paid the price once before for turning her back on her designated path.

“I hope you’re a good cook ‘cause I’m not gonna be much help here.” Eve was snapped out of her thoughts by a jovial voice just over her shoulder.

“Sylvain.” She started. Deep in thought, she hadn’t realised she made it to the kitchen where she was to report for kitchen duty. “Wasn’t Ingrid supposed to have kitchen duty today?”

“Yeah,” Sylvain laughed sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck, “but Ingrid said something or another about owing her, so I’m taking over today.”

“Why’s that?” Eve quirked an eyebrow up, happy for the distraction from her own thoughts.

“I guess it’s not uncommon for girls to think Ingrid’s my girlfriend or something.” Sylvain shrugged. “She said she’s had to put up with one too many jealous girls from town squabbling about whose man I am, so… kitchen duty.”

Sylvain gestured noncommittally to punctuate his point before throwing a lopsided grin in Eve’s direction. She snorted in response, the hints of a smile tugging the corners of her mouth upwards.

“Come on.” Sylvain goaded as he rolled up his sleeves to help with the prep work. “Don’t be shy, give us a smile. I bet you’d look so much prettier.”

“Then it’s a good thing I’m not concerned with looking any prettier.” Eve said before adding with a mischievous grin, “I’ve got to give the other girls around here a fighting chance, haven’t I?”

“You know, you’re not so bad.” Sylvain mused, peeling carrots over a bucket of other food scraps.

“Funny how that happens.” Eve replied sarcastically. “When you give people a chance rather than judging them on your own preconceptions, sometimes they turn out to not be so bad. I thought you of all people would understand that.”

“Okay, yeah, I owe you an apology.” Sylvain watched Eve carefully out of the corner of his eye, fully expecting her to be angry with him. But he was instead surprised to see that her demeanour held an air of amusement.

“Perhaps you can apologise by taking over my kitchen duty.” Eve suggested, not looking up from the herbs she was mincing though her lips formed a playful smirk.

“Oh, come on!” Sylvain cried out, stopping his peeling to look at Eve. “Triple kitchen duty? That’s absolute torture. Not just for me but imagine all the poor people who will have to eat food I made!”

“I’m joking.” Eve let out a hearty laugh, one only Dimitri had been privy to before now. “I’ve got an idea how you can apologise to me. And we can kill two birds with one stone.”

“I like the way that sounds.” Sylvain grinned at her. He was amazed how easy Eve was to talk to. Sylvain had expected her to be solemn and closed off. But talking to her now he realised she was mischievous and dare he even say playful.

“You can take me for dinner on the town sometime.” Eve offered. “Somewhere nice, though. I won’t let you cheap me out on an apology date.”

“Only the best for the future Queen of Faerghus.” Sylvain grinned cheekily.

“I get a nice meal as an apology,” Eve gestured with a wave of her hand, “and while we’re out maybe some girls in town will see us together. And they can start bothering me instead of Ingrid, so you don’t have to take Ingrid’s kitchen duty anymore.”

“Sounds like you’ve got a deal on your hands.” Sylvain wiped his hand on his trouser leg before extending it towards Eve. She glanced at it before taking his hand in her own and shaking firmly.

The two returned quietly to their work side by side, a newfound camaraderie between them. While they worked, Eve fought to keep her thoughts from wandering. She focused her everything on seasoning the food, stirring the pot, washing dishes. But it wasn’t enough. Even the most raging battle wouldn’t have stopped Eve from thinking about what Dimitri had said earlier.

“Hey, Sylvain.” Eve piped up as they were taking out the food scraps to be given to the horses.

“What’s up?” He looked over at the raven-haired girl beside him.

“You’ve known Dimitri all his life.” She said slowly. “Has he ever been in love before?”

“His Highness?” Sylvain half laughed. “I think the closest he’s ever gotten to love is a childhood crush he had when he was little. Which is why I was so surprised he was able to act like he was in love with you so convincingly.”

“Well, that might be because it wasn’t an act…” Eve trailed off, biting her lip. “At least not after the beginning.”

“What makes you say that?” Sylvain cocked his head.

“Call it a hunch.” Eve half laughed. “Or call it Dimitri proclaiming he’s in love with me about an hour ago in his quarters.”

“Well, that would do it.” Sylvain’s eyes widened in shock. “Do I dare ask if you feel the same way?”

“Probably best if you don’t.” Eve winced as if the prospect physically pained her.

“Oh boy, that’s, ah, that’s…” Sylvain clicked his tongue in place of a coherent thought, arms locked behind his head as the two of them made their way back to the dining hall.

“Yeah.” Eve nodded in agreement.

Neither of them said anything; neither of them even knew what they could say. They walked back in silence, the dilemma now weighing heavy on both of them rather than just Eve. Both of them knew that, in the long run, it didn’t matter who loved who. At the end of it all, Dimitri and Eve would get married regardless. But both of them also knew that if Dimitri continued to be in love with Eve, he would only live a life of pain which neither of them wanted for him.

“I’m gonna suggest something,” Sylvain started as they returned to the kitchen, “and it’s gonna make me sound like a terrible person.”

“Uh-huh.” Eve folded her arms, raising a questioning eyebrow.

“His Highness is my friend.” Sylvain gestured aimlessly with his hands. “And I’d never want to hurt him.”

“I know this, Sylvain.” Eve interrupted. “Get to the point.”

“What if you broke his heart now?” The redhead suggested tentatively. “Do it now so he falls out of love with you and doesn’t live a life of pain and unrequited love.”

“You want me to break your childhood friend’s heart?” Eve asked.

“I know, it sounds bad.” Sylvain sighed. “But I do it all the time. I break girls’ hearts so they can move on without any hang-ups or lingering feelings for me.”

“Your support for your argument is ‘I do it all the time’?” Eve smirked, half laughing. “It’s not a terrible idea, though.”

“Look at it this way, it’s like treating a wound.” Sylvain offered. “You could leave it alone and let it fester and become much worse in the long run, or you could endure a lot of pain now and cauterise the wound. Both suck, but one sucks for way less time.”

“I do suppose you have a point, Sylvain.” Eve sighed. It was something she had already thought of to be honest, but she had hoped that there would be a way around it—some way where Dimitri didn’t get hurt at all.

“Not often I hear that.” Sylvain laughed. “Anyways, looks like we’re all done with kitchen duty, so I’m gonna go wash up before we enjoy the fruits of our labours.”

“Sylvain.” Eve called out before he could get too far. She had an idea—a terrible, selfish idea—that would solve both of her problems at once.

“Yep.” He stopped in his tracks, waiting as Eve walked up to him.

“Do you want to help me?” Eve asked.

“Depends.” Sylvain shrugged. “I’m pretty much useless with things unless you want me to flirt for you.”

“Oh, I think this falls under your area of expertise.” Eve smirked, inspecting her cuticles casually. “I hear you know your way around the female form.”

“I might have had some hands-on experience.” Sylvain winked with a smirk and a laugh. “But, ah, what’s that got to do with helping you?”

“You were gracious enough to suggest breaking Dimitri’s heart.” Eve said, watching Sylvain out of the corner of her eye. “I thought maybe you could help me do it.”

“Help you how?” Sylvain frowned slightly.

“How do you think Dimitri would react if he found out his fiancée and his childhood friend had, how you said, ‘hands-on experience’ with each other?” Eve quirked an eyebrow up at Sylvain, trying to gauge his reaction.

“I…” Sylvain swallowed thickly. “I don’t want to be an ass and assume what we’re talking about.”

“Sex, Sylvain.” Eve said plainly, though her voice was low so as not to be overheard. “I’m asking you to sleep with me. Purely physical, no strings attached. We both get to have our fun and I get to break Dimitri’s heart to cauterise the wound as you suggested.”

“You sure you’re fine with that?” Sylvain asked. Eve was shocked that that was the only question he asked. She had half expected more resistance, even from Sylvain. “Lots of girls say they want no strings attached, but they don’t actually mean it.”

“Believe me, I’ve got no time for feelings and I’ve already got plenty of other strings.” Eve said with a shake of her head, still bewildered that Sylvain would go along with this so easily.

“Well, I’ve got no complaints.” Sylvain shrugged before adding with a laugh, “just don’t go quarrelling with Ingrid about whose man I am so I have to take her kitchen duty again.”

“Deal.” Eve laughed, reaching out to shake Sylvain’s hand for the second time that evening.

With that, she could not only solve her Dimitri problem, but she could also get Felix out of her mind. It was terrible and selfish, but it was also effective. She could have just as easily gone to Yuri, given the two of them already knew each other intimately. But being with Sylvain was sure to have a bigger impact on Dimitri. He was already left feeling betrayed by a simple kiss, Eve knew bedding one of his closest friends would definitely break his heart. And if she was lucky and Felix found out about her being with Sylvain too he would go back to hating her and she wouldn’t have to worry about any complex feelings between them.

“I’ll come by your quarters after supper, then.” Eve said with a small nod. "We'll be discreet enough that no one else finds out, but not so discreet that Dimitri won't notice."

“I'm at your service.”


	17. Sixteen

Sylvain wasn’t even really sure why he accepted Eve’s proposition, let alone why he did so without a moment’s hesitation. Maybe it was because he wanted to help Eve. Or maybe it was because he wanted to make sure Dimitri got over his unrequited love. But Sylvain was selfish by nature, of this he knew very well; he could thank his crest for that. In truth, Eve’s proposition had been a welcome one. With the upcoming mission and the prospect of having to face Miklan, Sylvain was dying for a distraction. The girls in town all wanted too much from him; there was too much foreplay involved for his liking. He didn’t want to go through the effort of courting girls, taking them out on dates, and showering them with all the right words to get them to his bed. But Eve didn’t want anything from him, didn’t want his sweet words or meals on his coin. She didn’t want his crest or his title or his money, just him in the most natural of senses. And the best part was that she had been the one to offer the arrangement; Sylvain didn’t have to worry about his conscience taking a hit and feeling like he was taking advantage of her. They were both taking advantage of each other, and that’s why it was perfect.

A part of him did feel guilty, however, for what he was about to do to His Highness. Dimitri was a good guy with a pure heart, but that pure heart was only going to bring him pain if he continued to think he was in love with Eve. Sylvain told himself that he was doing this for His Highness’ sake in the long run.

“Goddess, it almost looks like you’re trying to form a thought.” Felix came to sit next to where Sylvain sat in the sauna with a grimace on his face.

“Felix, you always know just how to make me swoon.” Sylvain laughed at the insult, clapping his friend on the back.

“What’s gotten you suddenly interested in using that head of yours?” Felix sneered.

“Mmm just a little lady.” Sylvain hummed playfully, looking at Felix from the corner of his eye.

“I should have known.” Felix scoffed. “You really are insatiable.”

“Perhaps.” Sylvain shrugged. “But I’d wager Eve’s gotten you having one or two thoughts of your own.”

Felix’s head snapped up at the mention of Eve to which Sylvain grinned mischievously. He had hit his mark. Sylvain had had a suspicion that Felix was particularly interested in Eve after seeing how much time the younger boy spent with her. And of course, the one girl Felix had to be interested in was one that already belonged to Dimitri of all people. Antagonising Felix about his little crush would no doubt serve as another entertaining distraction for Sylvain.

“I knew you were stupid, but I didn’t think you’d be so dumb as to try and pursue Dimitri’s future wife.” Felix tried to feign nonchalance as if Sylvain hadn’t just clearly seen his reaction to Eve’s name.

“I’m innocent.” Sylvain put his hands up as if in surrender. “I’m not the one doing the pursuing.”

“Right, sure.” Felix gave his childhood friend a sidelong glance.

“I’m being serious!” Sylvain laughed. “I wouldn’t dare try to flirt with His Highness’ girl. I’m not nearly as bold as you.”

“It’s got nothing to do with being bold.” Felix crossed his arms.

“So, you admit it.” Sylvain grinned from ear to ear. “You’re trying to flirt with her.”

Felix’s eyes widened as he realised what he had just said. And Sylvain wagered that if they weren’t already flushed from the heat of the sauna, Felix would have started to blush too.

“I’m not you.” Felix tried to deflect. “I’m not flirting with anyone.”

“Well, you had me fooled.” Sylvain shrugged, grinning wickedly as he continued to tease. “But I wouldn’t blame you if you were flirting with her. I mean, have you _seen_ Eve? Goddess, the things I’d do to that body of hers.”

“If you lay a finger on her, I’ll kill you.” Felix was up faster than lightning, grabbing Sylvain’s shirt tightly in his fist.

“Woah, woah.” Sylvain put his hands up, laughing at how adorably angry Felix looked. “You’re rather worked up, aren’t you?”

“She’s…” Felix let go of Sylvain, looking away with embarrassment. “She’s my friend.”

“Uh-huh.” Sylvain raised an eyebrow. “Do you always care this much about who your friends choose to sleep with?”

“I just care that you don’t do anything to her that she doesn’t want.” Felix sat back down sheepishly. “You know, because she’s my friend.”

“So, what you’re saying is,” Sylvain watched Felix out of the corner of his eye, another shit-eating grin forming on his face, “if she _wanted_ me to do something to her then you wouldn’t care.”

“I don’t know why you’re so focused on this hypothetical.” Felix said through gritted teeth. “Eve would never, so it doesn’t matter if I’d care or not.”

“Never’s a pretty strong word.” Sylvain leaned back with a sigh, stretching his arms above his head.

“She’s loyal.” Felix said with a hint of bitterness. “She wouldn’t betray Dimitri.”

“Don’t sound so disappointed when you say that.” Sylvain laughed. “It almost sounds like you wish she’d betray him.”

“It’s none of our business.” Felix huffed, getting up to leave the sauna. “It’s between her, the boar, and the Church. It’s got nothing to do with me.”

As Felix walked away Sylvain came to the sudden realisation that Eve was using him in more ways than one. She wasn’t just trying to break Dimitri’s heart, she was trying to break Felix’s as well. Sylvain had picked up on Felix’s affection for Eve quite early on. In fact, the first time the two had trained together he saw how interested Felix became in Eve based on her skill alone. He had thought that maybe it was a begrudging rivalry that developed into fond feelings. But Sylvain never would have imagined how much Felix actually felt for Eve. The way he talked about her now was unlike any other person. And when Sylvain so much as suggested any impure thoughts about Eve, the fury in Felix’s eyes wasn’t that of a friend. Felix was angry not just because he didn’t want Sylvain to tarnish Eve, but because he also was having those thoughts and was ashamed of them. Sylvain knew all too well the look of a man who had fantasised about a particular girl. And knowing Felix, the guy was probably so pent up he didn’t know what to do with his feelings for Eve.

“Almost makes you feel bad for the sorry bastards.” Sylvain sighed to himself. Though a rather cruel, minute portion of his mind was interested to see how this would all play out between those three.

* * *

Eve’s mind was completely clear for the first time in what felt like weeks as she made her way back to her quarters after speaking with Sylvain. She felt somewhat excited that tonight she’d be able to steal back a sliver of freedom for herself. Since she arrived at the Officer’s Academy, she had done everything at the direction of Rodrigue and Dimitri and Rhea. But now she was going to take back control of her narrative, even if it was in the smallest of ways.

Her elation was shattered, however, as Eve rounded the corner of the gardens and saw Seteth standing outside her door. He was clearly waiting for her, standing in front of her door like a sentry with his hands clasped behind his back. Quickly, Eve ducked back into the garden to hide out of view of Seteth. She had wanted to change into clean clothing before supper but facing the Archbishop’s aide was completely out of the question.

“You’re Eve, aren’t you?” A gruff voice made Eve start and she turned to face its owner.

“Captain Jeralt.” She regarded the captain with a nod, noticing that he seemed to have been watching her for longer than she had been aware of him.

“My daughter is your new professor.” He stated. “Byleth.”

“Yes, that’s correct.” Eve nodded again, wondering what he wanted from her.

“Come to my office.” Jeralt said suddenly. “I’ve been needing to speak to you about something.”

“Now?” Eve was taken aback. What did he need to talk to her about?

“If you don’t mind.” Jeralt said, though his tone implied that refusing wasn’t really an option.

After a moment of hesitation, Eve followed after the captain. She figured whatever he wanted to talk to her about was probably less annoying than whatever reason Seteth was waiting outside her room. And Eve wasn’t particularly afraid of Jeralt or any questions he might have for her. He might have been serving the church, but he was not a blind follower. And he certainly didn’t seem the type to report to Rhea if Eve didn’t’ say just the right things.

“What was it you wanted to speak to me about?” Eve asked curiously as they arrived in the captain’s quarters and Jeralt closed the door behind them.

“Take a seat if you like.” Jeralt motioned towards the chairs in his office as he himself sat down.

“I do hope I’m not in any trouble.” Eve smiled as she took up his offer and sank into one of the plush chairs.

“Let’s cut to the chase.” Jeralt said, eyes boring directly into Eve’s. “You and I have met-- a long time ago.”

“It’s entirely possible.” Eve shrugged. “Given I’ve been living under the protection of the Church.”

“Your name wasn’t Eve then.” Jeralt said, still watching Eve intently. “And you weren’t trying to pass yourself off as a teenager back then.”

“I’m not a teenager, Captain Jeralt.” Eve laughed tightly and without humour.

“Just how old are you, Eve?” Jeralt asked.

“Oh, roughly the same age as the other students here.” Eve gestured vaguely.

“That’s what I thought.” Jeralt grumbled. “You’re intentionally vague when it comes to any details about who you are. Not to mention that crest of yours. You’re her, aren’t you?”

“Captain, I’m sure you must have me confused with someone else.” Eve shook her head before adding with a cunning smile. “Besides, even if I was who you think I am, I’d have met you so long ago I’d have questions of my own regarding _your_ age.”

Jeralt started, eyes widening as he jerked back in surprise at Eve’s words. She watched him closely as he put together the pieces. Eve had planned for Jeralt to eventually recognise her. But she had been curious to see how long he would have tried to convince himself that she just reminded him of someone. Of course, after she had used her crest out in the open, she knew it was only a matter of time before Jeralt realised who she was.

“You haven’t aged a day.” Jeralt said after he had collected himself.

“Neither have you, Jeralt.” Eve smiled.

“So, Rhea managed to rope both of us back in with her.” Jeralt scratched his head in thought.

Eve watched the captain and thought back to when she had first met him. He had had fewer scars, had looked less jaded about the world. Now, he seemed tired. It was a look Eve knew all too well, like looking in a mirror. Time had been kind to their appearances, but their souls had not aged as well as their bodies.

“What happened with you and Rhea?” Eve asked out of curiosity. “When I knew you, you thought the world of her.”

“That was a lifetime ago. Quite literally.” Jeralt let out a half-hearted laugh. “The longer I stayed by Rhea, the more I saw the things she’d do in the name of the Goddess. She’s not a bad person, but…”

“I get it.” Eve said when Jeralt didn’t continue. “It’s the same reason I never stayed. I couldn’t be a part of all that.”

“And what happened to you?” Jeralt asked. “Why are you called Eve now? Why did you come back here?”

“If it makes you feel any better, the name you knew me by isn’t my real name either.” Eve replied with a small smile. “And I came back because I had to. It was the only way I could remain in Fodlan.”

“In the end, both of us just ended up right back here.” Jeralt sighed. “Tell me one thing, though.”

“Anything.” Eve nodded.

“Does the prince know?” Jeralt asked.

“Not yet.” Eve shook her head. “I don’t know how to bring it up. A miracle crest is somewhat believable, but the rest of me?”

“I imagine you’ll be fine for now, but as the years go by, he’ll start to notice.” Jeralt said pensively as if thinking about his own situation with his daughter.

“I suppose we’ll both have to cross that bridge when we get to it, won’t we?” Eve shared a knowing look with the captain. And she found herself noticing a certain light in Jeralt’s eyes that hadn’t been there all those years ago. They were both now weathered by the passage of time, but despite all the despair there was a new hope for Jeralt. And Eve realised that that hope was Byleth. She had given Jeralt’s weathered soul a new light, a new purpose. And despite her best efforts, Eve found herself wondering if she could find someone like that to give her life a new light.


	18. Seventeen

If there was an award for the most selfish being in all of Fodlan, Eve would have given it to Rhea. But she would probably consider herself a close second to the Archbishop. This thought passed through her mind as she sat in the dining hall with the other Blue Lions. To her left was Ashe, excitedly telling her about a new book he found in the market that day. And on her right was Felix who ate quietly though it didn’t go unnoticed by Eve that he sat so close their arms brushed against each other more than once. Across from her sat Dimitri, flanked on either side by Dedue and Sylvain. And though the prince was stiff with her after their conversation earlier, Eve found herself content with her situation.

She was sat at a table surrounded by people who trusted her, whether that trust was warranted or not. They were kind and jovial and openly accepted her into their lives. Even those who had been suspicious of her before like Dedue, Sylvain, and Felix were now her friends. In just one month these raucous youths had brought down her defences. It hadn’t been since Glenn that Eve had really considered anyone her friend. And now she looked around the table and found herself surrounded by people she considered friends.

All this was undeserved, however, and Eve knew it. She was still lying to all of these people. Even those who thought they knew the truth didn’t know everything. These people didn’t know her, weren’t friends with her. They were friends with the face she put forward of a peasant girl from Faerghus with a rare crest and no knowledge of the outside world. They were all friends with Eve, a name and a face that weren’t truly hers. But that didn’t stop her from wanting to bottle this moment she was in. She wanted to be happy, to be surrounded by people who would laugh with her and fight by her side.

And for a moment, Eve wondered if it would be too terrible to let Dimitri love her. Perhaps she could learn to love him in return someday. If she allowed him to carry on loving her, maybe one day she could tell him the truth about who she was and it wouldn’t matter. But that was entirely too much for Eve to ask of him. Dimitri had been through enough in his life. If she told him who she was, she would shatter his whole view of the world. She couldn’t do that to him, not after all he had lived through. As his wife, she would do everything in her power to shield him from that which might hurt him. But to do that, she had to hurt him now and break his heart.

“You’ve hardly eaten, Eve.” Dimitri was looking straight at Eve as he spoke, and she wondered for how long he had been watching her absorbed in her thoughts.

“Can you blame me? I saw first-hand the methods Sylvain used in the kitchen.” She laughed in an effort to deflect the prince’s worry. It hurt like an arrow to the heart, however, seeing how Dimitri was still so caring and attentive towards her after she had coldly reacted to his proclamation of love. Now she realised why he had been so worried for her when she was injured. Even back then, he was harbouring feelings for her.

Thankfully, Dimitri didn’t press the issue and Sylvain cut in with some kind of banter of his own and the topic changed swiftly. Eve gladly returned to her thoughts, now mechanically reminding herself to shovel food into her mouth all the while.

“Something’s bothering you.” Felix came up to Eve as she was returning her plates, the other Blue Lions having finished their meals now going their separate ways for the evening.

“Nothing you should concern yourself with.” Eve gave him a small smile.

“Is it…” Felix trailed off, only trying again after faltering for a moment. “Does it have to do with…?”

“No.” Eve shook her head. “Though, we probably should talk about that.”

She beckoned for Felix to follow her as she strode out of the dining hall and down the steps towards the fishing pond. The evening air was cool, a welcome change from the warm afternoons they had been having. But though the air was cool there weren’t many people hanging around outside, making it the perfect place for Eve and Felix to have their discussion without prying ears.

“You can’t keep kissing me out of nowhere and then not saying anything about it, Felix.” Eve said finally as they both came to sit on the dock, their feet dangling just above the water’s surface.

“You say that like it’s a common occurrence.” Felix looked out at the pond rather than at her. “I’ve only done it twice.”

“Twice is two times too many, Felix.” Eve replied, exasperation in her voice. “Dimitri saw us in the infirmary.”

“So what if the boar saw us?” Felix shot back, though this bit of information provided some clarity as to why Dimitri had been acting the way he was.

“I…” Eve sighed, trailing off. “Yes, it doesn’t really matter that Dimitri saw us. But what matters is it can’t happen again.”

“And why’s that?” Felix asked, still avoiding looking at her.

“Because I get the feeling you’re not doing it just for the fun of it.” Eve replied. “I’ve no idea what’s going on in that head of yours, but it’ll do you no good to start having any kinds of feelings towards me.”

“Feelings?” Felix scoffed. “Don’t flatter yourself.”

“Felix.” Eve’s voice commanded attention and Felix found himself finally turning to face her as if he were compelled to do so.

When he did meet her eyes, he was met with a look somewhere between contempt, annoyance, and frustration. It was not a look he had ever been on the receiving end of, and he found he would have preferred if it had stayed that way.

“It would do you some good to be honest with yourself.” She said, gaze unwavering. “It doesn’t matter to me, but you can still get hurt even if you hold people at an arm’s length.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Felix frowned.

“I think you know what I mean.” Eve frowned as well, a small crease forming between her brows.

“Please, enlighten me.” Felix snarled. He didn’t like the way Eve was looking at him. It reminded him a lot of how his father looked at him as if he knew what was in Felix’s heart even when he didn’t know himself.

“I know that Glenn meant more than anything to you.” Eve said softly, fuelling Felix’s rage. “And when you lost him it hurt so much. So now you want to keep everyone away so that if you lose them too it won’t hurt the same way. But it doesn’t work like that, Felix.”

“What do you know about loss?” Felix spat back.

“I lost him too, you know.” Eve replied evenly. “You aren’t the only one who lost Glenn. Rodrigue, Ingrid, Dimitri, we all lost him.”

“But he was _my_ brother.” Felix balled his hands into fists, willing himself to keep his composure.

“Maybe so. But Glenn was something to all of us.” Eve shook her head. “A son, a fiancée, a friend.”

“Don’t talk like you knew him.” Felix hissed. “You’re just a servant who blindly follows my father. What would you know about Glenn.”

“Felix, he was in line to become the head of House Fraldarius.” Eve’s frown deepened as she spoke. “He knew everything.”

Eve thought back to the older Fraldarius as she spoke, a sharp pain piercing her heart. He had truly known everything; he had known even more than Rodrigue knew. When she lost him, she lost the only person who she had trusted enough to tell the truth. And not only that, she had to live with the knowledge that she could have saved him if she had just been there.

_You could have saved me. It’s your fault they’re all hurting._

It was his voice that haunted her at night, made her doubt her every decision as she navigated her life at the Officer’s Academy. But his voice was just one of many that filled her head. There were so many that she had left behind, so many that she had failed. It was why she couldn’t let herself consider how she felt about Dimitri or Felix. Her life belonged to the voices now, not herself.

“Everything?” Felix asked with an eyebrow raised. “Is there more to the story than what you told me?”

“There’s always more to the story.” Eve sighed. “But that’s not the point here, Felix.”

“What is the point, Eve?” Felix asked, exasperated, as he made a sudden realisation. “Because it feels like every time I try to talk to you, you bring up Glenn as a diversion. It’s like you want to get me so riled up about him that I forget to get any real answers from you.”

“The point is, Felix, forget whatever it is you think you’re feeling about me.” Eve said, though she should have been directing her words at herself. She too realised that whenever she got close to feeling something about Felix, she’d bring up Glenn. She’d bring up the thing that would enrage him, the thing that would remind her she wasn’t allowed to feel.

“Only if you tell me why.” Felix crossed his arms. He wasn’t going to let Eve win this easily. She was always holding the cards, always calling the shots. And the only solace he found in it was that she didn’t let Dimitri know any more about her than he did.

“You want me to be honest with you when you won’t even be honest with yourself about how you feel about me?” Eve recoiled.

“Then I’ll make you a deal.” Felix narrowed his eyes at her. If she took this deal, he would be one step closer to balancing the scales. “Tell me one truth about yourself, something only Glenn knew, and I’ll let go of whatever I’m feeling for you.”

“That’s not fair.” Eve drew in a breath.

“You never play fair.” Felix retorted. “It’s time someone turned the tables on you. So what will it be?”

Eve hesitated, searching Felix’s eyes for any sign of wavering. But he seemed absolutely resolute in his decision. She kicked herself for allowing herself to indulge in his company. She should’ve pushed him away when he kissed her, should have gotten angry with him after the first time. If she had done all of that, she wouldn’t be here now. She only had herself to blame. Now all that was left was to come up with something to say that would satisfy Felix’s demand while not giving too much information. And there was only one thing that came to mind that would meet both of those criteria.

“My name isn’t Eve.”

* * *

Eve… No, that wasn’t her name. But what else could Felix call her? She hadn’t even told him what her real name was. All she had said was that Eve wasn’t her name, but that telling him what she was really called would be another secret and their bargain was only for one. Her unwillingness to tell him, however, provided a sliver of additional information. Whatever her name was, it would give something else away about her. Perhaps it would say something about her family or where she was from.

But something became abundantly clear to Felix that evening—Eve was a liar by nature. She lied so easily to him, to Dimitri, to everyone else in their class. Even his father, whom she served so loyally, was being lied to by her. And whenever a lie of hers was exposed, she covered it up with another one.

This revelation should have been terrifying to Felix. Instead, he found himself excited against all better judgement. Eve was a liar, but she had told the truth to him that night. She told _him_ the truth, not the boar. And this led Felix to yet another discovery—he knew exactly how to get Eve to tell the truth to him. All he had to do was continue to let his feelings for her grow. He could abandon his reason and give in to that pull he felt in his chest when they sparred together. Because she would do anything, even tell the truth, to get him to stop. She chastised him for keeping people at an arm’s length, but she was just the same as him. And perhaps that’s why he was so drawn to her.

Felix found himself unable to continue along this avenue of thought, however, as he became distracted by a sound coming from down the hall. It was a sound Felix knew all too well unfortunately; the sound of Sylvain being as insatiable and deplorable as always. He was glad he had Dimitri’s room as a buffer zone, but it wasn’t as if their doors were incredibly soundproof.

“Damn it, Sylvain.” Felix grumbled, getting out of bed. He wanted to think in peace without Sylvain’s activities serving as the background music.

As he opened his door to head down the hall and give the Gautier heir a piece of his mind, Dimitri’s door swung open as well. The prince’s eyes were blurred with sleep that had clearly been interrupted by the squeaking of Sylvain’s bed.

“Mm, kitten.” Sylvain’s voice was husky, a tone neither man had ever wanted to hear him speak in.

“Are you going to do something about this?” Felix asked with a grimace, motioning towards the offender’s door.

“I…” Dimitri was cut off by a particularly loud grunt from Sylvain’s room and his face erupted in a scarlet blush. Leave it to His Highness to be so delicate that he couldn’t even do anything about Sylvain and his extracurriculars.

“Fine.” Felix grumbled when he realised that Dimitri’s embarrassment had rooted him to the spot.

He stormed up to Sylvain’s door, fist ready to knock, before freezing in place as another voice called out.

“Sylvain I’m-!”

Her voice was hushed as if she were trying her best to be quiet. But the breathless exclamation had been heard by both Felix and Dimitri from where they stood. And as they exchanged a look with each other, they both came to the realisation that there was no denying whose voice that was.


	19. Eighteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the gap in updates! I was visiting my parents, so I wasn't writing. Hopefully the slightly longer update makes up for the wait...

That night was not the only night Dimitri and Felix shared the displeasure of overhearing her with Sylvain. A week passed with both silently hoping the other would be the one to address the issue with her. And in that time both Felix and Dimitri found themselves being hyperaware of any contact she would have with the other sex.

She was popular with the men of the Officers Academy, there was no denying that. Dimitri had always been well aware of the watchful eyes that tracked the sway of her hips as she walked around campus. And it wasn’t uncommon for her to have an audience during her training sessions. All of that would have been fine-- after all, she wasn’t responsible for the way others perceived her. But it was clear that she was not oblivious to the attention she received; and in many cases she even reciprocated.

At breakfast, Felix saw her waiting in the queue for food with Claude. In the middle of their conversation, she had brought her face to his mere centimetres apart to swipe an eyelash from his cheek with her finger. And when the leader of the Golden Deer gently blew the offending lash from her index finger with a flirtatious look in his eye, she didn’t even flinch.

Dimitri saw her training in the afternoon with Balthus. He was teaching her the proper way to throw a punch which Dimitri was sure she already knew how. But she let Balthus wrap his arms around her anyways as he showed her how to extend her arm. She didn’t shy away as his muscular body pressed up against hers from behind.

Before supper, she took tea with Ferdinand in the garden. He was having her try a variety of different teas, sipping from the same cups as her. She listened patiently with a smile to his ramblings of teatime etiquette; she didn’t withdraw her hand when he took it in his to give her an impassioned speech about nobility.

In the dining hall, she sat next to Yuri. He offered her a bite of his dessert right from his fork which she accepted without hesitation. And when he wiped cream from the corner of her mouth with his thumb and licked it off with a suggestive wink, her only response was to laugh.

And, of course, there were her evening rendezvous with Sylvain. Neither of them ever heard her come or go, but they always knew when she was in his room. Dimitri had the worst of it, sharing a wall with Sylvain. And for each night he heard them together, his heart broke a little more. On the other hand, Felix’s rage from the first night grew exponentially for every additional time he had to hear Sylvain with her. And at the end of the week, both men had reached a breaking point.

“Eve?” Dimitri knocked tentatively on her door the morning of their free day.

“Come in.” She responded immediately to the prince’s surprise. Ever since his proclamation of love she had been increasingly distant with him.

He opened the door to see her curled up in her favourite spot—sitting on the windowsill that she had set up with cushions, reading. She had a steaming cup of tea in one hand, another book lent to her by Ashe in the other.

“Good morning.” Dimitri bowed at the waist in greeting despite the fact that Eve didn’t look up from her book.

“Morning.” She replied flatly.

“You’re awake rather early considering how late you were up last night.” Dimitri said as casually as he could. He had rehearsed this in his own quarters before approaching Eve. He was still too embarrassed to outright say he knew what she had been doing but wanted to hint at that fact.

“I didn’t sleep.” Her reply, however, was not one he had expected. And she seemingly glossed over his mention of knowing she had been awake late the night before.

“Any particular reason why?” Dimitri asked, determined to continue with his line of questioning.

“I don’t sleep much.” Eve was giving him nothing but a wall. It was as if she had closed back up to him the way she had been when they first met.

“Eve, I know what you were doing last night.” Dimitri sighed, anxiously balling his fists at his sides.

“Mhm.” She muttered, turning the page of her book that she still hadn’t put down. “And what was that?”

“You-!” Dimitri brought a gloved hand up to his face in an attempt to hide his blush.

Eve ignored his exclamation and instead took a sip of her tea, blowing a soft breath over the surface of the steaming liquid. And though her eyes were still fixed on the text in front of her, she had long since stopped reading. Anticipation bubbled in her throat as the prince struggled to find his words. Perhaps finally she had succeeded.

“I meant what I said when we spoke about Felix kissing you.” Dimitri said after a moment of thought, doing his best to skirt around getting into any actual specifics of Eve’s activities.

“Remind me?” Eve quirked an eyebrow up.

“That it would not be too much of me to ask you to hold up your promise to be a good wife.” Dimitri answered. “Back then, it was the kiss you shared with Felix that was my concern. But now, well… I fail to see how your actions correlate to you holding up your promises.”

“And what actions would those be?” Eve asked, finally turning to face Dimitri with a piercing gaze. And in that moment, he realised what she was trying to do. She knew he was embarrassed by the topic at hand, and she was trying to get him to drop the subject. Either that, or she wanted him to lose his composure in a way that would ensure he’d never win any argument against her.

“Why are you so determined to hurt me, Eve?” Dimitri asked softly. “If I have offended you in any way please let me know so I may right my wrong.”

“You want to know what you did wrong?” Eve asked. This was it, this was the final push to get Dimitri to forget about loving her. If she did this just right, he would leave this room with all feelings of love dashed.

“Please.” Dimitri stepped forward.

“You came into my life.” Eve sneered, though on the inside it absolutely killed her to see the flash of pain that crossed through Dimitri’s eyes. “Things were fine with us pretending to be friends or what have you. But did you really think that your proclamation of love would go over well? Everywhere you go, death and destruction follow you. I’m not trying to be one more corpse that you use as a stepping stool to move up in life.”

Dimitri was rooted to the spot, frozen by Eve’s words. But just as she was beginning to think her plan had worked, Dimitri’s eyes softened and he took yet another step closer to her. She watched as he reached out to remove her cup of tea and her book from her hands, placing them off to the side. Still, he said nothing as he climbed onto the windowsill to sit facing her with eyes that seemed to look right through her.

“You think I would have remained Felix’s friend all this time and not learned how to discern when people say cruel things they do not mean?” Dimitri asked as he reached out to take Eve’s hand in his.

“Yes, as a matter of fact I do consider you a fool.” Eve snatched her hand back with a frown.

“Eve, whether you like it or not you have shown me true glimpses of your heart.” Dimitri ignored her jab and reached out to cup her cheek with his gloved hand. “And that person you showed me in those moments is who I fell in love with.”

Eve didn’t reply but simply watched the prince with careful eyes as he caressed her cheek and tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear. He regarded her with a complicated look, one that was almost more frightening to Eve than if it had just been love in his eyes. It was as if Dimitri was truly looking at her, recognising her faults and holding her accountable for the questionable things she had done while all the while still cherishing the parts of her that weren’t deeply tarnished.

“I do not care for the Eve that was madly in love with her fiancée.” Dimitri said softly. “I do not care about the Eve that does not know how to ride a horse and lived sheltered by the church. The Eve that I told you I have fallen in love with is the one that you have allowed me to see despite your best efforts.”

“And who would that be?” Eve asked. “What have I told you that makes you think you know who I am?”

“I am not in love with your words because I know you lie.” Dimitri sighed. “I know that I know precious little about you. But what I fell in love with is your eyes when you talk about your brother, the fierce loyalty you have to House Fraldarius. I fell in love with the way you sing to flowers when you think no one is listening, the way you make tea when you don’t know what to do with your hands.”

“Dimitri, stop.” Eve pleaded. “Stop this madness. I am not whoever you think I am.”

“I realise now you were trying to push me away, trying to break my heart.” Dimitri smiled bitterly. “That is why you said all of that, why you have been meeting with Sylvain.”

“If you realise that, why do you still look at me like that?” Eve asked genuinely, confusion in her eyes and her voice. “You know so many terrible things I have done, yet why do you still look at me with those eyes?”

“I am sorry that my feelings for you have caused you such distress.” Dimitri’s eyes flitted between Eve’s and she could no longer read the look in them. Something had shifted, but what she could not discern. “Unfortunately, I cannot simply rid myself of my feelings as if extinguishing a candle.”

At this, Dimitri got up from the windowsill to stand before Eve. He looked down at her before gently bringing a hand to the back of her head and pulling her forward slowly. The movement took Eve by surprise and her first instinct was to cover her mouth with her hand, thinking back to the two times Felix had forcibly kissed her. But instead Dimitri bowed his head to bring his forehead to hers, his eyes closed as he breathed slowly. It was as if he were both savouring the moment and holding himself back from it at the very same time.

“I will never touch you without your consent.” Dimitri breathed, eyes still closed as he rested his head against hers. “I cannot cease to feel for you, but I will not force you to endure it either. If I am ever to bring a hand to you again it will be because you asked it of me, this I promise.”

* * *

It took Felix several days more to reach his breaking point than it did for Dimitri. In fact, it had taken Felix seeing some kind of improvement in the relationship between Eve and the boar prince to make him boil over. It wasn’t as if her nights with Sylvain had ceased, so Felix couldn’t understand why they seemed more amicable with each other.

But rather than take his issues to Eve, Felix decided to give Sylvain a piece of his mind. He had warned the idiot the price to pay for laying even a single finger on Eve, and Sylvain had ignored it. Felix refused to believe that Eve would have gone to Sylvain of her own accord, choosing instead to believe that he had somehow seduced or extorted her.

“Sylvain!” Felix shouted as he burst into the Gautier’s room one afternoon, nearly kicking the door from its hinges.

“If my door’s broken, you’re fixing it.” Sylvain looked up from the book he was reading to see Felix standing in the doorway, the anger apparent in his eyes. “Also, try to be quiet.”

At that, Sylvain motioned down and Felix finally took in the scene before him. Sylvain was sat upright in his bed, his uniform jacket tossed carelessly on the floor and his shirt unbuttoned. Beside him, wedged between him and the wall, was the sleeping form of Eve. She was tucked under Sylvain’s free arm, her head resting on his toned, bare stomach with one of her arms wrapped loosely around his hips.

“Mm, Sylvain.” She stirred in her sleep, pulling herself closer to him. “Too loud.”

“Sorry, kitten.” Sylvain brushed her hair back from her face, running his fingers through her hair to massage her scalp gently. “Felix apparently doesn’t know how to knock.”

“Tell him I’m sleeping.” She muttered, eyes still closed.

“What the hell is this?” Felix growled as he balled his fists at his sides. He was still having a hard time processing what he was seeing.

“You heard the lady,” Sylvain said, “she’s sleeping. Can you bother us later?”

Felix couldn’t stop himself when his fist flew to punch Sylvain in the jaw. Control be damned, Felix couldn’t stand it anymore.

“I said if you laid a finger on her, I’d kill you.” Felix hissed, grabbing Sylvain’s collar and dragging him out of his bed. “Did you think I was joking?”

Felix didn’t give Sylvain time to reply before he shoved him across the room. Sylvain stumbled to regain his balance but instead ended up crashing into his desk. By now, the ruckus had woken Eve from her nap, and she was on her feet and shielding Sylvain from Felix’s oncoming blow in seconds.

“That’s quite a right hook you’ve got there, Felix.” Sylvain half laughed, dabbing at the blood where Felix’s punch had split his lip.

“Sylvain are you okay?” Eve asked though she kept her eyes on Felix as she stood between them.

“Been better.” He said as he finally straightened, resting a reassuring hand on her shoulder as he continued. “But I’m alright, yeah.”

“Felix, what was that?” Eve threw up her hands in exasperation at the Fraldarius heir, bewilderment in her eyes.

“Are you really going to defend him?” Felix shot back. “After what he’s done to you?”

“What he’s done to me?” Eve laughed. “What are you, my father?”

“If only you knew the things she’s done to _me_.” Sylvain added with a laugh of his own and placed a hand on Eve’s hip. “Kitten, the way you move would make the Goddess herself blush.”

Felix wasn’t sure if he was going to scream or vomit, but either way he felt like he could rip Sylvain to shreds right then and there. He reached out to grab Eve’s wrist, snatching her away from Sylvain’s grasp. And as she was pulled forward, shock in her eyes, the collar of her shirt shifted to reveal a purple mark at the base of her neck.

“Tell me he didn’t do this.” Felix’s voice was dripping with malice as he pulled back her collar to point at the offending mark.

“And what if he did, Felix?” Eve asked, a surprising softness in her voice.

“Then I’ll kill him right here and now.” Felix replied without hesitation, eyes looking directly into Eve’s.

“Well, then I’m glad it wasn’t Sylvain.” Eve said with a small frown. “I’d hate to have been the reason he died.”

“Don’t lie to me.” Felix hissed.

“I’m not.” She shook her head.

“Well, it didn’t just appear out of nowhere, did it?” Felix’s brow furrowed.

“I’m not saying that.” Eve sighed. “I’m just saying it wasn’t Sylvain.”

“I was gonna say,” Sylvain cut in, craning his neck to look at Eve’s, “I don’t remember leaving a mark there.”

“Oh, then I guess it’s just there by magic, hm?” Felix asked sarcastically, finally releasing Eve’s collar to turn and grimace at Sylvain. “Don’t act innocent like I don’t know what you two have been doing.”

“Who’s acting innocent?” Eve asked and folded her arms.

“Then tell me who gave you that mark.” Felix pointed an accusatory finger towards Eve’s throat.

“Yuri.” She answered simply, unashamed.

“Do you just throw yourself at any man who you lay eyes on?” Felix scoffed to hide his wounded feelings. Had he misread their interactions? He had thought that there was something meaningful happening between the two of them, but could she be doing the same with every other male student at the Academy? He thought back to how she had said he never should have kissed her, and yet here she was giving her body to not just Sylvain but Yuri as well.

“Just Sylvain and Yuri.” She answered before adding after a pause, “Oh, and I suppose Balthus too.”

Felix opened his mouth to reply yet found himself unable to produce any words. What could he say? What was he feeling? He was hurt, he could tell that much. But he felt so many other things at the same time. Most of all he just didn’t understand Eve. What was her reasoning for all this? Why did she tell him he couldn’t kiss her? At first he had somewhat understood, but it made no sense that she would refuse his kisses while giving Sylvain, Yuri, and Balthus so much more.

“Why?” When he finally managed to speak, it was only one word that came out of Felix’s mouth.

“Why what?” Eve frowned. This rage, this hurt, had been exactly what she wanted from Felix. She had wanted him to abandon all feelings for her, and it was working. But then why did it hurt so much if this is what she had wanted? Seeing the look in his eyes, she wanted to take him into her arms, tell him she didn’t mean any of it and that she was sorry. And somehow that thought was even more terrifying to her because it meant that sooner or later she was going to have to confront herself about what she felt for Felix.

“Forget it.” Felix shook his head, uncharacteristically backing down.

And with that he turned and left Sylvain’s room, leaving the two of them to stand in shocked silence. There was nothing to say, nothing that could be said. Everything had gone according to plan, but only now did Eve realise that wasn’t what she really wanted. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dimitri said we respect women in this house.


	20. Nineteen

Sylvain and Eve didn’t talk about what happened after Felix had left the room. They had become friends ever since Sylvain found out about her crest. They joked with each other, spent time together, talked when the other needed it. But what made their friendship work was the unspoken agreement that they were each other’s escape. Eve didn’t ask Sylvain how he was feeling about his brother and the upcoming mission; Sylvain didn’t ask her what was going on with her, Dimitri, and Felix. And perhaps it was naïve and childish of them to simply avoid their problems, but they both used their relationship as a way to steal back what was theirs.

So instead of addressing the wyvern in the room, they simply returned to Sylvain’s bed. He took back up his book and Eve nestled once more under his arm. This time, however, she didn’t sleep. She knew there was no way she could rest or even close her eyes with all that was going through her mind.

Felix was abrasive. He was quick to anger, and he was never really good at expressing his feelings. Twice now he had kissed Eve without her consent. And even just moments before he had been rough in grabbing her away from Sylvain. All of this meant nothing, though, in the face of all else Eve saw in him.

He was hurt by the way his father abandoned him after Glenn’s death. Instead of being a father when Felix needed one most, Rodrigue had opened his arms to Dimitri as a surrogate son. As a result, he never truly dealt with the grief of losing Glenn. Eve saw this, and she knew that was why Felix shut off his feelings towards others. But despite all that it was still evident how deeply he cared for his friends. His harsh words for Dimitri were rooted in concern that one day he might snap. And though he often berated Sylvain and said how he wouldn’t flinch if he fell in battle, Felix would be the first to protect his friend on the battlefield. Eve saw through his cold exterior, through his feigned indifference. He was gentle with her when he would open up. And though he struggled, he did make an effort to display his feelings towards Eve.

_Is this how Dimitri sees me?_

The thought hit her like a tonne of bricks. Despite her best efforts, Dimitri saw through to her heart and loved what he found there. And despite Felix’s best efforts, she saw through to his heart as well. But did she love what she found there? Did she love Felix? It couldn’t be possible, could it? She barely knew him. But that wasn’t really the truth. If anyone knew him it was her. She had seen him grow up, had known him all his life. Eve had seen him fall in love with the blade, she had seen him when he would spar with his brother. She had watched him grow, mature. And she had seen the permanent frown find a way to his face when he lost the most important thing to him.

 _How dare you think you can love my brother when you abandoned me. He is the way he is now because of_ you _._

Eve shivered involuntarily at the voice that echoed in her mind. He was right, how could she? Felix was the way he was because of her. She had not been there when she was supposed to be; she did not save Glenn. 

Lambert.

Glenn.

The people of Duscur.

Her own family.

She didn’t save any of them. She had this crest and yet was unable to save any of the people that mattered. Even worse was Glenn had died knowing she could have saved him, he died knowing she was supposed to be there in Duscur.

* * *

It had been a spur of the moment decision, something in the pit of her stomach that made her say no. And she said this to him as they took a break from their sparring that night to walk around the Fraldarius estate.

“Glenn, I’m not going to Duscur with you.” Eve said, looking up at the night sky.

“What?” Glenn stopped in his tracks. “Why?”

“I feel like something’s happening.” Eve sighed and turned to face him. “I can’t explain it.”

“Is it something I said?” Glenn reached out to tuck a piece of Eve’s hair behind her ear.

Eve leaned in towards his touch, pressing her cheek to his hand that he let linger in her hair. He was always so considerate of her, even when she was making a nonsensical decision.

“I’m afraid if I leave Rodrigue will be in trouble.” Eve admitted after a pause. “I have no real reason to believe something will happen but…”

“It’s okay.” Glenn comforted with a smile. “At the end of the day your duty is to my father. If you’re worried, you should stay.”

Eve sighed again as they resumed their walk in silence. She could tell he was disappointed. He had been excited at the prospect of the two of them being able to go on a mission together. She was always by Rodrigue’s side, so whenever Glenn travelled he’d often have to leave her behind. But Rodrigue had agreed that now Glenn was getting closer to an age where he could take over as head of the house, it was important Eve got used to being with him. Although, to be fair, it wasn’t as if Eve and Glenn were unfamiliar at that point.

“When I get back,” Glenn started softly, barely audible, “we’ll tell my father the truth.”

“About what?” Eve asked, embarrassed to admit that there were so many truths she was hiding she wasn’t sure which one he meant.

“About us.” He turned to her, eyes ablaze with determination.

“We can’t do that.” Eve shook her head solemnly.

“Haven’t you been through enough?” Glenn asked. “You deserve to have a chance to love someone and have a family.”

“Glenn, you have a duty to uphold as the future heir of House Fraldarius.” Eve cupped his cheek in her hand, smiling bitterly.

“Does that duty stop me from being honest about how I feel for you?” Glenn frowned though he didn’t pull away from her touch.

“Ingrid truly loves you.” Eve said rather than answer his question.

“Ingrid’s a child.” Glenn laughed.

“If you turn your back on her you’re dooming her family to obsolescence.” Eve said softly.

“There are plenty of other nobles she can marry to save House Galatea.” Glenn shrugged. It was his indifference and frankness that Eve had fallen in love with, yet sometimes it could be so frustrating.

“Glenn, your father promised you to her.” Eve watched him carefully as he took the hand she held to his cheek in his own. “This isn’t the kind of thing you can just say ‘never mind’ to and go on about your day.”

“Kiko,” Glenn took hold of her chin when she avoided his eyes, forcing her to look at him, “why did you fall in love with me?”

“Don’t call me that outside.” Eve’s eyes flitted around, afraid anyone might overhear them.

“Don’t avoid the question, _Eve_.” Glenn put sarcastic emphasis on that name, tugging at her chin again to demand her gaze.

“You know why, Glenn.” Eve huffed. “Do you really want to do this right now?”

“Yes, I do.” Glenn smirked. “I want to hear you say it.”

“You don’t let other people define you.” Eve admitted after a moment. She knew exactly why he wanted her to say why she fell in love with him. And as much as Eve hated to lose to Glenn, she always let him win anyways. “Everyone said you couldn’t become a knight with your attitude, so you went and became one of the youngest knights in all of Faerghus. You’ve proven that you don’t have to be delicate or political to be a good leader. You gained the respect of your men on your own terms and I admire that about you.”

“You fell in love with my defiance, and yet you seek to reign it in?” Glenn grinned, placing a small kiss on the corner of Eve’s frowning mouth.

“But.” Eve interjected, looking directly into Glenn’s eyes now. “I also fell in love with your ability to know when to put your pride aside for the greater good. This is one of those moments, Glenn.”

“The greater good?” Glenn guffawed. “What are you, my father? That’s exactly the type of thing he’d say.”

“Your father is a good man.” Eve folded her arms, unamused at Glenn’s laughter.

“Maybe so,” he shrugged, “but he’s old fashioned.”

The two of them stared each other down, seemingly at an impasse. Eve knew there was nothing she could do to stop Glenn from revealing the nature of their relationship to Rodrigue. Once he set his mind to something, there was no stopping him. But she wished that just for once he’d think about the greater context of everything. Aside from the implications this would have for his engagement to Ingrid and the joining of the Fraldarius and Galatea families, Rodrigue knew the truth about Eve. And as kind as Rodrigue was, and for as much as he cared about her and Glenn, he would never approve of their relationship.

“You’ve already made up your mind, haven’t you?” Eve asked Glenn, her gaze softening. In the end, she would always bend for him.

“I hope you know this isn’t an impulse.” Glenn’s voice took on a gentler tone and they resumed their walking. “I’ve been thinking about this for months, about how to tell my father. This trip to Duscur is vital, and if I can prove myself on it then he’ll have no choice but to listen to what I have to say about us.”

“If it’s what you want, I’ll stand by you.” Eve nodded. She remembered that the first time she had found herself feeling that way about Glenn, she had been terrified. There was no one else she had ever thought she’d put her feelings and agendas aside for. But now she would willingly tell anyone with ears about her crest if Glenn had wished it.

That was one of the last times they ever spoke. Of course, their relationship was still secret when he left, so she only saw him briefly as he and his men departed for Duscur. She wished she had kissed him or told him a proper farewell or gone with him like she should have in the first place. But how was she to know? The growing anxiety that was stewing in the pit of her stomach wasn’t a premonition of something happening to Rodrigue, but to Glenn. She had stayed behind because of it, but that feeling was exactly why she should have gone to Duscur.

When the news reached Fraldarius, Eve was almost certain that she had died right then and there. Her throat burned and she lost all vision and she felt as if she were walking on hot coals. It wasn’t until hours later she realised the burning in her throat was because she hadn’t stopped screaming since the messenger arrived and her loss of vision was on account of the tears that were spilling from her eyes. And it took even longer to realise the pain in her feet was from running off into the woods without her shoes. She woke up the next morning on the forest floor cold and wet and alone and found that she would have much rather slept for all of eternity than return to a world without Glenn.

* * *

Eve hadn’t thought much about the night she lost Glenn in the past few years. It had been so much easier to avoid it, to act as if it were some long-lost memory. But now that her mind was stuck in the past, Eve was feeling all of that pain all over again. She had not only lost her love, but also her confidant. She lost the only person who had known the whole truth about her. And while it was so much easier to live the lies, Eve found herself afraid that if no one else knew her she might eventually forget who she used to be.

As Eve thought this, she looked up at Sylvain who was busy reading his book. On the surface, he appeared to be a simple man of simple pleasures. Sylvain certainly tried his hardest to get people to expect nothing of him despite his talents. But in the small amount of time that she had gotten to know him, Eve found Sylvain to be trustworthy and empathetic. And while they both had their ulterior motives with each other, they were honest about them. So what was the harm in being just a little more honest?

“Sylvain?” Eve asked tentatively, somewhat hoping he wouldn’t hear her, as she propped herself up on her elbow to look at him.

“What’s up?” He moved his chin slightly in her direction to show he was listening but kept his eyes on the page he was reading.

“I want to tell you something.” She said, each word another nail in her coffin. “And I’m fairly certain you’ll hate me afterwards, but I want to tell you all the same.”

“You better not be in love with me.” He flashed her a grin, finally looking at her with mischief in his eyes.

“You wish.” She half laughed, now reminded why it was Sylvain that she had to tell. If she could tell anyone and have a chance at them treating her the same, it was Sylvain.

“But, ah,” Sylvain scratched the back of his neck, “if it’s something serious you can tell me. I’m not the best guy for serious talks, but if you want me to listen I will.”

“Thank you.” Eve nodded as she pushed herself up to sit straight.

And without thinking, she spoke the words that had been locked away in her heart for so long. She told Sylvain about her family, about her home; she told him her real name. She told him about her loyalty to House Fraldarius and the unique way in which she lost Glenn. It was not the full truth she told Sylvain, but it was a start. It was a step in the right direction towards living an honest life. And for some reason beyond her, Eve found hope that perhaps one day soon she could live a life without lying to everyone she knew. It was a selfish and naïve hope, but one she found herself clinging to nonetheless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I know the game never says anything about Glenn’s age or how much older he is than Felix. In my mind, I figured he’s considerably older but not so much older that it’d be weird he was engaged to Ingrid. My reasoning is Sylvain is older than the other childhood friends, but he doesn’t mention ever being as close with Glenn. So I’d put Glenn around the same age as Miklan rather than around Sylvain’s age. Sylvain says Miklan knew what his birth meant for him from, like, day one. So I imagine Miklan was at least of an age where he could have that kind of cognitive capacity. Maybe 5 years old? So that’d put Glenn at around 5 years older than Sylvain. Making him 20 or 21 around the tragedy of Duscur?


	21. Twenty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning there is some mild spice at the end of this chapter. Nothing NSFW of explicit, but I just wanna air on the side of caution.

Eve.

No, Tsukiko.

Tsukiko…

It wasn’t a name Sylvain had ever heard before. She did say she wasn’t actually from Fodlan, but she didn’t name her homeland. It wasn’t the kind of name you’d find in Almyra or Sreng or Duscur, so she had to be from somewhere even further outside their borders.

Sylvain felt conflicted as he thought about all he had just been told. Eve, Tsukiko, it didn’t matter her name—she was a liar. From the beginning she had lied to him and all the other Blue Lions, and Sylvain couldn’t help the deep-seated rage that he felt about being lied to. At the same time, though, she had been ordered to lie by the church, by Seteth and Lady Rhea. And after hearing how Lady Rhea dealt with those involved with Lonato’s uprising and the incident at the Holy Mausoleum, Sylvain could completely understand why Eve—no, Tsukiko—wouldn’t want to defy the Archbishop’s orders.

But it was a small source of comfort to Sylvain that His Highness had known some semblance of the truth from the very beginning. For what it was worth, she hadn’t been lying to His Highness and she had never wanted to lie to the others. She had made sure to say that His Highness had always known about her crest and her fealty to House Fraldarius. And that every personal thing she did share with him was true—she just never shared very much.

Then there was the issue of her connection to House Fraldarius—specifically Glenn and Felix. It was clear to Sylvain now that Felix was in love with Eve and that whether she was going to admit it or not, she also had feelings for the younger Fraldarius. But Tsukiko had loved Glenn and Glenn had loved her enough to intend to break off his engagement to Ingrid. Sylvain couldn’t help but wonder if whatever Eve was feeling for Felix was just a projection of what she used to feel for Glenn. He knew that Felix already felt like he was living in Glenn’s shadow. And Sylvain couldn’t imagine what it would feel like for him to find out that the girl he loved only saw him as his brother.

None of that mattered in the end, though. She had made it clear to Sylvain that she would still marry Dimitri, that she would never betray His Highness. And though Sylvain now knew her to be a liar, he believed her. All of Eve’s lies were about who she was and her own past. It appeared to him that she never lied about her loyalties and that she didn’t lie to be malicious. And in a way Sylvain found himself trusting Eve because he saw himself in her. Her entire life had been dictated by her crest, forced to live a certain way because of what others expected of her. Lady Rhea expected her to be her pawn, His Highness expected her to keep her promise of being a good wife, Felix expected her to return his feelings. He supposed that was why she chose to tell him the truth despite knowing he would probably be angry with her for lying to him; she knew Sylvain expected nothing of her and that was exactly what she wanted.

But where did he go from here? Sylvain had no problem keeping Eve’s—Tsukiko’s—secrets for as long as they weren’t harmful to his friends. But what did he do with this newfound knowledge? What had she hoped to gain by telling him all of this? It was clear that there was more she was still hiding, so what was the point of revealing a partial truth? If all she wanted was to have someone know the truth, why not tell Felix or His Highness? It made more sense to Sylvain to share the truth with someone she would have to share the rest of her life with anyways. So the fact that she picked Sylvain to tell must have had some meaning, there had to be something more she hadn’t shared yet that she wouldn’t have wanted to tell Dimitri. Or perhaps Sylvain was overthinking it all and there was no rhyme or reason to Eve’s decision. Whoever she was, she wasn’t a threat as it currently stood. And since thinking wasn’t particularly one of Sylvain’s strong suits, he simply elected not to. Eve was fun to be around and she was loyal to both Felix and His Highness; that was all that mattered. And remembering the look of relief on her face when she told him about herself, Sylvain wondered if perhaps there wasn’t some bigger truth she was hiding. Eve was just a girl who was living a lie at the church’s behest. And so like with other freedoms she and Sylvain had stolen back for themselves, she divulged in the truth with him as her little rebellion—nothing more.

* * *

Eve dreamt for what felt like the first time in months that night. She dreamt of home, of the day she left for Fodlan. And then her dreams shifted to warmth and happiness and someone by her side. Others found him rough around the edges, and it was true he was harsh. But Eve admired his wit and his unfaltering resolve. If he believed something to be right and just, he would stick to it regardless of what those around him said. And as her dream continued and the warmth spread through Eve’s chest, she turned to face the man beside her. But his face was different than she remembered, similar yet just slightly different.

“Felix?” Eve awoke from her dream, confused. She could have sworn she was dreaming of Glenn, but when she saw his face it was Felix’s that looked back at her.

She lay there in her bed, staring at the ceiling, as she fought the urge to consider what she was feeling. She was afraid of what might happen if she explicitly thought about her relationship with Felix and how she felt about it. On the one hand, it didn’t matter what she felt. Regardless of how anyone felt, she was going to marry Dimitri. She had a duty to fulfil and she didn’t want to betray the prince who cared so much for her. Years ago she had forfeited her right to her own feelings, so what did it matter if she figured out what they were?

On the other hand, however, Eve felt she owed it to the younger Fraldarius to sort out her emotions. It wasn’t fair to him if she pulled him along playing a tantalising game of hot and cold that left him with whiplash. And not only that, but it also wasn’t fair to Glenn’s memory if she didn’t take the time to discern what were her residual feelings for him and what she was actually feeling for Felix.

Eve had initially hoped that she could dismiss how she felt about Felix as simply a result of how similar he was to his brother. But when she truly thought about it, as she was doing now, she realised that couldn’t be the case. Sure, Felix reminded her greatly of his brother and brought painful memories to mind of how she lost him. But at the same time, she realised that the feelings she had for Glenn and the feelings she was having for Felix were not the same.

For Glenn, Eve would have done anything. He was the only person she had ever met that she put aside her own ulterior motives for. She couldn’t lie to him, couldn’t defy him. But with Felix it was different. Eve didn’t feel that same overwhelming alliance to the younger Fraldarius. She was still hiding plenty from him and intended to keep it that way. That didn’t mean she didn’t care for him, though. She thought back to when he kissed her in the infirmary after the Goddess’ Rite of Rebirth, to the way her heart blossomed and she hadn’t wanted to pull away. And just that evening when she saw the hurt and betrayal in Felix’s eyes it pained her to no end. Eve had thought she was resilient enough to put aside her feelings for her duty, but that wasn’t truly the case—she knew that much now.

“Goddess,” Eve whispered out loud, “what do I do? My duty and my heart are at odds. I wish you were here; I wish you could tell me what path to take.”

Only silence answered Eve’s impassioned plea. It had been so long since she had spoken to the Goddess, and the lack of response reminded her exactly why she had stopped praying. No one answered her prayers—not when she lost everything, not when she was forced to rewrite her history. Eve had always had to be her own deliverance, and now was no exception.

Silently, Eve stood from her bed and padded over to the door. She paused with her hand over the knob, faltering. What was she even going to do? And whatever it was, did she have any right to be doing it? Eve cast away her doubts and grabbed a shawl as an afterthought to drape over her shoulders as she went out into the night. The air was chilly and the stones beneath her bare feet were like ice. She was always amazed at how cold it could get in the evenings at Garreg Mach. But none of that was a deterrent for her as she strode down to the opposite side of the dormitories and up the stairs.

Three doors at the end of the hall beckoned her. Behind one was reason, the other temptation, and the final one escape. Even now as she approached, Eve wasn’t sure which door she was going to stop at. At least that’s what she thought. Subconsciously, though, she knew there was only one answer—only one door that she had come here to knock upon.

“Felix?” She whispered into the crack between the door and its frame, lips forming around the sound as if it were sin itself.

For a moment, there was no response and Eve wondered if the Goddess had listened and was giving her an opportunity to turn away from this madness. But then the still night air was disturbed by a creak and the striking of a match followed shortly after by Felix opening the door.

“What are you doing here?” He whispered, though his lowered tone did nothing to disguise the anger in his voice.

“I know you don’t want to see me right now.” Eve cast her eyes downward. “But I’d like to talk to you.”

Felix said nothing and instead looked at Eve with a menagerie of emotions flitting through his eyes.

“Please.” She breathed when he continued to regard her with silence.

Wordless still, Felix simply stepped back and opened the door a fraction wider to allow for Eve to slip into his quarters. He closed the door behind her softly and Eve could feel the tension in the room even with her back to him. Only several hours ago she had broken his heart and now here she stood without any clear notion of why.

“What do you want?” Felix finally spoke, his voice still quiet yet dripping with malice.

“I have no feelings for Sylvain, you know.” She started slowly, deliberately, trying to figure out what it was exactly that she was trying to say.

“Why should that concern me?” Felix spat.

“And for what it’s worth I have no feelings for Balthus or Yuri either.” She spun around to face him, the moonlight filtering through the window illuminating Felix’s face just enough for her to see the pain on it.

“So, you’re just some common whore, are you?” Felix squinted at her and folded his arms.

“I don’t expect you to understand.” Eve shook her head lightly. “My body is the one thing in my life I have control over. Can you blame me for seeking simple pleasures in the only way I can?”

“I suppose it’s got nothing to do with me.” He grimaced.

“I imagine you felt confused as to why I said you shouldn’t kiss me even though I was doing all those things with other men…” Eve trailed off and bit her lip. “And it’s because the difference between you and everyone else is I have feelings for you.”

Eve looked into Felix’s eyes to see him seemingly struggling to keep something from bursting forth. It was as if he both wanted and didn’t want to believe what she was saying.

“What are you saying?” He finally managed, his voice barely audible.

“I’m saying I pushed you away because I was afraid of what I’m feeling for you.” Eve took a step forward, pausing when Felix flinched at the movement.

“You’re marrying the boar.” Felix said, though it was obvious to both of them that wasn’t what he truly wanted to say.

“That doesn’t change what I’m feeling.” Eve shook her head, a voice in the back of her mind begging the Goddess to smite her there and then before she went too far.

“And what are you feeling?” Felix challenged, swallowing as Eve closed the distance between them.

Eve still couldn’t put words to her feelings even to herself, so she opted to use actions to show her affections for Felix. She placed one hand on the back of his head, shielding it from impact when she used her other hand and the weight of her body to shove him into the door. And before he could protest her lips were on his, cutting off any words of reason either of them might say.

It didn’t take long for Felix to begin to reciprocate Eve’s kiss. His arms that had been frozen to his side finally moved as he placed one hand on the small of Eve’s back and the other on her hip, pulling her closer to him. His kiss was overly eager and rough, and Eve could tell he was inexperienced. But she felt as if she were losing her mind in his scent, her fingers tangled into his hair.

“You’re almost as bad with words as I am.” Felix gasped as Eve kissed his jaw before gently nibbling his earlobe.

“Shut up.” Eve straightened to look Felix directly in the eye, commanding him before crashing her lips back down to his.

As they kissed, Felix took the opportunity to switch their positions, turning swiftly to slam Eve against the solid wooden door. Her head hit the surface with a dull thud, but neither of them were focused enough to notice. And only when Felix began to grind into Eve with primal want did some semblance of reason return to her.

“Felix.” She breathed, grabbing his shoulders to gently push him away from her. “We have to stop here.”

“What do you mean?” Confusion flitted through his lust-clouded eyes.

“I don’t want you thinking my feelings are insincere.” Eve explained, and though it was true it was once again only a partial truth that she told him. “I don’t want you thinking I see you the same way I see Sylvain or Yuri or Balthus.”

Felix’s eyes clouded at the mention of men who knew her more intimately than he, but he ultimately nodded. “I understand.”

“Goodnight, Felix.” Eve whispered, placing a gentle kiss on his lips.

“Goodnight.” He nodded, still clearly in a daze from the events that had just transpired.

With a small smile, Eve left Felix’s room and closed the door behind her silently. As she turned to go back down the hall to the stairs, she froze as she met the gaze of none other than Dimitri.

“I heard a noise.” He swallowed with effort, jaw set as he regarded Eve with her scarlet lips and tousled hair. “I wanted to make sure everything was okay.”

“Dimitri, I—” Eve reached out to him, but he was already turning away towards his room.

“Goodnight, Eve.”


	22. Twenty-One

Dimitri shut the door behind himself gently, walking a few silent paces away before turning back to stare at it. At first there was only silence until he could hear the soft padding of Eve’s bare feet on the floor. He watched her shadow from the gap at the bottom of his door as it came ever closer. As she came to a stop, Dimitri almost felt as if she could see him through the heavy wood; as though there were no barrier between them. He heard a rustle and her shadow shifted as if she had reached out to knock but stopped just short of it. Another rustle and a small sigh, but no knock and Dimitri let out a breath he didn’t notice he was holding. After another moment of silence, Eve’s shadow retreated until eventually Dimitri could no longer see it or hear her footsteps in the hall.

When he was sure she was gone, Dimitri finally returned to his bed and laid down though he knew he would not find sleep for the remainder of the night. All he could think of was the way she looked as she left Felix’s room. Her cheeks had been flushed and there was a ghost of a smile on her lips. She looked… happy.

Eve had given Dimitri genuine smiles and laughs before, but he knew she was never happy. There was always a quiet misery behind her eyes that he recognised because he was sure that same misery was hidden in his own. They could both put on a face for however long they needed to, but they were not happy.

She was happy with Felix, though.

Dimitri sat up, holding his hands out in front of him to look at them. In the moonlight they were as pale as a pegasus’ wings; with the naked eye you could not see the blood that his hands were drenched with. Selfishly, he had hoped that helping Eve would help him scrub some of the crimson that stained his hands. When they first met and Rodrigue asked him to accept the proposal, he thought that saving Eve would allow him to continue living. He was the only one who could help her escape a life of captivity; by marrying her he could give her freedom. But he had been a fool to believe that his existence could be anything but a curse to those around him. Eve would never be happy with a monster like him, he should have known. And now rather than liberation, he provided her only pain with their marriage that would keep her away from the one she truly loved.

_“It’s got nothing to do with Felix.”_

Her words echoed in his mind from when she first rejected his proclamation of love.

 _“I don’t have the right to love someone again._ ”

He should have known that was a lie. Eve was a liar, but not only that there was no way that someone like her would have the same feelings he did. He couldn’t imagine that this girl who dedicated her life to protecting House Fraldarius would have ever done anything to reach the level of damnation he had where she felt she no longer had the right to love.

Dimitri laid back down, letting his head sink into his pillow as his mind sunk into his thoughts. With one hand, he gripped the fabric of his shirt just above his heart. He thought he could handle seeing Eve with other men. After all, he had promised her that he would not force her to endure his love. He had thought that the knowledge that he was the one she would marry would help ease the pain. And for Sylvain that had been the case. But now Dimitri realised that was perhaps because he was certain neither one had any amorous feelings for the other. Felix was a whole other matter; Dimitri had seen the way Felix looked at Eve. There was no doubt in his mind that Felix harboured romantic intentions towards Eve. And now Dimitri could see that Eve returned those feelings.

He wished more than anything that he could dispose of his love for Eve as easily as he disposed of enemies upon the battlefield. But navigating a heart’s desires was far more difficult than swinging a lance. Eve had been correct in that their arrangement would be worlds easier if they could just be friends. Dimitri had relished the brief period between when their initial awkwardness subsided and when he confessed his love where they had been able to enjoy each other’s company. They had taken tea together often in her room and chatted about simple things. He remembered particularly fondly one afternoon when Eve excitedly recounted to him one of the stories she was reading, only realising after she finally took a brief pause that Dimitri had already read that book. It was perhaps the only time he had seen embarrassment on her face which was quite endearing considering how often she was so sure of herself. Even then Dimitri had been in love with her, he just hadn’t yet put a name to the flutter in his heart when he saw the blush upon her cheeks.

Morning arrived much sooner than Dimitri had anticipated and no sooner than the sun started filtering its first rays into his quarters did he hear a knock at his door. He was hesitant to answer it, half expecting it to be Eve. Whenever she did something, she always had words to explain it away. This time, however, he didn’t think he could face whatever justifications she gave. But just as Dimitri was deciding to ignore the knock, it sounded again accompanied this time with a voice.

“Your Highness.” It was Seteth at his door. And by the tone of his voice it was something important.

“One moment!” He cleared his throat to call out, rushing out of bed to put his uniform on hastily.

“Lady Rhea would like to speak to you in her audience room.” Seteth said when Dimitri opened the door.

Dimitri nodded and swallowed a lump that was forming in his throat as he followed Seteth down the hall. He wondered what could possibly be so important that Seteth couldn’t wait to collect him until at least after breakfast. As they walked, he tried his best to comb his hair into place with his fingers and straighten his uniform to be at least semi-presentable in the company of the Archbishop.

“Dimitri, I’m glad you’re here.” Rhea smiled warmly when he came to her audience chamber. He immediately felt some of his anxieties quell just from the calming atmosphere Lady Rhea exuded. And he half wondered why Eve would harbour such animosity towards such a kind and benevolent woman before he remembered how she had dealt with those who were captured after the Goddess’ Rite of Rebirth.

“Lady Rhea.” Dimitri bowed politely, looking up after a moment to ask, “what is it you need of me?”

“We are waiting for one more party to arrive.” Rhea answered with a smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

At that, the door opened to reveal Jeralt who was speaking in low tones with Eve who stood beside him. She was still in her bedclothes, a shawl wrapped around her shoulders in a shoddy attempt at modesty.

“How dare you come before the Archbishop in such a state!” Seteth balked as Eve came to stand beside Dimitri.

“You had Jeralt wake me up.” She said, clearly annoyed, and it appeared to Dimitri that she truly had been sleeping when she was summoned. “You would’ve had my hide for being late if I took the time to change. It was lose-lose for me.”

“It is alright, Seteth.” Rhea said through a tight smile.

“So, what do you want?” Eve asked, ever blunt with the Archbishop. Dimitri truly wondered if there was some kind of history there that he was missing. To his knowledge she had never been to Garreg Mach before their engagement. And she had been living under Rodrigue’s protection away from the church so there was no way Lady Rhea could have known Eve previously.

“I have gathered you both here to discuss your engagement.” Rhea said, motioning between the two of them. “I have come to the decision that the two of you will be wed at Garreg Mach.”

Dimitri’s brow furrowed. Why here? It didn’t make much sense for them to wed at the monastery. And it was confusing that Rhea would tell them this now when they still had much of the academic year to get through before they graduated.

“Forgive me, Lady Rhea,” Dimitri started, “but would it not make more sense for us to wed in Fhirdiad? To my knowledge every King of Faerghus before me has been married in the capital.”

“That is true,” Rhea nodded, “but these are special circumstances. After careful consideration I have decided that rather than wait until your graduation, your wedding will be held the day after the ball celebrating the establishment of Garreg Mach.”

“What?” Eve’s voice was shrill, cutting through the chamber before Dimitri even had the chance to open his mouth. “Are you joking? That’s in four months, Rhea.”

“That’s Lady Rhea to you.” Seteth interjected.

“What purpose does it serve for us to get married that soon?” Eve asked, her anger apparent in her features. And though Dimitri probably should have been thinking of the implications of the Archbishop’s proposal, all he could think about was if the idea of marrying him was truly that repugnant to Eve.

“Recent events have made it clear to us that there is some kind of plot against the Church of Seiros.” Seteth explained as Lady Rhea looked on. “Your marriage would be a display of unity between the church and the Kingdom that could dissuade those who might plan to attack the monastery.”

“I’m not your pawn.” Eve said through clenched teeth. “This marriage is between Dimitri and I; you don’t get to decide the terms and conditions.”

“You forget that this union required my approval.” Rhea answered. “Or have you forgotten how much Lord Rodrigue sacrificed for you?”

Dimitri watched in stunned silence as Eve stepped forward, her fists clenched at her sides.

“You want to punish me? Fine.” Eve hissed and motioned behind her towards the prince. “But you have no right to drag Dimitri into this.”

“Punish you?” Rhea smiled another one of her smiles that didn’t touch her eyes. “Dear child, what would I be punishing you for?”

To Dimitri’s surprise, Eve snapped her mouth shut and cast a wary eye his way. She had never been one to bite her tongue, especially not with Lady Rhea or Seteth. In fact, Eve had always been exceedingly vocal about her disdain for the two of them. It was why Dimitri had handled talking to Seteth after the incident last month. So why now did she stand there in silence? Whatever it was that she thought the Archbishop was punishing her for, it was yet another piece of her past that she wouldn’t let Dimitri see.

“How can you live with yourself?” Eve asked, a chilling sincerity to her tone. “You use Dimitri as a bargaining chip to silence me. He’s just a boy, Rhea. You can’t just toy with people’s lives to get what you want.”

“Now then, who exactly is using Dimitri?” Rhea asked with a slight tilt of her head.

“Eve, does it really matter when we get married?” Dimitri interjected before Eve could reply to the Archbishop’s question. “We knew it would happen eventually.”

“Yes, Dimitri, it matters.” Eve turned to face him with real concern in her eyes. Yet all he could envision was the way she had looked the night before leaving Felix’s room. “You deserve a chance to live your life as a young man before becoming a husband or a king.”

Relief washed over him as he saw the earnestness in her eyes. At the very least she wasn’t repulsed by him, wasn’t opposing this decision because she hated him. And if he reached, if he allowed himself a small delusion, he could say she opposed this because she cared for him.

“Rhea, enough of this, please.” Eve turned back to the Archbishop. “Don’t you think Dimitri’s been through enough without you using him as a pawn to get to me?”

“So hasty are we to point fingers to deflect from our own wrongdoing.” Rhea sighed as if disappointed by Eve’s outburst.

“I-!” Eve started to fight back before turning to look at Dimitri and cutting herself off. “If I agree to this, if I marry Dimitri in four months’ time, will you leave him alone? Will you leave him out of this conflict between you and I?”

Rhea considered this for a moment, looking at Eve as if regarding a petulant child. Dimitri looked between the two of them, feeling increasingly as though this truly had nothing to do with him. He was caught in between two forces opposing each other over something he had no knowledge of.

“Very well.” Finally, the Archbishop spoke. “If you accept this condition and continue to act on your best behaviour, I will not interfere any more in your marriage.”

“Then I accept.” Eve said firmly, lifting her chin to give Rhea one last defiant look. And with that, she turned on her heel and left the chamber, pausing only to meet Dimitri’s eyes briefly as she passed him. In her gaze, he saw something complicated that he feared she would never be able to explain to him. And for a moment he was able to forget all she had done to hurt him. In this instance, she had put aside her anger for the Archbishop to protect him. For some reason beyond him, she chose him over her own agenda. So deep within his heart, a small flame of hope ignited at the possibility that Eve had done this out of love for him. That somewhere inside her complicated heart, she loved him.


	23. Twenty-Two

Byleth made a point of spending time with her students. Whether it was training after class, relaxing at the sauna, sharing meals, or taking tea, she dedicated most of her free time to them. At first, it had been to gain their trust. She was a stranger and by no means an actual professor, so she understood that the Blue Lions were wary of her. But slowly it became a habit. She found it was a good way to boost morale and gauge how her students felt about her and each other. Not to mention she remembered how happy it had made Jeralt, saying something or another about her ‘hanging around kids her own age’ as if she were a child. Though, she did have to remind herself to ask her father how old she was if she wanted Seteth to stop bothering her about it.

But of all her students, Byleth spent the most time with Dimitri. As the Blue Lions’ leader, he was often privy to information she wasn’t when it came to his peers. They trusted him with their issues and their complaints, and he would dutifully relay them to the professor. And he was often a reliable source when it came to the other students at the Officer’s Academy.

So on the afternoon of one of her free days, Byleth found Dimitri in the Knight’s Hall as usual and invited him to tea. He seemed preoccupied; however, his chivalry would not allow him to decline her invitation and he followed her out into the garden. She had prepared his favourite tea, which took asking Ingrid and Eve to discern, and had even had the forethought this time to bring some pastries from the town below. Byleth felt slightly guilty at times that she was essentially using Dimitri for information, so she thought the least she could do was give him sweets in return.

The two chatted politely for some time about this or that. Dimitri was a fairly simple conversational partner, though Byleth was still getting used to the whole ‘talking to other people’ thing. She and Jeralt hardly had to speak to each other, it didn’t come naturally to her. Byleth became acutely aware of her lack of conversational skills when she brought up some gossip she had overheard about a couple in the courtyard. She had thought it would be the type of light-hearted thing Dimitri wouldn’t mind talking about. But instead this conversation topic seemed to upset him.

Deciding the small talk was going nowhere, Byleth decided to ask Dimitri what she really wanted to know. She was curious how the Blue Lions felt about yet another mission in Kingdom territory. How was Sylvain actually holding up? She hadn’t caught him trying to sneak out to the town at night lately which was somehow more concerning. Byleth also wanted to know what Dimitri thought about recruiting new students to the Blue Lions. Linhardt had asked to join her class after she did a guest lecture for the Black Eagles one day when Manuela was particularly hungover. He claimed her class was the only one he hadn’t fallen asleep during, so he wanted to join the Blue Lions. She also had her eye on Ferdinand to bolster the cavalry units in her class. If she could get him to join her class, she could have Dimitri go back to being on foot where he could be with Eve as it seemed he was on edge having to be so far from her on the battlefield. And she was also considering Lysithea as a possible recruit, she was incredibly talented with magic and had some of the sharpest wit Byleth had ever seen.

But her questions seemed to fall on deaf ears. Dimitri would politely nod now and again, but his answers seemed vague at best. Byleth could tell there was something weighing heavy on the prince’s mind. She could hear Sothis noting that while Dimitri often seemed troubled, he was usually quite good at hiding it.

“Dimitri.” Byleth cut herself off in the middle of what she was saying.

“Yes?” He blinked, looking up from his tea.

“Something is on your mind.” Byleth stated.

“I assure you; it is nothing.” Dimitri smiled, forcing back his princely front.

“I’m your professor.” Byleth pressed. “You can come to me with anything.”

Dimitri seemed to struggle with something as Byleth watched. Finally, he spoke up, “may I speak freely, Professor?”

“Of course.” Byleth nodded.

“How do you conceal your emotions so thoroughly?” Dimitri asked with a small frown on his face. “I feel I am often far too affected by my own emotions.”

Byleth frowned at this. She had no doubt heard how others spoke of her emotionlessness and how it was often unsettling. She had even once overheard her own father speaking to some mercenaries about how much it pained him the first time she ever took a life, the way she didn’t even flinch. So it was puzzling to her that anyone would want to emulate her lack of emotions.

“Perhaps the boy has fallen in love with someone who is not his fiancée.” Sothis provided.

Byleth thought on this proposition briefly. It could be reasonable that Dimitri would have avoided bringing the topic up with her if the issue was one of love. But then again, she never saw him interact with anyone in a way that could be construed as romantic. Dimitri was kind, chivalrous, and polite, but he held everyone at an arm’s length. The only person he couldn’t do that to was Eve. Regardless of whatever circumstances led to their engagement, Dimitri and Eve were linked together.

“Why would you want to conceal your emotions?” Byleth asked, taking a sip of her tea. “I would expect something like this from Felix rather than yourself.”

Dimitri flinched at the mention of his childhood friend, though nearly imperceivably.

 _So it has something to do with Felix_ , Byleth thought. She knew the two often butted heads, but things never really escalated past a few snide remarks from Felix.

“I am afraid I have graced someone with the unpleasant honour of being the recipient of my affections.” Dimitri spoke into his teacup.

“Speak plainly, Dimitri.” Byleth said, brow furrowed.

“I’ve… fallen in love.” Byleth was distracted from Dimitri’s words by Sothis’ gloating at her accurate prediction.

“I see.” Byleth replied, not sure what else she could say. She could help with any number of issues from battle strategy to weapon maintenance but matters of love were completely out of her scope.

“I apologise for troubling you with something so juvenile, Professor. Please forget I said anything.” Dimitri shook his head as if to shake the very thoughts from his mind.

“How can I help you?” Byleth asked. She might not know enough to come up with any solutions on her own, but perhaps she could be of some assistance to Dimitri regardless.

“I…” Dimitri trailed off. He looked as if he were scolding himself for something. It was rather uncharacteristic of the prince to be like this.

“If I can help, let me know.” Byleth urged.

“I have a rather selfish request.” Dimitri sighed finally.

“I’ll be the judge of that.” Byleth replied.

“I would like to ask that for future battles you pair me with Eve.” Dimitri bowed his head slightly. Byleth wondered why he would find this selfish given she had prior shared her intentions to do just that until he continued on, “and if possible separate us from Felix.”

“Felix?” Byleth frowned at this stipulation.

“I worry Felix has fallen in love with my fiancée.” Dimitri admitted with a low voice, clearly anxious at the prospect of being overheard.

Byleth blinked once, twice. She supposed stranger things had happened. But the idea of Felix falling in love with anyone was rather bizarre to her. Though, if it had to be anyone, she wasn’t surprised it was Eve. Eve was the only person other than the professor herself that Felix couldn’t beat in a sparring match. It made sense that he would grow affectionate towards someone who shared his love for the blade.

“If it is too much to ask, please forget I said anything.” Dimitri said when Byleth didn’t immediately respond.

“No, it’s no worry.” Byleth shook her head lightly. “Of course I will have to apply it on a case-by-case basis, but I will keep your request in mind when I make our battle strategies.”

The relief was apparent in Dimitri’s eyes and Byleth became exceedingly curious as to what the situation was between him and Felix. She didn’t concern herself with student gossip, but it was rare for something to affect Dimitri of all people. And at the behest of Sothis who was desperate for entertainment, Byleth decided that she would invite Eve to tea later to discern more about the situation.

* * *

Claude was the only person who noticed the wyvern tail peeking over the edge of the cathedral roof that afternoon. And truthfully, he had only happened to look up that high by chance while wondering how long it had taken to construct such a tall building. With nothing better to do, he decided he had to figure out why there was a wyvern on the roof.

It took very little convincing to get Hilda to shirk her sky patrol responsibilities onto him, and very quickly he was saddled up and ready to fly.

To his surprise, it wasn’t just the wyvern that was up there. There, taking a nap in the beast’s shadow, was His Princeliness’ little fiancée. She had an open book resting on her face, but there was no mistaking who she was. For one, she was the only female student Claude knew who wore trousers. But there was also no mistaking that hair of hers that was even darker than the night itself.

“Eve?” He called out to her as he coaxed his wyvern to land on the roof. Even for him it was a difficult manoeuvre and he wondered how someone who allegedly had no flying experience managed it.

“Who.” It wasn’t a question, more a demand as to who dared wake her from her nap. “Is there not one place in this stupid monastery where I can take a nap in peace?”

“How did you get up here?” Claude laughed as she lifted the book on her face to give him a disgruntled glare.

“Wyvern has a mind of its own.” She squinted in the sunlight at him as she finally sat up. “Got stuck up here, figured I’d take a nap.”

“Hm.” Claude walked over to her wyvern where it sat. It seemed very well-behaved, sitting patiently while she had been napping. Any wyvern he’d known would have left her up here if she didn’t have control over it. “Is that so?”

He glanced at her from the corner of his eye, raising a single eyebrow questioningly. She didn’t seem bothered by his challenge, busy placing a ribbon to mark her place in her book and reaching for a wineskin that was tied to the wyvern’s saddle.

“Want some?” She gestured the canteen towards him after taking a swig.

“You really want to be drinking wine when you’ve got to somehow fly this wyvern you can’t control back down?” Claude asked and came to sit beside her.

“It’s just Ailell pomegranate juice.” She replied, taking another sip and yet again offering the skin to him.

Claude accepted this time, taking a swig of the tart juice. It was slightly warm from sitting in the sun, but still enjoyable. As he drank, he stole a glance at Eve who was looking out on the horizon. She was an interesting one, there was no doubt about that. Finding out about her crest and about how her initial story was all a lie only served to add to her intrigue. And there was no doubt in Claude’s mind that she would be valuable in reaching his goals. He just had to get his foot in the door, establish some kind of rapport with her outside of the friendly conversations they shared every once in a while.

“You’re not from Fodlan, are you?” He turned his head to look at her, gauging her reaction. He had half expected her to deny or balk at the question. Instead, she seemed rather unaffected.

“What makes you think that?” She asked, eyes still trained on the horizon.

“Let’s just say it takes an outsider to know an outsider.” He grinned. Though she didn’t really answer his question, he was sure he was right.

“An outsider, huh?” She seemed intrigued by this notion, slowly taking a sip of her drink in thought. “I guess I never really thought of myself as an outsider.”

“Hey, don’t think of it as a bad thing.” Claude stretched his arms above his head, leaning back to rest against them. “I think being an outsider is the best thing you can be in a place like this.”

“I suppose you’re right about that.” Eve mused. “Fodlan is all too much of the same.”

“You’ve got that right.” Claude chuckled, closing his eyes.

A silence fell over the two as their conversation stalled. And though his eyes were closed Claude could hear Eve gently comforting her wyvern, further solidifying in his mind that she knew exactly what she was doing when it came to flying. After what felt like some time, Eve spoke up again.

“What’s your real name, Claude?” She asked suddenly.

Claude’s eyes snapped open and he sat bolt upright to see her looking directly at him with a piercing gaze.

“What makes you think my name isn’t my name?” He asked, taken aback by her abrupt question.

“Hm, let’s just say it takes an outsider to know an outsider.” She hummed with an amused laugh, throwing his own words back at him. Though she added, “you don’t respond to Claude all the time. It’s like you forget it’s your name.”

Claude weighed his options with her as she looked directly at him. On the one hand, he was very careful not to let anyone know anything about him. He kept everything behind a smokescreen of charm and wit. But it was clear to him that Eve was just as shrouded in mystery as he was. And she didn’t seem to have any malicious intent in asking his name. If anything, this tiny detail would be exactly what he needed to get him into her good graces. Give a little, get a lot.

“Khalid.” He said finally. “My real name is Khalid.”

“That’s an Almyran name.” She pursed her lips. “I can see now why as the heir to an Alliance noble house you’d want to hide your name.”

It was Claude’s turn to purse his lips. Eve had supposedly lived her life sheltered by Lady Rhea and the Church of Seiros, so why was she familiar with Almyran nomenclature? There was much more to the future queen that he had yet to unravel. But his strategy seemed to work in gaining her trust. She would prove to be a vital ally, of this he was sure.

“Well then, Your Majesty,” Claude stood, bowing to offer Eve his hand with a cheeky grin, “shall we descend?”


	24. Twenty-Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay and the short update this time. I'm hitting a bit of a creative dry spell, but I'll try to keep bringing updates!

In the week since Eve had come to Felix’s room, things had both changed and yet stayed the same. For one, Eve stopped slipping away to Sylvain’s room in the nights though she did still spend a lot of time with him. Felix tried to remind himself that they were friends now and it was normal she would spend time with him, but every brush of the shoulder and every flirtatious wink reminded him of the noises Sylvain had been able to elicit from Eve. It reminded him of the carnal way Sylvain knew Eve that she refused to let him know.

And that was something that hadn’t changed. Eve didn’t treat Felix any differently now that she had come as close to confessing as she ever would. In fact, Felix would go as far as to say that Eve was avoiding spending time alone with him behind closed doors. The one time they had tea together, she had insisted they do so in the courtyard. And she turned down his invitations for early morning or late-night training when there was likely to be no one around.

Something that had unexpectedly changed, though, was her relationship with the boar. Felix noticed how Eve seemed to be making some kind of effort to hold true on her promise to be a good wife. She wasn’t doting like she had been when everyone thought they were marrying for love. But she wasn’t distant or cold like she had become when the truth of her marriage to the boar prince was revealed. It was somewhere in between the two now, and Felix couldn’t understand why.

Felix was reminded of this when he spotted Eve sitting in the greenhouse in the early evening before supper. She was knelt before the plants from Duscur that Dedue tended to in the back corner of the greenhouse. And, much like she did when she thought she was alone, she was singing to the blooms softly. As Felix approached on silent feet, he realised he couldn’t understand what Eve was singing. At first, he thought he had misheard, but it became increasingly evident that she was not singing in the language of Fodlan.

“Eve?” He called out to her softly.

“Felix!” She whipped around, clearly caught off guard by the sudden company.

“You, uh,” he scratched the back of his neck and avoided her eyes, embarrassed, “you sing well.”

“I didn’t hear you come in.” She replied, effectively ignoring his compliment.

Felix came and crouched next to Eve, looking at the flowers she was tending to. He reached out to stroke the petals of one, feeling its fragile silkiness between his fingers.

“They’re beautiful, aren’t they?” She asked, smiling with a certain melancholy Felix didn’t understand. “Dedue takes such good care of them. This isn’t the right climate for these flowers and yet he gets them to bloom so gorgeously.”

“I don’t know why he wastes his time on flowers.” Felix muttered, instantly regretting it when he saw the small frown that formed on Eve’s lips.

“It’s not a waste for him to honour his homeland.” Eve said softly before turning to look at Felix with an intense stare. “Not everything has to be a battle to be important, Felix.”

“Yeah.” Felix swallowed his words, not wanting to get irritated. This was the first time he’d been alone with Eve since that kiss and he didn’t want to ruin it in his typical way by getting mad at her.

At that, Eve stood and stretched with a groan. Her knees popped; she had been there a while. Usually before supper she was training or studying. Felix wondered why instead she had gone to the greenhouse.

“Why are you avoiding me?” Felix asked as Eve began to walk away from where he was still crouched.

“I’m not.” She frowned.

“Eve.” He stood to look her in the eyes.

“I’m not avoiding you; I’m avoiding being alone with you.” She sighed, avoiding his direct gaze.

“That’s the same thing!” Felix cried out in exasperation.

“You don’t understand, Felix.” Eve shook her head, still refusing to meet his eyes.

“I know!” He barked, frustrated. “I know I don’t understand, but it’s not like you make any effort to help me understand.”

So much for not getting irritated. He couldn’t help it, though. Eve was always the puppet master of those around her. She held all of the cards when it came to her relationships with others. How much they knew, what they understood, was all dependent on how much she allowed them to know. Felix was tired of being spoon-fed information at her leisure. Eve would use the fact that he didn’t know things to hold him at an arm’s length, but never allowed him to know those things.

“Rhea’s watching.” Eve said solemnly. “I have to be on my best behaviour, and that includes not doing anything that could be misconstrued and twisted to be used against me.”

“What are you talking about?” Felix folded his arms. “What does it matter that Rhea’s watching? You’re already engaged to the boar and it’s widely known. It’s not like she can just get rid of you or make you call off the wedding.”

“She moved it forward, Felix.” Eve finally looked up at him, a plethora of emotions in her eyes.

“What?” Felix frowned.

“Instead of getting married once we graduate,” Eve explained, “she’s making us get married at the monastery. At the end of the Ethereal Moon.”

“Ethereal-?” Felix couldn’t even finish his thought. “That’s in four months.”

“I know.” Eve’s voice was shaky, it was the first time Felix had ever seen her truly be uncertain. “Rhea is using Dimitri to punish me for my defiance. She said if I agreed to moving the wedding and stayed on my best behaviour, she would leave him out of it.”

“You really care about the boar, don’t you?” Felix couldn’t help the jealousy and malice that crept into his voice, however stupid he felt for it. He wasn’t some lovestruck schoolboy, so why did he keep acting like one?

“Of course I do.” Eve’s answer surprised Felix. He hadn’t expected her to answer so immediately and with such conviction. “I care that he’s a human person who doesn’t deserve to serve as a pawn in a game he doesn’t even know is being played.”

“Did you know?” Felix asked.

“What?” Eve’s brow furrowed, confused.

“When you came to my room that night did you know?” Felix asked again. If she knew that she had to start being on her best behaviour, why did she come to his room? Why did she seek him out if she knew she was only going to push him away immediately after? It was always this with Eve; always back and forth, push and pull.

“No.” Eve shook her head much to Felix’s relief. “I never would have gone to you if I knew she was going to do that. It was the morning after that she summoned Dimitri and I to tell us.”

Eve stepped forward, reaching out to tuck a wayward hair of Felix’s back into place. There was warmth in her eyes, but behind that warmth was remorse. Without words, Felix knew she regretted going to him that night. He felt anger bubbling up in his chest at the thought of her regretting what had happened.

This was the boar’s fault.

Dimitri had charmed Eve with his chivalry and his manners just like he had everyone else at the Academy fooled. That was the only reason she’d so adamantly defend him. If she knew the boar for the beast he truly was, she wouldn’t have cared if he ended up being a pawn in the Archbishop’s game. Felix was sure of it. There was no other explanation for why she would care so much.

“Felix,” Eve’s voice was barely a whisper, “I’m truly sorry.”

“For what?” He asked.

“Last week when I went to your room, I had made up my mind to be honest with myself about how I feel for you.” Eve explained. “But I shouldn’t have been so brash. I was just so caught off guard by how much I cared for you in so little time. I gave you hope that I would reciprocate your feelings for me only to turn around and shut you out because of Rhea’s orders.”

“Forget Rhea’s orders.” Felix replied simply. “Forget whatever obligation you think you have to the boar.”

“It’s not that simple.” Eve sighed.

“Why isn’t it?” Felix shrugged.

“You’re just like him.” Eve sighed again, turning her head to look away and wrapping her arms around herself

“No.” Felix said angrily. “No, you don’t get to do that again. You are not bringing up Glenn, you’re going to actually talk to me for once.”

“Glenn never understood why I stuck around either.” Eve looked back at Felix. “Even knowing everything, he didn’t understand.”

“Answer my question.” Felix gritted his teeth.

“If I press Rhea any further, there’s no telling what she’ll do.” Eve turned her head away again, avoiding his gaze. “Dimitri doesn’t deserve to be caught in the middle of that.”

“Why do you care so much about the boar?” Felix narrowed his eyes at her, trying to discern anything he could from her body language.

“Because I failed him just as much as I failed you, Felix.” Eve’s eyes filled with pain. “I never told you, but I was supposed to be in Duscur. Your father asked me to accompany Glenn. And at the last moment, I decided not to go. I could’ve saved Lambert. And every time Dimitri looks at me since the moment he knew about my crest, I can see he knows. He knows if I had been where I was supposed to be, he might still have his father.”

“Who’s just like Glenn now?” Felix grumbled.

“What?” Eve’s brow furrowed.

“Always talking about duty and doing what’s right.” Felix snapped. It was always this with her, but he couldn’t help it. She was the only person who could make him feel things and for some reason these feelings always manifested as anger.

“Felix,” Eve reached out and cupped his cheek in her hand, “there are two times in my life where I have turned my back on duty. And both of those time, people who were very dear to me ended up dead. That is why I stick to my duty to Dimitri.”

“Whatever.” Felix clicked his tongue, yanking himself away from Eve’s touch. He had had enough of this. He didn’t want to squander this time he had alone with Eve, but he had done it anyways. And now all he wanted to do was leave.

So he did just that, pivoting on his heel to walk around Eve and storm out of the greenhouse. He didn’t wait to see if she followed, consciously making an effort not to hear if she called out after him.

* * *

Jeralt saw the Fraldarius boy storm out of the greenhouse like wrath itself as he came down the stairs from the dining hall. From what Byleth had told him, Felix had a notoriously short fuse. Still, he wondered what on Earth was in that greenhouse that could make him so angry. Jeralt only wondered this for a moment, though, until he saw Eve step out of the building with a worn look on her face.

She looked up, making eye contact with Jeralt. She seemed stunned to see him there, if not a little frightened. Seeing her reaction, Jeralt sighed and jerked his head towards the dock on the fishing pond. Eve nodded and strode over to join him there, taking a seat on the wooden planks.

“You’re lucky I’m not Seteth.” Jeralt said casually, glancing at Eve from the corner of his eye.

“I know.” Eve sighed, her head in her hands. “And I’m going to pre-emptively say thank you for not telling Rhea about what you just saw.”

“I’m guessing you told the Fraldarius boy about the new wedding date?” Jeralt raised an eyebrow at her questioningly. When he saw Eve’s visible confusion, he added, “I might be old, but I’m not dead. I see how that boy pines after you.”

“That obvious, huh?” Eve scoffed, tossing a splinter she had pried from the dock into the pond. “I wish I never came back to this place.”

“But you did.” Jeralt shrugged. “And so did I. There’s no changing that.”

“You’d think after all the lives I’ve lived I’d have learned how not to be a fool.” Eve shook her head with a bitter laugh. “I have lived all this time and I don’t think I’ve ever grown up.”

“You’re different from the time I first met you, though.” Jeralt mused.

“How so?” Eve frowned, looking up at him as he stood above her with his arms crossed.

“How you were back then reminds me a lot of how my own kid is now.” He huffed. “You were stoic, cold, shut off. I don’t think I would have called you anything short of calculating. You were so good at reading other people, but no one could ever read you. You just didn’t have emotions.”

“Can you read me now, Captain?” Eve smirked at him with a challenging glint in her eye.

“You care about that boy. And you care about the prince too.” He assessed. “I think for the first time in a long time you’re allowing yourself to feel things. But you’re not used to emotions, so it’s making you confused and you’re acting brashly because of it.”

Eve whistled, looking out over the pond once more, “that one cut deep.”

“I don’t think it’s a bad thing.” Jeralt answered. “From the outside looking in, it looks to me like you’ve figured out how to live again.”

“Is that so?” Eve hummed in thought.

Jeralt watched as her eyes danced over the water’s surface as if some kind of answer would lie there. He thought about how she had looked the first time their paths had crossed. Back then, her eyes were lifeless and cold. He had watched her cut down enemies without even a hint of emotion much like his own child did. But now there was life in her eyes. There was conflict and confusion, but there was life. Seeing her like this, it was so easy to forget that she was no mere child. It truly gave him the impression that she never got to be young. And now, regardless of her true age, she was getting to be an adolescent.


	25. Twenty-Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have an extra long chapter for this update :) enjoy!

“Is now really the time to be having tea, professor?”

Eve sat across from Byleth, looking intently into her teacup. She seemed troubled by the drink, brow furrowed as she examined it closely. Eve was often preoccupied in the last week, Byleth had noticed. She had intended to invite the prince’s fiancée to tea much earlier, but for some reason Eve was especially hard to pin down. If she wasn’t in class or in training, it was practically impossible to find her. And even Dimitri, Felix, and Sylvain, who Byleth saw Eve with most often, didn’t know where she was. Either that or they refused to share which Byleth somehow doubted.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Byleth asked, taking a sip of her own tea as she thought on Eve’s recent behaviour.

“Our mission.” Eve answered simply.

“Is our mission today?” Byleth asked rhetorically.

“I just think that if you wanted to have tea with someone, Sylvain would’ve been a better candidate.” Eve’s eyes were still locked on her teacup. “He needs support right now whether he wants to admit it or not.”

“If you didn’t want to have tea with me, you could have refused.” Byleth watched Eve carefully as she spoke.

“Does anyone refuse your invitations?” Eve half laughed, finally looking up from her tea to meet the professor’s eyes.

“Felix.” Byleth answered which earned her another half-hearted laugh.

“Well, that’s no surprise.” Eve smirked.

Byleth noted that Eve didn’t seem to have any reaction to the mention of Felix, especially not the kind that Dimitri had had. She wondered if Eve simply wasn’t aware of Dimitri’s concern about Felix’s feelings for her. But she quickly dismissed this thought—Eve was intelligent, there was no way she wouldn’t notice either Felix’s affections or Dimitri’s distress.

“Something wrong with the tea?” Byleth asked when Eve’s gaze returned to her cup. “I can make a fresh pot if you like.”

“No, it’s nothing wrong.” Eve blinked a couple times before pushing the cup forward for the professor to see. “Just a bit of superstition.”

Byleth leaned forward to see Eve’s tea. The golden liquid shimmered in the sunlight, but what stood out was the single tea stem that had floated to the top, standing straight. The professor frowned, trying to think of any superstition she might’ve heard involving tea leaves. She had seen fortune tellers who claimed to be able to see your future in the leaves at the bottom of a finished cup, but nothing about a single stem.

“A standing stem is supposed to be good luck.” Eve said when she noticed the professor’s confusion. “And if it’s just one it could mean the arrival of a stranger or… lover.”

“I didn’t take you for the superstitious type.” Byleth mused. Eve had always seemed very much cut and dry. Byleth couldn’t even remember a single time she’d seen her in the cathedral praying.

“I’m not, particularly.” Eve frowned, seemingly to herself more than to the professor. “I guess I just have a soft spot for old beliefs. But you didn’t call me here to discuss tea leaves, did you?”

“No.” Byleth shook her head. “I’ve been meaning to speak to you about something.”

“I’m an open book.” Eve leaned back in her seat as she spoke. Byleth highly doubted that.

“It has come to my attention that Dimitri is… worried about Felix’s relationship with you.” Byleth spoke carefully, choosing her words to phrase it in a way that wouldn’t put blame on Eve. She didn’t want her getting defensive.

“I assure you, professor, my fiancée has nothing to worry about.” Eve answered rather diplomatically with a smile that didn’t reach her eyes.

“Listen,” Byleth sighed, “I’m not Seteth. I’m not going to report back to Lady Rhea about what you say. You can speak freely with me, Eve.”

“Like I said, Dimitri has nothing to worry about.” Eve shook her head lightly. “My relationships with anyone else will not get in the way of our marriage.”

“He loves you.” Byleth stated, matter of fact.

“Excuse me.” Eve coughed, no doubt startled that such words would come from Byleth of all people.

“I don’t believe Dimitri is concerned because of how it affects your wedding.” Byleth elaborated.

“I didn’t expect you to be the type of professor to involve yourself in your students’ extracurricular affairs.” Eve quirked an eyebrow up, taking a sip of her tea.

“Typically, I don’t.” Byleth frowned. “But we have a very important mission coming up and I don’t want these kinds of things affecting how the three of you perform on the battlefield.”

“I don’t get distracted on the battlefield, professor.” Eve pursed her lips.

“The first time you fought with the Blue Lions you nearly died protecting Felix.” Byleth retorted.

“Believe me, professor, it’d take a lot more than that to kill me.” A cryptic smile formed on Eve’s lips.

“And the second time you fought with us you disobeyed a direct order from the Archbishop to save him.” Byleth continued.

“Would you have preferred I allow one of your students to die, knowing I had the power to save them?” Eve challenged with a furrowed brow.

Byleth sighed. She couldn’t possibly tell Eve about Sothis and the power of Divine Pulse allowed to her. Even knowing about Eve’s seemingly miraculous crest, Byleth wasn’t sure anyone would believe her about her own power. Not to mention Sothis was vehemently opposed to anyone knowing about her. 

“Of course not, Eve.” Byleth shook her head. “All I want to say is that you seem to go onto the battlefield with your own agenda. In this upcoming mission I need to know that you’re going to function as a part of the class rather than an individual because I get the feeling whatever you do will affect what Felix and Dimitri do as well.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, professor.” Eve agreed rather quickly much to Byleth’s surprise. She seemed to be troubled by the prospect of both Felix and Dimitri following her whims.

Byleth was absolutely puzzled by Eve and the circumstances surrounding her. Her appearance had been abrupt and unexpected. And just as everyone had started to familiarise themselves with her, it was revealed that her story and her reasons for marrying Dimitri were all a lie. Even now, Byleth got the feeling that Eve was still hiding some modicum of the truth from the other Blue Lions.

It was also astonishing to Byleth that Dimitri would have actually fallen in love with Eve. Though, she supposed Dimitri was the type to take his duty so seriously he would convince himself he was in love with Eve for her sake. She could imagine him saying something along the lines of Eve deserving to marry someone she loved, so he decided to love her.

But the prince seemed truly disturbed by the idea of Felix being in love with Eve. This also came as a shock to Byleth that Felix could feel anything other than contempt towards another person. She had only been Felix and Dimitri’s professor for a short time before Eve arrived, but Byleth had a firm enough grasp on their personalities by that point to know it was uncharacteristic the way they acted around her. And all in such a miniscule amount of time. Byleth had never been in love before, but she reckoned it was the type of thing that usually happened over time and not in a sudden burst of chaos like she was watching unfold between her three students.

“Can I request something rather selfish, professor?” Eve asked suddenly, reminding Byleth of when Dimitri had asked something similar.

“I’ll be the judge of that.” Byleth answered the same way she had Dimitri.

“Dimitri needs someone who cares deeply about him—romantically or otherwise.” Eve’s voice suddenly dropped low, a rare sincere quality taking over it. “I fear I can’t be that person. If I am unable to step up when Dimitri needs me most, I want to ask that you be there to support him.”

“You care about him.” Byleth said rather plainly.

“Not enough.” She shook her head. “Not in the way he needs me to.”

“If it puts your mind at ease, then I agree to be there for Dimitri.” Byleth wasn’t sure of her words herself. She felt as if she was making a promise she wouldn’t possibly be able to keep. “Though, I doubt this agreement will even be necessary.”

“Regardless,” Eve sighed as if a weight had been lifted off her chest, “it truly does make me feel more at ease. Thank you.”

* * *

“It should be in our sights soon, Professor. The abandoned tower those thieves are using as a base... Conand Tower.” It was Dimitri who paused first, Byleth and Gilbert both stopping at his side. The other Blue Lions who were trailing behind also stopped to gather themselves.

“This area was the site of a massive battle several hundred years ago.” Gilbert said with a glance at their surroundings. “That's when invasions from the north were at their peak. Back then, this tower was built for both surveillance and defence. It will be difficult to seize it.”

“You're very well informed, Gilbert. Please, tell us more.” It was rare for Dimitri to be sarcastic, but recent events had his patience running thin.

“Well, I...” Gilbert began before a pointed look from Byleth made him trail off. “Ah. You're joking.”

“Professor. Did you see the local villages?” Dimitri turned now to Byleth. “They were in rough shape, no doubt because of the thief attacks. They're not going to make it through the winter in that condition. If the thieves had taken up pillaging in order to survive, that would be deplorable...but understandable. But this... This is something else entirely. It looks as though they destroyed those villages purely for pleasure. No matter what their reasons may be, that sort of behaviour cannot be allowed. Ever.”

Again, it didn’t go unnoticed by the others the uncharacteristic tone that took over Dimitri’s voice. Many of the Blue Lions knew His Highness to have a very clear devotion to justice, but they also knew him to be extremely level-headed. But they could tell he was angry, and not just at the bandits.

“Don't bother losing your head over those lowlifes, Your Highness. It's wasted effort.” Sylvain walked over to join His Highness, Gilbert, and Byleth in an attempt to dissipate the air of tension.

“Sylvain... The thieves' leader...the one who stole the Relic. Word has it he's your older brother. I know he's been disowned, but...” Dimitri trailed off, seemingly having no real direction to his thought.

“He is no longer a member of House Gautier...or my brother.” Sylvain said with an unusually serious tone. “He's nothing more than a common thief.”

“Are you sure about that?” Dimitri frowned. “It would be understandable to find this situation...well, regrettable, to say the least.”

“Regrets? Heh, you must be joking.” Sylvain laughed, but it was hollow. “You know we're far past the point of regret. And it always falls on the younger brother to clean up the mistakes of their elders, doesn't it?”

Sylvain turned away to join the rest of the class and allow for Byleth, Gilbert, and Dimitri to finalise their plan of attack. Everyone else was busy preparing, checking their weapons and supplies. There was a sombre silence over the class, a realisation that this mission would be harder than any of the others they had faced.

“Sylvain.” Eve called out to the redhead.

“Hey, kitten.” He smirked, pushing off from the tree he was leaning against to stand before her.

“Sylvain.” She said his name again, sighing. Gingerly, she reached out and grabbed his hands in hers, rubbing her thumbs in circles over the backs of them.

“Hey, now.” Sylvain grinned. “You know you’re so much prettier when you smile.”

“You’re allowed to be upset, you know.” Eve said, looking up at him.

“Now how could I be upset when I’ve got you in my life, hm?” He winked, though Eve could tell he was struggling to keep up his usual charm.

“Stop.” She said. “Your brother’s made your life a living hell and you always handled it because it was just you on the receiving end of his wrath. But I saw your face when we walked through all those villages. I know it’s taking a toll on you because now he’s hurting others. And you think it’s your fault just because you were born with a crest?”

“Sometimes I wonder if I would’ve turned out like him if I was born without a crest.” Sylvain said quietly.

“I don’t know if it’s the answer you want,” Eve looked down at their hands, “but you probably wouldn’t exist if Miklan was born with a crest.”

“You’re probably right.” Sylvain laughed humourlessly.

“But thinking about hypotheticals isn’t going to make you feel better.” Eve said softly. “What you need to focus on is the fact that none of us blame you for this. And we will all stand by you in this fight.”

“You know, you’re right.” Sylvain withdrew one of his hands to rake it through his hair, looking off in the distance at nothing in particular.

“Hm?” Eve cocked her head questioningly.

“I never retaliated against Miklan when we were young because I understood why he did it.” Sylvain sighed. “And it was only me who had to put up with it.”

“I remember.” Eve offered a tight smile. “It broke my heart, you know. Felix was always so torn up when you were hurt.”

“Sometimes I wonder where that sweet little kid went.” Sylvain chuckled, looking over Eve’s shoulder at his friend who was busy polishing his weapon.

“I remember one time Miklan ended up breaking your arm.” Eve spoke softly, eyes misted over by the memory. “You were pretty beat up that time. And you told Felix and Ingrid it was just an accident, that you tripped and fell into the well when you weren’t paying attention.”

“Goddess, that was ages ago.” Sylvain blinked, remembering the incident Eve was talking about. “I remember Felix was absolutely inconsolable.”

“He looked up to you almost as much as he looked up to Glenn back then.” Eve smiled with a certain melancholy. “He was so broken up about it he wouldn’t let go of you. It was even to the point where he hurt your arm even more just because he was clinging so tightly to you.

Sylvain started to chuckle at the memory before something odd struck him. Eve spoke of the memory as if it were her own, but Sylvain distinctly remembered the incident happening in Gautier territory at his family’s home. Rodrigue had had some meeting about something or another with his own father and brought Felix and Glenn with him. Though, he couldn’t exactly remember why Ingrid had been there as well.

As he thought more on it, he remembered that Rodrigue had only arrived with one servant—a young woman who followed him like a shadow.

_“Now, now, Felix, I think that’s quite enough.”_

Sylvain could hear her voice in his memory. He remembered its calming quality as she soothed a crying Felix.

_“You don’t see Glenn crying, do you?”_

She had pried Felix’s hands from around Sylvain’s injured arm, hoisting him up in her arms to rest him on the crook of her hip. Sylvain remembered thinking she was beautiful, her lithe form and her long black hair that almost made her look like she could be Felix’s mother.

And suddenly it hit him. Her hair had been so much longer back then, but there was no mistaking it. That Fraldarius servant and the girl who stood before him now had the same face, the same low rasp to her voice that was somehow infinitely calming.

“Eve.” Sylvain felt as if hours had passed since either of them had spoken, though truly it had been mere moments.

“Yes?” Eve looked up at Sylvain, searching his eyes.

“How old are you?” He asked without hesitation, filled with a sudden need for the answer.

“My body is twenty-two.” She answered. “But that’s not what you’re asking, is it?”

“Was it you?” Sylvain asked. “The servant I remember from my childhood every time Rodrigue came to see my father—that was you, wasn’t it?”

“It was.” Eve nodded, her voice breathy as if relieved to share the burden of this truth.

“Does…” Sylvain glanced over her shoulder.

“No.” Eve answered before he could finish his question. “I haven’t told Dimitri and Felix doesn’t remember.”

“What are you going to do?” He asked, eyes still trained over her shoulder.

“I don’t know.” She shook her head. “Sooner or later they will notice, but I guess I’ll have to cross that bridge when I get to it.”

* * *

Conand Tower was not kind to the Blue Lions. By the time they had reached the upper levels, their energy had been nearly spent. Vulneraries were few and far between and they knew the battle was only going to get more harrowing as they continued.

“The enemy is close by.” Gilbert called out from where he brought up the rear of the group. “We’re almost to the top floor.”

“They are merely thieves, but they have a Hero’s Relic. Do not drop your guard.” Dimitri warned his classmates as they made their way through the passage.

“Don’t hold back for my sake.” Sylvain said as he ran his lance through an enemy thief. “My brother is going to pay for everything he’s done.”

And so, as if with a newfound energy, the Blue Lions kept plodding on. Byleth led them well, thankful that she had agreed to Linhardt’s request to join her class as well as made the effort to recruit Ferdinand. Had she not had their assistance along with the Ashen Wolves she had recruited last month, she wasn’t sure her students would have been able to make it this far.

Dimitri led the charge with Dedue and Sylvain by his side. Close behind him was Eve and he was thankful that the professor had asked Felix to help guard the rear with Gilbert. It gave him one less thing to cloud his mind as he cut his way through the thieves that had needlessly pillaged the surrounding villages.

That wasn’t to say that it wasn’t a tough fight, though. Dimitri felt the fatigue in his muscles; he was acutely aware of how heavy his lance felt in his grip. And as he moved to block an oncoming attack, he knew well before the blow landed that he had been too slow. But as he braced for the blade to glance off his bicep, he felt no pain. Instead, he watched as a wound blossomed on his assailant’s arm in the exact spot he should have been hit. The thief in front of him dropped his blade in shock, giving Dimitri time to dispose of him despite his disbelief.

He whipped around, locking eyes with Eve from where she stood on the battlefield. He noticed how worn she was, much more than anyone else. She was breathing heavily, staggering to lean on Yuri for a moment as he disposed of the enemies around them. She didn’t even have her weapons drawn, choosing instead to attack with the limited spells she knew.

And then it hit him. As his eyes flitted over the raging battle, Dimitri saw that not one of his classmates was injured. They were exhausted and battle worn, but untouched. Where there was torn clothing and obvious evidence of contact with a weapon, there was no blood shed.

She was protecting them—all of them.

So, this was the full potential of her crest’s power. Dimitri recalled a time when Eve had said that though many would believe the fullest extent of her power was her ability to resurrect the dead, there was so much more she could do. And now he recognised what she had meant. They had cut through so many enemies at this point and yet not a single Blue Lion was injured. He could only imagine the potential this power had if she was fully protected and allowed to devote all of her strength to using her crest. Of course, none of them could have suffered fatal injuries for her to be able to do this, but being uninjured meant that all of the Blue Lions could continue to fight for as long as they had.

Dimitri then realised why the Archbishop was so intent on keeping Eve on the side of the church. He thought back to Lonato’s rebellion and the waves of enemies that had come through the fog. He couldn’t imagine being unable to wound those enemies. If someone with Eve’s power had been on the opposing side, the Blue Lions would have only had the choice of landing fatal blows to be able to push forward. With Eve’s crest, there was no incapacitating enemies or winning on stamina alone.

And at the same time, Dimitri found his heart aching in his chest as he watched Eve struggle to continue protecting their classmates. She was a formidable foe on the battlefield with her blades alone. And yet she was more concerned with making sure everyone was safe. As much as Eve wanted to seem aloof and like she only cared for her own agenda, she was a protector by nature. She protected the Fraldarius family, she protected him from Lady Rhea, she protected the Blue Lions from bodily harm. And she did all of this at the cost of her own wellbeing.

“Eve!” Dimitri called out when he saw her stagger once more, abandoning Dedue and Sylvain to rush to her side.

“I’ve got her covered, don’t worry.” Yuri said, slashing through an enemy as they pushed forward.

“You’re wearing yourself out, Eve.” Dimitri ignored Yuri, watching Eve’s face intently.

“We’re nearly to the top.” Eve’s breath was laboured as she jerked her head towards the stairs before them. It was true; just up the stairs and across the landing was the highest point of Conand Tower where, no doubt, Miklan would be waiting for them.

“Drink this.” Dimitri shoved his last vulnerary into her hand.

“No, you need it more than me.” She shook her head and tried to give the bottle back to Dimitri.

“I know what you’re doing, Eve.” Dimitri pushed the potion back into her hand. “If resurrecting someone once takes your full force, you’re going to kill yourself from the effort of protecting all of us from injury for this long.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She gritted her teeth. But the glow of her crest betrayed her, and Dimitri watched an arrow graze Mercede’s calf without leaving so much as a scratch in its wake.

“Miklan!” Sylvain’s shout brought both Dimitri and Eve’s attention back to the matter at hand.

They had finally made it to the top of Conand Tower. And standing before them was Miklan, wielding the Lance of Ruin.

Eve rushed forward to stand at Sylvain’s side, her exhaustion forgotten. And when Dimitri joined her there, he found himself becoming part of a tense standoff between the two forces.

“Why have you come, you Crest-bearing fool?” Miklan grimaced at his brother. Dimitri watched as Eve’s hand flew out to rest on Sylvain’s arm—whether in comfort or to hold him back, though, he wasn’t sure.

“I'm here for the Lance of Ruin, Miklan.” Sylvain held his ground, a rare frown tracing lines into his forehead. “Hand it over. I don't want to humiliate you, but I will.”

“Hurry up and die already.” Miklan barked back. “If not for you... If it hadn't been for you...”

“Shut up! I'm so tired of hearing that.” Eve’s hand on Sylvain’s arm squeezed as he faced off against his brother. “You've always blamed me for something that isn't my fault.”

Though it was painful to watch, Dimitri was grateful for the brief standoff between the two Gautier brothers. It gave the rest of the Blue Lions time to gather at the entrance to the large room. And it provided a long enough pause for vulneraries to be uncorked and healing spells to be cast. They were all a little worse for wear, but Dimitri was confident they had enough left in them to end this here and now.

Or so he thought, so they all thought, until something no one was expecting occurred. As they fought, a darkness erupted from the stone within the Lance of Ruin. They all watched on in horror, friend and foe alike, as the tendrils enveloped Miklan until he disappeared within them.

“What the hell.” There was true fear in Eve’s eyes when Dimitri turned to her.

Where Miklan once stood, there was now a Black Beast—a demonic thing that towered above them all.

“What the- Miklan?!” Sylvain’s eyes widened in horror. “Is that you?!”

“So, this is the power of a Hero's Relic. To create such a sinister beast...” Dimitri trailed off, looking at the monster before them.” It has gone too far. I fear all we can do now is put an end to it.”

“Get back!” Byleth called out to her students as the beast swiped at them.

Without hesitation, she drew the Sword of the Creator against what had once been Miklan. Dimitri watched as she unleashed the power of the Relic she wielded, burying the glowing blade deep within the Black Beast.

And just as quickly as it had begun, the chaos was over. The beast fell with a mighty roar and the darkness that had consumed Miklan dissipated—leaving only the man and the Relic behind.

“Goddess…” Gilbert turned his head heavenward, allowing the rain to fall upon his face. “The beast is gone, yet Miklan and the lance remain.”

“It’s over…” Dimitri said, though for whom he wasn’t sure. “Let’s retrieve the lance and leave this place.”

“Miklan…” Sylvain staggered, leaning against his lance for support. “My brother…”

Dimitri moved to join his friend, intending to offer whatever comfort he could as Gilbert and the professor retrieved the Lance of Ruin. But as he stepped forward, he was pulled back by his cape. He turned around to see Eve with a fistful of the blue fabric, clinging to it with desperation.

“Eve?” His voice dripped with concern as he noticed just how pale her complexion was.

“…safe?” Her words were muddled from exhaustion.

“What?” Dimitri’s brow furrowed.

“Is everyone safe?” She tried again, this time a little more audible.

“Yes.” Dimitri nodded, looking around at the tired yet unharmed Blue Lions.

“Good.” She smiled weakly. And before Dimitri had time to berate her for her recklessness, she collapsed into his arms—a peacefulness he had never seen before settling into her features.


	26. Twenty-Five

Eve could feel her body rocking as if she were cradled in a boat upon the sea. With her eyes closed, she could even feel droplets of water peppering her face. She was at peace; her body was cold, but warm arms that felt like home were enveloped around her.

Slowly gaining consciousness, Eve forced her heavy eyelids open. She pieced together her surroundings bit by bit as she became more and more aware. She was riding side-saddle on a horse, a strong arm wrapped around her back and gripping her shoulder to support her. Her other shoulder was pressed into a warm chest and she could see in front of her was another arm carefully navigating the reigns of their steed.

Eve’s eyes trailed up from the arm before her to see its owner’s face. Thin lips were pressed into a tight line over a set jaw; hard eyes were trained forward on the path yet unseeing. His hair was plastered to his forehead with rainwater and sweat that trailed down his face and dripped off his chin onto Eve’s cheek.

From this angle, he looked so beautiful.

“Eve, you’re awake.” He started when he glanced down and met her intense gaze.

“…mitri…” She muttered, suddenly noticing how dry her throat was.

“Here, have some water.” He briefly released his hold on the reigns of his horse to reach for his water that was secured to the saddle.

Gratefully, she took the water in both her hands, undoing the top and bringing it to her lips. The cold liquid was welcome on her parched tongue and she closed her eyes in satisfaction.

“Where are we, Dimitri?” She asked once she had the strength to do so.

“We’re on our way back to Garreg Mach, you’ve only been out a few hours.” He explained, eyes trained on the path before them.

Eve’s brow furrowed as she further studied Dimitri’s face. He was so skilled in remaining calm and collected. He wasn’t like the professor who had a blank face with no emotions, but rather he had somehow perfected the art of the ‘positively neutral’ expression. One could never tell the turmoil that was happening behind his kind eyes.

Softly, Eve reached out to cup Dimitri’s cheek in her hand. His skin was soft beneath her fingers and she couldn’t help but rub her thumb across his features. Had they ever shared a moment like this before? Eve always felt like she was being something for Dimitri, but now with no stamina left in her body she felt stripped away. Even so, she felt safe in his arms.

“What is it?” He asked in response to her touch.

“You’re angry with me.” She said slowly, retracting her hand.

“You were reckless in Conand Tower.” He replied much to Eve’s surprise. She had never heard his voice sound so harsh. “Did you not think of how dangerous it would be to use your Crest to its full extent like that?”

“I—” Eve started before Dimitri cut her off.

“You are not indestructible, Eve.” He continued. “Using up all of your stamina like that, what if you were attacked? You would not have had the energy to fight back.”

“I just wanted to protect them.” Eve mumbled.

She wasn’t even really sure herself why she had done it. But it was something along the lines of seeing these children fight against some of the hardest enemies they had ever encountered. This was not some small mission to send teenagers on. Eve could remember feeling rage that Rhea would use mere children as a shield to combat her problems. The Knights of Seiros should have dealt with Miklan. Or Margrave Gautier. Or Rodrigue. Or the King Regent. There were so many people that could have handled this without children being involved. And yet Eve found herself watching the people she had learned to call friends fighting against experienced bandits. Instinct had taken over.

“I wish there were something I could say that would make you realise you do not have to do everything on your own.” Dimitri sighed.

“I know I don’t have to do everything on my own.” Eve said softly. “But there are certain things that only I can do.”

“Twice now I have had to carry you like this, worried for your life.” Dimitri’s face took on a complicated look. “Are you so opposed to marrying me that you would rather die?”

“Is that what you think?” Eve asked, reaching out again to hold Dimitri’s face in her hand.

It was dangerous, she knew, to be so tender with him in this moment. There was a lingering voice in the back of her mind telling her she was being cruel. Someone like Dimitri would of course misconstrue her compassion for affection and she would only feed the flames of his love for her. She knew that, yet Eve couldn’t bring herself to draw away from him. He was so vulnerable; how could she not reach out to him?

“When it comes to you, I do not know what to think.” Dimitri looked down at her with a pained expression, leaning ever so slightly into her touch.

“Dimitri, you’re not a bad person.” Eve said, holding his gaze in hopes to convey her sincerity. “Anyone would be very lucky to marry you. In fact, I am very lucky to be marrying you. You’ve saved me from a life of being the Archbishop’s pawn. It hurts me to see you believe you are so undesirable I’d rather die than marry you.”

“Someone like me is not worthy of love or even pity.” Dimitri grimaced, looking back up at the road ahead of them.

“You’re wrong, you know.” Eve let her hand fall back into her lap at his movement. “I don’t know what you think you’ve done, but your soul is not damned or irredeemable. You’re a good man by heart, you have a desire to save people.”

“And yet you do not love me.” Dimitri replied quietly as if he hadn’t meant to say it out loud.

“I’m sorry.” The words came out of Eve’s mouth before she was even really aware of what she was saying.

But it was true, she was sorry. She wished she hadn’t been the first person Dimitri fell in love with. Someone like her would only ruin him and his hopeful outlook on the world. She wasn’t necessarily sorry that she didn’t love him, but more she was sorry that she had been the type of person to him that he thought he could be in love with.

“Rest.” He said firmly. “We’ll be back to Garreg Mach soon.”

Eve nodded silently and allowed herself to close her eyes again. The movements of the horse beneath her that should have been uncomfortable served instead to lull her to sleep. And as she slept, she dreamed of home and of flowers in bloom. She dreamed of the training she endured under the cherry blossoms and the way the petals fell around her. She dreamed of duty and honour and how they weighed upon her shoulders as she grew up.

_You do not have to do everything on your own._

But she did, she always had. The future of her nation had rested upon her shoulders. She was gifted with purpose, with a power given to her by a foreign goddess. She had to be a leader, a daughter, a wife. Only she alone could do those things. That was why it was so hard for her to let go of that notion now. It had been so long since she had been home, but there was no forgetting the foundation she had been brought up upon. She knew she was no longer who she used to be. Eve was now a student, a commoner thrust into nobility. She could rely on others now, but she was finding it nearly impossible.

Eventually, her dreams of a lifetime long lost left her and Eve awoke in her own room. She had been carefully tucked into her bed, the damp academy uniform she had been wearing previously switched out for her bedclothes. An ethereal orange glow filled her room as the setting sun poured in through her open window. As she sat up, Eve noticed the form slumped over at her desk sleeping quietly.

Again, she found herself thinking how beautiful he looked like this. Without the worry, without the façade he so often put forth. There was a gentleness about him that Eve couldn’t help but be drawn to. She wanted to protect this youthful look that filled his features.

“Dimitri.” She brushed his fringe out of his face as she whispered his name. “Dimitri, you’ll be sore for days if you keep sleeping like that.”

Slowly, his eyes opened and he blinked away the sleep that misted them.

“Eve?” He lifted his head from where they had been resting on his folded arms to look up at her.

“What are you doing here, Dimitri?” Eve asked, resting a hand comfortingly on his back.

“I did not mean to sleep.” He said, standing to further wake himself up.

“It’s okay, I don’t mind.” Eve smiled and stepped back.

“I…” Dimitri began but suddenly stopped when he finally looked at Eve in her nightclothes, his face erupting into a violent blush as he averted his eyes. “Apologies. I had Mercedes change you out of your wet clothes. I was worried you would catch a cold.”

“Thank you.” Eve said as she turned to retrieve a cloak from her drawers in order to cover herself for Dimitri’s benefit. “It seems you’re always worrying over me.”

“You seem never to worry about yourself, so someone has got to do it.” Dimitri frowned. His frowned deepened even further when his remark was met with a small laugh from Eve. “I mean it.”

“I know you do.” Eve chuckled lightly, stepping forward. “You chastise me for only worrying about others and yet here you are doing the same thing.”

Dimitri’s arm lifted as if he wanted to reach out and grab Eve’s face, but halfway through the motion he let it fall back to his side. In his eyes it looked to Eve as if he were remembering something, and she was reminded of his promise never to touch her unless she asked it of him. And all at once she was reminded of how cruel she was to indulge in this quiet moment and the one they had shared earlier.

“Why must it be Felix?” He asked with a complicated look on his face.

“I can’t tell you that.” Eve shook her head sorrowfully. “I don’t know why either.”

“You say I am wrong to think I am unworthy of love, but what else am I to think when the one woman I have ever loved will not even look at me?” Dimitri seemed embarrassed by his question and Eve could understand why. He was feeling all of these things for the first time.

“Dimitri.” Eve said his name firmly, demanding he look at her. “I’m here. I see you.”

“Perhaps with your eyes, but your heart seeks out Felix.” Dimitri shook his head. “I don’t understand. It was I who you reached for at Conand Tower. Was it not me who carried you home? Who brought you here and ensured your safety? What more must I do?”

“It’s not that it _must_ be Felix, it just _is_.” Eve tried her best to explain, though it didn’t help that she herself still hadn’t figured out exactly what it was she felt for Felix. “And it’s not that there’s something you _must_ do. The right person should love you as you are.”

“Then I must be damned for I do not believe there is any person who can love me as I am.” Dimitri frowned, bringing his hands up to look at his palms. “Beneath these gloves I am not a man, but a monster.”

“Every man is a monster in the eyes of his own sins.” Eve reached out to place her hands in his, squeezing them lightly.

“Though some more than others.” Dimitri muttered, staring down at their hands.

Eve sighed, also looking down at their hands. Soon enough, these very hands would be tied together by the ribbon of matrimony. She knew she would have to abandon whatever it was she felt for Felix, but the part of her that so staunchly opposed Rhea didn’t want to. However, opposing Rhea in this situation would also mean opposing Dimitri and the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus. She was sure it was the only reason Rhea agreed to Rodrigue’s proposal. Rhea knew that Eve would never do anything to destabilise the Kingdom and put House Fraldarius in peril. A defiant wife who acted against the church would sow the seed of doubt within the people of the Kingdom of Dimitri’s ability to rule.

“Come here, Dimitri.” Eve said softly, leading him by his hands as she came to sit on her bed.

“Eve, what are you…?” Dimitri’s face once again erupted into a blush as she pulled him by his arm to guide him onto the bed.

“Just lay down.” She instructed, patting her lap from where she sat at the head of her bed.

“You want me to…?” Once again, Dimitri was too embarrassed to finish his question.

“You’re always taking care of me; I want to return the favour.” She offered a small smile.

She watched, slightly amused, as he awkwardly clamoured onto her bed, removing his boots first. He laid down stiff as a board with his head nestled in her crossed legs. Eve had to stifle a laugh as Dimitri fought to look everywhere except up at her face, his own a lovely shade of scarlet by now. But once again, a small voice in the back of her head chastised her for torturing the poor boy with a hope of love.

Softly, Eve began to hum the tune of a song from her home. As she hummed, she ran her fingers through Dimitri’s hair. It was silky between her fingers, like spun gold. Soon enough Dimitri’s stiff posture relaxed, and he closed his eyes. And as Eve continued to hum his breath slowed and evened out until he was fully asleep.

Eve smiled down at his sleeping face, once more revelling in how peaceful he could look like this. She was a completely selfish being, tugging around this boy at her every whim. And even more so she was continuing to entertain her little crush on Felix. She knew it was unfair, and yet here she was leaning down to place a gentle kiss on Dimitri’s forehead.

“Sleep well, little prince.”


	27. Twenty-Six

There was a certain energy buzzing about the Officer’s Academy that morning that Eve couldn’t place. She felt as if there were more eyes on her than usual, voices lowering to whispers whenever she came near. At breakfast, she had eaten with Ashe and Annette and they had all chatted as normal. But when Eve passed Ashe on their way to morning lecture not even an hour later, he blushed and avoided her eyes. 

And now at their morning training, Eve felt as if she were about to burst if she didn’t figure out what was going on. She was fine with people avoiding her and they could whisper all they wanted, but now Felix wouldn’t even look at her and he was training with a viciousness that could only mean he was angry about something.

“So, I guess you changed your mind about wanting to break Dimitri’s heart.” Sylvain sidled up to Eve’s side as she stood in front of the rack of training lances.

“What are you talking about?” She asked, more focused on figuring out which length of lance would better suit her. Byleth had asked that today everyone train in a weapon they weren’t familiar with in order to improve on their skillsets.

“I mean I was wondering why you stopped coming by.” Sylvain continued with a cheeky grin, ignoring her question. “Must say I miss our little get-togethers.”

“Sylvain,” Eve turned to him, crossing her arms, “what in the hell are you talking about?”

“Come on.” He chuckled. “You’re not getting coy on me now, are you?”

“If you’re not going to answer my question, can you at least make yourself useful and help me pick the right lance?” Eve turned back to gesture at the rack of weapons.

“Wait, do you seriously not know what I’m talking about?” Sylvain’s grin dropped as he reached out to grab one of the lighter lances that had a longer blade to hand to Eve. “This one’ll probably suit you best.”

“Thank you.” Eve nodded, taking the weapon from him. “And yes, seriously.”

“Uh, well.” Sylvain scratched the back of his neck, glancing over to where Dimitri was attempting to train with a bow. “Yeesh, I thought he was handling it surprisingly well.”

“Sylvain.” Eve raised an eyebrow, hoping her threatening tone was enough to indicate that if Sylvain didn’t tell her what was going on, he was going to get a face full of training lance.

“Linhardt saw His Highness leaving your quarters early this morning with his hair all messy and his uniform wrinkled.” Sylvain offered a somewhat sympathetic frown. “He didn’t think anything of it, but I guess he mentioned it to Dorothea off hand and from there it got spread around pretty quick.”

“Goddess.” Eve sighed, throwing her head back in exasperation. “I almost forgot this is a school and people have nothing better to do than gossip.”

“Hey, I mean, it’s pretty annoying but at least it’s a rumour about you and your future husband.” Sylvain shrugged. “Some might say it’s unconventional, but it’s not like you weren’t ever gonna get busy with His Highness.”

“We didn’t!” Eve hissed, perhaps a bit louder than she had intended, as she snapped her head back up to look at Sylvain. “I didn’t mean for it to happen. I just wanted him to take a little rest, but I ended up falling asleep too.”

“So…” Sylvain drew out the word, again looking back at where Dimitri was. “Nothing happened?”

“The only thing that happened was I got a major crick in my neck from sleeping sitting up.” Eve grimaced.

“Good luck explaining that to Felix.” Sylvain let out a low whistle as he looked over to where the aforementioned boy was tearing a training dummy to shreds with an axe. “I thought the training weapons were too dull to actually cut anything.”

“I’m guessing he’s already caught wind of this rumour?” Eve asked, gently knocking her training lance against Sylvain’s wooden sword in an invitation to spar.

“Yeah, and I might have accidentally fed the flames on that one.” Sylvain sucked in air through his teeth as he half-heartedly swung at Eve.

“Goddess, Sylvain, what did you do?” Eve blocked his attack and smacked him on the arm lightly with her own weapon.

“Well I kind of forgot about the whole love triangle situation you’ve got going on and when he brought it up, I said something along the lines of you getting a head start on the baby-making part of your job as Queen.” Sylvain laughed sheepishly.

“You _what_?” Eve didn’t hold back on her hit this time, hitting Sylvain’s arm with all the force of her anger.

“It was a joke!” Sylvain defended, wincing at the contact. “A bad one, but I didn’t mean anything bad by it. I knew His Highness wouldn’t lay a finger on you.”

“But did you consider that not long ago Felix was convinced I was just throwing myself at any able-bodied male?” Eve hissed as she jabbed at him, though there was considerably less fury behind her attacks now.

“I’m sorry, kitten.” Sylvain said and Eve could tell he was genuinely remorseful. “I wasn’t thinking about it when I said it. And once he got all upset there was no convincing him otherwise.”

“I know, I know.” Eve sighed with a shake of her head. “I just have to think about how I’m going to convince him I didn’t sleep with Dimitri.”

“I mean, technically you did.” Sylvain smirked.

“ _Sylvain_.” Eve jabbed him in the stomach with the butt end of her lance.

“I know, I know.” He smiled when he straightened up from the blow. “Not helping.”

“You’re his best friend.” Eve said as she blocked another swipe from Sylvain. “Tell me how to make this right.”

“You think _I_ know?” Sylvain laughed.

“I have this innate ability at making Felix furious with me whenever I try to talk to him.” Eve grimaced, thinking back to all the other times she had tried to confront Felix.

“I think that’s just what talking to people does to Felix.” Sylvain shrugged noncommittally. “Besides, is this really a bad thing if he thinks you slept with His Highness?”

“What do you mean?” Eve asked, stealing a glance over at the prince and then his childhood friend.

“Well, sooner or later you’re going to have to break things off with Felix, right?” Sylvain cocked his head to the side. “Why not do it now while he’s mad at you anyways than prolong either of your pain?”

“I…” Eve trailed off.

He was right. This could be the perfect time to put a stop to her foolishness. She could lie, tell Felix it wasn’t just a rumour and that she and Dimitri had been intimate. She could say she was accepting her role as Dimitri’s wife. But she didn’t want to lie; not to Felix, not anymore.

“But that’s not what you want, is it?” Sylvain asked when Eve paused.

“Does it matter what I want?” Eve laughed bitterly.

“I’m not the person to ask.” Sylvain shrugged rather unhelpfully, earning himself a glare from Eve. “Listen, you loved Glenn enough to go against everything you had lived by. You would have even defied Rodrigue for him. So maybe now is the time to consider if you’d do the same for Felix. If you’re not ready to shirk your duty for him, is it really fair to keep leading him on?”

Eve was stunned motionless by Sylvain’s words, only reanimating when the flat side of his blade whacked into her ribcage. It was true, she had chalked up her selfish behaviour when it came to Felix to her being bound by her duty to Dimitri. She convinced herself she had always been dutiful, but that wasn’t true. For Glenn, she had thrown caution to the wind. She had told him who—what—she was and had been prepared to go against Rodrigue’s wishes had he not supported their relationship.

“So?” Sylvain raised an eyebrow. He was sneaky, Eve decided, hiding behind a façade of laziness and immaturity when truly he was wiser than he ever let on.

“So, what?” Eve blinked away her thoughts.

“Do you choose Felix or your duty?” Sylvain clarified.

“I don’t…” Eve frowned. “I don’t know.”

“Yeah, sounds about right.” Sylvain laughed, his serious expression quickly gone.

“Sylvain!” Eve couldn’t help the smile that teased the corners of her mouth. She was grateful for him. He was facetious and childish at times, but beneath that he was truly a caring and attentive person. And the best thing about him was that he didn’t want anything from her.

“Come on, kitten, don’t make that face.” Sylvain winked. “You’ll get wrinkles in that pretty little face of yours.”

“You’re a menace.” Eve shook her head lightly. But he was right. She was going to have to decide very soon if she would choose Felix over her duty. And even sooner she was going to have to face Felix and his wrath.

* * *

She hadn’t intentionally left it until this late. In fact, Eve had wanted to talk to Felix as soon as she had heard about the rumour from Sylvain. But she knew she was still under the watchful eye of Rhea and Seteth; she still had to be careful about being seen alone with anyone other than Dimitri.

And to add onto that, the news about Flayn disappearing was shared with everyone at the beginning of their afternoon lectures. The whole of the Academy was sent into disarray, looking for any clues as to where Flayn could have gone. There wasn’t time for Eve to approach Felix when she had been sent to town with Annette and Mercedes to ask if anyone had seen Seteth’s little sister.

Come suppertime, Seteth had asked to see her in his office and she hadn’t had the chance to eat with everyone else. So it wasn’t until now, very late into the night with everyone else long gone to bed, that Eve had the chance to talk to Felix. Luckily, she knew him enough to know that if he was upset, he would still be awake and training.

And sure enough when she pushed open the heavy doors to the training grounds she could see his silhouette training in the moonlight. He moved so gracefully, spinning about as he swung his sword. It was so much like watching a dancer upon the stage, and Eve found herself captivated by him.

“Felix.” She called out to him quietly, almost afraid to be heard.

His movements stopped abruptly, and he turned to face her. Even though he was backlit by the moon and his face was nearly impossible to see, Eve could tell he was grimacing. And suddenly, Eve realised she didn’t know what to say. She had had all day to figure it out, and yet still she had no clue what to say to him.

“Felix.” She repeated his name lamely, clearing her throat and walking towards him.

“What?” He crossed his arms as he watched her approach.

“Can we talk?” Eve asked before casting a glance at the weapon still in his hand. “Without the sword?”

She followed him silently as he walked to return his training sword to its rightful place on the wall. He was quiet, as if he were contemplating something. Eve noted that he didn’t necessarily seem as angry as she had expected. He was certainly mad, she could tell that much, but it wasn’t the type of fury that she had seen this morning. It was as if he had decided something. And as he turned to her with an unknown determination in his eyes, she found herself somewhat frightened.

His eyes swept up and down her body as if assessing her in the dim light. Suddenly, he stalked towards her. And even though he was shorter than her, however marginally, Eve felt intimidated. She took a small step back, unsure of what exactly Felix was planning to do.

“I’ll show you.” Felix’s voice was nearly a growl.

“Show me what?” Eve asked quietly, noticing that now she was backed up against a pillar. He was being rather unlike himself. She had been prepared for him to yell, argue, be angry with her. She was better equipped for his usual biting commentary than whatever this was.

“That I’m better than the boar.”

With that, his lips were on hers. Once again, Eve found herself on the receiving end of a sudden kiss from Felix. And once again, she found herself unable, or unwilling, to push him away.

Just as ever, he was overeager and inexperienced, however Eve found it somewhat endearing. He had one hand on Eve’s waist, the other tangled in her hair, as he used his entire body to push her into the pillar behind her. Meanwhile, her own hands found their way up to his face, pulling him closer to her.

“Felix.” His name came out as half a sigh when he stopped his onslaught on her lips to trail kisses down her throat.

Her voice wasn’t nearly as commanding as she wanted it to be and Eve chastised herself.

“Felix.” She tried again more forcefully as he nipped at her collarbone a little too hard. His hand on her waist had been steadily travelling north and was dangerously close to cupping the underside of her breast. “You have to stop.”

“I’ll make you forget the boar.” He growled lowly into her ear.

“Stop this.” Finally, Eve grabbed him by the shoulders, pushing him away to hold him at arm’s length. “There’s nothing to forget, Dimitri and I didn’t do anything.”

“You expect me to believe that?” He scoffed.

“You really think Dimitri would have had the gall to touch me?” Eve asked back.

“I think that you’re very good at getting what you want from people.” Felix narrowed his eyes at her.

“Do you think this is what I want?” Eve asked gently.

It was an unfair question to ask, given she herself didn’t know what she wanted. But she knew for a fact that she didn’t want whatever this was between her and Felix. She didn’t want him to be angry, didn’t want him to feel like he needed to be forceful to get her attention.

Slowly, Eve cupped Felix’s cheek in one hand. She caressed his skin gently as she leaned forward to place a delicate kiss on his nose, his cheekbone, the corner of his mouth. And as she did so she realised this is what she wanted. She wanted peace, just a moment of quiet to be tender with a person she held dear.

“Not everything is a battle, Felix.” Eve sighed. “I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you sooner. The truth is, I tried to get Dimitri to take a nap and I ended up falling asleep too. That’s all that happened. He left once he woke up.”

“But it’s going to happen eventually.” Felix said bitterly, avoiding her eyes.

“What is?” Eve frowned, still caressing Felix’s cheek with her thumb.

“Sooner or later the boar will know you carnally.” Felix’s cheeks flushed crimson. He seemed almost ashamed to Eve, fists balled at his sides. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. When I think about it, all I want is for you to think of me whenever he touches you.”

“It won’t happen for quite some time.” Eve said softly. “And I’m sorry, but I can’t allow myself to know you in that way either.”

“Can’t or won’t?” Felix sneered.

“Both.” Eve sighed. “You’re young, Felix. You forget that there are years that separate us.”

It was something Eve had considered way back when Rodrigue introduced her to Dimitri. Even only taking her physical age into account, Eve’s body was still five years older than Dimitri was when they had met. And though she knew it to be rather arbitrary given her true age, she had vowed to herself not to touch him until he had turned eighteen at least.

“I’ve forgotten nothing.” Felix interjected.

“By the time you’re of age, I’ll have already married Dimitri.” Eve continued. “It’s bad enough I allow myself to be like this with you now because I know I’m simply leading you on. Come the Ethereal Moon, I know I will put an end to all this.”

“I don’t get you.” Felix shook his head with a bitter laugh. “You defied orders to tell me the truth about your connection to my family. Then you defied orders again to save me by using your Crest. But you act like your hands are tied when it comes to your wedding.”

“I…” Eve bit her lip as she thought of what to say. “There’s a lot I can’t…won’t say. I have my reasons for keeping the truth to myself. I told you the truth and used my Crest to save you not because you’re Felix, but because you’re Fraldarius.”

“What does that mean?” Felix narrowed his eyes, scrutinising her face as if looking for any trace of her lying.

“I did those things because of my duty to House Fraldarius, not because of any feelings I have for you.” Eve elaborated. “That is why I can justify those actions to myself. But betraying Dimitri for you would be entirely selfish and completely because I have feelings for you. There’d be no excuse.”

Felix seemed to contemplate this for a moment. Eve could tell he was holding back his anger, trying to stay rational rather than lashing out at her. He was clenching and unclenching his fists at his sides as he thought, clearly battling with something internally.

And as he did this, Eve wondered how she had managed to mess everything up so spectacularly. All she had had to do was marry Dimitri and be a good little wife. But that taste of freedom leaving Fraldarius territory had given her was so tantalising. Suddenly, she had started living as a young woman again rather than a servant hidden away from prying eyes. It wasn’t that she had been unhappy serving the Fraldarius family, after all it had been her idea. But she had longed for more and coming to Garreg Mach with Dimitri had been that something more for her. She got greedy, though, and now her hubris was hurting those around her.

“Three months.” Felix muttered finally.

“What?” Eve snapped out of her thoughts to look at him.

“We have three months until you marry the boar, right?” Felix looked at her with determination.

“That’s correct.” She nodded, unsure of where he was going with this.

“Then…” He blushed, averting his eyes, as if he had suddenly lost all of the confidence he had started this conversation with. “Let me have you for three months.”

“What do you mean?” Eve’s brow furrowed in confusion.

“I want… to…” Felix still couldn’t meet her eyes, turning redder by the moment. “Are you really going to make me say all this?”

“I at least need you to say enough for me to understand what you’re talking about.” Eve smiled softly with an exhale.

“You came in here like you wanted to tell me you couldn’t talk to me anymore. I really hate having you avoid me.” Felix looked at her with herculean effort as if trying to convey his intentions to her solely through his gaze. “You said come the Ethereal Moon you’ll have to put an end to whatever is going on between us.”

“Yes.” Eve nodded in confirmation, still completely confused as to what Felix was saying.

“So, wait until the Ethereal Moon.” He said. “Don’t… don’t cut me off until then.”

“Felix, are you sure?” Eve asked, finally understanding. “Even knowing I’ll marry Dimitri in the end?”

“Don’t get me wrong.” Felix shook his head. “I still fully intend to convince you not to marry the boar. But I can’t do that if I let you forget what you feel for me.”

“You’re rather confident.” Eve couldn’t help but laugh. In the back of her head, though, all her reason was screaming at her not to do this. She was only going to feed her selfish desires even more. And on top of that if they were caught there was no telling the retribution that would come from Rhea.

“I never lose.” He replied with determination.

 _Except to me_ , Eve couldn’t help but think.

“So give me until the Ethereal Moon.” Felix reiterated when Eve didn’t reply, leaning forward to place a kiss on Eve’s lips as if to seal the deal.

She was surprised at how gentle it was given the other kisses they had shared. But the other times he had kissed her had been to plead for her attention. They had all been outbursts, rash action taken in the heat of the moment. But this kiss didn’t beg for anything. It was more a promise, a vow not to let her go until the very end. And despite all reason Eve allowed herself to be persuaded.


	28. Twenty-Seven

Eve bit at her thumb absently as she looked into her teacup. Her eyes were glazed over, not even really looking at the drink. And she most definitely wasn’t looking at the two parties across the table from her who were watching her with intense scrutiny.

“Eve.” Seteth cleared his throat.

“I’m thinking.” She muttered, just barely turning her head in his direction though her eyes were still on her tea.

“You are the only person outside of myself and the Archbishop who knows the truth about Flayn’s blood.” Seteth was fighting to keep his voice level, still deeply shaken by Flayn’s disappearance. “If there is any possibility you’ve told anyone I need to know.”

“You know how good at secrets I am.” Eve finally looked at Seteth. “And if you’re trying to insinuate that I had anything to do with this, you’re wrong.”

“You’ve made no secret of your disdain for myself and the Archbishop.” Seteth responded with a hard glare. “And I know you are angry at Lady Rhea for moving your wedding date.”

“I’m angry at Rhea.” Eve shook her head. “Flayn’s got nothing to do with that.”

Eve looked down at her tea once more. She was absolutely certain she hadn’t spoken to anyone about Flayn. Even Glenn wouldn’t have known because it had nothing to do with Eve. She would have had no reason to tell anyone.

“I wouldn’t hurt Flayn.” Eve said softly. “She’s family.”

Seteth drew back at that with a small gasp. Rhea had explained to him that Eve knew the nature of who he and Flayn truly were, but nothing as to why she knew that. And though he knew Eve had been to the monastery years ago, he had never had any contact with her. He didn’t understand the conflict between Rhea and Eve, he was just aware of it.

“Rhea?” Seteth turned to the Archbishop for confirmation.

Rather than reply to Seteth’s questioning look, Rhea instead regarded Eve with narrowed eyes. Eve met the Archbishop’s gaze with her own confident one, her chin angled up in defiance. Was Rhea truly so foolish as to believe Eve would have anything to do with Flayn’s disappearance?

“I didn’t bring you here to interrogate you, child.” Rhea said finally, taking a sip of her tea. “I know you would not hurt Flayn.”

“But you’re worried.” Eve said, watching Rhea closely. “Whoever did this knows about Flayn. So how much else do they know?”

“Precisely.” The Archbishop nodded. “We are all of us in trouble.”

“Rhea,” Eve said firmly, “you know I will never agree with you. But I will never forget the pain of losing my parents and my brother. I will do what it takes to cling to what family I do have left; I’ll do everything I can to bring Flayn back safe and sound.”

Having said her piece, Eve got up from the table and moved to leave the Archbishop’s chambers. Neither Rhea nor Seteth tried to stop her as she left, both knowing that she had been genuine in her remarks.

“Rhea, how much does that child know?” Seteth asked tentatively once the door had shut behind Eve.

“Eve knows the nature of who we are.” Rhea replied rather vaguely.

“She said Flayn was family.” Seteth’s brow furrowed in thought. “Is she…?”

“No.” Rhea shook her head softly with a smile. “Eve was born outside of Fodlan. But her mother was… someone very dear to me.”

“Rhea, please.” Seteth pleaded. “Who is this girl to you? I have made it known to you that I think she is dangerous given her defiance towards you. If there is a reason you keep her close, I must know.”

“You have no reason to be worried, Seteth.” Rhea comforted. “She is but an Aegir Hound—all bark and no bite.”

“You cannot possibly know that for sure, Rhea.” Seteth cautioned.

He could tell the Archbishop was sure in her assessment, but he couldn’t help but worry. First hiring the Professor without his counsel and now having Eve come to the monastery. She was acting on knowledge he was not privy to, and it concerned him.

“You do not know Eve as I do.” Rhea replied. “She did everything she could to keep herself from me, but never once did she consider leaving Fodlan. Eve has only ever wanted to live quietly and yet she agreed to become the future Queen of Faerghus because it was the only option where she could stay in Fodlan without having to join the Church.”

“That does not guarantee that she will not one day turn her blade toward the Church of Serios.” Seteth still didn’t understand Rhea’s reasoning. “Lonato was one thing, but the power of her Crest when turned against us could be dangerous.”

“Betraying us, betraying the Church, would put Fodlan’s balance in peril.” Rhea continued, just as calm as ever despite Seteth’s growing anxiety. “I do not believe someone who has fought so hard to remain in Fodlan would want to see it come to ruin. And I do not believe that Eve would ever do anything to put her beloved House Fraldarius in harm’s way.”

“That is simply speculation, Rhea, please reconsider this.” Seteth found himself pleading once more. Any danger that was invited into the walls of Garreg Mach was one more thing that could potentially harm Flayn.

“Seteth.” Rhea said firmly. “Just as Eve sees us as family, I see her as family. I have searched for her for years. And now that I finally have her back, I will not cast her away. She is not a danger to you or Flayn, I promise you this.”

Seteth was still unsure of Eve’s loyalties, but he trusted the Archbishop. If Rhea was so sure that Eve would never betray them, then he would have to believe her. Besides, he couldn’t deny the fact that Eve had seemed genuinely troubled by Flayn’s disappearance. And she had seemed so determined to see her back to the monastery safely. Regardless of her motives, if Eve could aide in returning Flayn to him quickly he would be satisfied for now.

* * *

Sylvain was surprised when Eve came knocking on his door that afternoon. She was supposedly on her best behaviour lately which meant no being alone with any man other than Dimitri. And yet there she was in his doorway asking if she could come in.

“I’ve got a lot on my mind right now. I…” She sighed. “I don’t really want to be alone with my thoughts.”

Sylvain, of course, let her in. He wasn’t going to leave a friend in need to the dogs. He also reminded her that she didn’t need to explain herself to him when she told him that Dimitri knew she was there and would come get her for dinner so that no one would be the wiser about her being alone with him.

They settled into his bed, Sylvain laying on his back with his head propped up by his pillows and his arms and Eve sitting cross-legged with her back to him. He listened patiently as she relayed to him Felix’s plea for her to give him until the wedding before she cut him off. And Sylvain didn’t interject when she rattled off why this was a terrible idea. The way she spoke, he knew very well that she had already come to her own conclusion. That despite how selfish and dangerous and ultimately more painful it was, she was going to entertain Felix’s request.

“Do you love him?” He asked when she had finally finished speaking.

“How could I possibly know that, Sylvain?” She looked over her shoulder at him. “I haven’t known him in this capacity long enough to love him.”

“Both Dimitri and Felix have known you the same amount of time you’ve known them and they both love you.” Sylvain shrugged.

“It’s infatuation.” Eve shook her head. “They’ve never been in love before.”

“What will you do if you fall in love with him, then?” Sylvain asked.

He was genuinely curious. As it stood, Eve clearly had feelings for Felix. So, if she entertained those feelings for the next four months, there was the possibility that she would actually fall in love with him.

“I don’t know.” She admitted, hanging her head. “I think like with a lot of things I’ve just convinced myself that I’ll deal with it when I get to it.”

“If that’s your plan, then that’s your plan.” Sylvain said nonchalantly.

“Yeah, some plan.”

Silence fell over them and Sylvain watched Eve’s back carefully. It seemed there was a lot more on her mind, but he wasn’t going to pry. She hadn’t pried when he didn’t talk about what happened at Conand Tower.

So as he laid there, Sylvain reached out to gently trace patterns on Eve’s back. He hoped it came off as a comforting gesture. At the very least, Eve didn’t tell him to stop. And as he drew swirls between her shoulder blades, he could have sworn he saw some of the tension release from her posture.

“I’ve been meaning to ask.” Sylvain mused as he ran a finger down her spine.

“Hm?” She muttered in acknowledgement.

“You’ve got that scar on your back.” Sylvain remembered when he had first seen Eve without her clothes, and he had been surprised by the number of scars that marred her body. But none had been so shocking as the one that raged all the way from her right shoulder to her left hip.

“What about it.” She didn’t seem guarded at all, so Sylvain figured it wasn’t a delicate subject.

“If you can transfer injuries with your Crest, why do you have that scar?” As he spoke, Sylvain walked his fingers down the path where he remembered the scar to be. “Or any of them for that matter.”

“It’s a reminder.” She said, lifting her head to look up at the ceiling.

“A reminder?” He echoed curiously.

“That even I can be beat.” She answered. There wasn’t particularly any emotion to her voice, but that hollowness was more jarring to Sylvain than any sadness would have been.

“What happened?” He asked gently as his fingers continued to trail along her back.

“We were invaded from the south.” Eve started. “They killed my father right before my eyes—twice.”

“Twice?” Sylvain asked before really thinking about it.

“The first time, I was foolish enough to reveal my power to the invaders.” Eve’s voice was still unaffected by any emotion which was surprising given how passionate she was about so many other things. “They simply killed him again. But seeing the power of my Crest, they took my brother and mother captive. They threatened to kill them if I didn’t comply with their wishes, knowing that I could revive them only once.”

“I’m sorry, kitten, I didn’t mean to bring up something like that.” Sylvain sat up, placing a hand on Eve’s shoulder and turning her so she had to face him.

“It’s okay.” She said. And he realised that though her voice was eerily calm, her eyes were wet with tears that refused to fall. “It’s nice to not have to keep it to myself.”

“So what happened?” Sylvain asked, concern creasing his brow. “Only if you want to talk about it.”

“I was a pawn to the invading forces for two months while they ravaged our country.” Eve continued, eyes glazing over as if she were living it all over again. “I loved my family, Sylvain. I would have done anything for them.”

“I’m sure you did.” Sylvain murmured, tucking her head under his chin as he pulled her into his chest.

Meanwhile, a rather narcissistic portion of his mind found pride in the fact that Eve would share this with him. No one else expected or believed any emotional depth from him, and yet he was the one Eve came to for comfort.

“I did everything I could to keep my mother and brother alive.” Eve confessed. “I thought I was doing right by them. But in the end, they begged for me to kill them.”

“Oh, kitten.” Sylvain sighed, unable to form any other words of meaning.

“They sacrificed their lives— agreed to die if it meant I could go on living.” Eve leaned further into Sylvain’s chest as if seeking refuge there. “So I slipped them a poison made from flowers native to our region. It was a painless death. I made sure they were gone before I tried to escape.”

“I’m so sorry.” Sylvain wrapped his arms around her tightly. “That couldn’t have been easy.”

“I didn’t even get the chance to mourn.” Eve laughed bitterly. “For their sacrifice to be worth it, I had to be focused on escaping.”

“How did you get out, then?” Sylvain asked.

“I wasn’t physically held anywhere because my captors knew that as long as they had my family I wouldn’t do anything rash.” Eve explained. “So, all I had to do was leave. But very quickly they noticed my absence and sent whole battalions after me. While I was escaping, I got hit with a particularly strong spell. That’s what gave me that scar on my back.”

“I see.” Sylvain murmured, almost sorry that he had even brought this up in the first place.

“It was the price I paid to live.” Eve continued. “And I kept the wound as a reminder. So that I would never forget what was sacrificed.”

“Now I feel like an ass moaning about how my Crest ruined my life when all I had to deal with was my brother being mean to me.” Sylvain tried to smile in an attempt to lighten to mood.

“Crests are supposed to be a blessing.” Eve sighed as she removed herself from Sylvain’s arms to stand up and stretch as if deciding she had simply had enough of being sad. “But are any of us better off because of them?”

“Beats me.” Sylvain shrugged, watching as Eve rolled her neck as she stretched her arms above her head.

“By the way.” Eve stopped her stretching to look at Sylvain with a curious frown. “Why do you always call me ‘kitten’? I never hear you call any other girls by a pet name.”

“Well, at first it was just a fun nickname. Plus, it was fun to tease Felix because he’d get mad whenever I called you that.” Sylvain admitted with a grin. “But to be honest now it’s because I don’t know what to call you.”

“What do you mean?” Eve cocked her head to the side.

“Well, your name isn’t Eve.” Sylvain lowered his voice even though they were alone. “At first I thought maybe you’d appreciate being called your real name in private, but then I got afraid that I’d slip up and call you the wrong thing in front of everyone else. But now ‘Eve’ just doesn’t feel right.”

“Hm.” Eve hummed, tapping her index finger to her lips. “Well, I think I like it.”

Before Sylvain could respond, there was a knock at his door.

“It’s me.” It was His Highness’ voice that came through the crack and Eve was the first to move to open the door for him.

“Dimitri.” Eve greeted him with a smile that even Sylvain thought was convincing.

“Are you okay?” Dimitri’s brow furrowed immediately, though, much to Sylvain’s surprise.

“What do you mean?” Eve blinked, somewhat taken aback. “Of course I’m okay.”

“You seem as if you were about to cry.” He replied softly, half reaching out towards her face but stopping himself before he could touch her.

It was honestly frightening how well His Highness could read Eve. She was guarded and incredibly talented in masking her intentions. And though he didn’t press when Eve assured him she was fine, it was clear to Sylvain that he wasn’t persuaded despite how convincing her performance was. Anyone else would have accepted her smile and nods of assurance, yet His Highness seemed to see right through it all. And Sylvain found himself wondering whether Felix could understand Eve in the way Dimitri did. Or whether being understood in that way was even something she wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who has two thumbs and doesn't know how to properly end a chapter???  
> This gal.


	29. Twenty-Eight

In the end, Sylvain, Dimitri, and Eve didn’t even make it to the dining hall for dinner. As they came down the dormitory steps by the greenhouse, they saw Byleth running towards them with unusual urgency. Trailing behind her were several of their other classmates.

“Dimitri.” Byleth called out as she saw the three of them.

“Professor.” He regarded her with surprise. “What is going on?”

“I have reason to believe Jeritza is responsible for Flayn’s disappearance.” She responded. “The other knights have noticed him behaving strangely. And Manuela was seen hurrying somewhere with a mask that might have been his; no one has seen her since.”

“I agree his actions sound suspicious.” Dimitri brought a gloved hand up to his chin in thought. “But is that enough to brazenly pursue him with our blades ready?”

“Another student heard a scream come from nearby his quarters.” Byleth added. “I ran to gather as many of you as I could before confronting him.”

“Then I suppose we have no time to waste.” Dimitri nodded in agreement.

In their haste, they were unable to find every member of the Blue Lions class before making their way to Jeritza’s quarters. But both Byleth and Dimitri had agreed that the numbers they had would suffice and that time was of the essence. In the end, their group comprised of all the original members of the class with the addition of Eve and Linhardt, though the latter complained about having been roped in. Byleth would have hoped for the assistance of the Ashen Wolves, however the entrance to Abyss was clear across campus from where they needed to be and they had no time to waste.

“Isn’t that… Professor Manuela!” Dimitri called out as soon as they entered Jeritza’s quarters.

He rushed forward to where the Golden Deer’s professor was collapsed on the ground, unconscious.

“Professor Manuela! Please wake up!” Annette squeaked as they all came to stand around her. “Professor Manuela!”

“Is she injured?” Byleth asked, kneeling down next to Dimitri.

“She’s still breathing.” He said after a pause where he held his hand out to feel the breath from her nose. “But she needs medical attention immediately!”

“Look! Do you see Professor Manuela's hand? It's like she's pointing at something...” Annette piped up before they could move the former songstress.

“I see it! Behind that shelf!” Dimitri followed Manuela’s hand to a bookshelf that was left slightly askew. “Could it be a secret passage?”

“Move.” Eve interjected, shoving her way between Dedue and Felix to kneel next to Dimitri and Byleth.

“What are you doing?” It was Felix who reacted first, snatching Eve’s wrist when she held out her hand over Professor Manuela’s form.

“Isn’t it obvious?” She looked up at him with a quizzical look, surprised to see the concern in his eyes.

“Your power is to transfer, not heal.” He frowned, holding Eve’s gaze intensely. “Who the hell are you planning on transferring that wound to?”

“Myself.” She answered simply as if it should have been obvious.

To her it was the most logical solution. She knew that the wound Manuela sustained could very easily become fatal. But she also knew that her body would be able to handle it. Eve could heal much better than Manuela or any of the Blue Lions.

“Are you insane?” Felix hissed at her, his grip on her wrist tightening.

“Eve, you cannot do that.” Dimitri looked at her with concern.

“You can’t tell me what to do with my own power.” Eve retorted.

“Like hell he can’t.” Felix grimaced. “I don’t like agreeing with the boar, but he’s right.”

“I know I can’t tell you what to do, Eve.” Dimitri’s gaze softened. “But not only is it brash, we also don’t know what awaits us in that passage. We need you at your best. A wound like that will take a lot of your energy.”

Eve’s outstretched hand faltered, her fingers closing into a fist until eventually her arm went slack in Felix’s grip.

“You’re right.” She sighed. “But we need to get Manuela some help fast.”

“What is the meaning of... Wait, is that Manuela?” At that moment, Professor Hanneman barged into the room. “What happened here? We must take her to the infirmary immediately. You! Don't just stand there! Help me carry her.”

He pointed at Dimitri, instantly delegating that the prince would assist him in carrying Manuela to the infirmary. Dimitri seemed to hesitate for a moment, eyes flashing back to the secret passageway that was still mostly obscured. It was clear he wanted to stay and fight, but he couldn’t abandon Professor Manuela.

“Of course.” He nodded, taking hold of Manuela’s feet as Hanneman hooked his arms under hers. “I’ll return shortly, Professor.”

With Professor Manuela safely on her way to the infirmary, the remaining Blue Lions made their way down the hidden passage. It was dark and dank, but they were met by no enemies as they made their way deeper in. Finally, they all made their way to a larger opening in which several lit lamps cast an eerie glow.

“What is this place? It's so...BAH!” Annette was glancing around anxiously when she suddenly cried out. “I see someone! I think...they're unconscious.”

“Is it Flayn?” Byleth strained her eyes in the darkness to make out two figures on the ground.

“Yes, I see Flayn!” Ingrid shouted in excitement before adding with confusion, “but...who is this other person?”

Before any of them could make a move towards the two girls, an intimidating shadow emerged from the darkness surrounded by soldiers.

“That sword. You must be...” The figure’s ghastly voice echoed on the stone walls as a few of his soldiers grabbed the two unconscious girls. “One of us will die, the other will live. I will enjoy this dance of damnation.”

With that, he turned his steed and continued deeper down the passageway into the shadows. He was followed by most of his men, however a handful of them stayed behind as if to ensure the Professor and her students wouldn’t be able to follow.

“That knight looks like death itself. We must rescue Flayn immediately.” Dedue said with determination.

“We don’t have the luxury of time to strategize.” Byleth’s brow furrowed as she regarded her students. “Stay in pairs, watch each other’s backs. Our aim is to move fast and rescue Flayn. Do not engage that knight on your own.”

With that the Blue Lions split off rather naturally, gravitating towards the person they knew they would be best suited fighting with in this situation. Eve and Felix took the charge, both rushing forward together to clash with the first of the enemies.

“What the hell was that back there?” Felix asked as they fought back to back.

“I was afraid Professor Manuela was going to die.” Eve answered honestly. “It was just instinct.”

“You thought she might die, so your solution was to give _yourself_ the fatal wound?” Felix hissed as he sliced through an enemy soldier. “What are you, some kind of idiot?”

“Perhaps.” Eve conceded.

“The boar told me what you did in Conand Tower.” Felix said after a moment of pause.

Eve didn’t answer, instead focusing on covering ground. The two of them had been able to weave through most of the conflict, trusting their classmates to clean up the enemies while they pursued after the Death Knight and Flayn. But at the back of the first room was a large gate guarded by two men. Felix and Eve made quick work of the men but found that neither of them carried the key to the gate.

“Cover me.” Eve said, crouching to inspect the lock.

“What do you intend to do without the key?” Felix asked sceptically though he took up position to protect Eve.

“The lock’s made of iron.” Eve replied, holding her hands over said lock. “I’m going to try to melt it off with a fire spell.”

“You can do that?” Felix asked incredulously.

“I don’t know!” Eve admitted. “If Yuri were here, he could pick the lock. But he’s not. We’ve got to try what we can.”

Eve didn’t wait for Felix’s reply and instead focused on casting her spell. She knew she wasn’t a particularly strong magic user outside of her Crest’s power, but Fire was one of the most basic spells. And after training to build up her magic ability with Byleth, Eve was at least confident her ability of this one spell.

“What if you died?” Felix asked suddenly as Eve continued to work on the lock.

“What?” She asked, too focused to think.

“At Conand Tower.” He clarified. “You used all your energy to protect us, you left yourself vulnerable. What if you died?”

“I wasn’t vulnerable, I had Yuri.” She muttered. “I told him what I planned to do and asked him to cover me.”

“You trusted that rat bastard to protect you?” Felix barked. It was clear he was angry, but not in his usual way. He seemed angry because he was worried. “Why didn’t you tell me or even the boar?”

“Because you two would have tried to stop me.” Eve said, rather matter of fact.

“You’re damn right I would have!” Felix turned his head just long enough to shoot Eve a glare. “What good was any of this if you die?”

At that, the lock finally gave as the mechanism melted away and fell in a molten heap on the ground. Eve felt her heart ache at the genuine sound of worry in Felix’s voice. It wasn’t something she had ever heard before, even at times when she knew he had been worried. Quickly, she stood up and placed a hand on Felix’s shoulder, turning him to her.

“I won’t die on you.” She said, looking directly in his eyes. “Promise.”

It was the kind of promise no one should ever make. Because, truly, there was no way for Eve to guarantee she would not die before Felix. She had no idea what kind of world awaited her in the future. But Eve also knew that, so far, she had outlived everyone else in her life. For reasons she would never convey to Felix, she could not die unless killed. If she had lived this long without being killed, she was sure she could outlast him.

Felix swallowed the words that bubbled up in his throat and instead pushed through the now open gate with Eve. Dedue and Ashe were not far behind now after Eve had taken the time to melt the lock. While this meant they had sufficient backup, it also meant that the two of them couldn’t speak as freely.

Leaving their conversation on hold, Eve and Felix instead focused on the fight in front of them. They fought like no other pair on the battlefield. Felix found himself not even needing to convey his strategies to Eve as he cut his way through enemies. She could read the miniscule movements in his stance or the swing of his sword to anticipate his next move. It was the reason he, rather frustratingly, could never best her in battle. But here, it was vital to their victory. She knew where he would need to be covered and where she should focus her next attack.

“Dedue!” Eve called out as an arrow flew over a wall straight towards him.

He turned at the sound of her voice but was unable to fully avoid the projectile that found purchase on his thigh. Dedue grunted in pain as an angry line of red blossomed on his upper leg. But the pain and the wound instantly disappeared paired with the glow of Eve’s crest. He looked up at her, dumbfounded, but then nodded in appreciation before returning to his fighting.

“Idiot!” Felix snatched Eve’s outstretched hand angrily.

“We’ve got to take care of that archer.” Eve said, looking at the wall the arrow had flown over and effectively ignoring Felix’s anger.

Still ignoring Felix, she pushed forward into the next room with him trailing close behind. Together, they made quick work of the archer and the other soldiers there. Felix didn’t speak as they fought, but Eve could practically feel the malice emanating from his body.

Only when they had cleared the room did they take a moment’s pause. Eve turned to face Felix, noticing a nick on his cheek.

“You’re hurt.” She reached out to swipe her thumb across his cheek in concern.

And right before Felix’s eyes, a small cut opened up on Eve’s left cheekbone as the pain in his own subsided.

“Eve!” He barked, swatting her hand away. “Stop doing that.”

“It’s fine.” She smiled softly. “One or two won’t use up all of my stamina.”

“That’s not the issue here!” Felix grimaced. “That cut was nothing, you didn’t need to do that. Why are you taking on other people’s pain?”

“Because I can.” Eve blinked, taken aback by Felix’s tone.

“That’s a stupid reason.” He gritted his teeth. “Just… whatever! We need to get to Flayn.”

He seemed to bite back all the other things he wanted to say, realising that the mission was more important. Eve got the feeling, however, that this conversation was far from over. And as they went on fighting, now with the rest of the class mostly caught up as they entered the large room at the end of the passage, Eve couldn’t help but repeat Felix’s question in her mind.

_Why are you taking on other people’s pain?_

The words echoed in her mind, but she couldn’t properly focus on them. Saving Flayn was the most important thing; she had promised Seteth. And a rather self-indulgent part of her mind hoped that if she saved Flayn, the Archbishop would allow her a little more freedom.

It was Annette who defeated the mage with the key to the final door—a behemoth of wood and iron that separated the Blue Lions from the Death Knight and Flayn. By then, everyone had managed to regroup in the main room, forming a semi-circle around the door.

“Professor?” Ashe looked towards Byleth for guidance as they all paused. “What should we do?”

Byleth frowned—if the Death Knight was truly Jeritza, he would be a formidable opponent. It was dangerous to send her students into there, but she also knew she wouldn’t be able to handle him on her own.

“We can’t allow ourselves to be bottlenecked in the doorway.” Byleth’s frown deepened as she thought. “Linhardt, Mercedes—I want the two of you to stay at the back. We’ll need you both if anyone gets injured.”

“I’m happy to oblige.” Linhardt replied. “All that fighting’s really worn me out.”

“Eve.” Byleth now turned her gaze towards Dimitri’s fiancée where she stood next to Felix. “Can I ask you to cover us?”

“Of course.” Eve nodded firmly, consciously making sure not to look at Felix.

“I want to focus an all-out attack on the Death Knight.” Byleth addressed the whole class now. “I believe if we eliminate him, the rest of the forces will retreat. But we need to be quick and careful—Eve won’t be able to protect us all indefinitely.”

Eve knew that Felix was not happy about this plan. But there was no doubt in her mind that he also knew it was the most reasonable tactic they could use. As long as none of them suffered fatal wounds, Eve could make sure they were at their strongest to take down the Death Knight. Her Crest would also act as on the offensive if she were able to redirect any injuries onto the Death Knight.

And it paid off in the end. It all happened so quickly, from the Professor unlocking and busting open the door to the Blue Lions storming in to the Death Knight taking a particularly incapacitating arrow to the shoulder from Ashe.

But just as they all believed they might be able to take down this Death Knight, a new mysterious figure warped into the room.

“Halt.” They spoke to the Death Knight. “You’re having a bit too much fun.”

“You are getting in the way of my game.” He replied gravely, not even turning to look at the figure.

“You'll have more opportunities to play soon.” They said with a harrumph. “Your work here is done.”

“Understood. I will go…” And with that, before any of them could react, he warped away out of their clutches once more.

“We will cross paths again. I am the Flame Emperor...” The mysterious addition now addressed Byleth directly. “It is I who will re-forge the world.”

And just as suddenly as they had appeared, the so-called Flame Emperor warped away with the rest of their forces.

“Flame Emperor and the Death Knight? I have to say, they both looked very dangerous.” Mercedes’ brow furrowed in concern.

“Where did they go?” Ingrid looked around as if to find any clues before her eyes fell to Flayn and the other girl. “It doesn't matter. We need to get these two out of here.”

“Bring them up.” Dedue said, motioning for the others to help him carry the two girls.

“You alright?” Felix came up to Eve where she was leaning against the wall.

“You guys took a lot of damage.” She tried to laugh but was clearly fatigued.

“Lean on me.” Felix wouldn’t meet her eye, but he offered his arm for Eve to take. “We’ve got to get back up to Jeritza’s room.”

Eve didn’t protest and slung her arm around his neck to lean on him. He wrapped his arm around her waist to support her. And though the action itself had been done with such confidence, Eve glanced up to see his face ablaze with blush.

She relished this moment despite how heavy her limbs felt. No one could say outright that Felix wasn’t just assisting his classmate. In this state, she had a reason to be leaning on him. And Eve could indulge in his warmth as he helped her back through the passage.

By the time the two of them made it back up to Jeritza’s quarters, the others had gone to take Flayn and the other unconscious girl up to the infirmary. They came into the room as Dimitri and the Professor were talking, both smiling.

Eve wondered at the smile that graced Dimitri’s face. While she didn’t think she’d ever seen Byleth smile, she was still more shocked by how genuine Dimitri’s smile was. He smiled often, but Eve could always see the darkness that lurked behind it. This smile, however, was genuine and he looked truly happy.

It was a weight off her chest, seeing him like that. It made Eve feel as though she had trusted the right person to be Dimitri’s support. And she was glad to see the Professor was holding true to their agreement.

“Felix, Eve.” Dimitri’s smile dropped when he saw the two of them, eyes darting from where Eve was clinging to Felix’s neck to where Felix had his hand resting comfortably on Eve’s waist.

“I’m sorry for asking you to do that, Eve.” Byleth said, turning to Eve with concern in her eyes. “I’m very grateful for you, though.”

“I would have done it regardless, Professor.” Eve smiled while both boys in the room shot her looks of disapproval.

“Thank you for assisting my _fiancée_ , Felix.” Dimitri said with a tight smile, nothing like the one that had made his eyes sparkle earlier.

But he made no move to remove Eve from his childhood friend’s arms. He was determined to make good on his promise; he would not touch Eve unless she asked it of him. And regardless of how much he wished he could wrap her in his arms and carry her to her quarters, Dimitri refrained from making any type of movement.

A part of him hoped that Eve would tell Felix she was fine and that Dimitri could help her from here. But looking at her, seeing how comfortable she was in his arms, he knew she would never say that. He knew enough to recognise that Eve was exactly where she wanted to be.

“I’ll have to report to Seteth.” Byleth broke the tense silence that had filled the room momentarily. “Thank you all for your assistance. And I’m sorry that we had to do this so late.”

Byleth left the three of them as they all exited Jeritza’s quarters into the cool night air. It was dark now, the dinner hour having long passed.

“I’ll take my leave now as well.” Dimitri said suddenly. “You two should see if there’s any food left in the dining hall.”

“Thank you, Dimitri.” Eve smiled softly.

He almost asked her what she was thanking him for when he caught her eye and understood exactly what she meant. She knew he was allowing her and Felix to have a moment alone. And though it pained him greatly, he found comfort in his ability to make Eve happy in this way. Without another word, he nodded curtly and removed himself—unwilling to linger any longer lest he regret his decision.

“Let’s get you some food.” Felix said once Dimitri had also left them.

“That sounds good.” Eve nodded. “But I think I can walk on my own now, thank you.”

As she tried to pull away Felix’s grip on her waist tightened, bringing her closer to him.

“No, I don’t think you can.” He said, refusing to meet her eyes.

“Hm, I suppose you’re right.” Eve smiled as she saw the blush once again creeping onto Felix’s cheeks. “I suppose there’s no helping it then.”

And so they walked together, bodies pressed close. Neither one said a word as they made their way to the dining hall but they both knew what they were doing. And though it was just one small moment of many they were not allowed to have, they both felt pride in this little victory they had stolen from their circumstances.


	30. Twenty-Nine

There were only a few scraps left from dinner by the time Felix and Eve got to the dining hall. Felix had sat her down at the end of one of the long tables and she waited patiently as he retrieved whatever food was left.

In the end, they had a couple of rolls, some bone broth, and a plate of roasted vegetables that had been slightly burned. But in their exhaustion, they were happy to have any food to eat.

“You’re not angry with me.” Eve noted as she tore off a piece of a roll, dipping it in the broth before bringing it to her mouth.

“Why would I be?” Felix paused his eating to frown at her.

“Well…” Eve paused.

It struck her as odd how both Dimitri and Felix had reacted rather uncharacteristically to her use of her Crest. She expected Felix to be angry with her because Dimitri had been. But instead he didn’t seem much bothered by it.

He had been angry with her when they were fighting, smacking her hand away when she used her Crest on him. And she had expected for him to resume that anger once they got out of their battle.

“If you’re talking about using your Crest, the Professor told you to.” Felix said when Eve didn’t continue. “What else were you supposed to do?”

“I suppose you’re right.” Eve muttered, still in thought.

“I don’t like the way you use your Crest.” Felix grimaced at his food. “But it’s a strategic advantage that we’d be stupid to ignore on the battlefield.”

There was a pause as he took a rather aggressive bite out of his roll, eyes still fixed on the food before them rather than Eve’s face.

“Besides.” He said quietly with a small blush. “You promised you wouldn’t die.”

“And you believe me?” Eve asked with a hint of incredulity.

“Shouldn’t I?” Felix raised an eyebrow at her.

“It’s just I don’t exactly have the best record when it comes to telling the truth.” Eve explained. “I guess that says a lot about me that I’d be surprised someone trusts me.”

“You wouldn’t lie to me.” Felix said with an astonishing level of certainty, fiercely holding Eve’s gaze. “You’ve put yourself in difficult positions just to tell me the truth.”

“I adore you.” The words slipped out of Eve’s mouth before she could stop herself, surprising even her.

Felix blushed at that, returning his gaze to his vegetables. “Y-you too.”

“Hm?” Eve cocked her head to the side curiously.

“You too.” He said slightly louder, clearing his throat. “I, uh, adore…you.”

Eve couldn’t help the laugh that burst from her lips, clasping a hand over her mouth as soon as the sound escaped. Felix glared at her, unamused, as his face became increasingly flushed. They were both grateful, albeit for different reasons, that the dining hall was devoid of any life except for them and two cooks that were far too busy in the kitchen to pay them any mind.

“What’s so funny?” He asked, his features fluctuating between anger and embarrassment.

“Would you hate me if I said you looked cute when you said that?” Eve’s voice still held the lilt of laughter as she smiled at him.

“I wasn’t trying to be cute.” Felix grimaced. “But… I’ll allow it. Just this once.”

“How very generous of you.” Eve grinned, clearly enjoying herself.

“Whatever.” Felix clicked his tongue, though the corners of his mouth betrayed him as they pulled ever so slightly into a smile.

They both returned to their food in silence, simply enjoying each other’s company. Eve could feel the fetters of fatigue settling around her, but she was reluctant to forfeit this time with Felix. Right now, they had an excuse to be like this—alone together late at night. But who knew when next they would be able to have a moment like this. When could they truly sit together and speak freely and enjoy each other’s company?

However, Felix was also clearly feeling the effects of the battle they had just endured. It was late and they were battle worn and, though neither of them wanted to admit it, they were both in need of rest.

“Let me walk you to your quarters before you fall asleep sitting here.” Felix stood and grabbed Eve’s plates before she could protest.

He walked away to return their dirty dishes to the now empty kitchen and Eve watched him carefully. He truly did reminder her so much of his brother. Every step he made was intentional; every movement fluid and yet solid. Even at this age he truly had the makings of a wonderful knight. She knew he would hate to hear that, though. Felix’s feelings regarding knighthood and chivalry were a mystery to none.

It reminded her of when Glenn’s belongings came home. She had watched their family fall apart, stood by Rodrigue’s side as he said those words that buried the seed of resentment in Felix.

_“He died like a true knight.”_

Eve always knew it had been Rodrigue’s way of rationalising Glenn’s death to himself. He told himself, told her on many occasions, that Glenn had died an honourable death, that his life had not been snuffed out meaninglessly.

Rodrigue could continue to live with himself if he believed that Glenn had died like a knight rather than like a pig at the slaughter. But his words always made it seem as if he hadn’t truly cared all that much for Glenn.

It was why Eve always understood Felix’s resentment for his own father. He had idolised Glenn, cared about him much more than he had ever cared about anyone else.

“Eve.” Felix’s voice snapped Eve from her thoughts. “Ready?”

She nodded and stood, pushing in her chair quietly. She fully expected Felix to ask what was on her mind. After all, she wasn’t foolish enough to believe that her trip down memory lane hadn’t been evident on her face. But he said nothing as they left the dining hall and walked through the courtyard towards her room.

And in the darkness, lit only by the moon above them, Eve made a realisation. As he walked several paces before her, silent as ever, she realised she adored Felix for the simplicity of him.

That wasn’t to say he was simple, no. But being with him like this was. He didn’t ask questions, didn’t pry. Eve wasn’t sure if this was because he simply didn’t notice or because he respected her enough to not mention anything.

It was why being with Dimitri could be so tiring. Despite all her best efforts, the prince seemed impossibly adept at seeing through her. He would pick up on her slight inflections, the tiniest shift in her brow, and ask what was bothering her—desperate to help.

Sylvain at least had the courtesy not to say anything. But he wasn’t exactly cunning when it came to his attempts to cheer Eve up. Whenever her mind was preoccupied, Sylvain would suddenly have a new restaurant in town he wanted to try. She knew he at least wouldn’t ask, but it was embarrassing none the less to know just how much of herself she betrayed.

But it was never like that with Felix. He seemed to trust her, however earned or not, that she would tell him the truth of what was on her mind. Perhaps it was because he himself didn’t divulge his inner thoughts to others that often. But whatever the reason, Eve found herself enjoying that simplicity as they made the unfortunately short walk to her quarters.

“I guess, uh,” Felix looked away as they stood at her door, rubbing the back of his neck, “goodnight.”

“Thank you for having my back on the battlefield.” Eve said softly.

“Same goes for you.” Felix’s eyes flickered to hers, a small smile forming on his lips. “You’re one hell of a fighter. I like having you on my side.”

“Always with the fighting with you.” Eve exhaled in resignation, shaking her head though her lips curled up into a smile.

“Get some rest.” Felix said firmly. “You need it.”

“Same for you.” Eve smiled and nodded.

And though their conversation was done, neither made a move to leave. Felix stayed rooted to the spot, watching as Eve made no motion to open her door and step into her room.

Swiftly, Eve let her eyes scan around the surrounding area. When she was satisfied that there was not a single pair of prying eyes to be seen, she quickly leaned in to brush her lips against Felix’s.

“Goodnight, Felix.” She said once she had pulled back.

“G-goodnight.” Felix stuttered, looking away as he brought his closed fist up to his face in an attempt to hide the blush on his cheeks.

Sufficiently embarrassed, Felix walked away without looking back at Eve. And though he chastised his heart for how it hammered away in his chest, he couldn’t help the warmth he felt.

* * *

With Flayn rescued and now a member of the Blue Lions class, the rest of the Horsebow Moon passed rather peacefully. And though the thought of the Death Knight and the Flame Emperor loomed heavy on every mind, everyone also seemed rather happy to accept the momentary quiet.

Though no one was as grateful for the peacefulness as Eve. Thanks to the Professor telling Seteth she had been instrumental in Flayn’s rescue, Eve no longer had to contend with the Archbishop’s right-hand man breathing down her neck. He seemed to give her a begrudging distance as if to say he was thankful for her help, yet he still didn’t fully trust her.

Eve didn’t mind, though. She didn’t need Seteth to trust her, she just needed him to leave her alone.

There was another reason for Eve to enjoy the quiet that filled the remainder of the Horsebow Moon. Because everyone within the monastery walls was feeling safer than they had the previous months, it meant less knights patrolling Garreg Mach. There weren’t prying eyes around to see things and spread rumours.

And as such, Felix and Eve had been able to create tiny moments for themselves to be together. While Eve was still quite careful about who she was seen alone with, she allowed herself the luxury of kisses stolen in shadowed corners and words spoken softly over the clash of steel in the training grounds.

Despite herself, Eve found her heart growing fonder for Felix with each of their secret trysts. It was just so easy to be with him. They didn’t talk about Dimitri or what would happen come the Ethereal Moon. Felix didn’t ask questions when Eve got that far off look in her eyes that came with memories of the past; he didn’t pry about little things like when Eve’s fingers became increasingly bandaged.

For Felix’s part, the time they spent together that moon solidified his unwillingness to give Eve over to the boar. Too much did he enjoy clashing sword with her and revelling in her fighting spirit. In all that had happened, he had almost forgotten that the fire that ignited in her eyes when she fought was the whole reason he had been drawn to Eve.

This was not to mention that some small part of Felix relished the rebellion that came along with involving himself with Eve. She was promised to the boar, yet she chose him. And this was made even more satisfying by the fact that the boar prince had foolishly fallen in love with Eve.

However, the boar prince continued to be a thorn in Felix’s side. He constantly had to watch the two of them eat together, have tea together, walk around the monastery together. And ever since Ferdinand had joined their class, the Professor no longer had Dimitri acting as a cavalry unit. Now, he was always placed on the ground right next to Eve.

Felix had once asked Eve why she spent so much time with the boar. She explained that while it was now known their marriage was arranged, she still had to act as though it was something she wanted. Something about it reflecting badly on both the Church and the crown if she appeared to be coerced into this marriage.

“I have to go, Felix.” Eve said one weekend afternoon as they trained.

“I thought you had the whole day free.” Felix frowned.

Today there was the celebration of the founding of the Alliance, so everyone had been given the day off. The Professor didn’t even have them going out on a skirmish like she usually would have them do on a weekend.

“I have tea with Dimitri.” She offered a sympathetic smile as she wiped the sweat from her brow. “I need to wash up before I see him.”

“You’d think the boar has some kind of tea addiction with how often he asks for you.” Felix grimaced as they returned their training weapons to their rightful spots.

“Come now,” Eve placed a kiss on the tip of Felix’s nose, knowing full well they had the training grounds to themselves at the moment, “jealousy doesn’t look good on you.”

“Who’s jealous?” Felix growled, turning swiftly to push Eve into the pillar behind her—obscured from the view of the door should anyone come in.

“You tell me, Felix.” Eve smirked, quirking a challenging eyebrow up at him.

With a throaty snarl, Felix descended upon Eve’s lips fervently. His hands held her firmly in place, his fingers sinking into the flesh at her hips as his teeth pulled at her lower lip.

“Mmph. As much as I’d love to stay and talk,” Eve breathed as her tongue darted out to soothe her swollen lip, “I’ve really got to go.”

“Forget the boar and his tea.” Felix moved in again to capture Eve’s lips.

“You know I can’t do that, Felix.” Eve lightly chastised him as she brought her hand up to stop his advance, pressing two fingers to Felix’s eager lips. “A few of us from the class were going to have dinner with some of the Golden Deer tonight, will you join us?”

“Who’s ‘us’?” Felix pulled back though his hands stayed firmly on her hips.

“I think Ashe, Dedue, and Sylvain all said they’d join Dimitri and I.” Eve pursed her lips as she thought. “Annette and Mercedes already had plans, and I’m not sure what Ingrid’s doing. As for the Deer, I’m not sure who else Claude managed to rope in.”

“Yeah, whatever, I’ll be there.” Felix conceded.

It wasn’t like he particularly wanted to go, but he could already imagine how good of a time Eve would be having with them. Felix especially didn’t want to think about leaving her alone with both Claude and Sylvain.

“Good.” Eve placed a kiss on Felix’s forehead as she stepped out of his grasp. “I’ll see you then.”

She walked away briskly before Felix could have a chance to grab at her and delay her any longer. However, the ghost of his kiss lingered on her lips as she prepared her toiletries and a change of clothes to take with her to the baths.

Bathed and clothed and with her wounds redressed, Eve found her way to the courtyard. Her hair was still slightly wet, but she didn’t mind the coolness it provided in the warmth of the afternoon sun. The days were getting cooler, though—an ever-looming reminder of how quickly winter, and the Ethereal Moon, would be upon them.

“Eve.” Dimitri stood when he saw her approaching, walking around the table to pull her chair out for her.

“Sorry you had to wait for me.” Eve took her seat as she apologised. “It took me a little longer to get ready than I expected.”

“You have nothing to apologise for. I have only just got here myself.” Dimitri lied with a smile.

“What are these?” Eve asked as she glanced at the plate of sweets Dimitri had put out for them.

“Oh!” He exclaimed excitedly. “They’re from a new shop in the town that Annette told me about. It’s called ‘marzipan’. I’ve never heard of it myself, so I wanted to try it with you.”

“Marzipan…?” Eve repeated curiously, looking at the intricately shaped snacks. “Dimitri, these could not have been cheap.”

“Please, you needn’t worry yourself about that.” Dimitri shook his head with a smile.

He was clearly excited to share this new experience with Eve, but she couldn’t help but sigh at the prince’s eager smile.

“Dimitri, you don’t have to do all this for me.” Eve sighed with a small frown. “You’re always giving me so much more than I can return.”

She felt especially guilty remembering why she had been late to meet Dimitri.

“Is it not enough that I simply want to do these things for you?” Dimitri asked, his excitement wavering. “I ask for nothing in return, Eve.”

“You’re right, I’m sorry.” Eve looked away. She felt awful for dampening his good mood. “Thank you.”

“I was told these are made from almonds, so I went ahead and prepared us some almond tea as well.” Dimitri smiled, seemingly pleased at Eve’s acceptance.

Eve watched as he excitedly poured the tea for the both of them. She reckoned that Dimitri reminded her so much of the sun with his brightness and his optimism. It was just a shame that she preferred to live in the shadows.

“Eve, what happened to your hands?” Dimitri asked, voice dripping with concern, when she finally removed her hands from her lap to pick up her teacup.

“Oh, this?” Eve glanced at her hands, both of which were bandaged all the way up to the first knuckle of each of her fingers. “It’s nothing, really.”

“Are you training too much?” Dimitri’s brow furrowed. “Perhaps you should regrip your weapons if they’re callousing your hands that much.”

“No, it’s not that.” Eve shook her head, instantly kicking herself for telling the truth.

It would have been easier had she just let him believe whatever it was he thought had caused her injuries. But for some reason Eve’s first instinct with Dimitri was no longer to lie. Perhaps because too often he saw through those lies.

“No?” Dimitri crossed his arms in thought. “Then what happened? Perhaps you burned them during kitchen duty? But then surely Dedue would have told me as such since he had kitchen duty with you last.”

“If I tell you will you leave it be?” Eve interrupted his musing. “I don’t want to ruin these lovely sweets you’ve bought us by making you worry about me.”

“I suppose I can agree to that.” Dimitri nodded.

“I’m trying to get better at healing spells.” Eve admitted as she reached out to gingerly grab one of the marzipan creations Dimitri had laid out. “But it turns out I’m lousy when it comes to Faith magic.”

“Healing spells?” Dimitri echoed when Eve paused to take a bite of her sweet.

“These are delicious, Dimitri.” Eve’s eyes widened in surprise as the sugary taste coated her tongue.

Dimitri would have revelled in the excitement that glittered in Eve’s eyes, but he was too concerned with what she had just told him.

He decided to tuck away the memory of how she looked in that moment for later when he would no doubt find his mind occupied by her as it so often was. It was why he did these things for her; sought out new teas and sweets and trinkets in the markets to see the glimmer in her eye when she truly enjoyed what he brought her. All of this so that his daydreams could be of the happiness he caused her rather than the anguish or, even worse, the happiness caused by Felix.

“Eve, why are you practicing healing spells?” Dimitri frowned. “What about your Crest?”

“I always thought of myself as a healer.” Eve said, looking at her bandaged hands. “But I don’t make the pain go away I just make it go somewhere else.”

“It is not your responsibility to take pain away from others.” Dimitri placed his hand on the table between them, an invitation for her to reach back out to him that she never took.

“Isn’t it?” Eve asked, nibbling at her marzipan. “Why else do I have this Crest?”

Dimitri drew back his hand with a sigh, reaching back out only to grab one of the marzipan pieces. He bit into it as he watched Eve with sorrowful eyes. The sweetness of the treat sat in stark contrast to the oppressive air that had settled in around them.

“I’m sorry.” Eve pushed back in her seat to rest her elbows on her knees and drop her head into her hands. “I always do this don’t I?”

“What are you talking about?” Dimitri looked at her worriedly, only thinking of what he could do to right this wrong.

“You do these nice things for me and as thanks I just make things so depressing.” Eve laughed bitterly, lifting her head to look at Dimitri.

“Please, do not think like that.” Dimitri pleaded. “I am just happy that you trust me enough to be candid like this.”

“I want to do something nice for you, Dimitri.” Eve said suddenly. “Tell me your most selfish desire and I will see to it. I want to balance the scales even just a little bit.”

“My… most selfish desire?” Dimitri blushed at how suggestive the notion sounded.

“Anything.” Eve nodded. “You’re always so kind to me, it’s not fair that I take advantage of you like this.”

Dimitri knew that his true most selfish desire was absolutely out of the question. What he truly wanted was to know what her lips would taste like upon his. He wanted to envelop her in his arms and worship her mouth with his own. And, however shameful to admit, he wanted to embrace Eve and hear her say his name the way he had heard her say Sylvain’s many times before. His nobility would never allow him to admit this to anyone, but he was only a man and he had desires of his own.

“Let me heal your wounds.” Dimitri cleared his throat to speak when he realised he hadn’t yet answered Eve.

“What?” Eve’s brow furrowed.

“The Professor initially wanted me to aim to pass the Holy Knight class exam by the end of the academic year, so I have been training in Faith.” Dimitri explained. “I can show you how to heal your wounds and then you can practice with me.”

“I ask you for your most selfish desire and your answer is that you want me to let you do something for me?” Eve sighed, though a small smile formed on her lips.

“Because I know otherwise you would not let me tend to your wounds.” Dimitri answered, matter of fact.

“I suppose that is true.” Eve agreed. “Well, I promised to do anything, so I suppose I have no choice.”

“Come, then.” Dimitri stood from the table abruptly. “We can go to my quarters and practice before dinner.”

“Right now?” Eve asked, surprised.

“Why not?” Dimitri frowned.

“Right.” Eve nodded, standing from the table as well.

A promise was a promise, after all. And Eve’s guilt was increasingly weighing down on her. While Dimitri did everything in his power to make her happy, she went behind his back to have her secret trysts with Felix. And he was so kind, so optimistic through it all. Like the marzipan he bought her he was sweet on the tongue, but she had never really been one for sweets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a twitter now for my fic stuff! It's mostly me shitposting, but I'll have updates and stuff on there as well @vii_x_mmx


	31. Thirty

Dimitri walked several paces ahead of Eve as he led her to his quarters. Typically, he made an effort to walk beside her, equal. But right now, he couldn’t risk Eve being able to see his features with how clouded his mind was. Leading her to his room like this, alone, he couldn’t help but think of all the deplorable fantasies that had come to mind when she asked him for his most selfish desire.

Was he truly such a beast of a man that he couldn’t control himself? He had promised he would never touch Eve unless she asked it of him. And since he made that promise, the only contact they had had was when she initiated. But that didn’t mean he didn’t think of touching her.

He thought about her touch often, far more often than could ever be considered appropriate. Like some kind of disgusting pervert, his mind had neatly archived every instance of physical contact he had with her. And whenever he had an idle moment, it seemed these memories always came to the forefront.

His most sinful of these memories also happened to be the one he would think of most often. That night after Conand Tower when Eve had sung him to sleep with his head in her lap, he had woken hours later to see Eve sleeping as well. Her fingers were still tangled in his hair and he found his cheek was pressed against her bare inner thigh where her nightgown had ridden up.

What he should have done was remove himself and return to his own quarters. But instead, he had closed his eyes and breathed in her scent as he allowed himself to fall back asleep. He had known people would misunderstand if he was seen leaving her room the next morning, but perhaps a terrible part of him had wanted them to misunderstand.

_Disgusting_

_Perverted_

_How dare you think of her like that_

_She would never let you lay a finger on her_

His own thoughts mixed with the voices of the dead, admonishing him for his sinful desires. But just as he thought he might snap under the pressure, Eve’s gentle voice brought him back to reality.

“Are we… going to go in?” Eve was looking at him oddly, her head cocked to the side to look at Dimitri’s face.

They were standing in front of his door. How long had they been there? How long had he been lost in thought?

“Yes, apologies.” Dimitri cleared his throat, turning the knob and stepping in to hold the door open for Eve.

Casually, Eve strode into his room as if it were the most natural place for her to be. Dimitri watched as she clambered onto his bookshelf to sit atop it cross-legged. Before joining her, he took the chair that sat at his desk and used it to prop open the door.

The last thing he needed was Sylvain taking notice of him having Eve alone behind closed doors and mentioning it at dinner. He also couldn’t trust his own mind not to wander if they had too much privacy.

“Goodness, Eve.” Dimitri blinked in surprise as he watched her take the bandages off her hands. “I did not think it would be this bad.”

He sat next to her on his shelf with one leg dangling off the side and looked at her hands that were covered in wounds, his previous thoughts expelled just by the sight of them. There were all different types of cuts covering her palms and fingers. They were short, long, deep, shallow; some were already scabbed over while others were clearly fresh.

“Is it really that bad?” Eve frowned, looking at her hands with astonishing indifference.

“Yes!” Dimitri replied earnestly. “Eve, why would you make new cuts if you were not able to heal the previous ones?”

“I don’t know.” She shrugged. “I thought maybe it had to do with one type of cut being easier to heal than others.”

“Does it not hurt?” He looked at her with furrowed brows. How could she have such disregard for her own wellbeing?

“Sure it does.” Eve nodded, again with a small frown. “But I’ve had worse.”

“I struggle to understand you.” Dimitri shook his head solemnly. “For someone to care so deeply that others do not come to harm and yet have no regard for her own pain.”

“Well, show me how to heal them then.” Eve presented her hands to Dimitri with her palms out. “If you teach me well, I’ll have no reason to do this again.”

“Show me how you’ve been doing it first.” Dimitri said after a moment of thought. “Perhaps I might be able to pinpoint what you’ve been doing wrong.”

Eve nodded in agreement, dropping her left hand into her lap. She let her right hand hover over it, a white glow emanating from it as she cast Heal. Dimitri watched her closely, noting the indifference in her eyes as she regarded her wounded hands. And he watched further as a frustrated scowl curled her lips when nothing happened.

“I think I may know what is going awry.” Dimitri said once Eve gave up and returned her gaze to him.

“What is it?” Eve asked, leaning forward slightly.

Dimitri couldn’t help but smile at her eagerness. Eve truly did have a desire to take pain away from others. Perhaps it was why he was drawn to her—he hoped she would be the person who could take his pain away.

“Let me ask you this first,” Dimitri said, “have you only tried healing yourself?”

“Yes.” She nodded, speaking slowly as if she wasn’t sure where he was going with this.

“Think about the two best healers in our class: Linhardt and Mercedes.” Dimitri motioned to the side as if the two in question were standing right there. “What do they have in common?”

“Ponytail.” Eve answered rather simply without even a moment’s hesitation.

Dimitri couldn’t help the chuckle that rumbled in his chest as it turned into a full laugh. Even Eve snickered at her own answer, eyes crinkling into one of her rare genuine smiles.

“Besides that.” He grinned at her.

“Tell me.” She said with a light shake of her head.

“They both don’t want to see other people injured.” Dimitri explained. “Linhardt hates the sight of blood, so he has a very strong desire for people’s wounds to be gone. As for Mercedes, she’s a naturally caring person who doesn’t want to see others in pain.”

“What’s that got to do with my healing spells?” Eve pursed her lips in confusion.

“A healing spell is only ever as strong as the intention behind it.” Dimitri motioned towards her hands which she held out to him.

He let his hands hover over hers, one above and the other below. And as he cast Heal, he put into the spell his desire for Eve’s wounds to be gone. His feelings of love and his worry for her were all funnelled into his magic.

“The Professor told me that when she was tutoring me in Faith magic.” Dimitri watched as the cuts on Eve’s hands started to close. “When you’re casting healing magic, you have to think about wanting to see those wounds disappear.”

“I don’t get it.” Eve’s brow furrowed as she watched Dimitri work. She marvelled at the warmth that came from his hands. Even without him touching her, she could feel all of his compassion.

“If I’ve learned anything about you, Eve, it’s that you don’t care if you get hurt.” Dimitri momentarily looked up from their hands to meet her gaze. “You were willing to take on Professor Manuela’s stab wound just so that she wouldn’t have to be the one to bear it. So many times you’ve let your own well-being be secondary to that of others.”

“But what does that have to do with me not being able to cast Heal?” Eve asked.

“I don’t think you’re unable to cast Heal.” Dimitri shook his head. “I think you’re just unable to cast it on yourself.”

“What? Why?” Eve jerked back slightly in surprise.

“Like I said, a healing spell is only ever as good as the intentions behind it.” Dimitri reiterated. “You don’t really have any strong intentions to heal yourself because you don’t see your own wounds as a problem.”

“I suppose you’re right on that front.” Eve mused as Dimitri finally pulled his hands away from hers, revealing the fully healed flesh. “Wow, it’s like they were never there.”

“You have to care enough for the wound to go away.” Dimitri said as he reached for a letter opener that was sitting on his desk.

“What are you doing?” Eve cried out in shock when Dimitri removed his glove and sliced a thin cut into the centre of his palm with the instrument.

“I want you to try healing me.” He said, offering up his un-gloved hand. “Remember what I said. Think about your intention when you use the spell.”

He was sure he was right about why Eve was unable to heal her own wounds. But he was also worried that she may not be able to heal him either. Dimitri knew he was being presumptuous at best that Eve cared enough about him to be worried about his cut.

“Okay.” Despite his silent concerns, Eve took his hand unflinchingly.

She reached out with her left hand to support his own and pull it slightly closer to her. And with intense focus, Eve hovered her right hand over his open cut. He wondered what was on her mind as she cast Heal. Did she care for him? Was he someone whose pain she wanted to take away? And if that was the case, did he deserve it?

“It worked!” She looked up to meet Dimitri’s eyes with glittering excitement. “Look, it worked!”

She beamed with pride as she looked back down at his palm which was now smooth as if there had never been a cut there in the first place.

“Incredible, Eve.” Dimitri praised her as he put his glove back on. And despite his better judgement he asked, “what did you think of this time?”

“Oh.” Eve bit her lip, taking on a slightly embarrassed look. “I feel a bit foolish to say.”

“It is okay then,” Dimitri smiled, “you do not have to.”

“It was the marzipan.” She admitted suddenly, looking away sheepishly.

“Pardon?” Dimitri cocked his head curiously.

“I thought about how happy you looked to share the marzipan with me.” Eve continued to avoid his gaze though his eyes never left her face. “And I thought about how upset you looked when you saw my hands.”

“I see.” Dimitri nodded, begging his heart not to run wild with this piece of information. That plead, however, would go completely ignored as soon as Eve spoke her next words.

“I was thinking about how much more I preferred the way you looked with the marzipan.” Eve finally turned to look at Dimitri with a small smile. “Is that silly?”

“No, not at all.” Dimitri smiled with a shake of his head.

It was times like these when Eve said the most disarming things that he would feel himself falling deeper and deeper in love with her. He felt as though he had finally found the real Eve beneath her layers of protective charades.

She had been cold and stoic when first they met, relentlessly teasing him when she had him alone. But now he knew her to be passionate and caring with a mischievous streak. She spoke more freely with him now, though never about her past. And every day he felt he was awarded more and more of her genuine smiles and laughs.

“Dimitri.” Eve stood from her perch and whirled around to face the prince. “Can I ask you a favour?”

“Of course.” Dimitri nodded gravely.

“If you get injured during training or anything like that,” she leaned forward to bring her face closer to his, “can you let me heal you?”

“You… want to heal me?” Dimitri asked, blinking in surprise.

“Not that I hope you get injured.” She qualified, straightening up rapidly. “Just on the off chance that you do. So that I can practice my healing since it seems I can’t do it on myself.”

“I would be happy to help, then.” Dimitri nodded with a smile.

He couldn’t ever recall a time where Eve asked anyone for assistance, so he couldn’t help the pride and happiness that blossomed in his chest at her request.

“Hey lovebirds!” Sylvain suddenly appeared in the doorframe with a rather cross looking Felix beside him. “Ready for dinner with the Deer?”

“Is it already that late?” Eve turned to look at the two men in the doorway with mild surprise.

“I apologise, Eve, I did not intend to keep you that long.” Dimitri stood and smoothed his hands over the wrinkles that had formed in his uniform.

“No worries.” She shook her head with a smile. “Thanks to you I’m out of my healing rut.”

“Oh, did you finally get Heal down?” Sylvain’s eyebrows went up in inquiry.

“What?” Felix, on the other hand, was unaware of what they were talking about.

“Sylvain, you knew?” Dimitri frowned at his friend’s reaction.

“Uh, yeah?” Sylvain rubbed the back of his neck. “Who wouldn’t notice all those bandages and ask what was up?”

“What bandages?” Felix’s frown deepened with his confusion, though he was effectively ignored by the others.

“Sylvain, you knew and yet you did not tell her to stop?” Dimitri asked with a step forward, motioning back at Eve emphatically.

“Eve does what she wants.” Sylvain shrugged casually.

“Can someone please tell me what the hell you’re talking about?” Felix interjected angrily.

“Fe, buddy, did you really not notice all those bandages on Eve’s hands?” Sylvain turned to the boy beside him with a raised eyebrow.

“What, am I supposed to just stare at her hands all the time?” Felix asked defensively.

“Oh, I can imagine just where you were staring.” Sylvain’s teasing laugh was cut short when Felix punched him in the arm.

“I’m not you, pervert.” Felix grimaced, though a light blush on his cheeks betrayed him.

“We’re going to be late for dinner.” Eve interjected rather loudly before any more words could be traded. “Shall we go down to the dining hall?”

“Yes, I believe you are right.” Dimitri smiled at Eve apologetically. “Let us all go down together.”

Eve took the lead, pushing her way between Sylvain and Felix to walk out into the hall. The three men obediently followed her, Sylvain walking ahead to catch up with her brisk pace.

“So, His Highness helped you figure out what you were doing wrong?” Sylvain sidled up to her with an inquisitive smile.

“More or less.” Eve nodded. “I was able to heal him just fine.”

“Just him?” Sylvain frowned.

“I guess. He said I didn’t care enough about my own injuries for the spell to work on myself.” She tapped her chin in thought, remembering what Dimitri had explained to her about intention.

“So you care about him?” Sylvain looked at Eve cautiously from the corner of his eye.

“I always have.” Eve answered simply.

“But is it… y’know?” Sylvain watched her closely for her reaction but gleaned nothing from it.

“Sylvain, you know my answer to that is the same as it’s always been.” Eve sighed, turning her head to look up at him. “I’ve known them for three months.”

“It was worth asking.” Sylvain shrugged.

“Hey! Over here!” Claude spotted them as soon as they entered the dining hall, waving the four of them over to where everyone else was already seated.

“Sorry we’re late.” Eve smiled apologetically as they joined the group.

It was a lively bunch that had gathered, food spread on the table amongst them. Eve sat in the middle of one side, Dimitri and Dedue to her right and Claude and Hilda to her left. Directly across from her was Ashe flanked by Sylvain and Ignatz. Felix sat on the end of the table next to Sylvain, clearly not interested in socialising. And Raphael had been forced to sit on the end next to Ignatz by Claude so that he couldn’t hog all of the food before anyone had a chance to eat.

They ate and chatted and enjoyed each other’s presence. It was rare for those from different classes to eat together for a myriad of reasons. While it was true it was mostly because of the clique-like bond they formed in their individual classes, it was also because they had different schedules that often meant they wouldn’t eat at the same time anyways.

“You know,” Ignatz said when there was a lull in the conversation, “I don’t know if it’s my place to say, but I’m happy the future Queen of Faerghus is a commoner. Maybe it marks a change for the better in Fodlan.”

“I agree.” Claude nodded. “The Kingdom’s always been way too stuffy and traditionalist, no offense Your Princeliness.”

“None taken, Claude.” Dimitri laughed lightly.

“And I think you two make a lovely couple.” Ashe smiled shyly at Eve. “I know your marriage was arranged, but you two seem to really get along.”

“Ooh I agree!” Hilda piped up excitedly, leaning forward on her elbows to look down the table at Eve and Dimitri. “I see you two having tea in the courtyard _all_ the time and you both look so in love.”

Dimitri choked on his food, coughing and sputtering in shock at Hilda’s statement.

“I mean, Dimitri is always bringing these super rare and expensive sweets for Eve.” Hilda continued, oblivious to Dimitri’s reaction. “And she’s always so happy to try them even though I know for a _fact_ that Eve doesn’t like sweets.”

“Hilda!” Eve cried out.

She had been very careful not to let Dimitri know she didn’t like sweets. He was always so excited to bring them to her that she didn’t have the heart to tell him.

“You don’t like sweets?” Dimitri recovered from his coughing fit to ask Eve earnestly.

“I do like the things you bring me.” Eve comforted him quickly, shaking her head violently. “It’s just that too many sweets tend to make my stomach hurt.”

“I’ve _never_ seen Eve eat sweets unless they were given to her by Dimitri.” Hilda proclaimed.

“Eating sweets doesn’t mean you’re in love.” Felix grumbled from his end of the table.

“Now that I think about it, I remember some guys in town gave Eve some candies as a gift and she just gave them to Lysithea.” Sylvain mused. “She didn’t even try any of them.”

“Do you truly not like sweets?” Dimitri asked again, concern creasing his brow.

“It’s fine, Dimitri.” Eve placed a hand over his to reassure him. “You know I wouldn’t force myself to eat them if I really didn’t want to.”

“See what I mean?” Hilda looked to Claude for affirmation. “Totally a lovey-dovey couple.”

“You two really do suit each other, Your Highness.” Ashe piped up.

“So, tell me, Your Highnesses.” Claude grinned with a look that could only spell mischief. “Have either of you said those magic words yet?”

“What do you mean, Claude?” Dimitri asked, ever naïve.

“Oh, you know,” his grin widened, “ _I love you._ ”

Dimitri’s face immediately became a vibrant shade of scarlet, his blush travelling down his neck and up to the tips of his ears.

“I-!” Dimitri brought his hand up to his mouth, clearly embarrassed.

“Eve?” Claude looked at her out of the corner of his eye, his smirk never leaving his face. “You’re awfully quiet.”

“Claude, must you embarrass my fiancée like this?” Eve asked with a huff, feeling a little bad for Dimitri no matter how cute she found his flustered self to be.

“I mean, let’s all be honest.” Sylvain cut in with a manufactured laugh. “His Highness is clearly too shy to say anything like that. He’d probably be married to her for ten years and still blush if he tried to say it.”

Eve shot Sylvain an appreciative look. He knew very well that Dimitri had already proclaimed his love for Eve, but he wanted to save them both the embarrassment. Not to mention they had both noticed Felix quietly seething beside him.

“You’re right.” Claude laughed with a wink. “Sorry, Dimitri. Didn’t mean to put you on the spot like that.”

“It is alright, Claude.” Dimitri cleared his throat as he recovered. “I was simply taken off guard.”

“It’s not like they’re marrying for love anyway, so what does it matter?” Felix’s snide comment cut through the jovial atmosphere like a hot knife through butter, all eyes turning to him.

“Felix.” Eve said softly, warning.

“What?” He crossed his arms, defensive under the scrutiny of all those at the table. “Am I wrong?”

“Come on, Fe.” Sylvain smiled, patting his friend on the back. “We’re all just having a bit of fun.”

“You’re all just forcing your delusions onto her is what you’re doing.” Felix retorted motioning at Eve. “She’s clearly not in love with him.”

“Felix!” Eve repeated his name, harsher this time.

Cautious glances went around the table, eyes flickering between Eve and Dimitri and Felix. And though she kept a calm and level appearance, Eve was panicking on the inside. Felix absolutely could not expose their relationship right now—or ever for that matter. She didn’t fully trust that if pressed on the issue, Felix wouldn’t just tell the others how he felt about her.

Despite her true feelings, Eve still needed people to believe she and Dimitri were happy together. Perhaps not the madly in love couple they had pretended to be initially, but at least content to be with each other.

And so, as the tensions rose and the awkward atmosphere only worsened, Eve made an impossible decision. It was stupid and would put her in a lot more trouble with Dimitri and Felix, but it was the only way she could think of getting them all out of trouble publicly.

“I didn’t want it to be like this that I said it,” Eve blurted into the tense silence, already regretting what she was about to do, “but I am in love with Dimitri.”


	32. Thirty-One

Dimitri, mercifully, reacted in just the way Eve needed him to. He sputtered and blushed and tried but failed to meet her eyes. She knew that his rational mind would recognise what she was doing, but she was also painfully aware that the part of him that foolishly loved her would relish in hearing her say those words.

For her part, Eve acted bashful and a little defensive as if she hadn’t meant to blurt that out—as if it hadn’t been a calculated tactic. Sylvain, ever her partner in crime, played along, acting surprised that she hadn’t told even him that she loved Dimitri.

And, as if by the grace of the Goddess, Felix kept his mouth shut through the rest of the ordeal while the others at the table teased the couple.

Hilda was busy gloating that she had been right while Claude wouldn’t give the flustered Dimitri a break. Meanwhile, Eve dealt with the awkward apologies from Ashe and Ignatz who insisted they hadn’t meant to pry. Dedue and Raphael were the only two who hadn’t gotten involved, both sitting quietly at their respective ends of the table.

When the meal was over and they all went their separate ways, Eve didn’t even need to say a word to Sylvain, Felix, and Dimitri to get them to follow her out of the dining hall. She was angry, seething, in a way none of them had ever seen her.

They trailed dutifully behind her when she led them into Abyss, not daring to ask why when she told Yuri she needed to borrow the Ashen Wolves’ classroom.

“What the _fuck_ was that?” Eve finally spoke when they were alone with the doors closed behind them, her voice raised so much that it echoed around the room.

She whipped around to face the three men standing there in stunned silence. None of them had ever heard her curse or yell like that. Though Sylvain and Dimitri had no reason to believe she was angry with them specifically, her wrath at the moment didn’t seem to be too concerned with specifics.

“Were you _born_ a colossal idiot, or did you have to train to be this stupid?” Eve shouted at Felix.

Now it was apparent why she had taken them to Abyss. She could yell here in a way she couldn’t in any of their dormitory rooms. And in Abyss, she didn’t have to worry about nosy people caring what she was shouting about.

“Eve, I-!” Dimitri tried to interject.

“Do not.” She shot him a poisonous look, shutting up the prince instantly, before turning back to the object of her wrath. “Felix, do you care to explain to me what kind of mysterious rot took over your mind that would cause you to do that?”

“Everyone was pushing their delusions of love onto you.” Felix scowled, the only one not visibly petrified by Eve’s anger. “They all have these perceptions of you that aren’t true, and it made me angry.”

“Did you not stop to think for a second that I created those perceptions?” Eve snapped back at him, her harsh tone making him flinch. “And since when are you to decide how people perceive me?”

“They think you’re in love with the boar and you’re not!” Felix shouted back, motioning at Dimitri. “You should have seen the way he sat there, letting Hilda’s comments go to his head. He’s just as convinced as they are that you love him.”

“What does it matter to you what Dimitri thinks?” Eve threw her hands up in frustration.

“Kitten…” Sylvain tried to reach out for Eve, his voice soft in an attempt to calm her.

“Don’t you ‘kitten’ me right now, Sylvain.” She swatted his hand away and fixed her glare onto him. “I appreciate your help back there, but I am far too angry right now for you to try to calm me down.”

“It matters because the boar thinks you’re in love with him.” Felix answered Eve’s question, crossing his arms. “But you’re not. He should know that you’re in love with me.”

“What?” Dimitri’s eyes went wide, flickering between Felix and Eve.

He had known Eve cared for Felix, but did she truly love him?

“Woah, hey.” Sylvain looked at Eve questioningly, wondering if she had lied to him about her true feelings. Had she been concealing the fact that she actually was in love with Felix?

“What is he talking about, Eve?” Dimitri asked, swallowing the lump in his throat.

Why did he feel this way? He always knew that Eve had feelings for Felix. And he always knew that she did not return his own feelings of affection. But perhaps he truly had let Hilda’s comment go to his head—letting himself believe the delusion that she could love him deep down in her heart without knowing it.

“Any time you can’t find her, she’s with me.” Felix sneered at Dimitri. “You want to know what she was doing that made her late to tea today?”

“Felix, stop.” Eve’s voice was loud, commanding, drawing back the attention of her audience.

“He needs to know you’re not his.” Felix narrowed his eyes.

“And you need to know that I’m not _yours_ either.” Eve replied harshly. “Was that what all of this was for? Was it so important to you that Dimitri know your claim on my heart that you would ruin everything I’ve so carefully built? You forced my hand; made me add one more lie to my mountain of deception.”

“I’m tired of being second to the boar.” Felix retorted. “Why is it that he gets to have all of your time when I’m the one you care for.”

“You knew it would be like this, Felix.” Eve shook her head. “And yet you begged me to give you the remainder of my time. I promised you until the Ethereal Moon. But I have always made it clear to you that my duty comes first—regardless of whatever I may feel.”

“It shouldn’t be like that, though!” Felix shouted back. “You’re always putting yourself second. Just be selfish for once damn it!”

“Do you have any idea what’s happened when I’ve been selfish?” Eve’s voice took on a shrill quality. It was the first time Dimitri or Felix had ever seen her lose her composure like this. “My selfishness killed--!”

“Eve!” Sylvain’s voice boomed as he called out her name in panic, cutting her off.

Even Eve startled at the sound of her name, especially from Sylvain. It didn’t go unnoticed by Felix or Dimitri either that he didn’t use his pet name for her in this instance.

“You’re upset.” He lowered his voice and spoke gently now. “Let’s not keep yelling and saying things we don’t mean to say.”

He gave her a pointed look, one that meant to tell her to stop before she revealed too much to Felix and Dimitri. In her anger, she had lost control. Eve wasn’t sure what had come over her, why she had lost her composure in this way.

Perhaps it was because the lie she had been forced to tell hurt both Felix and Dimitri in a way she hadn’t ever desired to. She knew Dimitri’s imagination would run wild from hearing her voice say that she loved him, whether or not he knew it to be false. And she knew that in the same regard, Felix wouldn’t be able to forget her saying those words—especially when she had never said them to him.

It was the perfect storm that put all of them between a rock and a hard place. And Eve was angry because it could have been avoided. Had Felix not been unable to control his jealousy, had she not invited him to dinner, had she not accepted his proposal, had she not succumbed to her selfish crush. There were so many things she should have done to prevent this from happening.

“I am going to say what I need to say.” Eve said, closing her eyes as she tried to level her breathing. “You are going to listen and then you are going to leave. Am I clear?”

“Of course.” Dimitri nodded.

“Whatever.” Felix grimaced and looked away.

“Are you sure, kitten?” Sylvain looked at her with concern in his eyes.

“I need to clear the air.” Eve said. “And then you will all leave me alone before I decide to change my mind about letting what happened tonight go.”

She took a deep breath, trying to calm herself so that she didn’t lose her head again. While it had been oddly therapeutic to let go of herself like that, she had nearly said too much. If Sylvain hadn’t been there, she would have been done for.

“Dimitri,” Eve looked directly at the prince, “I need you to know that I do not love you. I am sorry. I know we’ve discussed this before and it’s cruel of me to reiterate it like this, but I know how the heart can run away without the mind. I don’t want you misunderstanding anything.”

“I understand.” Dimitri nodded; composure written on his face though his eyes were sorrowful.

“I have indeed been meeting with Felix in secret.” Eve continued. “I have promised him the rest of my time before we are wed. And I apologise, but I have no intention to stop meeting with him until the day of our wedding arrives.”

She now turned to address Felix with a blank face. It was frightening to all of them the way she had simply turned her emotions off after such an explosive outburst. But it was also painful to see how adept she was at burying her own feelings.

“That being said.” Eve began again. “Felix, you have to understand that I don’t love you either. I cannot allow myself to be in love. I do have feelings for you, but I will not allow myself to discern if those feelings are love or not. And no matter what, I will still marry Dimitri come the Ethereal moon.”

Felix seemed to grapple with a series of emotions as she spoke, but he remained silent. He realised that he would rather accept this secondary role in her life rather than be cut out completely. And for as long as she allowed him to be in her life, he still had a chance to convince her to be with him.

“Felix, I’m very angry with you for what you’ve done tonight.” Eve added. “And the next time you want to take your jealousy out on me when you see me with Dimitri, remember that you are in a hell of your own creation. You did this to yourself.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong!” Felix cried out in frustration. “So what if people see you don’t love him? Maybe then you wouldn’t have to marry him.”

“So what?” Eve felt the anger bubbling back up in her throat. “So people see that a mere child defied not just the Archbishop, but the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus and the Church of Seiros too. So people like Lonato and the Western Church feel emboldened to turn their blades towards the Church.”

“That’s not your burden to carry.” Felix argued.

“It is, though. Don’t you see that?” Eve’s brow creased as she regarded the boy before her. “Goddess, you’re just like Glenn!”

She remembered her frustration when Glenn hadn’t understood the weight she carried, why she did what she did. It had been the first thing they truly fought about. Although, just like now, it hadn’t deterred her from what she felt for him. The truth was, having someone who didn’t understand—someone who would urge her to act for herself at times— was refreshing.

“Predictable.” Felix clicked his tongue. “Bringing up Glenn as soon as I start to press you on something.”

“Felix.” Sylvain said, his voice unusually grave as he placed a firm hand on his friend’s shoulder. “I think you’ve done enough damage tonight.”

“But I—” Felix started to object but stopped when Sylvain just shook his head at him silently.

“Goodnight, Eve.” Dimitri, who had been silent up until now, finally piped up as he bowed politely. “I do apologise for putting you in such a harrowing situation.”

His politeness, paired with his suddenly stilted language, made Eve’s heart hurt. He was in pain, injured by the constant reiteration that she did not return his affections. And here he had had to watch her spat with Felix—no doubt wondering why she would choose someone who irritated her so over someone who gave everything for her to be happy.

“Let’s get you out of here before you make things worse.” Sylvain said to Felix, hand still tightly clasped on his shoulder as he all but dragged the Fraldarius heir out of Abyss.

Eve watched on in silence as they left, only relaxing with a sigh once they were out of sight. She was tired, exhausted from expressing her emotions so outwardly. In her current state, with her mind abuzz, she couldn’t fathom going back to her quarters to be alone with her thoughts.

“I need a drink.” She sighed to herself, running a hand through her hair as she decided to stay a little longer and find out just how terrible the ale down in Abyss was.

* * *

“You really gave your band of idiots a tongue lashing earlier didn’t you, little lady?”

Yuri bent down to pick up Eve’s shirt from where it had been discarded on the floor of the Ashen Wolves’ classroom, straightening to hand it to her.

“I can’t remember the last time I lost my head like that.” Eve gratefully accepted the garment, slipping her arms into it casually though she made no move to button it up.

She watched as Yuri set to work on his own shirt, buttoning it up at a leisurely pace. Her eyes trailed up his torso, taking in the scars that told of his storied past. And she couldn’t help when her eyes flickered down to her own bare stomach to see the scars that marred the skin there. She wondered if Yuri remembered how he got each of his scars the way she remembered each of hers.

“Well, I’m not complaining.” Yuri smirked at Eve when he was finished with his shirt. “Their misfortune became my entertainment for the evening—in more ways than one.”

He said the last part with a wink, raising his eyebrows suggestively as his eyes did a sweep over her still mostly bare body.

“I just needed to let off some steam.” She sighed, running a hand through her hair and picking up her cup of ale that she had left on the side. “This stuff truly is horrid down here.”

“We make do.” Yuri replied nonchalantly, tossing Eve’s trousers to her which she caught in one hand. “And the next time you want to blow off steam, let me know. You’re fun when you’re angry.”

“I’m not making a habit out of this, Yuri.” Eve rolled her eyes as she finally made a move to get redressed, hopping down from her perch atop one of the desks to pull her trousers on.

“That’s a shame.” Yuri tutted with a smirk. “We have fun, don’t we?”

“It wouldn’t be nearly as fun if we did this all the time now would it?” Eve raised an eyebrow at him.

“I suppose you’re right.” Yuri let out a hearty laugh. “Though, I don’t get why you don’t just sleep with that Fraldarius boy. You’re clearly involved.”

“I’d appreciate if you kept that to yourself.” Eve sighed. “Anyways, he’s too young.”

“Too young?” Yuri asked, amused. “He’s not much younger than you or I.”

“He’s not of age yet.” Eve shook her head. “He’s still just a boy.”

“Never suspected you to be the kind of person to care about that.” Yuri shrugged. “Though, I don’t know that I know much of anything about you.”

He frowned at her as he spoke, crossing his arms and watching her tuck her now buttoned shirt into her trousers. Eve picked up that this seemed to bother Yuri, the fact that he didn’t know much about her. He was the type of person who liked to hold all the cards, and she figured it irritated him to no end to not know the truth about her.

“You’re different than you used to be.” He said after a while.

“Oh?” Eve raised an eyebrow at him, returning to the desk she had been sitting on and taking a sip of her ale. “How so?”

“It was just over a year ago and yet you’re like a different person now.” Yuri remarked. “You were so…how should I put it? Cold? Aloof?”

“Oh, you’ll make me blush.” Eve chuckled sarcastically.

“I couldn’t get a read on you because you were so closed off.” Yuri shook his head lightly. “But now I can’t get a read on you because you’re so erratic.”

“Erratic?” Eve’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. Though, she realised that was certainly a fair examination of her recent behaviour.

“You’re all over the place; it’s like you can’t decide what version of yourself you actually are.” Yuri gestured vaguely as he spoke.

“What version…?” Eve trailed off in thought.

She hadn’t really considered it, but she could see how accurate Yuri’s assessment was. Eve had lived so many lives, been so many things for so many people. She was constantly putting on a front that now that she thought about it, she wasn’t sure who she was.

Was she the silent Fraldarius servant who loyally served her house, unseen by anyone but her Lord? Or was she the person Yuri had met in Abyss that time, cold and sly seeking out only physical pleasures. Or perhaps she was the version of herself who saw the pain in Dimitri and Felix and wanted to help them, heal them.

Maybe she was none of these things, though. Maybe she wasn’t nearly as selfless as she would like to think she was. She wasn’t helping people out of the goodness of her heart, she did it because she felt guilty. Fixing Dimitri, taking away Felix’s pain—she wanted to do these things to make herself feel better.

“I suppose it doesn’t matter, though.” Eve said finally. “In the end, the version of myself that I will have to be is the version that’s a good wife to the King of Faerghus.”

“Why don’t you just do what you want?” Yuri asked. “I know how much you hate Rhea. And it seems like even your three idiots want you to decide things for yourself.”

“I’m certain you already know the answer to that.” Eve looked at Yuri intensely. “My ‘idiots’, as you call them… they might not see it. But you do. I know you do. You see it down here in Abyss—the unrest. Fodlan is cracking at the seams. Something is coming.”

“And you think you’ll be the one to save us all from that by marrying the little prince?” Yuri smirked rather cruelly.

“I like to think I’m not that narcissistic.” Eve huffed with a half-smile. “No, I think that I can do my part not to exacerbate the situation by marrying Dimitri. I think whatever’s coming has been in motion for quite some time now. There’s no stopping it. But I at least don’t want to contribute.”

“How noble.” Yuri laughed. “And tell me, when whatever is coming does finally happen, who will you stand by?”

“Who will I stand by?” Eve echoed.

“I’m just curious to see who you’ll choose to protect in the end—your fiancée or your little Fraldarius.”


	33. Thirty-Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Content Warning*
> 
> This chapter contains elements of self harm. If this is something that can be triggering for you, please either skip this chapter or read with caution. Please practice self care reading this if you know self harm to be something you're sensitive to.
> 
> I will place a warning at the beginning of the section if you would like to read and skip over that part.

It wasn’t until three days later, on the first night of the Wyvern Moon, that Eve spoke to Felix again. She had been actively avoiding him again, and she could tell it was upsetting him. But it wasn’t his usual irritation or anger that showed. Instead, she had more than once caught him looking at her with a heart wrenching loneliness in his eyes.

But she still needed time to collect herself after what happened at their dinner with the Golden Deer. She had been truly angry with Felix over something that honestly shouldn’t have bothered her that much. And so she took those three days to figure out where her head was at.

“Felix?”

She came to his door in the middle of the night, well after everyone else was asleep, knocking softly as she whispered his name.

She was surprised when there was an immediate response on the other side of the door, a rustling of sheets thrown aside and the creak of shifting weight. Soon after, Felix was opening the door to squint at her in the darkness of the passage.

“Eve?” He muttered, voice hoarse after having just woken up.

“Can I come in?” She asked in a whisper as she cocked her head to the side.

“Yeah, whatever.” Felix was still clearly fighting off sleep, but he stepped back to let her inside his quarters.

She walked over to his desk where she knew he would have a candle, igniting it with magic to cast a soft glow around the room. Behind her she heard Felix’s bed creak once more as he plopped down to sit on the edge, watching her closely.

Eve couldn’t help but marvel at him when she turned to look at Felix. She almost chuckled to herself at how very ‘Felix’ his bedclothes were—a loose undershirt and linen pants. She imagined he dressed that way to always be prepared to jump into battle, never caught off guard.

She was also mesmerised by how handsome he looked with his hair down, his raven locks cascading over his shoulders. The only other time she had seen him with his hair not in his signature bun was when he was in the infirmary after their mission in the Holy Mausoleum. It seemed like so long ago now.

“I’m sorry.” Eve said finally, remembering why she had come to see Felix.

She walked several paces over until she was standing directly in front of Felix. Eve then sank to her knees, sitting back on her legs to look up at Felix.

“I was absolutely horrid to you the other night.” She reached out to grab his hands that were in his lap. “I’ve no excuse. But I needed you to know that I’m sorry.”

Felix still didn’t say anything, though even with her head bowed Eve could feel his eyes on her.

“I like you, Felix— a lot.” Eve admitted. “And I’ve been acting so erratic because I’m afraid of those feelings; of how quickly I’ve come to feel this way about you.”

“…I should be the one apologising.” Felix said after a moment of silence. “I just can’t control myself when it comes to you. And it makes me so angry thinking about how much of a fool I make myself out to be whenever I’m around you.”

“You’re not a fool.” Eve finally lifted her head to look at him, shaking it slightly. “I… I actually find your jealousy somewhat endearing.”

“Well, I don’t think anyone found me endearing at dinner the other night.” Felix blushed at the earnest look in Eve’s eyes. It felt so foreign to him to be regarded with such gentleness and adoration.

He was painfully aware of how abrasive he could be when it came to others. Outside of Sylvain and Ingrid, he wasn’t really friends with anyone else in their class. Ashe had tried to be friendly, likening Felix to one of his favourite book characters, but Felix had simply berated him. And while he had tried to be nice to Annette by asking her about her songs, she ended up saying he was evil for some reason.

Felix was sure he didn’t treat Eve much different from any of his other peers, he wasn’t sure he could have. In every interaction he had, he was simply being himself and others interpreted that however they wanted.

“Felix.” Eve said his name gently, snapping him back from his thoughts. “I’m sorry it’s like this. I wish I met you in another lifetime.”

“Can I ask you something?” Felix reached out to hold her face in his hand.

He ignored the fact that she seemed genuine about her remark about another lifetime. Felix didn’t believe in any afterlife or ghosts—once you were dead, that was it. But Eve seemed almost certain that she would have another life after this one.

“Anything.” She pressed her cheek further into his touch, eyes locked onto his.

“Why did you eat the sweets?” Felix was embarrassed by his own question, but it was too late to take it back.

“The sweets?” Eve’s brow furrowed in confusion. “You mean the ones Dimitri brings me?”

“You don’t do things without a purpose.” Felix willed himself not to react to that name coming from her mouth. “There’s always a reason for what you’re doing, so I want to know why it is you try so hard to please the boar.”

“He’s been through enough.” Eve began with a sigh, bringing her own hand up to place over the one Felix had holding her cheek. “You and I both know that. And even though I don’t love him, I still want him to be happy.”

“It’s always the same for you, isn’t it?” Felix shook his head. “Putting your wants second to those of others. Though I suppose eating sweets to make the boar happy is better than taking on a near fatal stab wound to save Professor Manuela.”

“That’s why I wanted to learn Heal.” Eve responded. “I took what you said when we rescued Flayn to heart. I wanted to stop transferring pain and start healing it.”

Felix sighed, bringing his other hand up to cup Eve’s other cheek as he brought his head down to rest his forehead against hers.

“I want to tell you to care only about yourself, but I know you won’t listen.” He muttered under his breath.

“Can’t it be enough that I care about you?” She asked in return.

“For now I guess.” Felix replied, pulling away to look into her eyes.

Without another word, Eve stood up from the floor and knelt on the bed next to Felix. He watched her questioningly until she wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in the crook of his neck.

“You’ve looked so sad these past few days.” She said into the space above his clavicle, her breath hot on his skin. “I couldn’t stand it.”

After a moment of hesitation, Felix brought his arms around Eve to reciprocate her embrace. She was warm and Felix relished the way that she seemed to fit so perfectly against him.

“I have to go soon.” She admitted sadly. “But I want to stay like this just a little longer.”

“Stay as long as you like.” Felix whispered.

As he spoke, Felix strengthened his grip on Eve to halfway lift her and shift her body until she was sitting in his lap, legs straddling either side of his hips. She seemed startled by the movement but didn’t protest, settling further into his embrace once he had finished shifting their position.

“Felix.” His name left her lips in a breathy sigh as he kissed along her neck.

He continued to trail kisses along her neck, her jaw, her bare clavicle. He peppered kisses over the scar that she had gotten because of him. No longer did the scar make him angry, instead it now acted as proof of her feelings for him.

Eve sighed his name again as his lips travelled further until he was kissing the top of her left breast just at the seam of her nightgown. His hands became just as adventurous as his lips, dragging up her bare thighs and hiking up the light fabric of her bedclothes as he did so. His fingers sank into her hips as he pulled her body closer to his, grinding his own hips up to meet hers.

“Felix.” Her voice was still breathy but now had a warning tone to it.

“I want you.” His own voice came out as an almost guttural growl as he pulled back from his assault of kisses to look into Eve’s eyes.

“I know you do.” She sighed, placing her hands on his shoulders to hold him back.

“But our ages.” Felix resigned, retracting his hands from underneath her nightgown and pulling the hem down to cover her exposed thighs.

“Thank you for respecting that.” Eve leaned forward and placed a soft kiss on Felix’s lips.

“I won’t force you. Ever.” He said as he returned her kiss.

“I know.” Eve kissed him again, caressing his cheek with her thumb.

She pulled back and ran a hand through his hair, relishing how silky his locks felt in between her fingers.

“You should go.” Felix whispered, burying his face into her neck.

“You say that, but you tighten your arms.” Eve laughed lightly, ruffling Felix’s hair.

Gently, Eve removed herself from Felix’s grasp and stood up from his lap. She held onto his hands, though, as she stood, smiling softly.

“What’s that look for?” Felix frowned.

“I just… I like this.” Eve’s smile faltered as if she were suddenly troubled by something. “I wish we could have more moments like this.”

“Me too.” Felix sighed squeezing her hands lightly. “Now get out of here before I make a fool of myself and ask you to stay.”

Eve nodded with another smile, reluctantly pulling her hands away before swooping in for one last kiss.

“Goodnight.” She murmured.

“Goodnight.” Felix nodded as she opened his door silently.

***content warning for the remainder of the chapter***

Eve stepped into the hallway after giving a cursory glance out to make sure no one else was around. As she closed the door behind her and made to leave for the stairs, she paused at an odd sound.

She turned around, eyes looking around in the darkness as she pricked up her ears. After nearly dismissing it, she heard the sound again. It was a grunt, quiet and muffled, but distinct now that she was listening for it.

Eve stepped towards the end of the hall; there were only two rooms the sound could have come from but she wasn’t sure which one it was until she heard it again, clearer this time.

“Sylvain?” She pressed herself up against his door, listening for any movement on the other side.

She heard a sharp intake of a breath that was then held as if he didn’t want to be heard.

“Sylvain, it’s Eve.” She whispered into the crack between the door and its frame. “Are you okay in there?”

There was still nothing on the other side. Eve was sure she had heard something like an almost pained grunt.

“Sylvain, I’m coming in.” She said, a little louder this time, as she moved to open the door.

“Don’t!” He shouted, panicked, before lowering his voice. “Please. I’m fine.”

“Sylvain, you don’t sound fine.” Eve said, wishing she could see his face to discern what he was thinking.

“Why do you keep repeating my name like that?” He asked. There was almost a tone of anger to his voice that Eve had never heard.

“I-I don’t know. I’m just worried.” Eve hadn’t even noticed she was doing it until Sylvain pointed it out.

“I thought we agreed not to worry about each other.” Sylvain said from his side of the door.

Eve didn’t answer, instead biting at her lip anxiously. Clearly, Sylvain was hiding something. She knew he was still battling with how he felt about what happened with Miklan. She also knew that she should have talked to him about it.

But their agreement was that they were each other’s escape from their issued. She never pressed him when they got back from their mission. She didn’t question when he gave the Lance of Ruin to the Professor.

She should have been there for him, but she wasn’t.

“Sylvain, please just let me in so I can talk to you.” She pleaded softly, a little concerned that his earlier should may have woken someone.

“Just go to bed, Eve.” Sylvain replied. “You shouldn’t even be up here.”

Out of options, Eve did the only thing she could think of to confirm her suspicion. There was only one reason she could think that he wouldn’t want to let her in right then. It was something he used to do when he was younger, something he had hidden very well but not well enough.

As she activated her Crest’s power, Eve watched several cuts manifest on her forearms. She blinked back tears as blood beaded up from the wounds and began to form small streams running down her arms.

“Eve!” Sylvain wrenched his door open as he called out her name, looking in horror at her arms. “Put them back. I swear to the Goddess, Eve, put those back.”

“Sylvain.” Her voice wavered, filled with emotion. “I thought you stopped.”

Roughly, he grabbed her upper arm—careful not to grab anywhere that could hurt her—and dragged her into his room.

“Kitten, please.” Sylvain begged once he closed the door behind him. “Can you put those back? I don’t need to feel any worse than I already do.”

“Sylvain, I…” Eve reached out for him, stopping when he flinched at the movement. “When I came to the Academy and saw how you wore your uniform, I was relieved. I remembered when you were younger what you used to do to yourself.”

She looked away from Sylvain and her eyes fell on the small dagger that had been tossed aside on the floor, blood still on the blade.

“You would self-deprecate, hide away your talents—anything to have one less thing for Miklan to hurt you for.” Eve swallowed thickly. “And then you started hurting yourself, thinking you deserved it. I recognised the signs when I would see you because I used to be that person too. So I was so happy when I came here and I saw your arms because I thought you had gotten better.”

“I just learned how to use healing magic.” Sylvain mumbled. “I didn’t stop, I just got better at hiding it.”

“I’m so sorry, Sylvain.” Eve stepped forward to grab one of his hands.

“Can you at least let me heal you?” Sylvain asked quietly to which Eve nodded.

He appeared to Eve so much like a child. It was as if he had shrunk despite the fact that he still stood taller than her. He looked so small, afraid, nothing like the self-assured person he pretended to be.

She watched him closely as he healed her, watched the pain on his face. Eve wished there was something she could do for him, some way to take away his pain. She could learn all the healing spells she wanted to, but there was no magic that could take away Sylvain’s childhood.

“I’m sorry, Sylvain.” Eve repeated her apology once he was finished healing her. “Goddess, I’m so useless. I knew all this time and I did nothing. I saw what Miklan did to you, saw how your own father treated you like nothing more than a stud horse. And all I did was stand and watch because I was afraid of being known.”

“It’s not your fault, kitten.” Sylvain sighed. “What could you have even done? You were a servant. If you reprimanded Miklan, he would have only taken it out on me. And if you went to my father, there’s no way he would have listened to you.”

“Maybe then.” Eve shook her head. “But I knew you were struggling. I knew you were upset about Miklan and the lance and everything that happened in Conand Tower. But I went on holding to our stupid agreement about not asking. You were my escape when I needed one, so I wanted to be yours. But I should have said something. I should have noticed.”

“You can’t put that on yourself, kitten.” Sylvain said as he leaned forward to rest his head on her shoulder. “And I don’t want you to.”

She stood there in silence, bringing up a hand to rest on Sylvain’s head. She knew the sadness in his heart, it wasn’t the kind that went away with time. He needed help, but Eve had no idea if she was qualified to be the person to help him.

“You said you recognised the signs because you used to be that person.” Sylvain said after some time.

“Yes.” Eve nodded.

“When does it go away?” He asked and Eve felt her heart break.

She had never seen Sylvain be vulnerable like this despite the many times she had allowed herself to be vulnerable with him.

“I can’t tell you that.” Eve admitted, wishing she had a better answer for him.

“Out of everyone,” Sylvain said as he straightened to look at her, “I didn’t want you to know the most.”

“Why not?” Eve asked.

“Because I like how you treat me.” Sylvain answered with a hint of remorse. “You don’t think I’m just some scumbag skirt chaser like the others. But you also don’t look at me like I’m some pitiful result of my circumstances.”

“Sylvain, that won’t stop.” Eve shook her head. “I know that you’re more than your pain and you’re more than your defence mechanisms. It’s true, I worry about you. But that’s because you’re my friend.”

“Friend, huh?” Sylvain looked away almost guiltily. “The truth is, this is the first time in a while.”

“Sorry?” Eve frowned in confusion.

“I said I never stopped, that I just got better at hiding it.” Sylvain explained. “I said that because I didn’t want to admit that I had stopped. Because it makes me feel so much weaker that I would relapse like this.”

“Sylvain, what you’re doing doesn’t make you weak.” Eve couldn’t help the concern written on her face. “It’s not a matter of weakness or strength. And it doesn’t just go away. Sometimes those demons come back to haunt you, and sometimes they win. But that doesn’t make you any weaker or stronger.”

“It’s been years since I last did this.” Sylvain’s voice cracked with emotion. “But having to…kill Miklan; it brought back all those memories. Every night when I closed my eyes, I remembered all the things he did to me when we were younger. And then I remember how he said this was my fault at Conand Tower. As if it were my fault for being born.”

“Did it make you feel better?” Eve asked quietly.

“What?” Sylvain’s brow furrowed.

“Did hurting yourself make you feel better?” She asked again.

“…no.” Sylvain swallowed. “But it made me feel in control. Like this was one aspect of my life that I had any say in.”

“Then let’s find something else you can control.” Eve said firmly.

“What do you mean?” Sylvain frowned.

“I can’t… I mean.” Eve huffed as she tried to articulate what it was she was trying to say. “As much as I wish I were able to just… make your pain go away, I know that’s not possible. Not like with physical wounds. And I know something like this isn’t that simple. But if you’re doing this because you need control in your life, th-then maybe if there’s something else you can control you won’t feel the need…”

Eve could feel herself vomiting words, but she couldn’t stop. Ever since she came to the Officers Academy, she was constantly being reminded that despite what she had previously thought about herself and her Crest, she was not a healer. She couldn’t rid the world of pain—physical or otherwise. She saw it in Dimitri, Felix, Sylvain. There was nothing she could do for them.

“Thank you.” Sylvain said, suddenly enveloping Eve in a tight hug.

“Sy-Sylvain?” Tentatively hugging him back after hesitating.

“No one’s cared enough to notice.” Sylvain mumbled into her hair. “Or at least if they did, no one cared enough to say anything. So, thank you for caring.”

“Don’t make me sound so noble.” Eve shook her head as much as she could in their tight embrace. “I can’t make this go away, Sylvain. I can’t help you.”

“I don’t need you to make it go away, kitten.” Sylvain sighed as he pulled back to look at her. “You’ve taken on enough. Stop trying to fix everyone.”

“Please.” Eve shook her head. “Please let me do this.”

_Please let me save at least one person. Maybe then the voices of all those I couldn’t, didn’t, save will be appeased._


	34. Thirty-Three

The Wyvern Moon came and went with a swiftness that Eve hadn’t anticipated. The days had all blurred by; seminars on battalion leadership, weekend skirmishes at Lake Teutates, a birthday celebration for Ashe. Everything seemed to happen all at once.

And among it all, Eve had somehow fallen into a comfortable rhythm. She spent her early mornings before class training with Felix when no one else was up yet. When classes were over for the morning, she had lunch with the rest of the Blue Lions before their afternoon training. During class, she was always with Dimitri—glued to his side after her public proclamation of love.

Evenings became Eve’s only variable in her days. Sometimes she would join Sylvain in town for a meal while other times she would fish or read or train. But her favourite night-time activity that she had started to indulge in that moon was to steal away on a Wyvern to stargaze from the roof of the cathedral.

On occasion, Claude would join her up there. The two of them had grown closer after the first time he found her up on the roof. And though she didn’t tell him as much of the truth as Sylvain knew, the two of them did divulge in marginally more honesty with each other than they did the rest of the students at the academy.

Eve found herself almost happy despite her circumstances. She had found friends in Ashe and Sylvain and Claude; she had found a way to balance her public life with Dimitri and her private one with Felix.

And yet here she was, hiding away from the revelries that were happening inside the dining hall.

The Blue Lions had won the Battle of the Eagle and Lion with sweeping victory. Thanks to Byleth’s leadership, they had been able to make quick work of both the Golden Deer and the Black Eagles. And now, in a rare moment of unity, the three classes were all enjoying a feast in the dining hall.

But Eve had no desire to join the party. She didn’t want to have to stand next to Dimitri and be his shadow throughout the feast. Not only did she not have the energy to do so, but she also felt like her presence was always holding Dimitri back.

When she was with him, Dimitri was acutely attentive of her. He made an effort to include her in any conversation he was having, to speak to her more than anyone else. But she wanted him to become closer to his peers rather than focus on her. More than anything, Eve wanted Dimitri to have his youth—something he couldn’t do if he was always fussing over her.

There was something else that was also weighing on Eve’s mind that made her unwilling to join the festivities. Lately, she had been re-evaluating her relationship with Rhea and everything that kept her here in Fodlan.

She remembered when she had first met Rhea, though the two of them had both gone by different names back then. Eve had been so hopeful about the person her mother had told her so much about. When she had first come to Fodlan, she hadn’t met Rhea but only hear stories about a benevolent figure akin to the Goddess herself. But upon her return to Fodlan, Eve’s image of this person had been shattered.

It hadn’t been all at once. Eve’s distrust of Rhea had instead been a slow trickle of making excuses for her behaviour until the whole dam broke.

It was a proposition, a simple request that had broken Eve’s resolve. Even her desire to cling to what little family—however distant—that she had couldn’t dismiss what Rhea asked of her.

_“It has to be you, dear child.”_

She could still remember it as if it had happened yesterday.

_“You are the key that I have been missing.”_

She was no key; she was a sacrificial lamb. It was then that she had realised that the familial bond she thought she shared with Rhea had all simply been for show. Rhea had never cared about her; she had only cared about how she could use her.

So when Eve finally returned to Garreg Mach the first time after having hidden in Fraldarius territory for so long, she had been enraged to discover Rhea had never changed. Eve had hoped that her departure would have awoken something in Rhea to realise that her actions were wrong. And yet she had only continued her ridiculous quest to revive the Goddess.

Back then, Eve had hoped to return to Rhea and the tattered remnants of what she could call family. But after only a few months back at the monastery, she had run away again refusing to be complicit in Rhea’s actions.

As Eve thought back on her storied past with Rhea, she heard voices nearby. She looked over to the other side of the landing overlooking the fishing pond to see the Professor standing there. Eve wasn’t surprised she hadn’t noticed Byleth there given how dark it was outside.

But now with the doors to the dining hall open, light poured out to illuminate the Professor as she talked to Dimitri. For some reason beyond her, Eve founder herself ducking further into the shadows to eavesdrop on the two of them.

“I was wondering where you had gone, Professor.” Dimitri said with a smile.

“Dimitri.” The Professor regarded her student casually as she turned to face him. “Do you need something?”

“I simply wanted to ask you to join in the merriment.” Dimitri motioned back towards the open doors of the dining hall.

Eve could hear the laughter and overall jovial chatter pouring out from the door. A strange part of her wondered why Dimitri had gone out looking for the Professor but not her.

She frowned at this thought. Eve wasn’t sure why she cared given she didn’t even want to be at the party in the first place. But for some odd reason it stung to think that Dimitri hadn’t wanted Eve to join him.

“You were instrumental in our victory, Professor.” Dimitri said in response to something Byleth had said while Eve wasn’t paying attention. “Besides, I do not think there are any rules against professors socialising with their students.”

“I just didn’t want to impose since you’re all students.” Byleth shook her head.

“No one will think you are imposing.” Dimitri seemed shocked at this notion. “If anything, I think the others would be happy to see you join us.”

“Very well then.” Byleth nodded. “I suppose I can join for a little while.”

“That makes me happy to hear.” Dimitri smiled. “You go on ahead. I would like some fresh air before I go back inside.”

Byleth nodded once more and retreated into the dining hall, shutting the doors behind her. Eve looked on as Dimitri watched the Professor silently. Once she had closed the doors and both the light and the noise from inside was sealed away, Dimitri’s polite smile and princely posture crumbled away.

He leaned with his hands on the ledge of the promenade, hanging his head down with a hefty sigh. From where Eve stood, he looked exhausted. She had never seen him break character like this before. He was always the upstanding prince who was a paragon of chivalry. But now she could see him for what he had always been—a boy.

He was a boy whose childhood had been stolen away from him. He had lost his family, bearing witness to the worst tragedy the Kingdom had ever experienced. As a result, he was forced to focus on becoming a king as soon as possible. He poured himself into his studies here at the Academy, devoted himself to becoming personable and kind to his peers. Dimitri devoted himself to becoming a good king, putting forward the face that he thought everyone wanted to see.

Eve almost felt like she was violating him by witnessing this moment. She knew he would never want her to see him like this; he would never want anyone to see him like this. Some small part of her could empathise, thinking of how she would never want anyone to see her true self.

Eve decided to allow Dimitri this small moment to himself. Even if he wasn’t aware of her presence, it still felt wrong of her to stay. So she decided to slip away, silently leaving her shadowed corner to make her way to the greenhouse.

* * *

Dimitri let out a sigh as soon as the Professor had closed the door to the dining hall behind her. He was glad she had agreed to join the feast; some of the other students had been asking where she was.

But what he didn’t tell her was that he had actually gone out looking for Eve. At some point in the festivities, he had realised he hadn’t seen Eve since they left Gronder Field. And upon asking Sylvain and Felix, he got the sneaking suspicion that Eve had never made it to the dining hall with the others.

Dimitri hung his head, leaning on the ledge before him, as he thought about the month that had passed. The days had all blended together, one after the other, as they settled into a pattern. He and Eve were amicable, each understanding the limits of the other, but Dimitri knew all too well that he knew precious little about his fiancée.

He always felt that she held him at an arm’s length for some reason. While she was kind to him, he knew that she didn’t open up her heart to him the way she did Felix. At first, he had attributed this to the fact that she had romantic feelings for Felix. But Dimitri was also aware of how close Eve was with Sylvain. He would see the two of them speaking with lowered voices and serious expressions that neither wore around others.

It was becoming increasingly evident to Dimitri that there was nothing he could do to convince Eve to love him. No matter how many times he reached out for her, hoping she would take his hand, she never sought him out—at least not genuinely.

He had hoped that his feelings for Eve would diminish over time, especially knowing that she didn’t love him. But it seemed with each passing day that Dimitri only fell deeper in love with her.

It was the small things that he fell in love with, really—the things that made her seem so human. He loved the way she would brush the tip of her nose with her quill when she was thinking, the way her hands were never idle. He loved watching her in the greenhouse when she thought no one was around and she would sing to the flowers. He loved the way her emerald eyes reflected the sunlight when she looked up at the sky. And, of course, he loved her genuine smile that she would grace him with on occasion.

These were all things that made her seem so different than the woman he had met when he responded to Rodrigue’s call for aide. And Dimitri felt as though these were slivers of the true Eve—pieces of her that he didn’t need to know her past to understand. 

“Eve?”

As he was thinking, Dimitri had looked up and out over the fishing pond below. And from the corner of his eye, he could have sworn that he saw the silhouette of her lithe form slipping into the greenhouse.

Dimitri couldn’t help the excitement in his heart at the idea of getting to speak to Eve alone. So often they were together in front of an audience that made it impossible for her to be candid with him. If he could steal a moment of her time here while everyone was still in the dining hall, perhaps she would share a bit more of her heart with him.

Before he knew it, Dimitri’s feet had brought him to the door of the greenhouse. But as his hand reached out for the handle of the door, he hesitated at the sound of Eve’s voice.

“I didn’t think I’d see you here.”

She seemed to be speaking to someone, but who? Instantly, Dimitri’s mind went to Felix. Perhaps this was one of their secret trysts that he had stumbled upon.

“I could say the same to you. Don’t you want to be partying with the rest of the kiddos?”

_Captain Jeralt?_

Dimitri was taken aback by the voice that he heard responding to Eve. What was the Captain doing in the greenhouse so late at night? And why did Eve seem so familiar with him?

“I don’t really have the energy for all that.” She replied with a sigh.

“Then why didn’t you go to bed?” Jeralt’s question was met with a dry laugh from Eve.

“I suppose some part of me wanted to be missed.” She answered. “Maybe I wanted someone to come and find me and convince me to join the party.”

Dimitri wondered if it was him who she wanted to come find her. He wanted to hear more, unconsciously leaning forward to strain his ears to listen. He knew what he was doing was wrong, but he couldn’t help his desire to eavesdrop.

“You know, I’m a bit jealous of you, Jeralt.” Eve said after a pause, once again surprising Dimitri with how familiar she was with the Captain.

“Oh yeah?” Jeralt sounded amused. “Why’s that?”

“You got to stop ageing when you were already grown.” Eve replied. “I think the reason I find it so easy to revert to my adolescence is because my body is stuck in that time. People perceive me as young, so they treat me as young.”

_Stop… ageing?_

What was Eve talking about? Dimitri found himself rooted to the spot, trying to find to explanation to what he just heard. Surely, he had misunderstood, right? There was no way Eve had just insinuated that both she and Captain Jeralt did not age.

“I don’t know about all that.” The Captain replied just as casually as if they were talking about the fish in the pond. “Being in this old body isn’t all that fun either.”

“Do you remember how old your body is?” Eve asked. “I can still remember the exact day my body stopped ageing.”

“Eh, somewhere in my mid-thirties I think.” Jeralt grunted.

“I was twenty-two.” Eve replied, her voice taking on a wistful tone. “It was three moons after my twenty-second birthday. I remember it because it felt like a steady stream of water had suddenly frozen over. I guess no one would notice there’s a sensation to ageing until it’s gone.”

“Can’t say it felt that poetic for me.” Jeralt’s laugh was hearty, but it fell hollow on Dimitri’s ears.

What in the Goddess’ name were they talking about? They couldn’t truly be talking about not ageing, could they? It was impossible. But there was no denying what Dimitri had heard.

Was this why Eve was so coy about her past? When he had first professed his love for Eve, she had told him her past was complicated and that it was dangerous for him to be involved. Was this what she had meant?

Dimitri felt like his mind was spinning out of control as questions he couldn’t even hope to answer filled his head. One particular question kept resurfacing, though: did Felix know?

It was perhaps the least consequential of the questions Dimitri was thinking of, but it was the one he kept returning to. Was Felix aware that Eve was not the age she appeared? Or was this something that even he didn’t know?

And suddenly, Dimitri’s mind was occupied by only one thing. If Felix didn’t know, it was proof that there was some part of Eve that didn’t belong to him. Dimitri felt almost giddy at the thought, drunk on the idea of knowing some part of Eve more intimately than Felix did.

But that feeling receded almost instantly as Dimitri realised he was not meant to have heard all that Eve had said. She had not confided in him to tell him the truth about her age, he had taken that secret from her without her knowledge.

And suddenly Dimitri felt dirty, guilty that he had invaded Eve’s privacy in this way. But what was he to do? Should he tell her? Confess that he had overheard her conversation with Captain Jeralt? Or was it better to let her go on thinking that her secret was safe?

“…Dimitri.”

Dimitri was snapped cold out of his thoughts by the sound of his own name. Lightning shot down his spine as panic set in that he had been caught. But the door to the greenhouse was still firmly shut and there seemed to have been no alarm in the mention of his name.

“Have you decided how you’ll tell him?” Jeralt asked and Dimitri returned to intently listening to their conversation.

“I don’t know.” Eve’s voice was soft, unsure. “I don’t want to shatter his view of our world.”

“I don’t think you have to.” Jeralt replied.

“What do you mean?” Eve asked.

“He accepted your Crest at face value, didn’t he?” Jeralt paused and Dimitri could imagine Eve nodding silently in response. “So just tell him your Crest also causes you not to age. You don’t have to tell him how old you really are.”

“He’ll certainly ask, though.” Eve sounded sceptical.

“Lie.” Jeralt answered rather bluntly.

“I suppose that’s the easiest way to go about it.” Eve mused.

Dimitri felt his heart sink at this. Would she lie to him again when the time came to reveal the truth about her age?

“Is it silly that a part of me wants to one day trust him enough to tell him the real truth, though?” Eve piped up again.

Dimitri didn’t hear Jeralt’s response over the hammering of his heart in his chest. Eve wanted to trust him, wanted to tell him the truth. It was proof enough to Dimitri that there was some piece of Eve’s heart that cared for him, belonged to him.

It was with this elation in his heart that he returned to the dining hall, his mind filled with the hopes that Eve would someday soon come to him with the truth. And he knew that on that day she would be his. 

A lingering voice in the back of his head, however, wasn’t content without sowing the seed of doubt.

_But what if she doesn’t?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Updates may be a little longer in between in the coming weeks as I've been pretty busy with work. I will still aim to update at least once a week, though.


	35. Thirty-Four

Byleth found Eve and Dimitri in the courtyard as usual, having tea. She was thankful that, as of late, Eve’s movements had been rather predictable. In a situation like this, the Professor wouldn’t have been keen on having to search high and low for wherever Eve disappeared off to when she couldn’t be found with Dimitri.

“Professor.” Dimitri noticed her first as she approached the two. “Would you care to join us for tea?”

“No.” Byleth shook her head. “I need to ask a favour.”

“A favour?” Eve looked up at her curiously, lips pursed.

“Felix received a letter from his father asking for aide.” Byleth explained. “He’s gone ahead but has asked me to recruit some members of the class to come help.”

“Lord Rodrigue is safe, I trust?” Dimitri asked, casting a wary glance at Eve.

“It seems there are bandits running lose in Fraldarius territory. There’s a possibility they might be the remnants of Miklan’s men from the conflict at Conand Tower.” Byleth shrugged. “I don’t think Lord Rodrigue is in any mortal danger. But I do think time is of the essence.”

“Then we should leave at once.” Eve cut in, already standing up from her seat.

“The others are all ready to go.” Byleth nodded. “We can leave once you two are ready.”

* * *

“I am sure all is fine, Eve.” Dimitri comforted, turning his head to speak over his shoulder at her.

The Blue Lions were already most of the way to Fraldarius, and with each minute on the road Eve had become more and more tense.

“I know.” Eve huffed, but her hold around his waist tightened from where she sat behind him on his horse. “I know how strong Rodrigue is. I’m more worried about Felix…”

She felt guilty for saying it as soon as the words left her lips, feeling how Dimitri’s posture stiffened.

“Of course.” He said, his voice rigid. “Felix is a good fighter, though, I’m sure you have nothing to worry about.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about.” Eve replied gently. “I’m worried about Felix lashing out at Rodrigue. I don’t know what he was thinking asking Felix to come out here. And I don’t know what Felix was thinking asking everyone else to come as well.”

“I cannot claim to know what goes on in Felix’s mind.” Dimitri admitted with a light shake of his head.

Eve let out an amused huff at that but said nothing more. And for the remainder of their ride into Fraldarius territory, she remained silent.

Dimitri knew that there was a storied past between Rodrigue and his son as well as Rodrigue and Eve. And a rather juvenile part of him was eager to see the Fraldarius Lord in the same setting with Eve. He was hoping that perhaps being around someone she trusted would allow for Eve to open up a little more.

“I see them!” Ingrid called out from above on her pegasus when the class approached a town on the outskirts of Fraldarius territory.

The Blue Lions looked out to see Rodrigue and his men on the ground fighting a large group of bandits. And amongst the fighting was Felix, backed into a corner with a dozen or so enemies surrounding him.

“Felix!” Eve cried out when she saw him.

Without a second thought, Dimitri spurred his horse on to rush to Felix’s aid. The rest of the class followed suit, rushing into the chaos to lend a hand without waiting for the Professor’s orders.

As soon as they drew near, Eve hopped down from Dimitri’s horse to put herself between Felix and one of his attackers.

“What are you thinking?” Eve shouted at him as she cut through her opponent in a flash of steel. “Are you _trying_ to get yourself killed?”

“I knew you’d show up in time.” Felix said confidently, though Eve didn’t trust his words.

There wasn’t much time for more words to be exchanged as their forces focused on driving back the bandits while also protecting the villagers in the town.

“Oh, Prince Dimitri is here to help!” Rodrigue called out in surprise when the Blue Lions met up with him and his men. “I am humbled, Your Highness, and so sorry to trouble you.”

“No, it is fine.” Dimitri shook his head. “As a man of royal birth, this is the obvious course. However, it does not exactly seem like they are remnants of Miklan's faction.”

“Indeed.” Rodrigue agreed as he disposed of a bandit that rushed towards them. “Nothing but common bandits, and yet... Ruffians like that have recently surged in number.”

“Pathetic. Struggling to defeat some ragtag bandits.” Felix cut in with more than a little venom in his voice.

“Felix…” There was a certain sadness in Rodrigue’s eyes as he regarded his son. “You may know this already, but no matter how many you kill, more always appear. Anywhere in the Kingdom these days you can see the same kind of scenes. His Majesty, the late king, would despair to see it.”

“A dead man doesn’t despair.” Felix scoffed. “Besides, let’s focus on the living.”

Eve watched the exchange between the three silently, not daring to voice her own opinions. Now wasn’t the time; not in front of all the other Blue Lions and the Professor. In front of the others, Rodrigue was nothing more than a stranger—the father of one of her classmates.

But all of those careful thought’s flew out the window the moment Eve saw a group of bandits rushing the Fraldarius Lord. He had been left exposed after a number of his men and the students had spread out in order to help more villagers evacuate. She was the closest one to him, the only one who would be able to make it in time to stop the blade that was about to cut into his back.

“Rodrigue!” She shouted urgently as she dove forward, narrowly blocking his assailant’s sword with one of her own.

He turned around to see her shove the blade away and land a swift kick into the bandit’s stomach. But while she ran her sword into the bandit that had initially struck towards Rodrigue, another one ran a short dagger into her side.

“Shit.” She hissed as she elbowed the bandit that had stabbed her and hit him with a fire spell to the face.

Eve didn’t have to worry about the rest of the bandits as they were disposed of quickly, all rapidly run through with a lance in a flash of silver and blonde and blue.

“Eve.” It was Dimitri who came to stand by her.

“I’m fine!” She gritted her teeth and held a hand to her bloody side. “Worry about the villagers.”

“But…” Dimitri’s brow knitted in worry.

“I said--!” Eve grimaced, cutting herself off as she activated her Crest and a bandit that was rapidly approaching Ashe suddenly clutched his side in pain. “I’m fine.”

“You! You’re His Highness’ fiancée, are you not?” Rodrigue asked after he had finished disposing of the other bandits surrounding them. “That is quite an impressive Crest you bear. I thank you for your assistance.”

Eve gave Rodrigue a knowing nod before examining the hole in her uniform shirt. The fabric was bloodied, but there was no other evidence left that she had ever been injured. Not even a scar remained where once the dagger had torn through her flesh.

After that mishap, though, the remainder of the battle went by without incident. The combined forces of Rodrigue’s men and the Blue Lions class were able to dispose of all of the bandits with no civilian casualties.

As thanks for their assistance, Rodrigue had invited them all back to stay at the Fraldarius estate for the night to feast and rest before making the trek back to Garreg Mach. And despite Felix’s clear aversion to the idea, the Professor gratefully accepted Rodrigue’s invitation.

But while the Blue Lions enjoyed a feast in the Fraldarius dining hall, there was a notable absence that concerned Felix. Much like after the Battle of the Eagle and Lion, no one had seen Eve since they had departed the battlefield. Not even his father had seen her in the time since they returned to the Fraldarius estate.

So Felix found a quiet moment to slip away from the feast to find Eve. He had imagined she would be happy to be back in Fraldarius, in a house she knew very well. It was why Felix had asked the Professor to recruit the others for this battle. He had wanted to give Eve an excuse to come back to a place she felt at home in.

After quite some time of wandering through the estate and even checking the servant’s quarters to no avail, Felix decided to take a walk outside. And though he wasn’t conscious of it, his feet ended up taking him towards the Fraldarius graveyard where the remains of his ancestors were laid to rest.

It had been a very long time since he had paid a visit to his brother. There was something so unsettling, so upsetting, about the idea of Glenn’s remains being there just beneath the cold dirt. After the funeral, he hadn’t ever really wanted to return. And yet now his feet had brought him here.

But just as Felix was about to turn away from the graveyard and the notion of his own mortality, he heard what sounded like a hiccup.

“I’ve missed you.”

There was no mistaking who that slurred voice belonged to. Silently, Felix crept forward, sticking to the shadows, to see Eve sitting in front of Glenn’s headstone with several discarded wineskins around her.

“Everything is terrible.” She slurred after taking a sip from one of the wineskins that seemed to still be filled with liquid. “The Officer’s Academy is stifling, Dimitri is in love with me, Rhea is a nightmare.”

Felix couldn’t help but stare in awed silence at Eve’s state. She was absolutely inebriated—even having a hard time sitting up straight. He knew she would often drink with Sylvain in the town when they could sneak away or in Abyss with Yuri when leaving campus wasn’t possible, but he had never seen her lose her wits from drink.

And as he watched her drink with his brother’s grave, Felix couldn’t for the life of him figure out why she would get this drunk. Was there something about being back in Fraldarius that made her upset to the point of drinking herself into oblivion?

He had known she was close to Glenn; she had told him that Glenn knew everything since he was in line to become the head of House Fraldarius. But for what reason would she be here, alone, talking to a dead man’s grave rather than him or even Sylvain or Dimitri?

“You know,” she hiccupped, “he almost beat me in a duel the other day. I think you’d be proud of him.”

It took a moment for Felix to realise she was speaking about him. And though he felt he shouldn’t continue to eavesdrop, he couldn’t get his feet to move.

“He’s become so much like you were.” She laughed. “So stubborn and headstrong and talented and… hmm and handsome.”

Felix blushed at her words of praise, especially at the idea of her saying that he was handsome.

“Wish you were here to knock some sense into him, though.” Eve clicked her tongue before taking another swig of her wine. “If there’s anyone he’d listen to, it’s you. I don’t know how to get him to talk to your father again.”

“You know,” she continued, her voice making the drastic shift from jovial to melancholy, “he’s the only one who doesn’t look at me like I’m the reason you’re dead.”

“Even _I_ look at myself like I’m the reason you’re dead.”

Her laugh was hollow and sad, choked off by another hiccup. She drowned it in another drink from her wineskin, finishing off the rest of the liquid inside.

“Rodrigue does it too.” She said softly. “I know he doesn’t mean to, neither does Dimitri. I told him I didn’t want to go to Duscur, I begged him to let me stay behind. I should have been there. I know he doesn’t blame me consciously, but…”

An unexplained anger bubbled up in Felix’s throat. Was his father the reason Eve was acting like this? Of course it would be his weak old man’s fault. Leave it to his father to blame Eve for something she couldn’t control.

Felix was brought out of his seething thoughts of anger by a choked sob coming from Eve.

“How did I mess up so bad?” She had her head in her hands now, shaking it as she spoke. “I didn’t mean to have all these feelings for him.”

Felix’s ears perked up once more, eager to hear Eve speak on her feelings for him. Like him, she was never one much to let her feelings be known. And though it always felt like she was holding herself back from letting herself have emotions towards Felix, in this inebriated state there was no way she could keep her guard up.

“I…” She paused for a moment, snapping her head up to look at Glenn’s headstone as if it were the man himself. “I think I’m in love with him, Glenn.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for the short and delayed chapter. I've been very busy with work and haven't had much time to write. I will still try to update at least once a week, though, schedule permitting.


	36. Thirty-Five

“I’m sorry. I don’t know why I would tell you that.”

As soon as she said the words, Eve regretted them. All this time she had convinced herself that as long as she didn’t admit it, she wasn’t actually in love with Felix. But here she was admitting it not just to herself but to her dead lover.

Her dead lover whose younger brother she was now in love with.

“This is fucked.” She shook her head at herself, eyes scanning over Glenn’s grave as if she would find his face there looking back at her.

There was so much wrong with the situation. Her love for Glenn had been morally questionable to begin with. He had always joked that she would never find someone her age—which was true. The list of eligible bachelors anywhere near her age was limited to Seteth and Seteth only.

But Eve had still always felt rather predatory about it—with Glenn as well as her other previous romantic partners. What made her situation now even worse was that Felix was still just a child. Only taking physical age into account, it was still a questionable relationship.

And all of that wasn’t to mention that Felix was her former lover’s younger brother. That issue alone was enough to raise eyebrows. Even now after admitting to herself—and Glenn—that she loved Felix, Eve still wasn’t positive that those feelings weren’t just her projecting the remnants of her love for his brother onto him.

“Glenn…” She whispered, wine-stained lips separating as she tried to find her words. “What do I do?”

Her voice cracked as she finally let the tears that were blurring her vision fall upon her cheeks.

“You always chose your duty; I know that’s what you’d tell me to do.” Eve hung her head, already knowing the answer to her question.

She just didn’t want to hurt any of them. The truth was, she hadn’t wanted to be in love with anyone.

It was why she had reacted so vehemently against Dimitri’s proclamation of love. Eve knew herself well enough to know that Dimitri was exactly the kind of person she could learn to love. He was kind, well-spoken, attentive to others, loyal—all the things she had loved in Glenn. But loving anyone else so soon after losing him felt like betraying Glenn.

So she pushed Dimitri away; refused his affections because she wouldn’t let herself love anyone other than Glenn. She thought entertaining her little flirtation with Felix, a living reminder of the person she let die, would help push Dimitri away.

Eve had initially been drawn to Felix because of how much he reminded her of Glenn. But very quickly she realised how different the two brothers were and her feelings for Felix started to blossom.

It was almost as if when he died Glenn had split into two people—Dimitri and Felix. His kindness went to Dimitri; the gentle part of him that was tender with Eve and protective of Felix. And his fire had gone to Felix; his passion and his brashness taking root in his younger brother.

“I promised him until the wedding.” She whispered to herself, to Glenn, to the Goddess, to anyone listening. “I won’t decide until that time comes.”

* * *

Felix found himself unable to sleep after returning to his childhood quarters and settling into bed. His head was swirling with thoughts of Eve—her proclamation of love, her drunkenness, her relationship with Glenn.

It still bothered him that Eve would have preferred to take her problems to a tombstone than to any of her living friends. Did she truly not trust any of them that much? Or was her relationship with Glenn so much stronger than she had led him to believe?

It felt odd to be back home, knowing as much as he did now. He wondered how many times he had passed Eve in these very halls. How many times had she greeted him? How many times had she brought him his supper in his room when he refused to eat in the same room as his father? How many times had he disregarded her humanity because she was nothing more than a servant to him?

With a sigh, Felix pulled his sheets back and climbed out of his bed. He knew he wasn’t going to get to sleep anytime soon, so he might as well wander the halls he knew so well.

He found himself walking towards the area of the estate where his father took up residence. Felix was curious to know if Eve might have stayed in that wing for the night to be close to his father who she was still so loyal to.

And as he came to a secluded hall far from where he and the other Blue Lions were staying, he saw a door open just a crack with light pouring from it.

He walked over on silent feet, peering into the opening from the shadows of the hallway. Inside, he saw a raging fire in a hearth that illuminated the room in its bright glow. Sitting before it on a sofa were two figures speaking to each other in low voices.

It took a moment for Felix to register the figures as Eve and his father. They seemed so comfortable, almost too much so. Eve had drawn her feet up onto the sofa and was leaning into his father’s side, her head resting on his shoulder. It made Felix feel rather uncomfortable to see her be so familiar with his father in this way.

And that discomfort was almost enough to outweigh his curiosity as to why the two of them would be together at this hour. He was considering walking away until he heard his own name.

“How much have you told Felix?” It was his father who spoke, turning his head just slightly to look down at Eve’s face.

“Not much.” Much to Felix’s relief, Eve straightened up to answer Rodrigue and now sat cross-legged facing him. “He doesn’t remember me which is probably for the best.”

“Will you tell him the truth?” Rodrigue asked.

Felix pricked up his ears to hear Eve’s response. He had thought he knew a considerable amount about Eve given she had very quickly told him about her Crest and her relationship with his family. To hear her say she hadn’t told him much of the truth was astonishing.

“No, I don’t think I will.” Her answer sent ice down Felix’s spine. “It serves no purpose for him to know. Once I am married to Dimitri, I will no longer serve house Fraldarius.”

“I suppose that is fair.” Rodrigue muttered. “It does feel rather melancholic to send you away after all you’ve done for this family.”

Felix remembered what Eve had said in the graveyard about his father blaming her, but from the way they spoke he couldn’t pick up on anything like that. Remembering how she had been earlier, though, made him wonder when she had come back inside and sobered up.

“You’re not sending me away, Rodrigue.” Eve shook her head. “You’ve given me another chance.”

“I must say I am truly astounded by the attention His Highness pays to you.” Rodrigue mused. “The way he came to your aid on the battlefield—I’ve never seen him act so rapidly.”

“He’s a good man.” Eve dipped her head in a shallow nod of agreement.

“What about my Felix?” Once again, Felix perked up at the mention of his own name. “I trust he’s not given you any trouble?”

“Trouble?” Eve laughed. “No. He and I have become very close.”

“That is good to know. I know how much it used to hurt you to see him.” Rodrigue said.

How much it hurt her to see him? Had he hurt Eve in some way that he didn’t remember? What had he done to her? Panic was coursing through Felix’s veins as he tried to decipher what it was his father’s words meant and the blood rushing in his ears wasn’t making it any easier for him to hear their quiet conversation.

“I know how much you blamed yourself for Glenn’s loss despite the fact that you two were never that close.” Rodrigue continued. “And I know how much Felix reminded you of his brother. I do sometimes marvel at how similar the two of them look.”

Never that close? The way Eve had described it to Felix, Glenn had been her confidant and they were close simply because of the order of succession. But if she had hidden it from his father, what exactly was her relationship with Glenn? Had they been close for some reason other than their circumstances?

After a few months of feeling like he was getting closer and closer to Eve, suddenly Felix felt like he had been pushed to the farthest reaches of her life. He knew nothing about her. He had prided himself in knowing more than the boar, in being trusted with information from her, but in actuality he knew nothing.

“You do realise he’s not Glenn, right?” Eve’s voice brought Felix back to reality.

He was stunned by the severity in her inflection. Obviously, she and his father were close, but he couldn’t imagine her taking on such an accusatory tone with someone she respected. Not to mention the power dynamic between a Lord and his servant.

“I know this.” Rodrigue’s voice sounded rather defensive in response.

“You need to talk to your son before you lose him too.” Eve said.

“Excuse me?” Rodrigue balked. “Are you telling me how I should father my own child?”

“Rodrigue, you and I have known each other for a very long time.” Eve’s voice was level, firm. “I think it’s time I stopped standing on ceremony.”

“Then what is it you are trying to say?” He asked, still defensive yet willing to hear her out.

“Felix feels like he’s living in his brother’s shadow.” Eve said sorrowfully.

Felix felt conflicted about the way she talked about him. On the one hand, it felt gratifying to know how much she cared about him and that she would stand up for him against his father. On the other hand, however, it irritated him that she felt like he couldn’t fight his own battles. He didn’t need her to talk to his father for him—he hadn’t asked her.

“When Glenn died, you acted like you had no more sons.” Eve continued. “And rather than be there when Felix needed you most, you turned to Dimitri as a surrogate son.”

“His Highness had just lost his entire family.” Rodrigue shook his head. “Was I supposed to leave him without any support?”

“I’m not saying that.” Eve sounded irritated. “What I’m saying is your _son_ needed—needs—you. And instead all you’ve done is bolster Dimitri and hold him up on a pedestal while constantly comparing Felix to Glenn. You’re always talking about the dead—Glenn, Lambert—but you turned your back on those of us that are still living.”

“If Felix had an issue with it, he would tell me.” Rodrigue replied stiffly.

“He has!” Eve burst out in indignation. “You say he’s got a temper and that he doesn’t respect you, but those are just a result of him feeling like you never cared about him or Glenn. Do you have any idea how much Felix is still hurting from Glenn’s death?”

“I know that we all processed his brother’s death in different ways.” Rodrigue sighed. “I simply cannot bring myself to condone his hostile actions and engage with him when he is being like this. He gives me no opportunity to speak with him.”

“You have to show him you trust him.” Eve said. “I think a show of good faith would go a long way to repairing your relationship. Let Felix know that you trust him, that you don’t just see him as a child or as Glenn’s little brother.”

“A show of good faith…?” Rodrigue muttered in thought. “Unfortunately, I have no idea what I could do to show Felix I trust him. Which I suppose has proved your point.”

“Well,” Eve seemed oddly prepared with a suggestion, “he bears the Major Crest of Fraldarius, does he not?”

* * *

The next morning, as the Blue Lions were readying to return to Garreg Mach, Felix approached Eve the second she was without Dimitri. She was helping a few of the others to pack up the rest of their belongings and some provisions for the journey back.

“You told my father to give me the Aegis Shield, didn’t you?” Felix brandished the Relic as he spoke, its unusual glow illuminating the space between them.

He had left the night before shortly after Eve had suggested his father show Felix he trusted him. He had heard her mention his Crest, but nothing more. And after that, he hadn’t had the patience to put up with any more of his father’s blubbering.

“I don’t tell Rodrigue what to do.” She shook her head, looking at the shield with mild surprise.

There was something else in her eyes too—sadness?

“I heard you last night.” Felix replied, earning himself a worried glance from Eve.

“I just planted the seed in his mind.” Eve answered. “Felix, I do hope you don’t make a habit of eavesdropping on my conversations.”

“What was your relationship with Glenn?” Felix asked suddenly.

“Felix, you know this.” Eve’s brow furrowed and a small frown settled on her lips.

“No.” Felix shook his head. “I know what you told me. But based on what I heard last night; you didn’t tell me the truth. My father thought that you weren’t close with Glenn. If you were only close to him because he was next in line to become Lord, then he would’ve known about it.”

“I never said I was close to him only because he was set to inherit your father’s title.” Eve shook her head again, walking away to grab some of the baggage to load onto the horses.

“You implied it, though.” Felix followed after her.

“Yes, that’s true.” Eve sighed in resignation. “I phrased it the way I did because I wanted you to misunderstand. You know I don’t like talking about my past.”

“But I thought it’d be different with me.” Felix couldn’t help the dejection that crept into his voice. “I thought you trusted me.”

“I do.” Eve stopped dead in her tracks to fiercely meet Felix’s gaze. “Felix, it is important to me that you know I trust you.”

“How am I supposed to know that you trust me when you never give me a straight answer?” Felix asked, genuine hurt in his eyes.

Eve continued on in silence for a moment, chewing at the inside of her lip. Felix followed after her, helping her lift the heavy bag she was holding to secure it onto someone’s horse.

“Do you know why I like you, Felix?” Eve asked after quite some time of quiet thought.

“No.” Felix shook his head.

Genuinely he sometimes wondered why Eve would ever be drawn to him—especially when he thought about how he treated her when she first arrived at the monastery.

“It’s because you live in the present.” She answered. “Everyone around me is so stuck in the past, myself included.”

“What does this have to do with anything?” Felix frowned.

“I don’t tell you much truth about the past because I’m tired of living in it.” Eve faced him once more, meeting his eyes to convey her sincerity. “I don’t avoid telling you about the past because I don’t trust you. It’s because I don’t want you to be one more person in my life who is more concerned about who I used to be than who I am now.”

“So I have to ask: can you be satisfied by that?”

Her question took Felix by surprise. Could he? Could he be content knowing that Eve was purposefully concealing her past from him?

Part of him had so many questions boiling inside of him after all he had overheard the previous night. He wanted to know more about her relationship with Glenn and with his father. She was so familiar with his father in a way that was astounding for a myriad of reasons. And yet Rodrigue had been under the impression that Eve and Glenn had not really been close before the Tragedy of Duscur.

And he still had so much he wanted to ask about why she would get so drunk and turn to Glenn’s grave to bare her soul. He still didn’t understand why she would have been that upset in the first place to be back in Fraldarius territory. And he especially didn’t understand why she wouldn’t have turned to someone who could actually offer her advice.

But Eve’s gaze was so earnest, so hopeful. He remembered what she had said to Glenn’s tombstone the night before.

_He’s the only one who doesn’t look at me like I’m the reason you’re dead._

Could he really live with himself if he took that away from her? And if he asked too many questions, would he still be the person she had told Glenn she was in love with?

“I’ll be satisfied as long as you don’t push me away.” Felix avoided her eyes as he spoke, trying his best to keep his composure despite saying something so embarrassing.

“You have no idea how happy that makes me.” Eve whispered so that only the two of them could hear her voice.

“Eve!” Dimitri’s shout cut into their moment before Felix could respond. “Are you ready to depart? We will be embarking soon.”

“I should go.” Eve turned back to offer Felix a small smile. “I’ll see you back at the monastery.”

With another smile and a shallow dip of her head, Eve moved to walk past Felix and towards where Dimitri stood by their horse. But just as she passed, Felix was overcome by the impulse to have the last word—to let her know that he had overheard her not just with his father but in the graveyard as well.

He wanted to say something to make sure that he would be the one on her mind as she clung to the boar’s back on the ride to Garreg Mach. And so, he turned his head slightly to let his lips just barely ghost on the shell of her ear as he whispered to her:

“I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My schedule for this coming week is insane, so I'm uploading this now while I have a chance. Hopefully I'll be able to get another chapter out during the week, though.


	37. Thirty-Six

Whatever it was that Felix said to Eve as she approached Dimitri, it had her widening her eyes in terror. Her confident stride momentarily stuttered as she blinked to regain her composure.

Dimitri couldn’t help but wonder what it was he had said to her. And as she drew closer to him, it became evident that whatever it was had shaken her to her core.

“Is everything alright?” Dimitri asked, trying his best to sound casual and not like he was prying.

“…yes.” Eve faltered momentarily as if she hadn’t heard him initially. “Just a little sad to be leaving Fraldarius again.”

Dimitri knew that wasn’t the issue, but he knew pushing the matter wouldn’t get him anywhere. Instead, he nodded curtly and turned to mount his steed. Once he was in position, he turned to offer his hand for Eve, but she had already somehow found a hold on the saddle and was hoisting herself up by that alone.

With a pang in his heart, Dimitri wondered if she did this intentionally. He was always offering his hand to her, inviting her to reach out to him. Dimitri was a man of his word and he was determined to stick to his promise never to touch Eve unless she invited it or asked it of him. But that didn’t mean he didn’t want to have contact with her. And so he foolishly continued to offer his hand to her, hoping one day she would take it.

“Did you have a chance to catch up with Rodrigue?” Dimitri asked as casually as he could as they set out. “I know the two of you didn’t have a chance to really speak when he was last at the monastery.”

“Rodrigue is just as stubborn as always.” She chuckled in response though Dimitri got the feeling it was more to herself. “Though for once he finally listened to me. I hope it does some good.”

“Listened to you?” Dimitri prompted. “What did you say to him?”

“I suggested he give Felix the Fraldarius Relic.” She answered.

“Why would you do that?” Dimitri tried to keep his tone light, simply curious rather than stunned.

“Rodrigue needs to show Felix he trusts him if they’re ever going to start to mend their relationship.” Eve replied with a certain melancholy. “They’re all they have left; it would break my heart to see the Fraldarius family fall apart because two stubborn boys refuse to talk to each other.”

It struck Dimitri as odd that Eve would refer to Felix and Rodrigue as boys rather than men. But then all of a sudden, he was reminded of the conversation between her and Captain Jeralt that he had overheard.

To Eve, Rodrigue and Felix were just boys—so much younger than her that she couldn’t consider them men.

But even considering this, it still was odd to Dimitri that Eve would be so unguarded as to phrase it that way. She always gave off the impression that she was very meticulous with her words. Referring to Rodrigue as a boy was sure to raise questions in anyone’s mind regardless of how much they knew about her.

Perhaps it was a test. Or perhaps this was a sign that Eve actually wanted to tell Dimitri the truth. She wanted to trust him, secretly cared for him deeply.

_Disgusting. With just one word you can convince yourself of a delusion._

The voices of the dead echoed in Dimitri’s mind, quashing the hope that had started to rise in his chest. They were right, of course. He was making something out of nothing. She was probably just calling them boys to emphasise her point that they were childishly stubborn.

“You truly care about House Fraldarius, don’t you?” Dimitri asked, clearing his throat when he realised he hadn’t responded to Eve.

“I just don’t want to see another family fall apart.”

Dimitri felt the weight of Eve resting her forehead against his shoulder blades as she spoke. Once again, he was surprised at how uncharacteristically unguarded Eve was being with him.

She seemed preoccupied; too worried about something else to focus on keeping her defences up.

“What did Felix say to you before we left?” Dimitri pressed his luck, wondering if her preoccupation would reward him with the truth.

“He said he loves me too.” She muttered into his back.

Dimitri stiffened. He had in fact been awarded the truth, but now he rather wished he hadn’t.

“T-too?” He stammered, not daring to look back at her.

“Last night I went to speak with Glenn.” Eve answered. “Felix must’ve overheard when I told his brother I think I’m in love with him.”

“I see.” Dimitri swallowed the lump in his throat.

Once again, he didn’t know why he was so affected by this. He knew that Eve did not love him; he knew that she was involved with Felix. But back in Abyss she had told Felix she didn’t love him and that she wouldn’t let herself. That had been of some comfort to Dimitri, but now all of that was shattered.

“I’m sorry.” Eve apologised, bringing her head up from where it rested on his back. “Normally, I would have lied.”

“I prefer the truth.” Dimitri lied.

“The lies never hurt, though.” Eve was quick to reply.

“They do when I find out they’re lies.” Dimitri shook his head.

“If.” Eve corrected.

“Sorry?” Dimitri frowned at the road ahead.

“If you find out they’re lies.”

She was right, of course. Dimitri had no ideas how many lies Eve had told him, so he could only attest to the ones he had exposed as lies.

He wondered if she would ever tell him the whole truth; if there would ever come a day where she trusted him enough to do so. But Dimitri also wasn’t sure if he’d ever deserve that. Could he ever become a person who would be deserving of Eve’s trust and affections? Even a person she thought she loved like Felix didn’t know the whole truth, so how could Dimitri believe he’d ever earn the privilege?

“I’m sorry you had to love someone like me.” Eve said quietly, almost inaudible.

Dimitri was once again stunned by her behaviour. Being back in Fraldarius had triggered some kind of dramatic shift in Eve. She seemed almost as if she were mourning—caught somewhere between someone she used to be and the person she had become.

“You have no need to apologise to me.” Dimitri said in response.

“After the wedding, I promise I’ll be good.” Eve leaned her head against Dimitri’s back again.

Her voice sounded like she was trying to be comforting. Instead, her tone and wording made it sound more to Dimitri that she was a hostage. He had accepted this proposal in the first place because he thought it would give Eve freedom.

Dimitri had never been keen on the idea of an arranged marriage but had always known it was the most likely path for him. The idea of chaining some poor stranger to his life had been a source of great dread for Dimitri.

So he had thought that marrying Eve would be the perfect solution. Rather than imprisoning someone as his queen, he was allowing Eve to be free in her marriage to him.

He had been foolish to think such a thing, though; to think that anyone could love him as he was and be happy with him.

“Once we are wed, I will put an end to all of this.” Eve added in that sad voice of hers. “I will be a good wife and you will have a family again.”

“I will do everything in my power to make you happy, Eve.” Dimitri’s voice caught in his throat, choked by the unnameable emotions that were clouding his mind. “So, please, don’t sound so sad.”

“I know you would.” She sighed. “That’s why it’s so sad.”

* * *

When they returned to the monastery and their usual routines, something had shifted— and Eve knew it was her fault.

She had been too candid with Dimitri on their ride back from Fraldarius territory. Between her unexpected reaction to being back to her conversation with Rodrigue to Felix telling her he loved her, Eve hadn’t been guarded enough. She had said too much and had hurt Dimitri deeply.

Being back in that estate, walking those same halls she used to walk with Glenn, had had an impact on Eve that she hadn’t been prepared for. It had been years since Glenn’s death; Eve had walked those very halls thousands of times without him. Being back shouldn’t have affected her as much.

And yet as soon as she had entered the estate she knew so well, Eve had been overcome by grief. It was almost as if in being away she had convinced herself that Glenn wasn’t dead, and she could return to Fraldarius and he would be there waiting for her.

But, of course, he hadn’t been there upon her return. His quarters were still empty—left untouched as it had been all those years.

“How’re you holding up?”

Eve snapped out of her daze to look up at Sylvain from where she sat on the edge of the fishing pond’s pier.

“I thought we agreed we don’t ask questions.” Eve looked back out at the water as the redhead plopped down to sit beside her.

“I think we both know how unhealthy that was.” Sylvain laughed bitterly. “I know you’re not gonna talk to Felix or His Highness about it.”

“I said too much and I hurt Dimitri’s feelings.” Eve muttered.

“I don’t care about that right now.” Sylvain’s voice was uncharacteristically serious, causing Eve to look over at him curiously. “I asked how you’re doing.”

“Does it really matter?” Eve shook her head softly.

“Yeah, it does.” Sylvain nodded earnestly. “This was your first time back in Fraldarius since everything happened. Don’t think I didn’t notice you disappeared when we got back from fighting.”

“I went to see Glenn.” She sighed, finally giving in. “I… I told him I think I’m in love with Felix.”

“Are you?” Sylvain jolted back in surprise.

“Yes?” Eve frowned. “Maybe? I don’t know.”

Sylvain wrapped an arm around Eve’s shoulders and pulled her into his side, resting his head atop hers. She knew he didn’t know what to say—neither did she. Both Dimitri and Felix were his friends, and she knew he wouldn’t want to see either of them hurt.

“You know His Highness would do anything for you, right?” Sylvain finally asked.

“Yes.” Eve nodded. “Though I don’t know why.”

“If you truly love Felix,” Sylvain lowered his voice, “there’s no doubt in my mind that His Highness would do anything to make sure you’re happy.”

“What are you saying?” Eve pulled away from Sylvain to look at his face, confused.

“You promised Felix until the wedding, but maybe you could come to an agreement with His Highness about maintaining a secret relationship with Fe.” Sylvain shrugged.

“No.” Eve balked, shaking her head. “No, I won’t do that to him.”

“Then do you really love Felix?” Sylvain asked in response. “If you’re willing to put a hard deadline on your relationship, do you love him?”

“That’s not fair, Sylvain.” Eve shook her head again. “There’s so much more at play than just the three of us for it to be that simple.”

“Remember what I said to you a while ago, though?” Sylvain cocked his head to the side. “About how you loved Glenn so much you would put anything else to the side for him?”

“Yes.” Eve nodded. “And I remember you asking me if I would do the same for Felix.”

“Would you?” Sylvain prompted with raised eyebrows.

“Things are different now.” Eve sighed. “Back then it was just Rodrigue that I would be defying.”

There was so much more to it now, so many more factors that kept her from thinking about her relationship with Felix. One of those being Dimitri, though she’d never admit that.

“What about His Highness?” Sylvain asked suddenly—almost as if he could read her mind.

“What about him?” Eve’s brow furrowed in response.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk about how you feel about him.” Sylvain mused, stretching his arms above his head.

“That’s because I don’t.” Eve replied quickly—as if to stop her own mind from thinking about it.

“You don’t feel for him?” Sylvain raised a sceptical eyebrow.

“You know that’s not what I mean.” Eve sighed.

“Do I know what you mean?” Sylvain raised an eyebrow again. “The way you are with His Highness… I mean, some of that’s got to be real, right? That can’t all be an act.”

“Can’t it be?” Eve frowned.

How did she feel about Dimitri? She never gave it much thought past knowing she couldn’t return his feelings of love.

To be fair, Eve wasn’t sure she could love Dimitri even if she wanted to. Neither of them were truly the person they were on the outside. Sure, Dimitri was kind and attentive and chivalrous on all counts. Eve knew, however, that there was so much darkness hidden beneath that façade. She felt that she couldn’t speak on how she felt about Dimitri because she didn’t actually know who he was.

“Why did you promise Dimitri so much?” Sylvain asked after a pause.

“All I promised was to be a good wife.” Eve said with a frown.

“That’s a lot, kitten.” Sylvain sighed. “Because whatever a ‘good’ wife is, that’s up to interpretation. You and I both know that His Highness will expect too much of you with a promise like that.”

“He deserves someone who will be good to him.” Eve looked back out at the water, swinging her legs delicately.

“Why do you care so much?” Sylvain asked, peering over to look at Eve’s face.

“Because Lambert--“

“No.” Sylvain cut her off. “I know that’s not it. Do you only care about Felix because of your guilt for Glenn?”

“Of course not.” Eve snapped her head up to look at him.

“Then I refuse to believe that’s the only reason you care so deeply for His Highness.” Sylvain said, softer this time.

“Sylvain, what are you hoping to get out of this?” Eve looked at him curiously, trying to read his features for any ulterior motives.

She didn’t know why he was suddenly pressing her so much. He had, of course, bothered her previously about whether or not she loved Felix, but it had never really gone beyond teasing. Now, he seemed to truly want her to make up her mind.

“I can see that it’s killing you, kitten.” Sylvain shook his head softly. “I thought maybe forcing you to think about it would help you make up your mind. You need to consider why you care so much for His Highness when deciding what to do about how you feel for Felix.”

“I feel so guilty thinking about it, though.” Eve wrapped her arms around herself, thinking about the arms she wished were wrapped around her. “I don’t think I’ll ever love someone the way I loved Glenn”

“That’s the point, though. You can’t compare how you feel about Felix or Dimitri to how you felt about Glenn.” Sylvain replied.

“Sylvain, do you really think you’re in the position to be giving relationship advice?” Eve half-laughed, trying to distract herself from the turmoil that was beginning to brew in her heart.

“Just… promise me you’ll think about it.” Sylvain grinned sympathetically at her. “I know it’s not fair, but it affects all three of you if you don’t make up your mind.”

“I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the delay in the update. Work has been crazy busy and I've just had no time to write. I also apologise for the shorter update. The next update will be the remire mission, so I promise it'll be a longer chapter. Thanks for sticking with me, I hope everyone enjoys the story so far. I really appreciate all and any comments, so don't be afraid to leave them :)


	38. Thirty-Seven

The cold Faerghus air had Eve’s breath hanging in clouds as she panted from exertion. And though the nights had gotten increasingly chillier as autumn came to the northern lands, Eve was still stripped down to her undershirt with sweat making a trail down her neck.

“Come on, Tsukiko.” She whispered to herself in what was either encouragement or exasperation.

Three nights of training and she still couldn’t get that manoeuvre down. Her footwork was all wrong, causing her to lose her balance.

She was just lucky it had been her who took the blow from that assassin and not Rodrigue. She had never seen someone move like that, and the rapidly healing wound on her waist was a sore reminder that she had been bested.

In her many years, Eve had racked up a number of similar scars. The marks that marred her skin were all reminders of times that she had lost— times where she should have been better. They were the only wounds she kept; the only ones she didn’t use her Crest to get rid of.

Again, she tried the manoeuvre she had seen that assassin use, but her footwork was no better and she found herself stumbling.

“Dammit!” She cursed.

“You know, getting frustrated won’t help you any.” A voice said from the doorway, startling Eve out of her skin.

“Milord.” She said, straightening her posture when she recognised the figure who stood there watching her.

“Please, I’m not my father.” He laughed, pushing himself off from where he was leaning against the door frame to walk towards her. “Anyways, what are you doing in the training grounds so late at night.”

“Lord Rodrigue gave me permission to train.” Eve dipped her head, avoiding his eyes. “I only do it at night, though, when I won’t be bothering anyone.”

“I know.” He gave her an amused smile as he came to stand before her. “I’ve been watching you.”

“Milord?” Eve’s head snapped up, meeting his eyes with panic in her own.

She had thought she had been careful about being seen—especially by Rodrigue’s sons.

“Again,” he huffed, “not my father. Just call me Glenn.”

“Glenn.” She said, still looking directly into his eyes.

“Funny,” he turned away to look at nothing in particular, “I have no memory of you until very recently when I noticed you sneaking out here at night. Now I see you all over the grounds.”

“I’m not surprised you never noticed me.” Eve couldn’t help the bitter huff that escaped her lips.

It was part of why she survived like this—nobles didn’t care about those beneath them. Back when Rodrigue was Glenn’s age, he hadn’t noticed her either. It wasn’t until his father introduced them and explained to Rodrigue the nature of her service to House Fraldarius that he started to actually see her.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Glenn frowned, returning his gaze to her.

“You’re a twenty-year-old, Crest-bearing heir to a noble house.” Eve quirked an eyebrow up at him. “It comes as no surprise that you wouldn’t pay attention to a servant.”

“But see, now.” Glenn took a step closer to Eve, coming dangerously close to her. “Now, all I _can_ pay attention to is you.”

Eve laughed and turned to return her training sword to its rightful place as an excuse to move out of close proximity with Glenn. He was an adult and had been a knight for five years already, so it was only a matter of time before she and him would be formally introduced. But still, Eve wasn’t keen on getting too close to him before that time came.

“I’m serious.” Glenn followed after her, snatching her wrist and turning her to face him. “Tell me your name.”

“Eve, Milord.” She answered him bluntly, using his title to further distance herself from him.

“Heh, stubborn.” Glenn laughed with a wide grin. “I like that.”

“You best return to your chambers.” Eve removed herself from his grip as she spoke. “You’re meant to be travelling with Lord Rodrigue to Gautier territory in the morning.”

“Not until you tell me, Eve, what it is you’re training for.” Glenn moved to stand in front of Eve when she made to walk around him. “What does a servant girl need to train so hard for?”

“I simply prefer to be prepared for the worst-case scenario.” Eve answered curtly, moving once again to walk around Glenn and towards the exit.

“And what would that be?” He asked, voice low as he turned to grab her shoulder roughly.

He pulled her back, forcing Eve to stumble into his chest where he made to wrap his arms around her.

But Eve was too quick, ducking down before he could get his arms around her. As she dropped down, she brought out one of her legs and turned so that she knocked his legs out from under him in one fell swoop.

“Nobles who think they can put their hands on me without my consent.” Eve answered his question, looking down at where he had been knocked flat onto his back.

She knew that the worst to come from his would be a stern talking to by Rodrigue. And even then, it would probably just result in Glenn being told the truth about who she was.

To her surprise, Glenn burst out laughing—a hearty guffaw that echoed in the hall.

“You are the most interesting being I think I’ve ever met, Eve.” He grinned at her when he finally recovered enough to sit up.

“If only you knew.” She smirked at him, offering her hand and pulling him up to his feet.

Suddenly, a loud and persistent knocking rang in Eve’s ears. She blinked, startled as she looked around for the sound that seemed like it was coming from inside her head. Looking at Glenn, he seemed unaffected by the noise that only grew in volume.

“Eve!”

All of a sudden, Eve was in her bed in Garreg Mach, sheets strewn about and a frantic looking Dedue in her doorway. From what she could tell by the sky outside her door, it was just beginning to be dawn.

“What…?” She looked around, still dazed from her dream.

It had felt so real. Eve had genuinely felt like she had been sent back into the past to that fateful night when she and Glenn truly met for the first time. And now here in Garreg Mach, in a world where Glenn no longer existed, everything seemed to lose its colour.

“We need to go, now.” Dedue said, rushing in and tossing Eve’s uniform at her.

“What’s going on?” She asked, still not fully acclimated to being awake.

“The situation in Remire has gotten worse.” Dedue explained. “We need to leave right away. His Highness is already preparing your horse.”

“We’re leaving now?” She asked, collecting the garments Dedue had tossed onto her bed.

“Yes.” He answered curtly. “Get ready as quickly as you can.”

Eve nodded as he shut the door behind him, gone as quickly as he had come.

She rushed to put on her uniform and grabbed her weapons as she was running out the door to the stables. There, she met with the rest of the Blue Lion’s class. Most of them seemed like they too had just been sleeping before hurriedly coming out.

Dedue and Ferdinand were the last to join their group, having been the ones the Professor sent out to gather everyone else.

Byleth explained to the group that the situation in Remire had gotten exponentially worse seemingly overnight. Her father and some of the knights had already set out and they were to meet them in the village when they arrived.

“How much worse, Professor?” Ingrid asked as she mounted her pegasus.

“We don’t know.” Byleth’s eyes were dark with anger. “There are reports of villagers killing one another, though.”

Ingrid swallowed at that. No one else had any other words to say as they silently set out for Remire village.

Nothing could have prepared them, though, for what awaited them there. After travelling as quickly as possible and eventually catching up with the knights, the Blue Lions were stunned silent by the scene before them.

“Goddess…” Eve muttered as she and the others dismounted to gather at the entrance of the village.

“Kill! Kill! Ahhhh!”

“Help! Somebody, please help!”

Screams of men, women, and children alike filled the air that was painted scarlet by blood and fire.

“What's going on here...” Captain Jeralt’s face was pale as he looked around at the chaos.

Eve looked over to see Dimitri seemingly struggling with something, his teeth gritted together as he shook his head.

“Are you okay?” Byleth seemed to notice as well, turning to the prince with concern.

“I... Don't worry about me. I'm fine.” Dimitri said, though his voice was tight. “Don't waste your time on me. Saving the village is far more important. We haven't a moment to lose!”

“What can we do amidst such confusion?” Dedue asked what everyone else was thinking.

“We'll have to take up arms against the villagers who are rampaging. If we strike carefully, it should be possible to spare their lives.” Felix said with a glance towards Eve that she couldn’t decipher.

He looked almost… smug?

“Oh dear... Isn't there a more peaceful way to deal with this?” Mercedes asked with a furrowed brow.

“No matter how long it takes, we'll need to check and rescue them all, one at a time.” Ingrid said with determination.

“Those who have gone mad may be victims themselves. Is it possible to save them?” Ashe cut in with worry in his eyes.

“Well, saving the poor people who aren't crazy is definitely our top priority!” Annette answered. “Let's get on with it!”

“Slow down, Annette.” It was Sylvain, surprisingly, who reached out to grab her shoulder as if to stop her from charging in head-first. “It won't do anyone any good if we panic and get injured ourselves.”

“Isn't that...” Dedue muttered, squinting out at the horizon. “Your Highness. Suspicious figures spotted in the village. They seem to be...watching the chaos.”

“Are they the ones responsible for this madness?” Dimitri’s voice suddenly took on a quality none of them had ever heard before. “If so...it's clear what must be done. Kill them all. Don't let a single one of them escape. Sever their limbs and crush their wicked skulls!”

“Dimitri!” Eve blinked at him, stunned by his words.

Was this the boar that Felix talked about, the person he believed Dimitri truly was?

“These evil dastards won’t get away with this.” He growled with a fire in his eyes Eve had never seen. “I will quench my blade with the blood of those responsible for this.”

“We save the villagers first.” Eve grabbed his wrist roughly, looking directly into his wild eyes.

So this was what hid beneath those smiles and those polite words. This was the Boar Prince.

Eve could tell that this Dimitri was different than the one she had come to know at the monastery. She had always known that there was a darkness that lurked beneath the surface of his princely façade, but she had never expected such a drastic change of character.

Of course, she could understand why the mayhem before them would trigger Dimitri like this. The fire, the screams, the death and carnage—she had lived through war like this before. And she could only imagine that what was unfolding before them now was not dissimilar from what Dimitri had experienced in Duscur.

But this wasn’t who he was, regardless of what Felix said or believed. Eve could tell that this also wasn’t who Dimitri was. He wasn’t some animal that only thirsted for blood. She could tell when they saved a villager and the darkness lifted from Dimitri’s eyes. He had bid the villager safety as they escaped the village, hope spreading in his features as he saved yet another life.

That light only lasted for a fleeting moment, however, before Dimitri’s untapped rage took hold once more.

Eve tried her best to keep up with him, fighting at his side and trying to reign him in. This only became increasingly difficult with the more carnage that they saw. When the Death Knight appeared before them, surrounded by mages, it was all Eve could do to stop Dimitri from charging headfirst into his death.

“Leave him!” Eve grabbed Dimitri’s arm roughly, pulling him back. “There are still villagers that need our help.”

“If he is the one responsible for this…” Dimitri growled, eyes darkened with anger.

“Then we will deal with him _after_ we save the villagers.” Eve hissed.

Thankfully, Dimitri didn’t push the issue. Eve guessed that he still had enough of his head to understand her point. But she wondered for how much longer he could keep his wits about him. The further they pushed through Remire Village, the more death they came across.

As they neared the Death Knight and his mages, Dimitri and Eve came across a villager who had been cornered by the enemy forces. He was cowering in fear, a mysterious mage posed above him. Just as the mage was readying an attack spell, Dimitri ran him through with his lance.

“Yuri!” Eve called out to their closest comrade as she pulled the frightened villager to his feet. “He’s hurt badly and I’m not strong enough with healing magic to help.”

“I can patch him up enough to get him to a healer.” Yuri said as he took the man from her arms. “You should go reign in your prince.”

At Yuri’s words, Eve whipped around to see Dimitri repeatedly driving his lance into the mage he had just disposed of. There was a crazed look in his eye as he brought his lance up to once more send it down into the corpse of his enemy.

“Dimitri!” Eve grabbed his arm as he moved to stab the mage once more.

“He has to pay for what he’s done.” Dimitri’s voice was guttural, almost animalistic to Eve’s ears.

“He’s dead, Dimitri!” She shouted, roughly pulling his arm so he had to turn and face her. “He’s dead.”

With a blink, Dimitri was back to something closer to his usual self. He seemed confused, lost, as if he was completely unaware of what had just transpired.

“We have to join with the others.” Eve tugged at his arm once more to demand his attention. “Forget the Death Knight.”

“The one giving orders to the others…” Dimitri trailed off as he looked over to the central hill their other classmates were making their way towards. “Isn’t that Tomas, the librarian?”

Eve turned to look where Dimitri’s gaze had turned. She hadn’t interacted with him much since coming to the monastery, but Eve was sure Dimitri was right. The one leading all of the mayhem was none other than Tomas.

“Tomas!” Dimitri called out as the two of them ran closer. “What are you doing here?”

By now, the rest of the Blue Lions had drawn closer and they were surrounding Tomas and his group of mages that surrounded him.

“I am not Tomas.” The librarian cackled. “My name is Solon, the saviour of all!”

Before their very eyes, Tomas transformed from the kindly old man they all knew him to be into something that could hardly be described as human.

“What's the matter? So shocked you can't even speak?” The being that had once been Tomas taunted. “You were so easily fooled by my disguise… I was hiding away in Garreg Mach to get the blood of that little girl called Flayn. With her blood, we'll be one step closer to realizing our goal.”

“What is your goal here?” It was Byleth who stepped forward, brandishing the Sword of the Creator in threat.

“Ah, the cursed Fell Star.” Solon regarded the Professor with something between amusement and contempt. “This will be a fine opportunity to measure your power.”

“Was that all this was?” Dimitri’s anger burst forth once more as he charged Solon and his forces.

With no other choice, Byleth commanded the rest of her class to follow suit. With the sheer numbers the Blue Lions made with the reinforcements from the Knights of Seiros, it didn’t take long for them to overwhelm Solon’s forces.

“Why have you gone after this village?” It was Jeralt who made it to Solon first, grabbing him roughly by the front of his tunic to question him. “What are you planning?”

“Heh, I could have conducted this experiment on any test subjects.” Solon smirked. “Now that I have what I came for, I must bid you farewell.”

With that, Solon teleported away along with the Death Knight and the rest of their forces.

“Wait!” Jeralt shouted at the air in frustration. “Damn it, he’s gone…”

“I… will survey the village.” Dimitri’s voice cracked as he spoke. He seemed exhausted and worn. “There may still be some survivors.”

“I’ll go with you.” Eve said softly, following after Dimitri as he turned away from the others.

They walked together in silence, Eve several paces behind Dimitri. She didn’t speak, knowing that in a time like this there were no words that would be helpful. But she also hadn’t wanted to leave him completely alone.

“Now that you know what I truly am, can you still stand to marry me?” Dimitri asked suddenly as they looked through the rubble.

“What you truly are?” Eve’s brow furrowed.

“I regret showing that side of myself to everyone.” Dimitri said with his back still turned to her. “I try to keep my emotions at bay, but today the darkness simply took over me.”

“Dimitri…” Eve stepped towards him, hand hovering as she decided whether or not to reach out and grab him.

But before she could make up her mind or say the words that were on her lips, a spell whizzed by both of their heads. The both of them ducked, turning towards where the spell had come from.

“There!” A mage in a dark cloak was pointing towards them with several other mages gathering. “It’s the Faerghus Prince and his fiancée!”

“Run!” Eve was the first to react, roughly grabbing Dimitri by the wrist and pulling him after her as she ran towards the woods that surrounded the village.

“Don’t let them get away!”

She could hear the mages shouting after them, various spells being throw their way. It was all she could do to keep upright as she and Dimitri ran through the winding growth of the unfamiliar forest.

“We’re not going to lose them, Eve!” Dimitri shouted at her as they ran, ducking out of the way of a spell.

“We can’t take them on either.” Eve risked a glance backwards to see the near dozen mages on their trail.

By now, they were probably well separated from the class. And since everyone thought they were out looking for survivors, no one would question them being away for so long. As it stood, Eve and Dimitri had no hope of reinforcements and they were in no position to stand their ground and fight.

“What can we do then?” Dimitri asked, stumbling over a tree root.

“I’ve got something.” Eve said with another glance back. “But there’s no guarantee it’ll work.”

“What do you mean?” Dimitri dodged another spell as he shouted.

“It’s something Claude gave me.” Eve explained, wrenching a pouch from off of her belt. “He said if I hit it with Fire, it should explode in mist and smoke.”

“Should?” Dimitri asked.

“We haven’t tested it yet.” Eve shook her head. “Only one way to find out, though.”

With that, she tossed the pouch into the air behind them and cast a fire spell towards it. To Claude’s credit, it did in fact explode into a cloud of smoke between Dimitri and Eve and the mages. However, whatever he put in it must have been much stronger than intended because it also set off with a rather loud burst.

Eve’s ears were ringing, and she struggled to keep herself from being disoriented. Frantically, she once again grabbed Dimitri’s wrist to pull him along as she made a sharp turn. She could hear the mages coughing and sputtering behind her but didn’t dare look back.

“In here.”

It was Dimitri who spotted the dilapidated shed that stood next to the remnants of what must have once been a small house. The structure was small, but all four of its walls and its roof were still intact which was all they could hope for at the moment.

“Quiet.” Eve urged as she shut the door behind them.

Neither one had bargained for how little space there actually was in the shed, both of them having to stoop so as not to hit their heads. But after several minutes of holding their breath and listening for any sign of their pursuers, Dimitri and Eve were sure they were in the clear.

“We should head out.” Dimitri said from where he had folded himself as deeply into the furthest corner from Eve as he possibly could.

“That’s not a good idea.” Eve shook her head in response. “Night will be upon us soon and we don’t know these woods. It would be foolish to go bumbling around in the dark and risk crossing paths with those mages again.”

“I suppose you’re right.” Dimitri swallowed thickly.

“Besides, we have shelter here that can keep us from the elements for the night.” Eve said. “We can head back to the village in the morning.”

Dimitri simply nodded, sinking down to sit on the dirt floor of the shed with his knees pressed to his chest. Eve watched him warily as one might watch an unpredictable animal. She was worried about him; she was worried about how he might react to his own actions back in the village.

Still watching him closely, Eve also sank down to sit on the floor of the shed. With both of them sitting, there wasn’t much room that wasn’t occupied by their bodies. Eve’s knee brushed against Dimitri’s shin as she crossed her legs and he flinched away at the contact.

“I apologise.” Dimitri started up once again. “I never should have lost my composure like that.”

“You had every right to lose your composure.” Eve comforted, scooting closer to the prince.

“You did not lose your composure.” Dimitri looked at her with pained eyes that were fighting so hard to hold back the darkness.

“But perhaps I should have.” Eve sighed. “You should not have to apologise for having a human reaction.”

“That was no human reaction.” Dimitri’s breath was shaky, his hands trembling as he held them out in front of him.

“I am a monster, a beast.”

Eve opened her mouth to retort but was only cut off.

“I am exactly the boar that Felix believes me to be.”

Dimitri was now breathing rapidly, his chest heaving even more than it had been after their escape from the mages. Eve was now kneeling beside him, hands balled into fists on top of her legs as she struggled to think of something she could do for him.

He was panicked and scared, and Eve had no idea how she could help him.

“If you are to marry me, I will be sure to destroy your life.” Dimitri shook his head wildly. “Of course you would never choose someone like me. How could anyone choose someone like me?”

His voice had now taken on a hysterical quality that was frightening to Eve. And though she knew it to be cruel of her, she reached out to grab his trembling hand and place it on her cheek.

“I’m here, Dimitri.” She pleaded, pressing her cheek into his palm. “Look at me. I am not afraid of you.”

Eve knew how much value Dimitri placed in physical contact—how much he craved it. She knew if there was any way she could calm him down it would have to be like this. Despite having just admitted to being in love with his childhood friend, she needed to exploit Dimitri’s love for her to get him to calm down.

“You cannot hurt me, Dimitri.” Eve soothed, still holding her own hand over his that cupped her cheek. “You are not a monster. You are not a beast. You are my fiancée and you have saved my life.”

“Do…” Dimitri’s breathing calmed slightly as he looked into her eyes and his thumb gently caressed her cheek. “Do you truly mean that?”

“Every word.” Eve nodded, leaning further into his touch.

She knew it wasn’t fair—not to him, not to Felix. But what else was she to do? Eve knew she could distract Dimitri from his inner turmoil with hope of love and affection.

“If someone like you can stand to be touched by someone like me…” Dimitri trailed off, eyes fixated on Eve’s face. “You may just very well be akin to the Goddess.”

“It doesn’t take a Goddess to see the light in you, Dimitri.” Eve sighed, happy to see that Dimitri seemed to have calmed down slightly.

Perhaps this was to be her role. Even if she could never love him in return, Eve could be Dimitri’s anchor. If he was ever to lose his composure again, she would be there to keep his head level

She would hold his hand, caress his cheek, tell him she loved him if that’s what it took. Eve was willing to go down in Faerghus history as the most doting queen if that was what it took to keep her King sane.

“You should try to get some rest, Dimitri.” Eve said softly, letting her hand drop from where she held his to her cheek. “I can take first watch.”

“Normally I would protest,” Dimitri let his hand linger on her face for a moment longer, “however I fear I am too exhausted to be able to be of any use keeping watch.”

Eve watched as he reluctantly withdrew his hand from her face. His eyes looked forlorn until they suddenly looked frantic and terrified.

“What have I done…” Dimitri’s voice was shaky, breathy, as he stared at her cheek.

“Dimitri?” Eve felt her heart racing as she struggled to figure out what had made him snap once more.

“I have bloodied you.” He muttered. “Curse these blood-stained hands. Am I incapable of doing anything other than marring the lives of those around me?”

Confused, Eve brought her own hand up to her cheek. When she pulled her fingers away, she saw they were stained with blood. Dimitri must have had blood on his glove that she had held to her cheek and it was now drying on her skin.

“It’s okay, Dimitri.” Eve tried to soothe as he began to shake.

“You have to tell Lady Rhea to find someone else. I will only bloody your life, Eve.” Dimitri was muttering some nonsense or another, eyes unfocused and terrified.

“Dimitri!” Eve called his name repeatedly, the sound falling on deaf ears. “Dimitri, please.”

Unable to get him to focus on her voice or her face, Eve took Dimitri’s face in her own hands.

“Dimitri Alexandre!” She all but shouted, pulling his face forward until it was mere millimetres away from her own.

For a moment, something like clarity seemed to fill Dimitri’s eyes. But just as quickly as it came, that look was replaced by something else—something Eve couldn’t place.

At least, she couldn’t place it until he was moving forward to close the gap between them.


	39. Thirty-Eight

Dimitri leaned forward until Eve lost her balance and fell flat on her back. Her hands were still holding his face as he leaned over her with his hands caging her in on either side of her head.

“Dimitri.”

Her voice was just a whisper. They were so close now that he could feel her breath on his lips as she spoke his name.

Suddenly, he was transported back to the day they arrived at the monastery together. She had said his name in much the same way; flat, not a question but a statement. There was no malice, no care, no emotion—just simply his name.

And all of a sudden, he felt an overwhelming sadness that she would say his name in this way after all they had been through. It was as if she were speaking to him as a stranger once more. They had spent months together, though to Dimitri they had felt like years. He had grown to know her, or so he thought, and she had grown to know him.

But of course she would look at him as if he were a stranger now. The way he had been acting ever since they arrived in Remire was unlike himself—or at least the version of himself that he presented to Eve.

“Would it make you feel better?” She breathed, seemingly unphased by their proximity. She didn’t shy away from him, didn’t try to push him away.

“What?” Dimitri’s voice was hoarse, why was it hoarse?

“If you kissed me.” Eve’s eyes bore directly into his. “Would it make you feel better?”

“I will not touch you unless you ask it of me.” Dimitri said slowly, regaining both his mind and the memory of the promise he made to her.

“I’m telling you it’s okay.” Eve said. She was looking right at him and yet Dimitri felt like she was so far away.

“Telling me it is okay and asking me to are two very different things.” Dimitri shook his head, finally having enough sense to pull away from Eve and sit upright again.

“If I ask you to kiss me would it make you feel better?” Eve asked in that same empty, distant voice as she sat up too.

It made Dimitri wonder how many times she had done this. How many times had Eve simply become the person other people needed her to be? She was so quick to recede into herself and let some blank slate take the forefront. It was as if she were presenting Dimitri with a new version of herself for him to shape into the person he needed her to be.

And though some part of him found this a touching display of her affection for him, her actions mostly filled him with an overwhelming sadness. Perhaps Eve had never been honest with him about who she was because she no longer knew herself. The real Eve was buried somewhere under layers of Eves that she had fabricated for the people who relied on her.

“No.” Dimitri finally said, suddenly aware of how parched his mouth was. “I want you to ask me someday when it is something you truly want; not when it is something you think I want.”

“And if that never happens?” Eve cocked her head to the side curiously.

“Then I will never touch you.” Dimitri said firmly though if it was to convince her or himself, he wasn’t too sure.

“Can you be satisfied with that?” She pressed.

“I cannot speak to whether I will be happy or satisfied with that arrangement.” Dimitri shook his head. “But my satisfaction is not the only thing that matters in our lives.”

“Our…” Eve mused, seemingly interested by something he had said.

She let the silence linger between the two of them as Dimitri thought back on his deplorable actions. He owed everyone an apology when they returned to the monastery. But most of all, he owed Eve an apology.

“I am so deeply sorry to have put you through all of this.” Dimitri said shamefully. “I never should have acted in such a way.”

“You’re a young man, still just a boy.” Eve said softly, regaining some of her inflection in her voice. “I don’t fault you for giving in to your emotions.”

“I have no time to be a boy.” Dimitri frowned. “I need to be a man, a king. I have to be someone who can lead the Holy Kingdom of Faerghus.”

“Not with me you don’t.” Eve replied with something in her eyes Dimitri couldn’t place.

And though her expression confused him, Dimitri found himself relieved by it. Her words, her voice, her cryptic eyes were all hers once more. She was the Eve he had fallen in love with, not the Eve who was waiting to be told who to be.

“I don’t need a king; I don’t need anything from you.” Eve continued. “So, if you’re going to lose your composure or give in to your impulses, do it with me.”

“I cannot ask you to endure that side of me again.” Dimitri shook his head.

“You’re not.” Eve cut in before he could say anything more. “If I am to have any say in it, I don’t want to marry the King of Faerghus… I want to marry Dimitri.

“If you truly mean that,” Dimitri swallowed nervously, “then will you allow me a moment of weakness for the time being?”

“Of course.” Eve nodded. “It is just us here.”

“Will you…” Dimitri trailed off, blushing at the notion of what he was going to ask Eve. “Would you allow me to lean on you? Just for a moment while I rest?”

* * *

Eve softened at Dimitri’s timid expression as he looked at her expectantly. He looked as if he fully anticipated her to refuse his request and push him away. And a part of her wondered if that was the better course of action.

But Eve also saw how small he looked in that moment. He looked like a boy, begging to be held and loved and told everything would be okay. Could she deny him this when he needed it most?

“Come.” Eve motioned as she moved to sit beside him with her back against the wall. “Rest your head upon my shoulder.”

“Are you sure?” Dimitri asked as if he hadn’t been the one to request it in the first place.

“I’m asking you.” Eve said, gently bringing her hand up to coax his head onto her shoulder.

Once he was settled, Eve gently brushed his hair out of his face before reaching down to grab his hand in her own. He stiffened at the contact but didn’t protest.

_In time’s flow_

_See the glow_

_Of flames ever burning bright_

Eve sang softly the lullaby her mother used to sing to her when she was little, rubbing small circles with her thumb on the back of Dimitri’s hand. He seemed to still be rather on edge, but Eve noticed a difference in his demeanour.

“Please.” Dimitri pleaded softly when she finished her song. “Could you sing just a little longer?”

“Of course.” Eve replied, leaning to rest her head upon his before resuming her singing.

It was not long before Dimitri’s breathing steadied and his posture slumped even further into Eve’s side. And as she continued to rub circles on the back of Dimitri’s hand, Eve found herself succumbing to her own exhaustion as well.

She fought her heavy eyelids as best she could, trying to stay awake so she could keep watch for those mages that had chased them there. But soon Eve was lulled to sleep by the sound of Dimitri’s soft breathing and the heat of his body against hers.

When Eve awoke, she found herself in an unfamiliar bed in an even more unfamiliar room. It was dark save for the fire that still blazed in its hearth on the other side of the room. And as Eve’s eyes trailed over to the warm glow, her gaze landed on the figure beside her in the bed.

She had seen many people who were peaceful and beautiful sleepers, but Eve had never seen someone who looked so chaotic in their sleep. He had one arm thrown above his head with the other dangling off the side of the bed. He had also managed to end up half entwined in the covers and half outside of them. His long hair was strewn about with some of it even stuck to the corners of his agape mouth.

And then there was the snoring.

Eve might have laughed if she hadn’t been filled with a chilling dread the moment she realised where she was and with whom.

Silently, she slid out from under the covers, the cold air suddenly bringing to her attention that she was fully nude. Her clothes were strewn about on the floor and she padded on silent feet to collect them and redress herself.

“Where do you think you’re going?” An amused voice came from the bed and Eve snapped up from where she was bent to grab her undershirt.

“I shouldn’t be here.” She whispered in response, hurriedly putting on her undershirt to shield her body from his eyes that were doing a leisurely sweep up her form.

“Come back to bed.” He hummed. “It’s not even dawn yet.”

“I will not.” Eve answered tersely as she finally put on the rest of her clothing.

“What’s wrong?” His amused smile was gone now, replaced by a concerned frown as he propped himself up on his elbow to look at her.

She wanted nothing more than to return to bed and kiss the space where his eyebrows knitted together, but she knew better. She should have known better the night before.

“Hey.” He was out of bed now, holding her wrist to prevent her from leaving his chambers.

“This was a mistake.” Eve said as levelly as she could.

“What the hell are you talking about ‘a mistake’?” He was angry now.

“I never should have let things get this out of hand, I apologise.” Eve bowed her head and moved to pull away from his grasp.

“Nothing is out of hand.” He tightened his hold on her wrist and pulled her closer to him. “Now come back to bed and stop this madness.”

“I can’t do that Milord.” Eve looked to the side to avoid his eyes, knowing she would only find rage in them.

“Milord?” He scoffed. “After all this time, all this build-up of whatever is going on between us and you’re going to hit me with a ‘Milord’?”

“I’ve had my fun.” Eve could feel his gaze burning into her, but still she refused to look at him. “But I’m just a servant and it’s time I remember my place.”

“I don’t believe that.” He gripped her chin roughly, forcing her to look at him. “What’s really going on?”

“What’s really going on is this was a mistake!” Eve ripped her chin out of his hand, taking a step back from him. “You have a fiancée, Glenn.”

“Who’s a child.” He rolled his eyes. “Do you think you’re the first person I’ve enjoyed physical pleasures with regardless of my engagement?”

“I’m older than you.” Eve blurted.

“By two years.” Glenn frowned.

“Your father will be furious with me if he finds out.” Eve said, trying to throw out any excuse she could think of.

“My dad?” Glenn laughed. “Babe, I mean this in the nicest way, but I don’t think my dad would so much as know your name.”

“Excuse me?” Eve grimaced.

“You said it yourself: nobles don’t notice servants.” Glenn shrugged.

“Have you not realised that I am literally always by your father’s side?” Eve looked incredulously at him. “When he travels, I am the only servant he brings with him. I am your father’s attendant; if anyone knows me in this house, it’s Rodrigue.”

“Rodrigue? Since when were you so chummy with my father?” It was Glenn’s turn to grimace. “You’re always ‘Milord’ this and ‘Lord Fraldarius’ that, why drop the formalities all of a sudden?”

“I’m not having this conversation with you.” Eve shook her head. “This was a mistake, I apologise. This ends here.”

“I don’t accept that.” Glenn pulled her back once more by her wrist, tightening his grip. “All of this wasn’t a mistake. You and I have a connection, you can’t deny that. There’s no one else who I can talk to the way I talk with you. You’re interesting and kind and dutiful. You’ve taught me things I never would have learned otherwise. And now you’re going to say all of that was a mistake over one night?”

“The mistake was coming to your room last night.” Eve sighed. “All those training sessions, those conversations—I could convince myself we were just friends and nothing more. But last night made it something much more real that never should have happened.”

“But why not?” Glenn asked, a hurt confusion in his eyes. “Because I’m engaged? Because I’m a noble and you’re not? Because my father would disapprove? Because you’re just two years older than me?”

“I’m not two years older than you, I’m a thousand and four years older than you!” Eve blurted in exasperation, only realising what she had said once the words had left her lips.

Why had she done that? She had never told anyone the truth unintentionally, even in a moment of panic or hurt. Eve could tell herself that Glenn was going to know eventually regardless, but she knew that she would have done the same whether or not that was the case. For some reason, she cared that much for this Fraldarius boy.

“So it was you.” Glenn said, suddenly very sombre.

“What?” Eve was surprised by his response.

“I kept having this dream of a girl just like you at my mother’s funeral.” His eyes were searching hers, but for what she didn’t know. “After the burial, I went to find my father and he was weeping into the arms of someone who looked just like you.”

Glenn’s grasp on her wrist loosened and he instead brought his hand up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear.

“I always thought it was some distant relative I saw him with, your hair is so much like ours.” Glenn continued softly. “But I started having this dream lately and for some reason I was convinced it was you. I always thought it didn’t make sense because you were as you are now. How old are you?”

“I… am a thousand and twenty-four years.” Eve whispered, unsure of why she was answering him honestly.

“You’ve always served my family, haven’t you?” Glenn asked gently.

“Not always.” Eve shook her head. “But I have served this house for generations.”

“Does my father…?” Glenn trailed off his own question before laughing lightly. “Of course he knows, that’s why you’re his attendant.”

“Do you understand now why I said this was a mistake?” Eve asked, cocking her head to the side.

“No.” Glenn answered bluntly.

“Glenn!” Eve blinked in shock.

“So what you’re a thousand years old or whatever?” Glenn shrugged. “I doubt you’re gonna find anyone who’s actually your age. As I see it, we’re both adults who are willing and able.”

“It’s not just about that, Glenn!” Eve shook her head. “There’s so much more to it. There’s a reason I don’t age, a reason I serve your family, a reason your family protects me. And with all of that playing a part, you have to understand why this stops now.”

“No, it doesn’t.” Glenn said, his assured demeanour was somehow both infuriating and oddly reassuring for Eve. “Because if you really wanted this to stop here and now, you wouldn’t have said anything. You told me the truth, a dangerous truth. And that means you feel this connection just the same as I do.”

“You don’t understand, Glenn.” Eve huffed, though her heart felt like it was being pulled towards the man before her.

“Then make me understand.” Glenn said firmly. “You know me, you know how stubborn I am. If you say there’s too much at play that makes this impossible, then I need to know what those things are. I won’t accept that we can’t be together unless you tell me exactly why.”

“That’s not fair.” Eve grimaced, crossing her arms.

“You know I don’t play fair, Eve.” Glenn grinned.

* * *

Eve awoke the next morning, truly this time, confused and groggy. By the light filtering through the cracks in the shed wall, she reckoned it was just past sunrise. The two of them had survived the night. And judging by Dimitri’s sleeping form, he had survived his demons that had haunted him the day prior.

“Dimitri.” Eve said softly, pushing back the bittersweet feeling her dream had left her with to focus on what was before her now.

“Eve?” Dimitri stirred, looking around sleepily. “Is it morning already?”

“We need to get back to the village in case the knights are waiting for us there.” Eve whispered as he blinked back the sleep in his eyes.

Dimitri nodded silently, stiffly standing up and taking hold of his lance that was leaning against the wall. In kind, Eve also stood and checked that her own weapons were still in their rightful place at her hip.

It was fairly easy for them to find the direction of Remire village in the morning sun. For better or worse, the village seemed to still be smoking from the fires the day before which gave the two of them a clear indication of where to go.

They walked silently, no words exchanged about the battle or what had transpired the night before. Neither one said anything about how far they had managed to run from the village or that it was highly likely their friends thought they were dead.

It wasn’t until they were nearing the edge of the forest that Dimitri finally spoke.

“Did you mean what you said last night?” He cleared his throat.

“About what?” Eve kept her eyes ahead rather than turning to look at him.

“That you would rather marry me than the King of Faerghus?” He clarified. “That you would allow me to be vulnerable around you.”

“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it.” Eve replied simply.

“Forgive me, but you say a lot of things you don’t mean.” Dimitri retorted rather easily.

It almost made Eve grin at the prospect that he would be so open as to argue with her.

“That is fair.” Eve conceded. “But yes, I did mean it.”

“Then I will try my best to be—”

“No.” Eve cut Dimitri off suddenly, turning to stand in front of him. “The whole point was I don’t want you to _try_ to be anything.”

“I do not know what you mean.” Dimitri frowned.

“I don’t need anything from you, Dimitri.” Eve sighed. “I don’t need you to try to be the Dimitri you think I want. Just be whatever you need to be around me. If that means you’re violent like you were in the village or kind and tender like you are when we have tea, it doesn’t matter to me. I’ll take whatever just as long as it’s genuinely you.”

“You say things like this and yet you wonder why I have fallen in love with you.” Dimitri sighed with a smile though his eyes held a certain sadness.

“We should keep going.” Eve said, swiftly turning away so that she wouldn’t have to face those sad eyes.

“Would you do the same?” Dimitri asked her back as she walked away.

“Do what?” Eve asked without looking back.

“Would you allow yourself to be more vulnerable, more candid with me?” Dimitri asked.

“You know I won’t.” Eve sighed.

“And yet that answer is astonishingly candid.” Dimitri mused as they stepped out of the foliage and back into Remire village.

The two of them surveyed the town as they walked through. Though in ruin after the battle before, things seemed to be much calmer now. There was no more fighting and it seemed the Knights of Seiros had deemed the situation under control enough for them to leave.

While Dimitri spoke to the residents to glean what information he could about their ability to weather the winter in their condition, Eve managed to procure a horse for a small fee. She had wanted to offer the remainder of the gold she had on her, but the woman refused to take it all. Her son had died in the rampage and the horse had been his; she told Eve that she couldn’t bear to look at it and be reminded of him.

“You’re right, you know.” Eve said after the two of them had set out on the road back to Garreg Mach.

“Am I?” Dimitri asked curiously.

“I don’t seem to lie to you anymore.” Eve said thoughtfully. “Rather than lie, I simply tell you I won’t tell you the truth. I’ve never been that way with anyone before.”

“As much as I wish you would be truthful with me, I am happy you do not lie.” Dimitri said with a slight hint of pride in his voice.

“I would tell you the truth if I could.” Eve said, surprised by her own words.

Would she? Would she willingly tell Dimitri the truth? She knew she would have to tell him some semblance of it in the near future to explain her lack of ageing, but that could be covered with some lie or half-truth.

“What would have to change for you to be able to?” Dimitri asked, sounding genuinely curious but also concerned.

“I don’t think I know…”

But she did. Eve knew that her heart would have to change for her to tell him the truth. She would have to believe that she could protect him and everyone else from the implications the truth held. She had to know that neither her nor Dimitri would face consequences from Rhea or Seteth or the Church. Or she would have to love him as much as she loved Glenn for those stipulations to lose their meaning. But how could she tell him that? How could she tell him the truth if she couldn’t even tell him why she wouldn’t?


	40. Thirty-Nine

Felix cursed his distracted mind as he caught himself once more glancing towards the door to the training grounds. He half expected—fully hoped—to see Eve burst through those doors any moment now.

He refused to believe that Eve had perished back in Remire. She was the best fighter he knew other than the Professor; and he hated to admit, but the boar was also a formidable adversary. There was no way the two of them had been bested.

Besides, she had promised she wouldn’t die on him.

But he couldn’t let his frustration show outwardly. The Professor had ordered the Blue Lions back to the monastery, class had resumed as normal. And though there was a lingering gloom in the training hall, the rest of the class carried on as best they could.

Felix could not let show how worried he was. As far as everyone else was concerned, he and Eve had no particularly strong bond. They trained together, he tolerated her, and that was all. He had already betrayed too much back in Remire when he advocated that they stay in the village until the two missing students could be found.

So it was with immense effort that Felix focused on his training, swinging his training sword at the dummy in front of him. But he could only focus for so much longer before he was distracted once again by some kind of commotion outside.

“Hey, Teach!” It was the loud-mouthed leader of the Golden Deer who burst through the doors with a shout.

“Claude, I’m in the middle of training.” The Professor answered stoically, regarding the interruption with indifference.

“Well, I thought you’d be interested in knowing that word has it your little Prince has returned.” Claude replied with a coy wink before disappearing from where he had come.

Much to Felix’s surprise, the Professor dropped her training weapon and jogged to the doors to peer out curiously.

“So even the Professor was concerned.” Ingrid mused; shocking Felix who hadn’t noticed her come up to his side.

“He didn’t say anything about Eve.” Felix muttered.

“What?” Ingrid turned to Felix with a puzzled look.

“Claude.” Felix reiterated. “He said the boar was back. He didn’t say anything about Eve.”

“What are you two standing around for?” Sylvain came up to the two of them before Ingrid could respond. “The Professor already ran off, let’s go!”

Felix didn’t need any more convincing as he ran off after Sylvain to the entrance of the monastery. All the way there, he cursed his racing heart and the anxious churning in his stomach.

As the three of them came to the top of the steps above the marketplace, Felix thought he might vomit as he saw the boar atop his horse—seemingly alone. But as he drew nearer, Felix could see a pair of arms wrapped around the prince’s waist. He usually despised the sight of those arms wrapped so tightly around the boar, but in this moment, he felt a wave of relief.

Dedue and the Professor were already beside them, both of their usually stoic faces wrought with worry and concern. Felix wanted nothing more than to rush to Eve’s side and make sure she was unharmed, but he knew he couldn’t do that here or now.

“Eve!” It was Sylvain who called out, rushing down to envelope Eve in his arms the moment she came down from their horse.

It was rare Sylvain used her name, and it let Felix know that his seemingly carefree friend had been just as worried about her as he had.

“We were all so worried about you.” Sylvain still hadn’t let go of Eve by the time Felix and Ingrid had walked down to the two of them. “You should’ve seen how hard Fe fought the Professor saying we should stay and look for you guys.”

“Tch! I was just thinking of how much of a pain it would’ve been if the boar prince died and Faerghus was left without a king.” Felix snapped, defensive about his moment of weakness in which he had let his emotions show.

Before he could betray his emotions any further, yet another flash of red hair came barrelling over to envelope Eve in a hug. It was Annette—on the verge of tears—blubbering about how worried she had been.

Felix watched on as the other Blue Lions gathered around Eve to express their relief at her return. Had she always been so beloved by others? When had she formed a bond so close with Ashe that he would be biting back tears as he recounted their reluctance to leave the village? Was she really so acquainted with Balthus that he would envelope her in a bear hug so fiercely that her feet came off the ground as he laughed that he knew she would make it back? For what reason would she be telling Claude that he had been instrumental in her escape?

As he watched on, Felix became overwhelmed by the sinking feeling that he did not know Eve at all. He knew nothing of her relationships with others because he hadn’t cared; he had only ever been focused on her relationship with him. And now he had to watch as Sylvain kept his arm tightly wrapped around Eve’s shoulders while she spoke to them all.

Felix could never stand before the other Blue Lions and hold Eve. He couldn’t grasp her hand as Ferdinand did and have it be seen as platonic. He couldn’t lean his head on hers like Sylvain was doing and not be questioned about it. As much as he wanted to, Felix could not outwardly express his relief at her return until the two of them were alone.

“I’ll allow the two of you to rest.” The Professor stepped into the jovial reunion to address Eve and Dimitri. “After classes this evening I’ll come to collect the two of you and we can report what happened to Seteth.”

“You can’t seriously expect us to go to class right now, Professor.” Sylvain pouted.

“I can and will.” Byleth answered curtly, though after a pause she softened. “…but perhaps we could end our lessons a little earlier today considering the circumstances.”

Sylvain beamed, looking sideways to throw a wink at Eve who regarded him as one might regard a particularly amusing child. And despite himself, Felix found that he wished Eve would regard him in such a way. Not that he wanted to be seen as a child to her, no, but that she could openly display her affections for him in front of the others. He hated the idea of being a secret—of being a second thought, a second choice.

* * *

Eve was beyond exhausted as she and Dimitri walked back from their meeting with Seteth. Explaining to him what had happened had been a nightmare for all parties involved. She never expected him to get angry at the Professor for letting the two of them go off alone. Half of her wondered if perhaps he had been worried she would use the opportunity to disappear and slip out of his and Rhea’s grasp once more.

“Eve.” Dimitri said softly as they came to stand before her door.

“Yes?” She raised an expectant eyebrow, turning to face him.

“Thank you for your kindness last night.” Dimitri said softly, hanging his head. “I’ve been treating you unfairly since we returned from Fraldarius, and yet you showed me not a hint of resentment.”

“ _You’ve_ been treating _me_ unfairly?” Eve asked incredulously.

“You told me the truth and I rewarded you by distancing myself from you and letting my emotions get the better of me.” Dimitri sighed.

“I told you I was in love with a man who isn’t you.” Eve whispered, wary of being overheard. “And you think you’re being unfair to me?”

“I have known since the beginning that you do not love me.” Dimitri also lowered his voice as he spoke. “And I promised you I would not make you endure my affections. Treating you poorly because your heart belongs to someone else is unfair of me.”

“Dimitri, I fail to understand you.” Eve sighed, looking into the prince’s cerulean eyes as if she could find some explanation of his behaviour there. “You think giving me the silent treatment for a couple of days is treating me poorly?”

“I should not lash out at you.” Dimitri frowned.

“I told you I want you to be your genuine self in front of me. If that means you lash out at my erratic behaviour once in a while, then so be it.” Eve said softly, glancing up and away at the moon overhead. “Perhaps it would do me some good to face the consequences of my own actions.”

“You are perhaps one of the most interesting beings I have ever known, Eve.” Dimitri let a small smile tug at the corner of his lips as Eve looked back at him. “Goodnight.”

“What?” Eve breathed, shocked by the words that sounded so much like the ones Glenn had said to her.

“I said goodnight.” Dimitri smiled, mistaking her shocked response for genuine confusion.

“Yes, well…goodnight.” Eve nodded, swallowing the lump in her throat to offer the prince a small smile. “I’ll see you in the morning, Dimitri.”

As usual, Dimitri waited until Eve opened her door and stepped inside before moving to walk away. It was a simple gesture of chivalry, but one he never failed to adhere to whenever he accompanied Eve back to her quarters.

“You told him you loved me?”

A voice from the depths of the shadows of her room scared Eve out of her wits as she closed her door.

“Felix!” She hissed as she whipped around to see the figure hiding in the corner. “You scared me half to death.”

“You want to talk about scared half to death?” He stepped out of the shadows to look fiercely at her.

Eve fully expected Felix to pounce on her the moment he met her eyes. It would not have been unlike him to let his frustrations manifest as physical actions. And the growl in his voice as he spoke along with the severity in his eyes made Eve believe he would descend upon her lips as he often had before.

But instead, he grabbed her hands in his own and crumpled to the floor before her like a repentant sinner.

“I was so scared.” He whispered; his voice wracked with a vulnerability Eve had never seen in him. “And I was angry; you promised me you wouldn’t die on me.”

“And I didn’t.” Eve answered simply, unsure of how to proceed with this version of Felix.

“You can’t die for him.” Felix looked up at her, anger and fear and confusion in his eyes. “You can’t die for a man you don’t even love.”

“What?” Eve frowned as she kneeled down to be level with Felix.

“You went with the boar because you didn’t want him to be alone and you almost died for it.” Felix elaborated. “He’s already taken enough from your life; you can’t let him be the death of you too.”

“Felix…” Eve sighed. “Dimitri hasn’t taken anything from my life. You forget that our arrangement is because he’s helping me.”

“I forget nothing.” Felix grimaced. “If there’s any silver lining to all of this it’s that you’ve finally seen who the boar truly is. Perhaps now you’ll stop giving him so much of your compassion.”

“I think perhaps you and I saw different things in Remire.” Eve said softly, standing slowly and bringing Felix up with her by their intertwined hands.

“Beneath his princely façade he’s an animal—a wild beast with no control over his impulses.” Felix spat.

So that was why he had looked smug back when Dimitri first started to lose control. He had wanted Eve to see the person he thought Dimitri was. Perhaps Felix believed that having her see Dimitri as the Boar Prince would get her to finally abandon her sense of duty to him.

“That’s not what I saw.” Eve gripped Felix’s hands tighter as she sought to find some middle ground in his eyes.

“Then what did you see?” There was more than a little malice in his voice.

“I saw a boy deeply haunted by his past trying to do what he wished he could’ve done to those who killed his loved ones.” Eve sighed. “Is that not why you train so hard too? To become stronger; to become the kind of person who could’ve protected Glenn?”

“Don’t you bring him into this.” Felix’s voice strained and Eve could tell he was fighting to keep his temper under control.

“Felix, I know that Dimitri is not the prince he acts as in front of everyone else. But I also know that he is not the boar you believe him to be.” Eve let go of Felix’s hands, walking several paces over to sit on the edge of her bed.

“Then what is he?” Felix’s brow furrowed.

“I don’t know.” Eve half laughed, half sighed. “Something in between? You are not just your worst moments, and neither is he.”

“Why do you defend him?” Felix moved to stand just before where she sat.

“The same reason I defend you; the same reason I defend Rodrigue or Sylvain.” Eve sighed and looked up at him. “I know the sorrow that lives in all of you. And I know how it affects the way you act.”

For a moment, Felix looked angry. He opened and closed his mouth several times as if to speak but decided against it each time. Finally, he sat down on the edge of the bed beside Eve and leaned his head against her shoulder.

“Can we drop this?” He asked quietly.

“Hm?” Eve turned her head as best she could to look at him.

She was shocked at Felix’s behaviour; he was biting his tongue, keeping his temper at bay, waiting for her to take the lead. He was being so unlike himself that Eve wasn’t sure how to react. Had she frightened him so much with her disappearance? But even then, she would have expected him to lash out in response.

Felix had always been the type to take action ever since he was young. He was never one to sit down and talk through things or process his emotions—everything was a reaction.

“I don’t want to be like this with you.” Felix muttered, seemingly frustrated. “I’ve said it before, but I just can’t control my emotions around you, and I hate it. I want to spend the time we have left before the wedding proving to you that I’m better than the boar.”

“Felix, we can’t just not talk about things that upset you.” Eve’s brow furrowed.

“Why not?” He asked rather bluntly.

“Because I like you as you are.” Eve replied. “I don’t want you biting your tongue because your sharp wit is exactly why I’m drawn to you.”

“But it’s not enough.” Felix stood once more, looking down at Eve fiercely. “I don’t know what to be for you to choose me.”

“I’ve already chosen you, Felix.” Eve frowned.

“But you’re still marrying him.” Felix grimaced. 

“I’m marrying him because I will honour my duty, not because I’ve chosen him.” Eve shook her head lightly.

“Do you have any idea what it feels like?” Felix asked, a mixture of anger and pain in his voice.

When Eve didn’t reply, he continued.

“I always felt like I was second to Glenn.”

Eve was surprised that he would mention his brother by name of his own accord. It had always felt like he avoided bringing Glenn up just like he never addressed Dimitri by name.

“When he was alive, I idolised him. I still think he’s the strongest person I’ve ever met. I’ll be the first to admit that my brother was the most important person in my life. But after Glenn died, it was like my father had no more sons. I was always compared to Glenn, important milestones in my life that my father should have been proud of only made him mourn when he thought of Glenn meeting those same milestones. I have only ever been a replacement for Glenn in my father’s eyes.”

Felix had now started to pace around Eve’s room, unable to stand still as he spoke from the heart for what felt like the first time to Eve.

“And then there’s the boar.” Felix nearly growled in distaste. “My father will sing his praises for the Boar Prince until his voice is gone. He spends half his letters to me wasting ink asking how the boar is doing. My father only cared about Glenn after he died and even then, he’s been more of a father to the boar than anyone else.”

“Your father loves you very much, Felix.” Eve tried to reach for his hand, but he was pacing too quickly. “He always has.”

“Does a great job of showing it.” Felix laughed bitterly.

“Felix, you should know better than most that Fraldarius men are not particularly forthcoming about their emotions.” Eve huffed. “Your father is _trying_.”

“I just-!” Felix cut himself off, pausing to take a breath. “All this to say that I’m tired of feeling like a second choice or a replacement. And even if you’re not choosing the boar over me, you’re still choosing your duty over me.”

“Felix, I…”

But Eve trailed off, suddenly reminded of what Sylvain had asked her upon multiple occasions.

_You loved Glenn enough to go against everything you had lived by. You would have even defied Rodrigue for him. So maybe now is the time to consider if you’d do the same for Felix…_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologise for the impromptu hiatus in between the last update and this one. I've been working a lot of overtime lately and haven't had a chance to write.


	41. Fourty

Eve sent Felix back to his room not long after he had poured his heart out to her. She had never expected him to be so honest about his feelings, and she had wished she hadn’t been quite so exhausted for it.

She hadn’t been able to come up with any fancy words to quell his anxieties or settle his heart. In fact, Eve hadn’t even been able to answer her own anxieties stirring in her chest.

She loved Felix—of this she was sure by this point. But come the end of this moon, she would be Dimitri’s bride. There was no question in Eve’s heart that if Felix had been his brother, she would not go through with the wedding.

Regardless of the consequences, Eve would’ve defied everyone for Glenn.

But the fact that she wouldn’t do that for Felix didn’t mean she didn’t love him. It just wasn’t the same love.

Glenn had felt like an extension of Eve, a natural part of her. Neither one necessarily needed the other, but that was precisely why they got on so well. There were no requirements, no stipulations upon which their relationship depended.

But where Eve has simply loved Glenn, she craved Felix. She relished the way he looked at her which was exactly the same way he looked at everyone. Felix needed Eve because she made him feel superior to the boar; Eve needed Felix because he didn’t blame her for Glenn’s death.

Eve had loved Glenn because they didn’t need anything from each other.

And she loved Felix because they were exactly what they needed for each other.

As Eve pondered this, thinking on the decision she’d have to make before this moon was over, her exhausted mind and body could do nothing but descend into sleep. And once again, she found herself dreaming of days past with Glenn.

* * *

“You can’t keep pulling the same move and expect it to work.” Eve laughed as she disarmed Glenn for what felt like the dozenth time that night. “If it didn’t work the first time, why would it work the next billion attempts?”

“Persistence is key.” Glenn grinned, stepping forward to circle his arms around her waist. “That’s how I pinned you down, isn’t it?”

He stooped down to press a kiss to Eve’s lips, laughter rumbling in his chest that vibrated against Eve’s.

“You are persistent, I’ll give you that.” Eve smiled as Glenn pulled back. “One might even call you stubborn.”

“Well, ‘one’ better be careful who they call stubborn if they want to stay out of trouble.” Glenn’s features took on a mischievous look as he spoke.

Before she could respond, Eve found herself being picked up and slung over Glenn’s shoulder like a sack of wheat. Her training sword clattered to the floor as she lost her grip on it in astonishment.

“Let me down, you oaf!” She laughed, kicking her legs though being careful not to actually strike him.

“Oaf?” Glenn said in mock offence. “You call me stubborn and then you call me an oaf? You wound me!”

“Well, perhaps if you weren’t so stubborn and oafish, you’d let me down!” Eve laughed again.

“As you wish.” Glenn shrugged as he let go of Eve suddenly and allowed for her to fall to the ground heavily.

“Ouch!” Eve cried out, more in surprise than actual pain, as she landed in the dirt of the training hall.

“Are you okay?” Glenn’s playful tone was immediately replaced with concern as he knelt down to examine Eve.

“No.” She grunted, wincing. “I think I hit my head.”

As Glenn leaned in to look at where Eve motioned, worry knitting his brow together, she pounced forward and knocked him onto his back. Straddling his hips, she bent down to kiss him with a mischievous smile of her own.

“You little…” Glenn tried to think of something clever to say but was too busy laughing at Eve’s triumphant face.

“Payback.” She laughed in between peppering his face with kisses.

“Do you have to go tomorrow?” Glenn asked, sobering up though making no attempt to stand.

“You know I do.” Eve smiled sympathetically, reaching down to brush a stray piece of hair from Glenn’s face. “We’re just spending the weekend with the Margrave to sort out what should hopefully be some very short discussions.”

“Hopefully?” Glenn asked. “I thought my father was just responding to a call for aid.”

“Yes and no.” Eve sighed, glancing upward at the skylight from which the stars shone. “The Margrave did request for more Fraldarius men to be sent to the northern border. But the reports we’re getting back describe unfair conditions where Fraldarius troops are being treated as less than compared to Gautier forces. There’s a lack of respect among Gautier men for the military leaders House Fraldarius have provided. Your father is going to tell Margrave Gautier that unless this changes we won’t be sending any more Fraldarius troops. And that if it gets worse, he will be recalling all of his men.”

“Hm, I like hearing you talk about politics.” Glenn hummed with a smile of adoration. “You’re rather clever, aren’t you?”

“I used to be nobility too, you know.” Eve smiled back and leaned forward to place a kiss on the tip of his nose.

“Tell me more about yourself.” Glenn demanded as he sat up, placing his hands firmly on Eve’s hips to keep her upright as he moved.

“Like what?” Eve’s brow furrowed as she shifted in her new position sitting atop Glenn’s thighs.

“I don’t know.” Glenn shrugged. “Something about you that I’d never guess; something astonishing.”

“Astonishing as the fact that I’m a thousand years old?” Eve raised an eyebrow with a smirk.

“You’ve already told me all that magical stuff.” Glenn waved his hand dismissively. “I want to know more about your life. What’s something that would surprise me about your life regardless of your power?”

“I was married.” Eve said pensively after a moment of thought.

“Really?” Glenn feigned casual surprise, but Eve caught the flash of jealousy in his eyes.

“When I was still in line to inherit the throne of my home country,” Eve nodded, “I took a husband.”

“Did you love him?” Glenn still put on an air of indifference though the grip of his fingers on her hips tightened ever so slightly.

“Of course.” Eve answered honestly, rather cruelly enjoying Glenn’s jealousy. “I wouldn’t have chosen to marry someone I didn’t love.”

“You chose to marry him?” Glenn was genuinely curious now. “It wasn’t arranged?”

“No.” Eve shook her head. “The only stipulation to my marriage was that I had to choose a commoner.”

“Why a commoner?” Glenn cocked his head to the side, frowning slightly in a way that Eve found most adorable.

“There was a saying in my homeland,” Eve said while letting her eyes scan over Glenn’s features, “a grass is a grass no matter what hill it grows upon. That is to say, we are all people regardless of our station. Every heir to the throne would have to spend a year of their adolescence with a peasant family to learn to empathise with the people.”

“That doesn’t explain why you had to marry a commoner.”

“We put emphasis on relations between the nobility and the common people.” Eve elaborated. “One way that we did this was the tradition of the heir to the throne marrying a commoner.”

“What if you had fallen in love with a noble?” Glenn frowned.

“There was one way you could circumvent the rule.” Eve tapped a finger to her chin in thought. “If the heir fell in love with a noble, that noble would have to renounce their title and shirk their family name. They would then have to live as a commoner for at least two years before being able to marry.”

“That sounds needlessly complicated.”

“It was to ensure that no noble family could curry favours with the Emperor to gain more power.” Eve shrugged.

“So, your husband… who was he?” Glenn asked, a tinge of jealousy once again finding its way into his voice.

“He was a member of the royal guard.” Eve answered, but not before gently kissing her lover. “The gatekeeper at the entrance to the palace. I actually used to hate him.”

Eve giggled at the memory which was met with a frown by Glenn. But his curiosity must have outweighed his jealousy for he continued to inquire.

“Why did you hate him?” He asked, cocking his head to the side.

“I used to sneak out a lot.” Eve laughed more heartily this time. “As you can imagine, he was often an obstacle in that regard.”

“Did you bring him with you when you travelled to Fodlan first?” Glenn pressed. Eve adored how much he seemed to care about her and her past. “What happened when he found out you didn’t age?”

“No.” Eve shook her head in response to Glenn’s first question. “And, for better or for worse, he never did find out about my age.”

“What happened?” Glenn frowned, picking up on the sudden melancholic tone that took over Eve’s voice.

“Well for starters, when we first wed, even I didn’t know I would stop ageing.” Eve explained. “I was eighteen and he was four years my senior. And when I did stop ageing, I knew I had a couple years to figure out how to bring it up before it would start being obvious. But… in the end I didn’t have to worry about it.”

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” Glenn cupped Eve’s face gently in his calloused hand, concern written on his face.

“If I don’t tell you, who else will know?” Eve asked. “I hate to think these lives I’ve intersected with will be lost to time while I carry on living.”

“Then go on.” Glenn encouraged with a small smile.

“The country immediately to the west of us was rife with rebellion—shattered into factions between warring states.” Eve tapped absently against Glenn’s shoulder where her hand rested, eyes glazed over with the memory.

“International relations had been my duty. Under my policies, we had allied ourselves with the faction that controlled the land we shared a border with. Not only did it make sense in terms of avoiding conflict, but the leader of that faction also held to ideals that aligned with our own in many ways.”

Eve took a shaky breath as she realised she was skirting around the actual point. It had been ages since she had recounted to anyone, herself included, what had transpired when her homeland still existed.

“All this to say, there was a point just a year after I had stopped ageing when that faction’s leader had an opportunity to defeat their biggest rival and essentially end the civil war in their nation. This would require our aid, however.”

“You and your husband went to fight for them?” Glenn’s brow furrowed. “Why wouldn’t you just send reinforcements?”

“It was meant to be a show of good faith.” Eve sighed. “If I fought on the battlefield beside the future leader of our neighbouring nation, it would solidify our positive relationship. And, should the occasion ever arise, it put them in our debt to fight for us as well. It was a calculated risk; I thought the benefits outweighed the risk.”

Eve paused for a moment when Glenn reached out to brush a tear from her cheek. When had she started crying? When was the last time she had cried before now?

“I never fought by his side.” Eve’s voice hitched in her throat as the regret from years past came flooding back. “I was always too worried about him if we were fighting together. He didn’t need me to baby him. I sent him to his death, Glenn; I made the battle plan that put us on opposite sides of the battlefield.”

“You couldn’t have known, Kiko.” Glenn comforted, brushing away her tears as quickly as they came.

“I didn’t know he was dead until the fighting had subsided.” Eve said softly. “Like a fool, I celebrated while our allies raised their banners and cheered for a united nation. One of his men brought me the news… that amidst the fighting he had protected them and died in their place. I ran to his body, but there was nothing I could do. He was gone; no matter how much I tried to use my Crest in vain, he was gone.”

Eve was openly weeping now, throwing herself into Glenn’s arms and burying his face in his shoulder. She truly could not remember the last time she had allowed herself to feel like this. It wasn’t since the person she had sworn fealty to House Fraldarius for that someone knew this much about her or her past.

“I’m sorry.” Eve breathed as she pulled back to look at Glenn. “It’s unlike me to lose my head like this.”

“Don’t apologise.” Glenn shook his head furiously. “I want to know these parts of you. I want to be someone you can share this side of yourself with.”

“Why?” Eve couldn’t help but ask, confused as to why anyone would want that.

“Because I love you.” He answered simply.

For a moment, a look of shock flitted through Glenn’s eyes as if he himself had not been prepared for him to say that. But that shock quickly passed and was replaced with an astonishing certainty. As Eve failed to find words, he seemed increasingly sure of himself and his words.

“I love you, Eve—Tsukiko.” Glenn repeated with feeling. “I don’t care if you don’t feel the same way. But I’d rather fall upon my own blade than go another moment without you knowing.”

“You oaf.” Eve shook with a breathy laugh as the last of her tears fell. “Of course I love you.”

* * *

Sylvain knocked on Eve’s door for quite some time with no answer. And when he noticed her door was unlocked, he had been too worried about her to concern himself with whether or not he should go barging in. But when he grabbed her shoulder gently to shake her awake, Sylvain was rather frighteningly met with the cold steel of a dagger against his throat.

“Woah, kitten, it’s just me!” Sylvain said quickly, withdrawing his hands to hold them up.

“Goddess, Sylvain, I almost killed you.” Eve huffed as she finally recognised the figure kneeling beside her bed. “What were you thinking barging in here?”

“I was worried about you, kitten.” Sylvain frowned, brow knitted with concern.

“Worried?” Eve asked as she placed her dagger back under her pillow.

“I could hear you crying from upstairs.” Sylvain explained softly. “I wanted to make sure you were okay.”

“I was crying?” Eve’s hand flew up to her face in shock, coming away wet with tears.

She seemed genuinely shaken by her own tears, looking down with confusion at her glistening fingertips.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sylvain asked.

He wanted to open up a dialogue, allow his friend to say what was on her mind. But he also didn’t want to push her. As of late, he had challenged her a lot when it came to her relationships with His Highness and Felix and he didn’t want to pester her too much.

“…I’ve been dreaming a lot about Glenn lately.” Eve said after a pause.

She moved to sit up fully, crossing her legs as she patted the space beside her in invitation. Sylvain gratefully accepted and stood from his rather uncomfortable stoop by her bedside.

“What kind of dreams?” Sylvain asked after he had settled.

“Memories.” Eve said softly.

Looking over at her, Sylvain decided that Eve looked impossibly small all of a sudden. Even passed out in His Highness’ arms after fainting in Conand Tower she had looked more powerful than she did now. And as he examined her quietly, looking at the scar she had gotten for Felix, Sylvain wondered how many of her scars she had accrued for Glenn. How many would she accrue for His Highness?

“Sometimes when I look at Ingrid, I feel so guilty.” Eve met Sylvain’s eyes with a look of self-loathing that he had previously only seen in the mirror. “She looked up to him. And even if she won’t call it as such, she loved him. I would’ve taken him away from her either way.”

“Rodrigue thinks he knew his son. And yet he knows nothing of our relationship. And Felix… Felix always living in his brother’s shadow, he’s coming dangerously close to figuring out the relationship I had with Glenn.”

“What will you do if he finds out?” Sylvain asked curiously.

“I don’t know.” Eve breathed. “Some terrible part of me wants him to find out because otherwise Glenn’s memory dies.”

“You’re not the only one who remembers him.” Sylvain comforted, placing a hand on the small of Eve’s back. “We all have our own memories of him and how we knew him to be.”

“But you’ll all die too.” She muttered, shocking Sylvain silent for a moment. “You’ll all die, and I’ll have to carry on and tell all your stories.”

“Then let us die, kitten.” Sylvain replied. “It shouldn’t be up to you to keep the memory of all those you’ve left behind.”

“Sylvain, I’ve spent my entire life trying to convince myself I’m alive.” Eve turned to look in his eyes, searching them desperately. But for what, Sylvain had no idea. “The only way I can keep on living like this is if I make the effort to bring with me the memory of all those I’ve outlived.”

“Did anyone ask you to do that?” Sylvain asked.

The words sounded rather mean coming from his mouth and he watched as Eve recoiled a bit. But it was a genuine question—one he truly wanted the answer to. He couldn’t bear thinking of Eve carrying on the memory of all the people she had outlived. Knowing how she had been living in secret, not letting anyone but the head of House Fraldarius know what she was, there was no way those memories weren’t weighing heavy on her soul. There was no point in her holding onto all those lives past if she was the only one who remembered them.

“N-no.” Eve stuttered, clearly taken off guard. “But for me to keep on living, the least I can do is keep them alive in my heart.”

“When I die, Eve,” Sylvain said, speaking gravely, “I want you to let me die. Let me fade into oblivion. I don’t need you to hold onto my memory—I don’t want you to.”

“You’re just saying that to make me feel better.” Eve averted her eyes, crossing her arms with a huff.

“No.” Sylvain said firmly, shifting so Eve had to look at him. “I don’t want to die knowing that I’ll be leaving you with an eternal burden. Even if I lived the most fulfilled life, there’s no way I could die happy if I knew you’d be in pain thinking you had to carry on my memory.”

“Do you really feel that way?” Eve asked with pleading eyes.

“I do.” Sylvain nodded.

For a moment, Sylvain saw relief wash through Eve’s eyes. He thought that for once he had been able to offer her some genuine council. But just as quickly as that relief had washed over her, it was replaced by a soul shattering dread.

“Then what am I alive for?”


	42. Fourty-One

“Here you are.”

Eve smiled as she approached Felix on the bridge that led to the Cathedral. He had looked so at peace, looking out at the chasm below, that she almost didn’t want to call out to him.

“Were you looking for me?” Felix turned to look at her as she came to stand beside him.

“Hm not necessarily.” Eve mused. “Just wondered where you were when I didn’t see you for lunch and couldn’t find you in the training hall.”

“I don’t live in the training hall.” Felix huffed.

“Fooled me.” Eve teased with a grin and a chuckle.

“Were you going to the Cathedral?” Felix asked, wondering why she would be headed that way if she wasn’t looking for him. “I thought you didn’t pray.”

“Perhaps I’m feeling a little extra devout.” Eve sighed, turning her gaze upward to look towards the heavens. She brought her head back down when she was struck by a particular thought. “Why don’t you pray, Felix? Your father is rather religious.”

“I don’t believe in all that.” Felix scoffed. “My father might be a blind fool, but I don’t put my stock in an imaginary woman.”

“But why not?” Eve asked with a small frown. “I’m not trying to convince you of anything—Goddess knows I’m no poster child for the Church of Seiros—I’m just curious is all.”

“My mother.” Felix answered simply.

“Your mother?” Eve echoed, her frown deepening in confusion.

Felix didn’t know, but Eve had very much known his mother. She had been just as devout a follower of the Church of Serios as Rodrigue was. And besides, she had died when Felix was still just an infant. How could she have influenced his belief?

“I don’t know if you know this, but she died in the plague shortly after giving birth to me.” It was Felix’s turn to lift his head up towards the sky as he spoke. “She was a good person—or so my father and my brother told me. Why would a so-called ‘benevolent’ goddess kill a good person?”

Felix now turned to look at Eve intensely, a shocking vulnerability in his eyes. He had been opening up more and more to her in recent days, and Eve wasn’t sure what to do about it. Should she be happy that he was finally learning to be vulnerable? Or should she be more sceptical and regard it simply as another one of his ploys to get her to choose him over Dimitri?

“So, either the Goddess doesn’t exist, or she does and she let my mother die.” Felix continued.

“What if it’s neither?” Eve asked quietly.

“What do you mean?” Felix frowned.

“What if the Goddess does exist, but she’s just…gone?” Eve elaborated. “I believe in the Goddess; I believe she exists. But what if she’s just been sleeping or dormant or something, and that’s why things are the way they are? It’s why I often don’t pray because I always felt like no one was listening. But something has changed, shifted. I get this feeling like maybe the Goddess is waking up or some form of her is coming back to Fodlan.”

She knew she couldn’t tell Felix all that she knew that made her believe this. But between what Rhea had wanted her to do all those years ago and what she knew had been done to the Professor, Eve was sure some piece of the Goddess had returned to Fodlan. Even if for now it only manifested as the Professor’s ability to wield the Sword of the Creator, Eve could feel the power of the Goddess growing.

“That’s a nice thing to believe.” Felix sounded forlorn which surprised Eve.

She had expected him to laugh at her or call her foolish; she never would have expected for him to look like he wished he thought that way too.

“What do you believe in, Felix?” Eve asked, watching him closely.

“You.” He said with an astonishing amount of certainty. “Me. The people and things that I can see. What use does it do me to believe in something that may or may not exist when I can put my faith in something real?”

As he turned to look at her, Eve suddenly felt her resolve crumble. His gaze was direct, piercing, looking directly through her and into her soul. His faith in her, in what he felt for her, made Eve wonder if she could really go through with the wedding after all.

If she believed in the Goddess and in divine intervention, then she had to have loved Felix for some reason. Following the path of faith and destiny meant that Eve would have to believe that she was meant to love Felix and therefore perhaps meant to break her vow to Dimitri.

And yet if Eve took Felix’s approach and believed in herself and the things before her, then didn’t she still have to consider that she was meant to break her vow? She loved Felix, of this she was sure now, and her heart had not wavered. Even now when she should have been preparing to let him go, she was still clinging to what little time she had with him.

Both paths seemed to lead to Felix, and Eve had been staunchly ignoring this fact up until now. But what was she to do? All of her anxieties about what could happen should she refuse to marry Dimitri still stood. And after the situation in Remire, Eve was even more sure that something nefarious was happing in Fodlan. She wasn’t so narcissistic as to believe that she could change the course of the nation, but could she really afford to potentially destabilise the Church and the Kingdom over her selfish desire?

“Hey, can you do me a favour?” Felix asked suddenly, his tone changing to a drastically more casual one.

“What is it?” Eve asked with a small frown as she tried to shake away the thoughts clouding her mind.

“Do you think you can volunteer for the White Heron Cup?” He asked.

“What, why?” Eve balked. “I don’t want to do it.”

“Well, maybe convince the Professor to pick Flayn or something. I know she’s been practically begging to represent the Blue Lions.” Felix suggested with a shrug. “Or even Ferdinand. I think Edelgard is representing the Black Eagles and I’m sure he’d jump at the opportunity to prove he’s better than her at something.”

“I’m pretty sure Dorothea is representing the Black Eagles.” Eve’s brow furrowed as she spoke. “And why does it matter to you anyways?”

“The Professor picked me for some reason, and I was hoping you’d be able to convince her otherwise.” Felix sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, a tinge of embarrassment in his features.

“You don’t want to?” Eve cocked her head to the side, grinning at the slight blush that dusted his cheeks.

“Like hell I do!” He barked. “This stupid dance contest shouldn’t even be happening. Doesn’t anyone care that the librarian betrayed us and the Death Knight is back?”

“Dancing is more useful than you think, Felix.” Eve smiled gently.

“If you’re talking about events that I’ll have to attend as a noble, I want no part in them.” Felix grumbled. “I’m only interested in things that’ll help me on the battlefield.”

“Perhaps I can convince you.” Eve said. “Come with me to the training grounds.”

Without waiting for a response, Eve turned on her heel and began walking towards the training hall. She knew without looking that Felix would follow her without question, though this did leave a bit of a bitter taste in her mouth.

When they got to the training grounds, Eve went straight to the rack of wooden swords and grabbed one for her and one for Felix.

“Spar me.” She said as she tossed the sword to Felix who caught it with ease.

“And what?” He raised a sceptical eyebrow. “If you win, I have to participate in the White Heron Cup?”

“Not exactly.” Eve smiled. “You’ll see in a moment.”

She knew Felix wouldn’t argue. For one, it was her who was asking him to do it. But also, Felix never needed an excuse to swing his sword. Immediately, he took up his stance and began to circle her.

Eve waited for Felix to make the first move, and she didn’t have to wait for long. He swung at her with gusto, letting his sword follow a large arc that would have been hard to dodge. But Eve quickly twirled out of reach from his blade on the balls of her feet. Felix was quick to follow up with another onslaught of attacks, but Eve nimbly danced out of the reach of all of them without ever needing to raise her own blade to block.

“Stop dodging and fight me, dammit.” Felix growled after a few frustrated minutes of this.

“If you insist.” Eve shrugged, once again dancing out of reach of his attacks.

In one swift movement, she dodged the thrust of his sword and turned so that she was behind him. Before he could even react and turn around, she had struck the backs of his knees forcing him to fall to the ground.

“How-?” Felix looked up at her with clear frustration in his eyes as Eve offered a hand to pull him up to his feet.

“A lot of dancing footwork can be applied to fencing and just battle in general.” Eve explained as he took her hand. “Dancing requires you to be light on your feet and shift your stance at the flip of a gold coin. Everything I did to dodge your attacks was dancing footwork.”

“Okay, so maybe you have a point.” Felix grumbled. “I still don’t want to do this stupid dance contest.”

“Even if I help you train?” Eve raised an eyebrow.

“I already had a training session with the Professor.” Felix said.

“The best way to learn to dance is with a partner.” Eve replied with a smile, once again extending her hand to him.

“If I look stupid during the competition, I’m blaming you.” Felix grumbled, though he accepted her hand as a light blush formed on his cheeks.

Eve started with the basics, walking Felix through the different stances and steps. She relished the opportunity to hold him close, to dance with him as though they could be allowed to stay like this. And a renegade part of her heart wondered if this was what it would be like should she choose him. Would they go to balls together as the Lord and Lady of House Fraldarius? Would she be able to convince Felix to join her for just one dance as he grumbled about how stupid and stuffy those events were?

 _It doesn’t matter_. She chastised herself. _I’m going to marry Dimitri and that will be the end of it. This is the path I have to take._

But it wasn’t the path she wanted to take, and her heart ached for it. She felt so stupid, so selfish, for letting her heart run wild like this and allowing her to consider a different path. She had to marry Dimitri, right?

 _Goddess help me._ She pleaded as they danced together. _Show me the path between my heart and my duty. Am I allowed to be selfish? Can I take this path my heart has put me upon?_

Eve had never pleaded like this to the Goddess before, and she had definitely never hoped so badly for a response. Some modicum of the Goddess had returned to Fodlan. And she could only hope that enough of her was there to give her some kind of answer. Because Eve could no longer count on her willpower to keep her on the path of duty.

“What are you thinking?” Felix asked as they took a break from their dancing. “You’ve been so quiet this afternoon.”

“I was just thinking how much I like these moments like this.” Eve offered a half-truth with a smile.

“But it wasn’t enough.” Felix said with a certain melancholy that tore straight through Eve’s heart.

“What do you mean?” Eve asked, though she knew exactly what he meant.

“The White Heron Cup is soon which means the ball is soon which means the wedding is soon.” Felix elaborated. “And I wasn’t enough to convince you not to marry the boar.”

“If it makes you feel better, nothing would have been enough.” Eve said softly, though the thoughts that clouded both her mind and her heart were saying differently.

“You have your duty.” Felix nodded. “I respect that you honour that.”

“There’s just too much at stake, Felix.” She sighed, reaching out to cup his cheek in her hand.

“Are you trying to convince me or yourself?” Felix asked, once again looking at Eve as if he could see right through her.

“Does it matter?” Eve tried to smile, forcing down her doubts with a swallow.

“Just promise me one thing.” Felix said, leaning forward to rest his forehead against hers.

“Anything.” Eve breathed with her eyes closed.

“Don’t lose yourself for him.” Felix said. “I don’t want you to change into whatever makes the boar comfortable. Stay true to yourself. And don’t forget your promise that you won’t die on me. You especially cannot die for the boar.”

“I won’t.” Eve whispered despite everything in her being screaming at her not to make promises she couldn’t keep. “I promise you.”


	43. Fourty-Two

The Ethereal Moon had not lasted quite as long as Eve had hoped. The White Heron Cup had come and gone in what felt like a matter of moments. Felix had won the competition after a deciding vote from Shamir, and Sylvain had still not let him hear the end of it. And just like that it was time for the ball.

Just the night before, the Blue Lions had all made a promise to reunite five years in the future for the Millennium Festival. It had chilled Eve to think of where she would be in five years. Would she be the Queen of Faerghus? Or was there another path she would follow down? The fact that this close to the wedding she still didn’t know frightened Eve to her core.

And now it was the night of the ball. Despite the looming dread of what had happened in Remire, everyone was soaking in the revelries and enjoying themselves. Eve had watched as plain girls from various classes all clamoured to get one last dance with Dimitri before he was a married man. He had always been quite handsome, she thought, and popular with the girls. She found herself wishing with all her heart that he would somehow fall madly in love with one of the girls vying for his attention and forget all about his feelings for her.

But that would never happen, and she knew it. Even now as Dimitri danced with one of the younger girls from the Golden Deer who was absolutely smitten with him, he kept glancing up to look at Eve.

“Care to dance?” A flash of lavender and an extended hand snapped Eve back to reality.

“Yuri.” She said simply. “Rare to see you up here.”

“The Church spared no expense for this event.” Yuri said with a smile as Eve accepted his outstretched hand. “Even us down in Abyss deserve a little luxury here and there, no?”

“Who would’ve ever thought when we first met that we’d be dancing together like this at an event hosted by the Church of Seiros, huh?” Eve chuckled lightly as they danced.

“Stranger things have happened.” Yuri smirked. “You and I both know that.”

“Certainly…” Eve muttered half-heartedly.

As they danced some more, she caught sight of Dimitri with yet another girl. She was saying something to him rather passionately while he listened patiently with a polite smile. He was always so kind despite everything. Everything that had happened to him, even just everything Eve had put him through—she wouldn’t have blamed him if he had been bitter or spiteful.

“Have you made your decision yet?” Yuri whispered in her ear, his breath tickling her skin.

“My decision?” Eve frowned.

“Are you going to marry your prince?” Yuri asked.

“Since when was that a decision that needed to be made?” Eve pulled back to look at Yuri’s face.

“You tell me.” He smirked, throwing a less than subtle glance in the direction of the corner where Felix had taken up residence to sulk for the entire night.

Before she could answer—or rather, fail to do so—Eve was saved by Sylvain cutting in.

“Stop trying to monopolise her, Yuri.” Sylvain clapped his shoulder with a hearty laugh. “She’s about to be a married woman, you know.”

“Oh, I know.” Yuri smirked once more at Eve.

“This is my last night to try and woo her, so scoot!” Sylvain laughed again.

Yuri graciously bowed out, but not before giving Eve a rather meaningful look. She knew he had no stake in what happened, but he was also the kind of person who needed to know what was going on. If she was going to walk out on her duty, he wanted to know that in order to prepare for however that might affect Abyss and his people. But unfortunately for him, Eve still wasn’t even sure what she was going to do.

“I know that look, kitten.” Sylvain said softly as they danced.

“What do you mean?” Eve scrunched up her nose in distaste. She wasn’t used to being so easy to read and was annoyed that lately she had taken to betraying her own emotions on her face.

“You still haven’t decided.” Sylvain said rather seriously though he kept a smile plastered on his face. She appreciated the effort he made to ensure no one would suspect their conversation.

“Not this from you as well.” Eve sighed, burying her face into his chest.

“What happened, kitten?” He asked. “Up until recently you were so staunch on the fact that you would perform your duty no matter how you felt. What changed?”

“I don’t know.” Eve replied. “I guess I started dreaming of Glenn and thinking about him and how I would’ve done anything for him. And I guess all those memories made me want to rebel again.”

“The wedding is tomorrow.” Sylvain said gently.

“I know, I know. I just…” Eve trailed off.

She just what? She just didn’t know? She just missed Glenn? She just wanted more time?

“Alright, that’s enough of that.” Sylvain said, placing a gentle kiss on the crown of her head. “Tonight’s a night for fun, so I’m going to leave you alone. Go have fun, kitten.”

With that and a final reassuring squeeze of her hands, Sylvain left Eve’s side to go dance with some other girls.

Eve knew that she would miss Sylvain the most when she inevitably outlived this generation of friends. But she found some solace in the fact that he knew the truth. That meant she could allow herself to stay in his life for longer without worrying about him questioning her lack of ageing.

It had always hurt the most when she had to leave those people in her life after only a few years. She had had to disappear on friends and lovers without so much as an explanation. That was something she treasured about the stability of serving House Fraldarius. She never had to leave, never had to prematurely give up the relationships she had formed. But it also meant that she was always around when those she cherished inevitably died without her.

There was always the option, though, that faint voice in the back of her mind. Eve could share her longevity; she knew it was possible. But who was she to play Goddess? If she did that, was she any better than Rhea?

“Hey, Eve!”

A chipper voice startled Eve from her thoughts and she turned to see Ashe beaming up at her. He had a light dusting of blush across his cheeks and Eve could tell that he had taken advantage of the fine wine the Church had provided for the night.

“Hello.” She smiled in greeting, taking a sip of her own drink that she hadn’t remembered grabbing.

“Perhaps I should start calling you ‘Your Highness’ now.” Ashe frowned slightly.

“There’s no need.” Eve laughed with a dismissive wave of her hand. “No matter my station, you can always call me Eve.”

“Well, anyways,” Ashe glanced around curiously before continuing, “I had a question for you.”

“Ask away.” Eve motioned invitingly with another smile.

“When did you know you loved His Highness?” Ashe asked.

“When?” Eve echoed, looking out into the crowd and almost immediately picking out his mop of blonde hair.

“Or, I guess, _how_ did you know you were in love with His Highness?” Ashe rephrased his question as his eyes followed hers.

“Well, I suppose there’s a lot of factors.” Eve said slowly, trying to buy herself time to come up with an answer.

There was no use coming up with lies because Ashe knew Dimitri. He would be able to tell what was and wasn’t true. So, Eve decided to speak from the heart. Dimitri was a good person and plenty of girls at the Academy loved him for his princely façade. It would be entirely believable if she just listed things everyone already knew about him.

“You don’t need me to tell you how kind he is.” Eve chuckled softly. “And I suppose that is the main thing. Dimitri is perhaps the kindest person I’ve ever met.”

This was not a revolutionary thing for Eve to say. She said this because everyone knew this.

“I’ve lived a rather sheltered life away from other people.” She continued. “I’ve never really learned how to trust or get to know others; I lie as a default because of it. But Dimitri never faulted me for this. He never accused me of not trusting him; he never forced me to open up to him.”

While this was perhaps not a widely known fact, it was simply tied to his kindness. He often offered support to his peers who would not do the same for him. She only said this because she needed to convince Ashe.

“And he’s never wanted anything from me; he doesn’t expect anything of me. Not in a negative way, but more like he doesn’t push any unreal or harmful expectations on me. He has always simply wanted me to be myself with him.”

Why was she still talking? Surely those two examples had been enough. Ashe was gullible and trusting, this wasn’t an inquisition.

“All this and I still haven’t mentioned his passionate heart. He always wants to help others, to learn new things. And Dimitri has never cared about his title or his station—he sees everyone as equals. He just--.”

Eve cut herself off when she realised she was speaking too much. She hadn’t needed to say all that. Ashe had most definitely gotten the point already, so why did she continue? Why was it so easy for her to think of all those things?

“Is there some reason you ask?” Eve tried to compose herself as she turned to smile at Ashe.

“N-no reason!” He blushed deeply and Eve caught the quick flash of his eye over to a certain redheaded classmate of theirs.

“You should ask her to dance.” Eve smiled with a nod in Annette’s direction.

With that, Eve excused herself to get some fresh air. As she stepped outside into the brisk, silent air, she couldn’t help the stirring in her chest.

Why was it so easy to come up with things she loved about Dimitri? Ever since his confession of love, she had refused to even consider him in that light. But had she always been harbouring these feelings? Had she always held Dimitri in such high regard?

Eve knew that she did not deserve to love again. That was why she had pushed Dimitri away. But then everything with Felix had happened and she had been unable—unwilling—to stop it.

“Goddess, what do I do?” She whispered into the night sky, craning her neck up to look at the stars as if they could provide her with an answer.

* * *

“Running away? I understand. You hardly had the time to breathe in there. It must be hard to be the favourite teacher at the ball! Poor, poor Professor!” Sothis giggled as Byleth left the revelries of the ball to stand in the courtyard.

“It is difficult.” Byleth answered absently.

“So you do think you're the favourite! I might have known.” Sothis laughed again before sobering up. “Hold a moment. Who is that?”

Byleth looked across the dark courtyard to see a figure with their head turned towards the heavens. It took a moment of her eyes adjusting to recognise the person as her own student.

“Eve?” Byleth called out.

“Professor!” She seemed startled, caught off guard which she seldom was.

“What are you doing out here?” Byleth asked much at the behest of Sothis.

“Do you know the story of the Goddess Tower, Professor?” Eve asked after a moment of thought rather than answering the Professor’s question.

“I’ve heard of it.” Byleth answered simply.

“I’ve heard so many different versions, it’s hard to say which—if any—are true.” Eve laughed though it sounded hollow. “But they say this night is when the Goddess is closest to us. So maybe a wish made at the Goddess Tower will be heard. Or maybe the Goddess will send your true love to you there. Or perhaps a promise made before the Goddess at the Tower will be made unbreakable. Do you believe it, Professor?”

“Do you?”

Byleth got the feeling like Eve wanted to ask her something, something more than she was saying. She had always been the most mysterious of Byleth’s students. The Professor often was of the impression that Eve knew far more than she was ever going to let on. So these questions almost felt pointed, as if she were after something specific.

“I don’t know.” Eve smiled in response to the Professor’s question. Byleth noted how wistful she looked in that moment. “I think I want to believe. But my prayers have never been answered.”

“Perhaps not in a way you’re aware of.” Byleth said.

“Maybe you’re right.” Eve half laughed. “Will you then hear my prayer tonight?”

Byleth simply nodded in response. This was perhaps the most Eve had ever spoken to her—especially without Dimitri by her side. It made her wonder why, all of a sudden, she was willing to open up to her.

“I must make an impossible choice.” Eve said, looking directly at Byleth as if begging her to hear her words. “I thought this decision was going to be an easy one, in fact I never thought I was going to have to consider it. I always thought there was only one path for me to take. But lately my heart has changed. All I can hope is that the Goddess will show me the right path.”

“The way this child looks at you…” Sothis trailed off in thought. “It is almost as if she knows I am here.”

“Thank you for hearing my woes, Professor.” Eve smiled gently. “I should leave you alone now. I imagine you didn’t come out here looking to see other people.”

Before Byleth could respond, Eve turned on her heel and walked away towards the Goddess Tower.

“What an odd one that Eve.” Sothis muttered.

“I don’t understand her motives.” Byleth frowned in thought. “What did she want from me.”

“Perhaps she simply wanted someone to listen.” Sothis offered. “Regardless, there is something strange about her. I suggest we look more into who she is very soon.”

Before Byleth could consider this, she was approached by yet another of her students that happened upon the courtyard.

“Professor? What are you doing here?” Dimitri walked towards Byleth with a curious frown upon his face.

“Aren't you going to dance with Claude?” Byleth asked, trying her best to joke with him.

“Good one, Professor.” Dimitri laughed. “I could see saving a dance for Edelgard, but Claude is another story. In any case, I have no intention of dancing with anyone.”

Byleth frowned at this. She had very much seen Dimitri dancing with people throughout the night. Though, notably he had not once danced with his own fiancée

“As a child, Edelgard taught me how to dance. It was...a bit awkward, honestly.” Dimitri explained when he saw the Professor’s confusion.

“As a child?” Byleth cocked her head to the side in curiosity.

“I've told you before we're siblings by marriage, haven't I?” Dimitri asked to which Byleth nodded. “Her birth mother was my stepmother, although I didn't know that at the time. My stepmother treated me with such kindness...just as though I were her own flesh and blood. And yet she never so much as hinted that she had her own child...Edelgard. We were born and raised in different territories, without ever knowing the other even existed. Yet, against all odds, for just over a year, we became childhood friends.”

“Friends?” Byleth’s brow furrowed.

“Indeed. Unaware of each other's stations or backgrounds, we met and became incredibly close. This was when she and Lord Arundel were living in the Kingdom.” Dimitri explained.

“Why were they in the Kingdom?” Byleth asked.

“They were in exile... This was a time of great turmoil within the Empire.” Dimitri continued, a gloss of distant memories glazing over his eyes. “I ran into her when visiting Lord Arundel's residence with my father. She seemed...quite bored. With everything. At first I found her to be difficult and stubborn, but that facade quickly fell away, revealing her true self beneath... That's around the time when she taught me how to dance. Her instruction was... Oh, let's call it strict. To put it nicely.”

Dimitri chuckled at this. It seemed to Byleth that he held those memories quite dear. And suddenly it made sense to her the way he would look at the leader of the Black Eagles house. She had at first wondered if he had a crush on Edelgard before he had explained they were siblings by marriage. But now she realised that he truly treasured his childhood memories of her.

“That one year before she had to return to the Empire was...so much fun. The time of my life, in many ways.” Dimitri smiled wistfully. “It's kind of pathetic to think about it all these years later, but can you guess what I gave her as a parting gift?”

“A dagger?” Byleth offered, half joking.

“Huh. Good guess, Professor.” Dimitri’s eyebrows went up in shock much to the Professor’s surprise. “But I swear, it came from the heart.”

“What a strange boy.” Sothis interjected.

“In Faerghus, we've long considered blades as tools of destiny. As a way to cut a path to a better future.” Dimitri rushed to explain himself. “She was being dragged all over, unable to live the life she wanted. I thought the dagger could help her cut out a path to the future she dreamed of. However...that was many years ago. I'm sure she's forgotten all about the boy I was back then.”

“It's not too late to reconnect.” Byleth offered gently.

“I'm afraid it's far too late for that. Things are different now. She's different. I'm different.” Dimitri seemed suddenly overcome by a certain sadness as he spoke before shaking his head as if to shake the memory away. “Anyway... I'm feeling a bit out of place here. Festivities like this don't suit me.”

He paused as he moved to turn away, seemingly stuck between the want to escape the revelries and his feeling of obligation to return to the ball.

“Still, I suppose I should get back in there.” He gave the Professor a tight smile as he bowed at the waist. “Good-bye, Professor.”

“You should go to the Goddess Tower.” Byleth said before he could turn away.

“Pardon?” Dimitri’s brow furrowed.

“If you’re looking for fresh air.” Byleth explained. “No one is on that part of the monastery. You’ll be able to have some quiet to yourself.”

“Thank you, Professor.” Dimitri dipped his head in a shallow bow. “I believe I’ll take you up on that piece of advice.”

“It is not like you to meddle like this.” Sothis said with an air of amusement as they watched the prince walk away. “That girl’s prayer was for me was it not?”

“I’m not meddling.” Byleth shook her head. “What they decide to do from here is up to them.”

Truly, Byleth wasn’t sure if she had made the right call by involving herself. But she had seen how Dimitri looked at Eve. No one could speak to Eve’s emotions or intentions, but Byleth got the feeling that she was in need of someone to show her what direction to go in. Whether that direction came from divine intervention or not didn’t seem to be of much importance.

And as she had said, what they decided to do from there was up to them. Not even the Goddess could tell them what was the right path.


	44. Fourty-Three

The Goddess Tower had more steps than Dimitri had anticipated. He felt almost as if he were climbing up to the heavens themselves as he ascended the spiral staircase. The Professor had been right, though; there wasn’t a soul around in this part of the monastery. For just a moment the silence allowed him to savour the respite of not having to present a façade to all the eyes that watched him.

He was, for lack of a better word, exhausted. Ever since the Blue Sea Moon—no, ever since he had met the Professor, Dimitri felt like his life had been thrown into disarray. But nothing had affected him as deeply as meeting Eve had.

Dimitri had always thought that he would never fall in love for several reasons. The first was that he simply could not imagine the type of person he would fall for. Sylvain had asked him before what kind of girls he was into, but Dimitri had never had an answer. And Dimitri believed that the second reason he thought he would never fall in love was to blame for this. Because the Faerghus Prince was acutely aware of the fact that a part of him did not want to fall in love. Falling in love meant treasuring someone, holding someone dear, opening himself up to once again lose someone that meant the world to him. He never again wanted to feel that same excruciating pain he felt after what happened in Duscur. If he never loved someone, he could never feel the pain of losing them. But the paramount reason Dimitri thought he would never fall in love was because he did not deserve to. The voices that haunted his every living moment reminded him constantly that he was unworthy of love or happiness. How could he ever deserve to love when all those that died for him could not?

But he had never counted on meeting someone like Eve. If Dimitri ever had considered the type of person he would want to love, he was sure it would not have been someone like Eve. And it wasn’t as if he had fallen in love with her at first sight. It had been gradual—a creeping feeling that he attributed first to becoming her friend before all of a sudden, she consumed his heart.

He remembered fondly the time between their first meeting and when he had foolishly proclaimed his love to her. It was when she had been most open to him and he had learned the most about her. Even if she hardly said anything about her past, it was simply her demeanour that was open. She had smiled more then. And though it had been embarrassing, Dimitri missed when she used to tease him or laugh at him.

That time was over now, though. He had ruined it by telling her he loved her.

But even after he had shattered their precarious friendship, there were still moments that felt like it had before. And it was those moments that, unfortunately, ensured Dimitri only fell deeper and deeper in love with Eve.

He remembered particularly a moment during the Horsebow moon that had made his heart run wild with delusions of how Eve might feel for him.

She had asked him to join her for a late lunch, excitedly telling him she was trying out a new soup recipe for the next time she had kitchen duty. Eve had brought him to the mostly empty dining hall and placed a steaming hot bowl of whatever she had made in front of him. It certainly did not look appetising, but the smell was pleasing enough. Dimitri could pick out particular scents that he recognised but couldn’t put names to. And as he took a tentative spoonful, she had watched him with such keen interest that he almost felt self-conscious.

“How is it?” She asked as soon as the liquid had passed his lips.

“It smells wonderful.” He smiled in response. “And it warms me right to my core. It’ll be a wonderful soup now that it is getting chillier outside.”

Eve didn’t say anything in response, but rather she leaned back and looked at Dimitri quizzically.

“Did I say something wrong?” Dimitri’s brow furrowed with worry.

“You can’t taste, can you?” Eve asked suddenly.

“I- whatever do you mean?” Dimitri balked, worried that she would be offended he had lied about the previous foods she had asked him to taste.

“I had an inkling that you couldn’t taste.” Eve said with a small frown. “I realised you only ever commented on the smell or texture or presentation of foods. You never talked about how it tasted.”

“Those things are just as important as taste when it comes to eating.” Dimitri tried to smile.

“There’s no reason to hide it.” Eve shrugged. “I intentionally made this soup as foul as I could without making it poisonous or having its smell give it away.”

“Eve, why would you do that?” Dimitri frowned in turn.

“I don’t know.” She shrugged again. “I was curious to see if I was right.”

It hadn’t been a particularly kind thing of her to do. Dimitri shuddered to imagine what that soup would’ve tasted like had she been wrong. But it had made him feel seen, noticed. Eve had paid enough attention to him to notice that he never commented on the taste of food. To Dimitri, this was proof enough that she cared about him. Otherwise, why else would she take the time to notice?

All of these thoughts swirling around in Dimitri’s head made it so that he did not notice the figure in the Goddess Tower until he had already reached the top of the steps.

They were standing with their back to him, palms placed on the windowsill and leaning so far forward Dimitri almost felt compelled to grab their shirt and pull them back in. Their neck was craned back, eyes closed as the moon shone its pale light on their face and the chilly winter breeze sent their hair into disarray.

“Eve?”

It was just a whisper that passed Dimitri’s lips; a startled gasp as he realised who was there before him.

“Who’s there?” She whipped around quickly to see where the voice came from.

But the movement threw her off her balance and she stumbled backwards. To Dimitri it seemed all to happen in slow motion; and in that moment, he threw his chivalry and his promise out of the proverbial window to save Eve from the very real one she was about to fall out of.

“Eve!” He called out to her again, rushing forward to wrap his arms around her and pull her to his chest.

For a moment, he was unwilling to let go both out of terror and out of a desire to keep her close to him like this.

“Dimitri?” Eve murmured softly into his shoulder where her face was buried.

“Forgive me.” He quickly released his hold on her and took several paces back. “I lost my mind in a moment of panic.”

“There’s nothing to forgive.” She said with a quick glance over her shoulder at the window before turning back to Dimitri. “You saved me.”

“But my promise…” Dimitri trailed off, looking off to the side to avoid Eve’s piercing gaze.

“Let’s make a new one.” She said.

At this, Dimitri snapped his head back to look at Eve. It seemed to him that she was looking at him with brand new eyes. She had never regarded him in this way; not when they first met, not after he told her he loved her, not even in Remire when she saw his most ugly parts. And as it stood, Dimitri wasn’t sure how to feel about this new way she was regarding him.

Her eyes seemed hopeful, yet at the same time bound by something outside the two of them. It was as if she were saying goodbye, but not to him. Who or what was she letting go of? And why did that make her gaze suddenly so much more tender.

“I’ve been very unfair to you, Dimitri Alexandre Blayddid.” She said softly, stepping towards Dimitri. “I’ve lied to you, rejected you, cruelly fallen in love with your friend. And yet you have never once faltered in your kindness for me. You truly meant it when you said that a knight of Faerghus never goes back on their word.”

“Eve, I…” Dimitri’s brow furrowed. Why did he feel like he was the one she was going to say goodbye to?

“One of the legends of the Goddess Tower on this night is that a promise made between two people will be bound by the heavens to be unbreakable.” Eve said, turning away to glance once more out of the window towards the stars above. “So, I want to make a promise here to you.”

Eve turned back to Dimitri and it seemed to him as if her resolve had faltered. When she had started speaking, she appeared so sure of herself. But now, as she wrapped her arms around herself and glanced uneasily out of the window once more, she looked anxious.

So, against his better judgement, Dimitri did what he had done so many times before to no avail.

“Eve.” He said gently, holding out his hand in invitation for her to take it.

Never before did she take him up on his offer. It had often wounded him when she did not take his hand, but he had never stopped doing it. His hope had been that one day, she would accept his offer. And that perhaps her taking his hand would mean that she could take the next leap into opening her heart to him.

And Dimitri watched on, his heart breaking ever so slightly, as Eve simply looked at his outstretched hand. She seemed to be battling with something within and Dimitri wished that he could help ease the weight that she kept upon her heart.

But just as Dimitri was considering pulling his hand back, the unexpected happened. Eve closed the gap between them, reaching out to place her own hand in his. For a moment, the two of them simply stared at their interlocked hands. Dimitri felt as if his heart had stopped, but surely that couldn’t be the case because all he could hear was his pulse hammering away in his ears.

“Dimitri Alexandre Blayddid.” She said his full name for the second time that night, looking up from their hands to stare intensely into his eyes. “I promise here before the Goddess to learn to love you.”

“What?” His breath hitched in his throat, heart beating wildly as he prayed that he had not fabricated what he heard.

“I promise to learn to love you.” She repeated firmly. “I will no longer entertain my feelings for Felix. Starting tomorrow, I will be your wife and I will be devoted in that venture.”

“Eve, you don’t have to do this.” Dimitri shook his head. As happy as this made him to hear her say this, he didn’t want to force Eve to do something she didn’t want to.

“I’ve made my decision.” She said, though Dimitri thought he caught just the slightest of wavers in her voice.

“If that is so,” Dimitri swallowed thickly, “then I will do everything in my power to make your life with me a happy one. I have not stopped loving you, Eve.”

“I can’t…” Eve trailed off, stopping to take a shaky breath. “I can’t promise that this will be something that happens soon. I cannot speak to how long it will take me. But what I am promising here to you tonight is that I am going to _try_.”

“That is more than I would ever even ask of you.” Dimitri sighed, wishing more than anything that he could lean down and rest his forehead upon hers.

“I know it is unfair of me, but if I am to make this promise to you can I ask you to promise something in return?” Eve asked, searching Dimitri’s eyes for any hints of aversion.

“Anything.” Dimitri replied.

“Do you…” Eve trailed off again biting her lip and looking off to the side. “Do you think you could promise not to look quite so sad when you look at me?”

“Sad?” Dimitri balked. Had he led her to believe that she caused him sadness?

“I see it in your eyes, you know.” Eve sighed. “You know that I could have saved your father if I was in Duscur. And whether you’re cognizant of it or not, you look so sad when you look at me.”

“Eve, I’m so sorry.” Dimitri’s features crumpled. “I would never intentionally harm you.”

“I know.” Eve sighed again.

“I’ve been unfair to you.” Dimitri hung his head in shame. “It is true I have often thought about what might’ve happened in Duscur had you not hidden your Crest for so long. And sometimes, in moments of weakness, I have even blamed you. I promise you, that will stop tonight. You cannot change the past, and I cannot continue to blame you for something that was not your fault.”

“Thank you.” Eve smiled softly before turning her gaze towards the night sky. “I hope the Goddess has heard us and will bind us by our promises.”

“I am certain she has.” Dimitri said.

As he spoke, a particularly boisterous gust of wind howled right through the Goddess Tower where the two of them stood. Both of them shivered as their hair and clothing whipped in the wind.

“Perhaps we should return to the ball before we are missed too much.” Dimitri offered Eve a small smile as she brushed her hair back into place with her fingers.

“There’s one last thing, Dimitri.” Eve said as he had begun to walk back towards the stairs.

“What is it?” Dimitri turned to face her.

“I want you to kiss me.” Eve said with surprising certainty.

“Pardon?” Dimitri choked, once again convinced that he must have heard her wrong.

“I’m asking you to kiss me, Dimitri.” 


End file.
